I glance up at the clock near the filing cabinets and see it’s time to call it a day. As I close the drawer I’m working on, I hear the bell at the door up front and Sam start talking. I pay no attention as I gather my purse and keys. When I walk out front I stop dead and suck in my breath. There stands Landon looking delicious wearing clothes that fit him just right. Landon looks my way causing Sam to do the same.
“Heading out, have a nice weekend.” Sam says.
“Yes sir, you do the same.” I start to make my way to the door when I hear Landon mumble something to Sam and then a goodbye. I’m making my way to my car when Landon catches up.
“Hello to you too”.
I stop and look at him for a minute. He is dressed simply, plain white shirt and dark jeans. I really take in how handsome he is. It should be a crime to have such green eyes. They look like emeralds staring back at me. Landon clears his throat, reminding me that I have just been caught staring.
“I’m sorry. Hi, how are you?”
“I’m good now. Where are you headed?”
“I’m just headed home”.
“Want to grab a bite? You know if you aren’t busy.”
Did he just ask me to dinner? I look around confused for a minute.
“I get it, you must have a boyfriend. I’m sorry.” He says a little too fast.
“No, no... I don’t. I just, well you caught me off guard. Dinner sounds good actually.” Did I really just agree to go to dinner with a stranger?
"Great, I know just the place.”
Landon stops outside this cute little cafe, it was just a short walk from my work.
"Is this cool?"
“Yes, this is fine." If I didn't know better, I'd think he was slightly nervous.
I let Landon lead the way to the hostess so I can check out the place. It's cute and chic. I like it already. What I don't like is how the hostess is openly flirting with Landon. I know I have no right, yet I can't help but feel a tinge of jealousy. Before I can process why I feel jealous, Landon looks back at me with a megawatt smile and reaches for my hand. The gesture alone causes me to relax. I smile back.
"Come on Evie. They have a table available.”
I smile and nod allowing him to pull me along. I look away from him and take in my appearance. I’m wearing nothing spectacular, a slightly fitted gray sleeveless dress and black flats. What does he see in me? I shake the negative thoughts as we slide into a booth.
After looking over the menu, I opt for a French dip sandwich and a small house salad. Landon orders lemon glazed salmon with sticky rice and asparagus.
While waiting for our food we make small talk. Landon tells me about himself. His parents died a few years ago in a car accident. He’s an only child. He asks me easy questions. Ones I can answer. I'm glad he doesn't ask anything to personal. I'm not sure I could answer. In fact, I know I couldn’t, not truthfully anyway. I don't know who he is and I'm not about to tell a stranger my secrets.
Our food arrives and we eat in a comfortable silence. I'll admit it's nice to not have to eat alone for once, even if I am a little anxious.
"Penny for your thoughts?" Landon asks.
"Oh... um, it's just nice to have company." I bite my lips nervously and shyly make eye contact with him. His eyes seem to darken and something passes over his face. He says nothing for a minute before speaking.
"I take it you are single then."
Shit. I probably look pathetic now. I smile before responding,
“I am."
"Good." Is the only response Landon gives on the matter and it leaves me on edge. Good? I don't know him, could Chet put him up to this? Suddenly I’m no longer hungry.
"Are you okay Evie?" Landon asks as he reaches out and touches my hand that rests on the table. I instantly pull away, I don't mean to, it's just I'm ruined. Landon raises an eyebrow and waits for me to answer.
“Yes, I'm fine. You startled me."
"I see. Let me grab the bill and we'll get out of here."
I nod my head in return, hoping I didn’t just scare him off.
For the most part dinner was fun. It’s something I haven’t done in so long. I miss going out with my friends, co-workers. It makes me a little sad to think about. Landon was great company even though I felt uneasy. I was able to take the burden I carry daily off, even if for a little bit.
As we walk up to my car, I turn to Landon, “Thank you for tonight. I needed this.”
“You’re welcome. I want to do this again.” He says matter of factly. Before I allow myself to say no I blurt out, “I think I would like that.”
He holds out his hand and asks for my phone. I nervously hand it to him, but once I realize he is just adding his number to my contacts I start to relax. He gives it straight back.
“Good night Evie”. He turns and slowly walks away. I climb into my car, close the door and lock it. I smile, maybe just maybe I can learn to be happy here.
Chapter 3
Landon and I have been chatting a little via text and spoke on the phone last night for the first time. It’s a little weird I’ll admit. It feels foreign almost. Considering I was once a social butterfly in my element, it’s a shame what one vile person has done to me. I hate Chet but enough about him right now. Landon is coming over later and I’d be lying if I said I was not nervous. He’s bringing take out and we are going to watch a movie of his choosing. I told him to surprise me so I’m curious to see what he comes up with. The house is already clean, I just need to keep my mind busy and not overthink things until he arrives.
Landon arrives right at 6 o’clock on the dot. Take out smells amazing as I dish it out on plates. I take my first bite and holy hell it’s delicious.
“Where did you get this take out from? It’s so good.”
“To China and Back.” Landon replies with a sheepish grin and then bursts out laughing.
“You’re joking?”
“Not at all, it’s the best take out around too.”
I haven’t seen this side of Landon, being carefree. He’s always been serious. It’s kind of nice to see this side of him.
The rest of dinner was easy going. I’ve learned that Landon is a website designer and has a very large clientele. He doesn’t like seafood. He still seems a bit closed off. He chose his words carefully before responding to any questions. I didn’t mention my family and he didn’t ask. Sarah and I have been on our own for years. Her being older, took care of me while going to school. I don’t want pity. We did just fine and were successful in life. Well, I was at one time. I spy on her social media occasionally, just to make sure she’s still alive and well. She is and sadly she is still engaged to Chet.
Landon must have noticed I was lost in my thoughts while cleaning up dinner.
“Is everything okay?” he asks.
“Ya, just daydreaming a bit. What movie did you bring?”
“Promise not to laugh?”
I giggle a little, “I promise.”
“I brought Forrest Gump. It’s one of my all time favorites.”
This time I do laugh, “It’s perfect!”
We start the movie and get comfy on the couch. I pull the throw over us. I feel Landon tense next to me but try not to dwell on it. It’s not overly cold. Just a slight chill. About halfway through the movie I feel myself fighting sleep and know it’s not long before I lose the battle.
I wake suddenly. My hands are clammy and my throat aches. Great, I’ve been screaming in my sleep again Oh my God, Landon. I open my eyes and the look on Landon’s face confirms it.
“What was that? Are you okay?” His voice laced with worry. I try to down play, “I’m fine. I must have had a nightmare.” My voice is weak. Great job with the down play. Something flashes in his eyes and I can’t place what it is.
“That was more than a nightmare.”
Shit, so much for him coming over for dinner and a movie. He’ll probably run for the hills after this. I squeeze my eyes shut.
“Really it was
nothing.” He has no clue how many nights I’ve cried myself to sleep or the countless times I have woken up screaming with tears streaming down my face because of the nightmares. I don’t want him to know. He’s only just witnessed this one episode. Maybe I can make something up. Before I can, he calmly says with lips pressed in a tight line,
“Don’t lie to me. I know you are hiding something. I can see it in the way your body is shaking. It’s written all over your face. I want you to let me in Evie”.
“No.” It’s barely a whisper. Landon goes to touch my face and I jump. I don’t mean to. It’s just the last hand to touch me was Chet. I’m broken. He violated me and now I no longer work right.
“I can’t do this, you need to go.” It’s still a whisper but he hears me.
“Don’t do this. I won’t hurt you, just talk to me.”
I sigh. I probably look as bad as I feel. Hoping to distract him, I reach up to grab his neck and pull him towards me. I’m shaking badly now and know it’s not helping me distract him. I try to lean in and kiss him, Landon is quick though. He leans back and pulls my hand free from around his neck.
“No.” He says firmly. His green eyes glare at me, almost piercing through me.
“I want to kiss you. Believe me I do. But not like this. Not when you are using it as an out. I won’t be used. When you are ready to talk, I’ll be waiting.”
With that he stands, gathers his keys and slides on his shoes. Landon doesn’t look back as he walks out my door.
The tears come fast as I slide down on the couch. I curl into a ball and at some point fall back asleep.
Days have gone by since Landon walked out of my condo. No texts, calls, zip. Part of me is relieved and part of me is sad. He was the first person I’ve been able to connect with in months and it looks like I’ve screwed that up. I decide to start laundry and put on my playlist to distract me from myself. Waiting On Superman by Daughtry comes on. The tears come. How do I still have tears left? Was Landon supposed to be my superman? Before I can talk myself out of it, I send him a quick text.
Sorry
A minute later a text comes through.
Nothing to be sorry for
That’s it? He sends nothing else for the rest of the day.
I arrive home Friday evening to find Landon standing at my door with a bouquet of flowers. I don’t know whether to look at the flowers or him. He’s dressed in denim jeans and a plain black tee. His chiseled arms on display for me with his hair a sexy mess.
“Hey you, what are you doing here?” I ask, smiling at him.
I mentally take in what I am wearing. I’m in black dress pants and a deep purple blouse. I’m not wearing much for makeup, just mascara. My hair is pulled into a messy bun that sits on top of my head. A few loose strands frame my face. At least I look decent. I say to myself.
“I’m hoping we can try this again. I can't seem to get you out of my head and don't want to stay away." He says so matter of factly. His words take me by surprise. It’s kinda hot and a little scary at the same time.
“I think I would like that.”
"Good.”
I’m learning he’s not a man of many words. I unlock the door and motion for him to come in. As we make our way inside and I take the flowers from him.
“Thank you for these. They are beautiful.”
“Like you.” He replies.
I can feel my cheeks heat, so I turn to look for a vase or something to stick these flowers in. The condo I’m renting came fully furnished so hopefully there’s a vase here somewhere.
After not finding a vase I opted for a tall glass for the time being.
Landon is just standing at the counter watching me, it's a little intimidating so I try to break the ice.
“So, what have you been up to?” I ask.
“Just working and working out.”
“I didn’t know you worked out, are you one of those gym rats who goes all the time?” I joke.
He laughs a little, “Not really a gym rat, whatever that is. I like to stay in shape and stay healthy.”
With that statement, my thoughts take a turn. What does his body look like under his shirt? I stare at his arms. Can he get any hotter? Suddenly I’m pulled out of my thoughts by him clearing his throat. Damn it I’ve been caught.
“Like what you see?”
Great, I’ve definitely been caught.
“I have no idea what you are talking about.” I put on a sly grin. I can play this game too, I think. He walks around the counter and I glance downward.
“Don’t do that. I want to see your eyes.”
I look back up and look into his eyes. I see something flicker in them, heat, desire maybe.
“Let’s go grab something to eat, my treat.”
“Okay but I’m choosing where.”
“Deal.” He replies before grabbing my hand tightly, pulling me towards the door.
After dinner, Landon takes me back to my place. Walks me to the door, kisses my cheek and says good night. He says nothing else as he walks away. He's so hard to figure out. Once inside, I instantly touch my cheek. I can still feel his lips there. I wonder what his lips would feel like on my lips. When he pulled away I got a slight whiff of his cologne. Woodsy scent and boy did it smell good. Girl, get it together.
What do I do now? I’ve never really dated, I was a workaholic and I didn’t do the serious dating scene. I was dedicated to my career. It’s times like this that make me miss Sarah. She would know what to do and give me the best advice. I decide to hop on social media and peak at her. All seems well in her world. I smile a sad smile and decide to turn in for the night.
Chapter 4
I wake up restless. I had several nightmares last night. I need coffee and a hot shower to wash it all away. I pad out to the kitchen and put on the coffee. I look over at the flowers Landon had brought last night. They are truly beautiful. I decide to text him to see what his plans are for the weekend before I hop in the shower.
Getting out of the shower I check my phone and see a text back saying he was just finishing at the gym and that he’s free for the rest of the day. A day with Landon… this calls for a little makeup and looking nice. I can do this. I continue to get ready with my playlist going and a smile never leaving my face.
Landon knocks just as Kelly Clarkson’s Heartbeat song is ending. Perfect timing. I check myself one more time in the mirror. I opted for a light blue v neck shirt with a pair of jeans and wedges. My dirty blonde hair is styled a little. My makeup is minimal, just a little blush and mascara.
I open the door and he’s standing there in a black short sleeve polo shirt with the top button undone, giving me a little peak at his collarbone and dark jeans. He is stunning. His hair is styled in that just fucked look. I almost want to reach up and run my hands through it.
Stop with these thoughts. I shake my head.
“You look beautiful Evie.”
Landon pulls me from my thoughts. The way he says my name, it gives me goosebumps.
“Thank you. You look pretty good yourself.”
He smiles as he grabs my hand.
We decide to hit the downtown market. It is bustling with vendors and people. The weather is perfect for it too. It’s sunny and if I have to guess I’d say mid 70’s.
We end up stopping at a little walk up cafe just to grab a small bite and some coffee. After gathering our stuff we find a vacant bench to sit down at.
“Are you enjoying yourself today?” Landon asks.
“Yes, It’s beautiful out today.”
“I agree. Just like you. I enjoy being with you.”
Wow. I have no response for what he just said, so I just smile in return. Landon looks at me intently, causing me to blush.
While at the market we decided to grab fresh vegetables to cook with dinner tonight. Once again, I’m nervous. He wants to bring me back to his place to cook for me. I’ve never done something like this since leaving. It feels new and makes me feel alive, yet unsure at
the same time.
We arrive back at his place. Or should I say his house. It’s huge. Landon lives just on the outskirts of town. Close enough to the city life, but far enough away to enjoy the peace and quiet.
He gives me a tour. Everything is modern, yet simple. The rooms are all different shades of gray. He doesn't show me what's on the last door on the right, and I try not to read too much into it. There's not very much on the walls, just a painting here or there. You can tell it’s a man’s home.
Landon brings me back to the living room,
“Make yourself at home, I’m going to start dinner.”
I walk over to the black leather couch and sit down. I watch him walk back to the open kitchen and start pulling stuff out of the fridge. His arms flex and it has suddenly turned me on. How can arms turn someone on? I can feel my face heat. I need to stop and think of something else. I get up and look at the things on his built-in bookshelf. A very large flat screen sits in the middle of the two shelves. There’s loads of books, so many books. I recognize a few titles, which is a little shocking. Who is this Landon? I wonder. There’s a few framed pictures of a couple that I can only assume are his parents. That’s it, nothing else to help me learn anything about him. I glance back at him and he’s watching me. He smiles brightly at me and says nothing before continuing what he’s doing. His smile alone is electrifying and it does nothing to ease the dirty thoughts I currently have of him.
Dinner is delicious. Landon cooked lemon crusted chicken with fresh carrots and parsnips. We opted for sweet tea tonight instead of wine. Landon told me he isn’t a fan of needing alcohol to enjoy the night. I like that about him. He doesn’t sugar coat.
The Secrets We Keep Page 2