by Kaylee, Katy
She offered a small smile before the tears started to slide down her face. I pulled her against me, holding her while she cried on my shoulder. I hated to see her hurting. She was great at her job and had poise and grace. She had a special quality about her, and the camera loved it. I hated that she was being pushed out of the modeling world.
“I’m sorry,” she murmured.
“Hey, don’t be. You cry as much as you want. You were there for me when I thought for sure I was going to drown in those first months. If it hadn’t been for you, I would have fallen into that dark world where models go to get high and OD at a young age. You saved me. You kept me on the right path. I owe you.”
“You would have been just fine. You’re too bullheaded to fall into those dangerous traps,” she managed to get out through her sobs.
I patted her on the back, trying to take away her misery. I had seen so many of the female models I worked with get harassed and ridiculed by their colleagues, photographers, and marketing execs. They were picked apart and generally mind-fucked. I hated watching it. I knew Lydia was suffering. I wanted to beat the shit out of every person who had ever made her feel unworthy.
“You’re going to be okay,” I assured her.
“You’re a good friend,” she said, not letting go of me.
I held her close, my hand moving to the back of her head. I wasn’t great at comforting, but I was doing all I could. Lydia sobbed, her arms hanging at her sides as if she had lost all her fight.
“This doesn’t have to be the end,” I whispered. “You need to keep moving forward. You can do anything you want. I got out. You can too.”
“I’m not like you,” she whined.
“You’re so much better than me. Don’t let them break you down. You are smart and dedicated and you can kick ass at whatever you decide to do.”
She sniffled. “You’re just saying that.”
“I am not. You know you’re smart.”
The door opened. I turned to face her, Lydia still in my arms. Penny walked through the door, looking down at her tablet. “I negotiated a deal with—”
She stopped talking and looked at my embrace with Lydia. The look on her face said it all. It was anger and shock rolled up in one. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had a visitor,” Penny said and quickly rushed out as fast as she had come in.
She left so fast, slamming the door behind her, I didn’t get a chance to explain what it was she saw. I knew what she was thinking. She believed I had lied when I told her Lydia and I weren’t like that. I didn’t have a chance to explain that our friendship was nothing more but tabloid fodder. Neither Lydia nor I dispelled the rumors. We let them fly. It made it easier for us. If people thought we were off the market, they tended to stay away. At least some of them did. Not all, but most.
“Son of a bitch. Shit. Fuck. Goddammit,” I cursed.
Lydia pulled away and looked up at me. “What’s going on? What just happened?” she asked, looking toward the door and then back at me.
“That was Penny,” I mumbled.
Lydia wiped her cheeks with her fingers, her eyes wide. “Penny? Like the Penny from college? Penny, Penny?” she asked with complete shock.
I nodded. “Yes.”
Lydia knew all about my history with Penny and what had happened. “Oh my god. She works for you?” she shrieked.
I nodded again. “Yes. Penny works for me. I didn’t intentionally hire her. I didn’t even know she’d been hired until she walked into my office.”
“Did she know you were the owner of the company?” she asked, a quizzical expression on her face.
I shook my head. “Apparently not. The first time we laid eyes on each other, it was obvious neither of us expected to see each other again.”
“Wow. I thought I had problems. As usual, Jax has to go and one-up me.”
“This wasn’t my fault,” I protested.
“I think it is. If you wouldn’t have done what you did back then, it wouldn’t still be haunting you now,” she said with a shrug.
“That’s not very supportive. I was just comforting you. You should return the favor,” I pouted.
She scoffed. “Um, you told me what you did. You’re lucky Penny is obviously a much kinder person than I am. I would have haunted you, hunted you down, and made you pay.”
“Made me pay?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“You wound me,” I said, feigning a heart attack by slapping my hands over my chest.
She punched me in the shoulder. “If you would have done me like you did her, I would have wounded you by removing that appendage between your legs.”
“Hey!” I protested. “That isn’t funny. You can’t joke about things like that.”
“Who said I was joking?” she shot back.
“You’re a vicious woman, Lydia.”
She shrugged a shoulder, sitting down in the chair and crossing her long legs as she looked up at me with a mischievous smile. “I may not have actually cut the thing off, but I would have told everyone I could that I had. No, I would have told everyone you had a pencil dick.”
My mouth dropped open. “That’s horrible!”
“Is it?”
“You’re mean.”
“Hey, I’m just happy your life is more of a mess than mine,” she said with a grin.
I rolled my eyes, flopping down in my chair. “Thanks. I’m glad I can make you feel better by having the more fucked-up life.”
She got up from her chair and walked to me, leaning over and giving me a hug before kissing the top of my head. “I appreciate that. Don’t screw up a second time. The half second I saw her, I can see why you are into her. She’s very pretty.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”
She giggled. “I’m not saying I’m confident. I’m saying, try not to screw it up this time. You don’t often get a second chance at anything.”
“Are you leaving?” I asked, watching her walk to the door.
“I am. I just got into town late last night. I’m going to go by and see my folks, and then I have a video conference call with my agent to see if I’m officially washed-up.”
“You’re not washed-up. You hold your head high and let them know who the real queen is,” I told her.
She smiled at me and waved. “Thanks, Jax. I’ll see you around.”
I watched her leave, already knowing what Penny must be thinking. I loved seeing Lydia, but her visit couldn’t have come at a worse time. Penny was probably packing her shit up and putting in her notice. I couldn’t seem to take a right step with that one. It was one mistake after another.
12
Penny
I sipped the glass of wine I was treating myself to while I worked. I was off the clock, even if I was working. I hated Jax, but I wanted to give the best marketing proposal possible. If anything, it would build my resume for when it was time to move on. I knew my job with Jax wasn’t going to be long-term. I needed to work my butt off now so I could have something to show a future employer. I had to make the campaign work. It was my ticket away from Jax.
I had to get away from him. I was ashamed of myself. I was the other woman. I had seen the way he’d been holding that woman. Not that woman—Lydia, his girlfriend. His girlfriend of years. He’d cheated on her with me. I couldn’t believe I had done that to another woman. I couldn’t even pretend not to know he was in a relationship. I did know. He’d made it sound like they were in an open relationship, but that didn’t make it right. I was not that kind of girl.
I was knee-deep in my self-loathing when there was a knock at the door. I got up, assuming it was Carolina. She was the only person who knew where I lived, although I was sure Jax could get the information if he wanted it. If it was him, I would absolutely send him packing with a very stern lecture about cheating on his girlfriend. That was not okay.
“Chance?” I gasped when I looked through the peephole.
I yanked open the door and threw myself at him. �
��Nice to see you too,” he laughed.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“I came to check on you. You haven’t been home in a couple months. I was worried.”
I pulled him inside my apartment and closed the door. “I haven’t been home because I don’t live at home. I live here. I won’t be home for dinner. I thought that was understood.”
“Stop, you know what I mean,” he said, ruffling my hair like he had done since I was a little girl.
It was only then I realized he was carrying a duffel bag. “What’s that?” I asked.
“That is called a bag,” he said sarcastically, dropping it on the floor next to the door.
“Ha. Ha. You know what I mean. What are you really doing here?” I asked him, suspicious he’d found out what I had been up to and was coming to babysit me.
“I’m staying for a couple days,” he announced.
“Here?” I asked, my voice a little higher than usual.
“Yes, is that okay? Are you kicking out your brother?” he teased.
“No, of course not. It’s just, I don’t have a guest room, but you’re welcome to my couch. What are you doing here? For real. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m doing fine.”
“It’s not about you. Sheesh, always making it about you,” he said.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to make it about me, but your visit is a little unexpected. Are you okay? Are you in trouble?”
He rolled his eyes. “Do I ever get in trouble?” he winked, his gray eyes sparkling.
“Oh god. I don’t have bail money,” I said, only half-joking.
When we had been younger, Chance used to get himself in all kinds of trouble. When our dad walked out and our mother kind of checked out, it had been Chance who took care of me, made sure I went to school and always looked after me. It helped straighten him out, but he did still have a tendency to find trouble.
“I have a meeting with investors,” he said with a grin.
“Investors?”
He grabbed the bottle of wine I had sitting on the counter and took a drink straight from the bottle. “Yep.”
I scowled at him. “Gross. Pig. Didn’t anyone ever teach you to use a glass?”
He grinned, putting the bottle down and using the back of his hand to wipe his mouth. “I am finally getting my designs ready to go to production. After all this time, I’m so close! The investors are interested in backing me. I have a portfolio full of designs. I’m hoping they are impressed enough to give me their money.”
I slapped him on the shoulder. “That is awesome! I’m so proud of you! I didn’t know you were still pursuing that.”
“Thanks. I’ve never really let it go. I’ve been derailed a time or ten, but I couldn’t give up.”
“Because you’re tenacious and you deserve this.”
His boyish smile and tousled dark hair reminded me of our younger years. He’d always been handsome in my eyes, and the ladies loved him. He and Jax together were quite the eye candy. “It’s taken me almost ten years to get to this point. I’ve never been able to get anyone to give me the time of day. I’ve been rejected so much I just expect it. When I presented my latest ideas and got not one, but several responses, I thought someone was playing a joke on me. I have a couple meetings with a couple different investment firms. I am hoping this is finally my chance to get my athletic shoes on the market. I know they’ll make a difference,” he said enthusiastically. “I’m going to revolutionize athletic shoes. I’m going to have every professional athlete wanting my shoes.”
I burst into laughter. “Dream big or go home,” I said.
“Damn straight. I’m not going to settle, not anymore. I’ve waited and I’ve paid my dues. It’s my turn. I’m going to get to the top. I’m going to be able to buy you a big fancy house and a new car,” he said.
I smiled, happy his dream was coming true. He always thought about me. I had told him a million times I could do it on my own, but he never listened. He always sent me a little money to help, even though I told him I didn’t need it. He sacrificed so much for me. I owed him everything.
He’d first tossed out the idea of launching his own athletic shoe company when he struggled to find a pair of shoes that were what he wanted for basketball. He and Jax had cooked up the plan to start their company after Jax finished college. Then that night happened, and the poop had hit the fan. Everything had fallen apart. I had felt terribly guilty for years. I still did. My choice had stolen Chance’s future and his best friend. Chance had been left without a best friend and a dream. With Jax kicked out of our lives, Chance’s dream of building a company with a guy he had trusted evaporated. It had left him jaded. He’d been angry with me, even if he never said it. I knew he was, and I didn’t blame him. My silly need to lose my virginity had cost a lot more than the V-card.
“You’re amazing. Perseverance always pays off,” I told him.
“Do you have anything decent to drink?” he asked, walking to my refrigerator.
He stopped, not moving for several seconds before he slowly turned around, looking down at the table where I had the campaign sketches spread out on the table. He picked up one of them, the look on his face making me cringe. I saw the anger and betrayal he still felt. I loved my big brother, and I loved that he’d defended me. I hated being the person who had essentially caused that suffering.
“Chance,” I whispered, knowing there was little I could say to ease the blow.
“What the hell is this?” he asked in a low voice, holding up one of the printouts. Jax’s face was very prominent.
“That’s an ad I’m working on,” I replied.
He nodded his head. “That’s Jax.”
“Yes.”
“Penny, what the hell?”
I bit my bottom lip. I had hoped I would never have to tell him I was working with Jax. I knew it was probably inevitable he would find out, but I liked to fool myself into believing he wouldn’t. “I told you I landed a job.”
He nodded. “Yes, you did. This—this is your job?” he asked, waving the paper.
I grimaced. “Yes. I’m the head of marketing at Jax’s new company. I’m designing ads for his new line.”
He dropped the sketch on the table, his hands going to his hips as he stared at me. I could see the disappointment and felt about an inch tall. “You’re working for Jax. You’re helping him make millions after what happened. What the hell is wrong with you? Why would you ever apply to his job? Why would you work for the man who made you the laughingstock on campus?”
I flinched, the memory bubbling to the surface, bringing the old, repressed feelings back along with it. I wanted to cringe, curl inward to protect myself from the misery. I’d been so embarrassed and devastated by what he had done to me.
I flopped down in one of the dining chairs and buried my face in my hands. “It wasn’t like that. I didn’t know it was his company when I applied. I didn’t interview with him. I was hired by the hiring manager and never, ever met Jax. When I showed up to my first day on the job, I was introduced to him.”
“Then why didn’t you turn around and walk out?”
I shrugged. “Because, the job was good. It pays well and I had put out a hundred resumes and no one was calling me back. I’m fresh out of school. None of the big companies are going to hire someone like me. I need the experience. Jax and his people were the only ones who were willing to give me a shot,” I explained.
He slapped his hand on the table, spinning around and yanking open my fridge. Thankfully, I had a couple of beers in there. I would have run out and bought him some, just to make up for the situation. I felt horrible. It was a bad upon bad disaster. I knew I should have walked away from the job. Money wasn’t worth the fallout. I wasn’t about to tell Chance about my little dalliance with Jax. He would probably drag me back home and lock me in my room.
“Penny, this guy screwed you over so badly you had to change schools. You had to move away because you couldn’t deal with
the rumors he started,” he reminded me.
“You don’t have to tell me. I lived it. I know what he did.”
“Then why? Why would you help him get ahead? Why help him get rich?” he asked.
I groaned. “I need the job. I don’t have to see him all the time. I do my job and rarely see him.”
He shook his head. “You know him. You know how he operates. He’ll try and seduce you again. He’ll use that charming way of his to make you fall for him again.”
I gulped down the guilt I felt. “I won’t. I just have to get this campaign done. I need to have something to prove to other companies I know what I’m doing. I need something to add to my resume. I can put up with him long enough to get the experience I need to get my foot in the door somewhere else.”
Chance pulled out one of the chairs and sat down. “Penny, you know him. Working for him, seeing him, it’s dangerous. It’s like waving a red flag in front of a bull. It’s too risky.”
“I know what I’m doing Chance. You have to trust me. I’m not the same naïve little girl I was back then. I’m much wiser. I have to do this,” I insisted.
He took a long drink from the can of beer in his hand. It was pretty clear he didn’t believe me, probably because I didn’t believe myself. I wasn’t immune to Jax’s charms, at least not as much as I wished I was. Chance didn’t need to know that.
13
Jax
I walked out of the conference room of the Grace Investments Group feeling very confident in a job well done. I had presented a very good pitch, and I was sure I had impressed the hell out of the guys holding the strings to a very big purse. I didn’t technically need the infusion of cash from an outside investor, but it was going to help make sure my launch was successful. It would allow me to keep the lights on and the doors of the overpriced set of offices I was leasing open. I wasn’t too worried they would deny my request for a small investment of capital. The marketing campaign Penny had put together along with the products themselves were all excellent. It looked like success. The extra cash in the coffers would make for a smooth launch. I’d be able to cover any unexpected expenses without disrupting business or causing me stress.