“The sword did.”
“Only because Roisin was holding it. Their spells don’t work against us, for the most part. When they killed my parents, it took all fifty of them to overpower us enough to even get near them.”
“I don’t feel drugged now, not like I did on the plane over here,” she said. “But I do feel spacey, like I’m a little removed from reality.”
“That’s probably just the after-effects.” He sighed. “I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to put up with me being in your space for a few more days. It wouldn’t be safe to leave you alone right now.”
“I don’t want to be alone anyway.”
“Let’s get out of here.” He stepped back but didn’t let go of her. He put one arm around her, tugging her forward, while he took Declan by the other hand. The three of them walked to the witches’ SUV.
When they got to it, Kellan inspected it inside and out to look for any traces of witchcraft. “It seems clean. I think we’ll be fine to drive it to Dublin.”
They all got inside, and Declan stretched out over the backseat. “It’s about three hours to Dublin. The witches never go into cities.” He paused. “Well. I guess I can’t say that any longer, since one of the Scottish witches showed up in the lecture hall during the conference.”
Clara sat up straighter and turned toward him.“What?”
“Yes. One of their cohort, a Scottish witch, showed up on the first night of the Clean Energy Conference. I should have grabbed you and Declan then, and gotten you the hell out of Scotland. I’m sorry. I hope one day you can forgive me for burying my head in the sand.”
“It’s okay. I can forgive you for that, because I know you wouldn’t have allowed Declan to be in danger for a second if you’d thought she was a threat.” She turned back to stare out the window at the rolling green hills. “There’s also the part where you couldn't tell me that a witch showed up in your conference. Because you neglected to tell me that witches are real. Or that you can turn into a dragon.”
“Clara. I really am sorry.”
She glanced in the backseat. She had a feeling Declan wasn’t as asleep as he pretended to be, and she didn’t want him worrying, or thinking she wasn’t going to be his nanny anymore. No matter how crazy the day had been, or what Kellan had or hadn’t done, she wasn’t going to leave this little boy behind. “We can talk about it later.”
It was too much, and too big to discuss right then. She didn’t want to be angry with Kellan right then either, right after he’d been through so much.
He pressed his lips together and nodded.
For three hours, Kellan drove through the Irish countryside, and during some of that time, Clara slept, dozing off with her face against the window. But when she managed to rouse herself, she made a point of looking at each landmark, from the impressive castles to the charming little towns, to the fluffy sheep that dotted the fields along the road. Just in case she never got to come back here.
She wasn’t sure if Kellan would ever want to come back either. His devotion to his home was obvious, but she was certain the past had left deep scars, scars which this trip would have reopened all over again.
When they reached the town of Athlone, Kellan called and made a reservation for them to stay in a small house on the coast near Portmarnock Beach.
From the backseat, Declan’s ears perked up. “We’re going to the beach?”
Kellan glanced in the rearview mirror. “Yes. But it’s not going to be a beach like you’re used to visiting.”
“Not like Clearwater Beach?”
“No, nothing like Florida. In Florida, the sand is white and sparkling, and soft. And the ocean is warm with nice sized waves. The sand here will be grittier, and tan-colored, and the water will be colder, with flatter waves. It’s going to look more like the lakes we’ve visited than a beach. But it’s still nice to see.”
Declan’s hands wrapped around their headrests. “Sounds fun to me. I can swim in cold water.” He shook the seats with his arms, bobbing back and forth. “Miss Clara, do you like the beach?”
“I love it. I’ve only been to Miami, so this will be fun for me, to see something different.”
Soon enough, they reached the coast, and pulled up to the small cottage that Kellan had rented
“Is this it?” Clara asked in wonder. The cottage was traditional, with a white exterior and a thatched roof. It even had a cobblestone path that led to a bright red door.
“I was hoping you’d like it,” Kellan said. “I thought you might want to see something local, instead of a sleek modern hotel.”
“It’s perfect. Just like something out of a storybook.” Clara pushed open the short wooden gate while Declan jumped over the small fence.
“I don’t have any luggage,” she said. “Not even a toothbrush.”
Kellan looked a little sheepish. “While you were asleep I called a personal shopper from one of the hotels and asked her to buy us both a few things. I hope that wasn’t too forward of me.”
“No, I appreciate it. I really want to brush my teeth soon. And a bath would be nice.”
The door had been updated with an electronic keypad, and Kellan typed in the code. Once they were inside, he opened a bag that sat right inside the door. “Oh, good. These are the items I ordered.”
“Dad, can we go to the beach?” Declan asked. “Please?”
“I think you’ve earned it.”
“Miss Clara? Will you come too?”
Clara thought back to the moment this little boy asked if she’d be his mother, and she’d had to tell him no. Clara bent down in front of him. “Yes. I’d love to take you to the beach.” She wrapped her arms around him, then leaned back and kissed his forehead. “Thank you. You saved my life today. It was scary, but you were so brave, and so tough, and so smart – you knew just what to do.”
Declan’s face broke into a big grin.
Kellan’s hand came to rest on Declan’s head, where he ruffled his thick mop of hair. “Clara’s right. You were amazing today. And as soon as we’re settled on the beach, I’d like to hear the details of your adventure.”
“Yeah, Dad! I’ll tell you!”
While Declan danced around the room, Clara brushed her teeth and changed into one of the outfits the personal shopper had left, and they all walked down the trail to the beach.
The sun had set by the time they left the cottage, but the moon was bright. While Declan skipped in the foaming surf, he and Clara took turns recounting the details of their day for Kellan, starting with the botanical garden.
She was struck again at how much she was giving up by moving out of his home. When she moved out, there’d be no more dinners together. No more Saturdays at the museum, and no more late-night swims. And she wouldn’t be sleeping in his bed anymore either. No more putting her hands on his hot body, or kissing his gorgeous face.
Even if she wanted him back, would he have her? And how did the shifter part fit in? Could she accept that the man she loved was not human?
19
Kellan
As Declan chattered and moved from skipping to hopping into waves, Kellan felt the weight of the day come crashing down on him. This was the first time he’d stopped since walking into the hotel room that morning and finding out that Declan and Clara had been abducted.
It didn’t seem possible that had only been ten hours ago.
In those ten hours, he’d found out his son was kidnapped, he’d chased his mortal enemy back to the home he’d been gone from for thirteen years, and then he killed someone.
The witch had been threatening his life, but still. A violent shifter was never who he wanted to be. Skilled, yes. Brave, yes. But never violent.
“Are you okay? Is your back hurting?” Clara’s brows drew together. “Could you possibly have internal bleeding? Should we go to the Emergency Department?”
“No. I’m fine,” he said. She knew so little about shifters, and that was all his fault. “I was just thinking how I’m back
home, but it didn’t happen the way I pictured it.”
“How did you picture it?”
“I envisioned me and my brothers having a solid plan, and making a decision to come back here. A deliberate decision to face the witches.”
“I still don’t know the whole story. I only know what Eithne told me on the plane.”
Kellan stopped walking. He called her the love of his life, but he’d really fucked this up. There were no words to express how sorry he was, but he’d keep trying. “I am so sorry. Again. I should have told you the truth about my being a dragon after we started sleeping together-”
“Still not ready to talk about it,” Clara said.
A huffing sound escaped his mouth without his permission. “I should never have brought you and Declan to Scotland. It was stupid and selfish.”
“Why did you bring us?” she asked.
“I fooled myself into thinking you’d be safe.”
She linked her arm through his. He didn’t pull away, but stepped closer. Was she warming up to him, or did he sound so forlorn and broken that she felt sorry for him? “Did you think there was any risk?” she asked.
“No. Not really. The entire time I knew the witches, for the first seventeen years of my life, they only ventured into rural areas. They never went into cities. They said they were able to hear and feel all of the human emotions, pushing at their minds. They said it was like needles in their brain.”
“So why now?”
“They claimed they’d gained the ability to control the intrusion of human thoughts. I didn’t know that, because I was in Texas.” He sighed. “My brothers and I are the last dragon shifters from the Cliffs of Moher. My parents were the leaders of our clan. And when they were killed, we left.”
“You said you were seventeen. You couldn't have done anything else.”
Her empathy always amazed him. “So we came to Texas. We became American. And we always said we’d come back, and take over our rightful land. But then Declan was born, and we were committed to raising him. We always said we’d come back when he was grown. But I’m not sure we would have.”
“You four have great lives. You all love Declan. You’re not doing anything wrong.”
“I know. And I even agree, for the most part. But my clan protected the Cliffs of Moher for centuries. It doesn’t feel right to abandon it.”
“Well, you still have time before Declan’s grown to decide,” she said.
“You’re right.”
“You don’t sound happy about that.”
“I don’t know that I can ever avenge my parents, or take our land back, not if it’s by force,” Kellan sighed. “The dragon shifters were a peaceful clan. I was trained to fight just in case, but it’s not what I want. The pact said we’d protect the witches, and never harm them. But in turn, they couldn’t harm humans. They got angry at the humans that were settling near our land, and they killed some. My parents objected strongly. And then the battle started.”
“So, you think coming back would involve more violence?”
“I don’t think I could avoid it.”
“You killed that witch today. Roisin,” Clara said.
“Yes.”
“And it bothers you.”
He found it easier to admit this to her. He couldn’t imagine being this truthful with his brothers, not about his feelings anyway. “Quite a bit, yes.”
“Do you regret it?” she asked.
“No. They’d already threatened to keep you and Declan hostage until I did what they wanted. And then she tried to kill me. So I wouldn't trust them not to try again. It had to be done.”
“I know it’s easy for me to say, but you had no choice. You did the right thing. You saved Declan.” Clara stopped in front of him. She looked around until she saw Declan throwing a stick into the water. “Roisin, the one you killed, threatened to kill me if he didn’t do what she wanted. I didn’t hear Declan tell you that part of the story just now. But she did. She was very explicit, and the threat was made to him.”
His eyes closed. His stomach churned.
God, what did Clara and Declan go through, just the two of them? He’d have to get the full story from Clara when she felt up to it, without Declan around. When Declan had led the story, it had been meandering, filled with details that only a five-year-old would find important, but he’d left out the part where Roisin threatened to kill his nanny.
Was that because his son was so overwhelmed with trauma? Or because he hadn’t processed it yet? Or maybe it was simply more than his son could bear to speak of.
There weren’t any child therapists or experts that Kellan could take Declan to see back in Texas, but he’d make sure he filled his brothers in so they could try to get Declan talking to them. Quinn was the doctor, so he’d know a little, but it was Liam who was always the best listener.
“Thank you.” He swallowed hard. “For telling me. I can’t imagine how scared you both must have been.”
“Yes. We were. But Declan knew what was going on. I didn’t.”
Kellan winced. She was right.
“I’m not even mad that you didn’t tell me, because I get that. Everyone has the right to their privacy. I understand concealing your identity to keep yourself safe – I had to do the same thing when I left my ex.”
“I still should have told you.”
“Yes. You should have. Maybe not right away. But you sent me out with your son, over and over, and I wasn’t prepared for looking out for him, because I didn’t have all the facts.” She put her hand on his chest. “Declan really took on a lot of the responsibility himself. He had to. Because for the first few hours we were with the witches, I thought I’d been drugged, and that I was hallucinating.”
Shame rolled through his body. He’d really failed her. Terribly. And he’d failed his son.
“And that’s why I’m upset,” she said. “Not because you’re a shifter. Not because you didn’t tell me everything. But because I had no warning.”
“You’re right to be upset. I don’t have any excuses. None at all.” He held out his hand, hoping fervently that she’d take it. And she did. “I wish I handled things differently. If I trust you with my son, then I should have trusted you with this. You might have thought I was crazy, but you’d have been prepared, in a much different way.”
“Don’t beat yourself up too much. You’ve had a rough day.”
“You’re very kind,” he said. “I can’t promise I won’t screw up again, but I can promise to do better.”
“That’s good enough for me,” she said.
He drew in a deep breath. “Would you be willing to stay on as Declan’s nanny?”
“Yes. I don’t think you could get rid of me if you tried.”
Relief surged through his body. “Thank you.”
She poked him in the arm. “I’m doing it for him, not for you.”
He was well aware of that fact, but it didn’t faze him one bit. Maybe in time, he could win her heart back and prove to her that a relationship with him was worth her while.
20
Clara
Of course Declan wasn’t ready to go in, but Kellan and Clara were about to pass out from exhaustion. Kellan scooped him up and draped him over his shoulder, while Declan screeched and wiggled.
Just hours ago, she wasn’t sure she’d ever get to see this happy father and son duo play together again. She'd been terrified that the witches would keep them captive somehow, and that she’d be dead.
That interaction, the one right in front of her, was enough to convince her. It didn’t matter that they were dragon shifters, or that Kellan hadn’t given her the whole story. Kellan adored his child, and he cared about Clara, and that was enough.
That was more than enough – it was everything. And he’d apologized to her, sincerely, and admitted where he’d gone wrong.
Clara wanted him back. She just had to find a way to let him know without sending them back to square one.
Back inside
the cottage, Kellan got Declan tucked into bed, and then he came to tell her goodnight. He hesitated, awkward in a way that she’d never seen him before. “I hope you sleep well,” he said.
She gave him a small smile. “You too.”
But he didn’t leave the room. He lingered in the doorway, still staring at her. “You look nice.”
She looked down at her navy-blue silk nightgown. He must have noticed how often she chose navy-blue clothing. She’d always thought navy-blue and white looked good with her skin tone and her red hair, but she’d never expected Kellan to notice that.
“At the risk of repeating myself, I want to say again how much I appreciate you looking after Declan so well. You’ve been better for him than his own mother. Since he doesn’t have a mom or a grandmother, and none of my brothers are married, I worried about him not having a female role model.”
“He has me, for as long as he wants me.” She meant that. Whatever happened between Clara and Kellan, she would not allow Declan to suffer for it.
He stepped forward and reached out with just his arm, keeping his body far away from her. He patted her shoulder stiffly. “Thank you again. And I wanted to apologize. Again.”
“I forgive you,” she said. And she meant that too. She wasn’t saying it just to appease him, or give him empty reassurances. She forgave him. She understood the reasons behind the choices he’d made, whether she liked them or not.
Kellan’s blue eyes warmed, and grew just the tiniest bit damp. He stepped toward her, with the tiniest smile on his handsome face. He crossed his arms, and his well-defined biceps stretched against the sleeves of his plain cotton t-shirt.
Even after all this, she could look at him all day. His muscular arms, his defined abs that showed even through his shirt, and his delicious pecs. It had been far too long since she’d touched his body.
With her hands up, she stepped forward until she could rest her palms against the firm muscles in his arms. Now she was right up in his space, but he didn’t back away. She could smell the faintest scent of his cologne. She tilted her chin up. Does he want to kiss me? Why doesn’t he say so?
Billionaire Dragon's Nanny (Irish Dragon Shifter Brothers Book 1) Page 10