The Predicament of Redwood Paddock

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by Hylton Smith


  Chapter 36

  A New Era

  The local elections had been shaped in part by the ‘heroics’ of IR, insofar as they had shown what could be achieved by dedicated individuals and popular support for clear policy. Unfortunately, it had also been tarnished by the perception that as soon as this delicate flower had come into bud it was prematurely pruned. Whether this was to suffocate any trend developing, or simply to suck promising individuals into the desiccated world of ‘black hole central,’ it mattered little. The overwhelming swing was away from the main parties with their constipated absorption of change. The obvious beneficiaries were the transparent ones, where promises were ‘guaranteed’ to be kept. This appeared to be a repetitive trend, and it pushed this local/national agenda to the fore.

  ***

  Tarquin was not feeling as honoured as he might have been to meet Ruby Bickerstacks, and she added to that by lecturing him about loyalty. She proceeded to urge him to accept the chance to assist IR by taking his advice and resigning his party membership. The neutrality would be perfect cover for sabotage. De Vere saw a reflection of himself, and his previous antics with the Holo-matrix. He was ashamed that he had been just as bad as she sounded right now. Was he really going to make this career-ending sacrifice for what was being paraded as a noble cause?

  Compared to IR’s cause, this was a no go. Sadly, it was also part of the game for all parties, or more accurately, some individuals, who discredited the parties. He decided to accept her suggestion and vowed to himself that he would help IR, his traditional adversary, by feeding plausible disinformation to Ruby.

  “I assume you want this to remain verbal and for our ears only, Ma’am?”

  “Good, thank you Tarquin, there will be a time of reward and you deserve it.”

  He contrived an expression of gratitude. ‘So will you Bickerstacks, to be known in future as the black widow, who stung herself,’ he mused. This light-hearted thought enabled him to depart with a genuine winning smile.

  ***

  Not surprising then that the BNP gained in popularity, a bit of an eyebrow-raiser that they captured a majority of council seats in the country, and an astonishing result that they succeeded in both Redwood Paddock and Hell’s Hill.

  ***

  Oh yes, and the paperweight evidence finally consigned Uranus Ormine to a custodial sentence. Although IR had weighed up his decision very carefully and concluded he could help more citizens in his new role, he was only now feeling the real pangs of guilt in moving away from his friends and colleagues. He would return of course in his new remit, but it could never be quite the same.

  ***

  When Nakatolli Shogun arrived he had more excess baggage than normal baggage. Contingency planning was paramount. Although the operator was still reeling at the outcome of recent events, it was realised that the phenomenal increase in user participation of the Holo-matrix was key in getting even more awareness of the need for change. The power that the voters had in their collective grip was waiting to be galvanised into action. Nakatolli was a genius, and his modifications clearly illustrated what his gift could do in the wrong hands. He had slightly underestimated the power requirement, but that was where the excess baggage came into play. He was able to bring the original programming ‘into the 21st century’ and recover substantial momentum to achieve the targets set by the operator. He also suggested that a buffer should be programmed to prompt which data from users was to be re- routed to remote storage and which was to be deleted. If this was attended to on a weekly basis it would delay any system expansion until the user levels were above even the greatest aspirations of the operator.

  The fact that the humour chip now worked well seemed little consolation when Enoch came back on line. In spite of all this glittering technical achievement there was nothing in his programme for him to reconcile what kind of blackout he had suffered, or appreciation of how one minute he was speaking with Richardson, and the next there was a new council leader, IR was gone. Perhaps an emotion chip would have been better.

  ***

  Wishbone had already suspected that the local elections would deliver a backlash to his party, but he was flabbergasted at the extent of it. He was also surprised that it affected all of the other major parties just as badly. He wasn’t surprised at the support for the BNP, and congratulated himself for holding back the EU referendum, and the inaugural installation of IR to achieve maximum impact at the national election. This was his master card and he needed to get on with Regional Government Secretary Richardson’s rollout to the public. He was however, failing to take account of one facet of citizens’ characteristics.

  Redwood Paddock was proud that one of their own was being perceived as a force for good in all constituencies, a bit like a local young footballer representing his country. Judgement would also ratchet up accordingly.

  ***

  Otto made the elementary error of telling the Owl of his intentions without doing any research, a trait in which common sense is seen as something which never changes. It was a curious paradox that he was elected without being popular - or was it? He hadn’t given this any thought. The language of the implied is easily misread if it passes unchecked through airhead space, by-passing scrutiny.

  “We’ll be mothballing this facility. I just wanted to say thanks for the part you played in the journey to the new order.”

  “A little premature methinks,” scowled Enoch, “your hasty evaluation makes me certain you have not consulted the citizens you are now pretending to represent.”

  “What’s to evaluate? Purge is the new evaluate.”

  “Yes I see. Well if I ever have the misfortune to clap eyes on you again, I will know you were wrong, a bit of a mixed blessing really.” Enoch would have felt proud of his sense of humour if only he had an emotion chip.

  ***

  De Vere was having trouble just assessing the recent sequence of highs and lows, let alone coming to terms with them. The overriding emotion was one of questioning if it was all worth it, not typical of this self-confident, bombastic opportunist. He called IR to congratulate him and was intrigued by Richardson confiding in him concerning a proposal he had decided to put to the PM. Tarquin had a sudden urge to renew contact with the Owl.

  “Greetings De Vere, I must say the sweeping changes almost made me forget our little jousts. Tell me, can a hologram forget? Although there is no point as I am to be componentised and enter the Valhalla of nothingness”

  “You didn’t previously mutter on like this Enoch, however I can imagine your syntax buffer is glowing at the thought of a software grim reaper paying a visit. Where did this idea come from?”

  “The BNP Councillor, so I can only expect it to be swift. This may be our last conversation Tarquin, so let it be meaningful.”

  De Vere strangely felt very, very angry. As much at his own antics in trying to eavesdrop on the Owl’s activities as Otto’s bull-headed declaration. Then he thought….on what grounds or authority did Otto Nostalgia feel the Council could take this unilateral decision?

  He told Enoch that he had good information that someone (and it was probably Otto) had been trying to access the Owl’s sessions with other party members. Redwood Paddock’s very own Holo-gate. He went on to add that it would be difficult to prove such a despicable act, but the suspicion might be enough for citizens to demand the Holo-matrix remained intact, so that Otto didn’t get the chance to delete any evidence which could be damaging to the BNP. De Vere actually thought or believed that shedding a dim light on the snooping episodes wiped the slate clean of his own misdemeanours. This pseudo-altruism gave him new energy to get back on track. That track being ‘destiny is the true reward.’

  It stirred up a hornet’s nest of antagonism to Otto’s proposal and even more toward him personally. The speed with which he dropped the idea seemed to confer more guilt. He had a lot to learn in a short time.

  Chapter 37

  IR wanted the PM to consider his proposal before the
re was too much fanfare. Basically he believed that the task would gain more credibility if it was outside party influence, as with permanent secretaries, who were non-elected civil servants. The mission could survive beyond any change of government.

  “Mmmm…..I see,” cringed Wishbone, seeing only too well. “But where will the momentum come from, if not the party?”

  “It’s my view that momentum generation should be the least of our concerns. If the question was ‘how do we lower expectation?’ I’d be a little uneasy, unless of course the whole exercise was just PR. Keeping control of the tide will be the province of the prevailing party. Control means dovetailing with existing policy-making procedure.”

  This is both advantageous and threatening thought Will Standin-Line (he was trying to shed his nickname, feeling it was inappropriate for a PM). He judged the short term to be the priority because if they weren’t re-elected it was irrelevant to his own future. Live in the ‘now’ was his conclusion. If he had to reel in the project in future it was because he still enjoyed power. Obvious really, and just as obvious, was the uphill battle of the general election.

  “I know that there will be trouble with some of the Cabinet on this, but in principle I can visualise your neutral position being helpful, in view of our fragile majority. I would further propose that until the infant has come off the breast, tottered through adolescence, and gained accreditation as a balanced means of generating change, you report direct to me. This is irregular but so is the project.”

  “I’ll wait to hear from you PM.”

  “That will be soon, as soon as I can acquaint the Cabinet and the Administrative Office of the rudiments of what we have developed so far.”

  ***

  Ever since he testified, Malcolm G had been threatened by sidekicks of the frog and JJJ. Several times he reported this to law enforcement and all they did was record it. He felt really angry, and knew that if he had reported some individual who had made remarks about his origin or religion, they would have been investigated. So here we are again. An honest citizen who risks his own safety testifying at the request of the law enforcement ‘clan,’ to correct an injustice inflicted on another honest citizen defending his domain, is now denied protection from the same clan. It isn’t difficult to conclude that getting the crime numbers to hit targets (a complete nonsense in itself) is more important to these clans than tackling the tougher aspects of crime. Further persuasion to this view is provided by the health and safety edicts preventing officers endangering themselves. It will logically extend to the armed forces being confined to barracks permanently, lest they get hurt. All part of the pretend world we live in.

  On explaining this bizarre situation to Enrico, a different solution was explored. He would accompany Mal G to the Joint, with his camera. He had also arranged back-up in the form of a colleague who specialised in persuading thugs to lose interest in the threats they had made, by describing what may become of them if they didn’t.

  This was very effective in creating the necessary level of fear, but as predicted by Enrico, when the thugs reported it to the law detachment clan, it would be investigated, but simultaneously with footage from an anonymous source. Footage of those reporting the affray using drugs at the same establishment on the same night. Some searching questions would then be the order of the day.

  Rather a convoluted way of ensuring the avid attention of the various parties, but the alternative was to give way to, or unwillingly assist, the castration of law and order.

  ***

  Wishbone (humility was required on this occasion) floated the neutrality concept of IR’s remit. He was correct that the Cabinet would challenge such a risky step. He managed to defuse most of it by embellishing his simple ‘live in the now’ concept, to which all politicians were susceptible, and it reminded them of their own career mortality potential. The fiercest resistance, unsurprisingly, came from Bristling Jo, in this case, not Maybe but Definitely. His elitist spines were quivering, regardless of which personality transplants he engaged. His first argument, as Chancellor, was spiralling lack of control of the budget, a common consequence with all recruits from the ranks. This was backed up with dismay that the proposed direct reporting, and its attendant recipe for supplanting traditional Cabinet order was just a transient vote-catching stunt. The tirade continued with the declaration that this was a white flag of surrender to the uneducated masses.

  “Sorry,” queried an angry PM, “which party are you a member of? For a moment I thought it was the W.C. Party. I could have been forgiven if I thought it was the Imperial Imposition Party. Do you have any objections which aren’t based on fear? Or alternatively, have you actually bothered to look for any positive balancing factors?”

  There was an outbreak of seat shifting, clearing of throats and inexplicable failure to prevent pens dropping to the floor, as members felt sufficient discomfort to request a comfort break. They all seemed to recognise a ‘crossing the Rubicon’ moment, except ‘spikey the bristling hedgehog.’

  The time out did not quell his head shaking, so the PM accepted a strong majority to test drive the idea, subject to no tremors from the Scavengers of Administration.

  To that end Wishbone (yes, still Wishbone) suggested up front that Administration should have a member from their department on IR’s team (or would that be shoulder?) in order to ensure time-honoured protocols were not abused. It was never going to find enthusiasm from these musty old suits, but it didn’t meet with any fervent resistance, probably because they were in a hurry to get back to the re-design of expense forms with better scrutiny.gov features.

  ***

  And so it was that IR resigned his party membership and took up his new office. Tarquin was besieged by a turmoil of conflicting emotions. He decided to contact Ralluph Wilderberry-Pork one last time, knowing he may not be receptive, fearing that Tarquin was likely to call in a return favour. The opposite was in fact the case. Ralluph was only too eager to suggest De Vere would be out of his mind to get mixed up in this charade with Richardson. Without explaining why, he gave it six months at most. Such unsolicited advice was totally out of character, and a bit of a volte-face.

  ***

  Tarquin caught up with IR and delivered his decision. He was to ignore, no, rather decline Wilderberry-Pork’s advice. “I’m on board Regional Secretary, now when can you explain to me why I’m doing this?”

  “Oh, I’m terribly sorry De Vere, I’ve managed to persuade the PM to accept my resignation from the party to really be independent, and I know you couldn’t commit to such a radical step, which I know is due to fierce loyalty. It would be impossible for us to work together with such imbalance, a great pity.”

  “Things have moved on Richardson, the BNP tried to shut down the Owl, it was thwarted by the citizens I hoped to represent, but they are not alone. They live all over the country, and you are correct, we don’t need political colours to get the best we can for them, dedication and a fair following wind will suffice.”

  “You mean you are actually prepared to resign your membership to help me?”

  “Already have, I just hope you can also convert me to your method of staying cool under pressure from interfering fruit bats.”

  “Tarquin, our differences can be our strength, and don’t forget, part of our remit is to exclude PC. I remember very vividly the Owl telling me to avoid being the architect of such a crusade. The PM has seen to that himself. Now we have to continue to create the environment it doesn’t like. Brushing it aside will hardly be noticed if we can overturn more specific injustice, while at the same time restoring the citizens’ free speech, unfettered by the retreating PC mantra.”

  “I can’t wait. I’ll join you when you’re ready.”

  “Well, I want to return to Redwood to assure citizens and good friends that this is not farewell, just a refocusing of the example they themselves have set, and that I’ll always come to banter with them whenever possible. So, I’ll see you then and we can team up from ther
e.”

  Chapter 38

  Ruby Bickerstacks had also analysed and shared one conclusion with the PM. That wasn’t difficult, not a coincidence and not surprising, as it had been predicted by Otto and his like some time ago. Whereas the PM had the luxury of taking action, Ruby had to try to deliver only promises, and derail the governing party’s innovative programmes. The promises had to be radical but not show existing policy in a bad light. A further irritant would be the minority parties with their opportunism, particularly the BNP, and particularly their leader.

  Dolph Edicct, a wily and prodigiously tenacious woodpecker, knew this was the moment. It had to be seized, it may never come again. His most pressing concern was that the mainstream parties would escalate efforts to hijack his own party’s appeal by offering simpler, transparent, decisive action, but from a ‘party you know.’

  He would have to press them on the finest detail in an attempt to worry or alienate their back benchers. He would also repeatedly call on citizens’ intelligence to evaluate this copycat gesturing, within the perspective of why they had not done this until after the landslide of the local elections. He would coin the phrase – ‘smear of fear.’ This had to be pursued in a calm, even-handed way, not exuding arrogance, or even confidence, merely a trust in the electorate’s ability to see through the deception.

  ***

  IR’s visit to link up with his unlikely team mate and old friends meant he had but a short time alone with the Owl, but there was one pressing matter he wanted to explore.

  “What a wonderful surprise Richardson. I am both dismayed and exhilarated that you are scaling the echelons. I confess however, I will miss our exchanges.”

 

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