What am I doing?
I immediately take it off, put it back in the box, and shove it across the table.
Chapter Thirty-five
Liam
We move equipment into the new rehearsal space. “It’s not as big as the barn,” Garrett says.
“Not many places are,” Bria says.
“It’s not as cool either.”
Crew carries in a stool. “We’ll get used to it. Famous bands don’t practice in barns.”
“Who says?” Garrett asks.
I step forward. “I say.”
Garrett twirls a drumstick. “I get that you hate Dirk and all, but I’m going to miss that old barn.”
“Good fucking riddance,” I say.
“Good riddance to whom?” Ronni asks.
I haven’t seen her since the day she left Florida, and it’s been the best five weeks of our contract. “We’re going to need boundaries, Ronni. You can’t just burst in here whenever you want.”
She pulls out a business card and reads it. “Veronica Collins, Independent Talent Agent, Indica Record Label.” She shoots me a triumphant look. “I work here, and I’m your rep, so I think I can burst in here whenever I damn well please.”
Bria lets out a huff and leaves to get another load.
“Seriously, Ronni?” Crew says. “We know who you are and what you’ve done for us, but we need some space. We want to be able to work or even goof off sometimes, without everyone breathing down our necks.”
“What do you propose? That I make an appointment every time I have to see you?” She laughs as if it’s a preposterous idea.
He thinks on it. “We only got together with you once a week before. When we’re not recording, how about we schedule a time, say every Monday afternoon or whatever works for you. We’ll have a meeting and go over anything you need to talk about. Otherwise, maybe do us the courtesy of sending a text to see if we’re available.”
“Who appointed you leader?” she says to Crew. “You’re rehearsing here for free. When I need to talk to you, I’ll come in. There’s nothing to discuss.”
I brush past her. “Unless you want to get dirty, I suggest you steer clear. Either that or help us. We still have a lot to unload.”
She follows me into the hall and steps close. “I may want to get dirty, but not unloading your gear.” She gives me her fuck-me eyes.
It takes me two seconds to realize what a colossal fool I was to sleep with her. She’s nothing like Ella. Nobody I’ve slept with is like Ella. “Not gonna happen, Ronni.”
“That’s what you said after the first time.”
“Whatever.” I leave her inside and head out to the van. I do a double take when I think I see Ella standing on the sidewalk talking to Bria. It is her.
Crazy shit happens to my body. It hits me like a gut-punch how much I’ve missed her. Suddenly I feel like a real dick for not calling. I join them, tail between my legs.
“I’m not here for you,” she says shyly. “Bria and I are going to lunch.”
Bria thumbs to the door. “I have to get my purse. Be right back.”
Ella and I are alone on the sidewalk.
“I should have called,” I say. “I promised we’d keep running.”
“You don’t owe me anything.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I owe you a lot. You helped me compose again.”
She looks at the ground. “You’d have done it with or without me.”
“On that we’ll have to agree to disagree.”
“What are we disagreeing about?” someone says behind me. My nostrils flare. It’s Dirk. He looks Ella up and down. “And who do we have here?”
When I don’t introduce him, she says, “Ella Campbell.”
Dirk’s eyebrows shoot up as his gaze darts between Ella and me.
“No relation,” she hastily adds.
He offers his hand. “Dirk Campbell. Nice to meet you, Ella. I apologize for the rudeness of my nephew.” I step towards him and he holds up a hand. “Easy, boy. I came around to see how the new rehearsal space is shaping up.”
“In case you didn’t notice, we moved out of the barn to get away from you.”
“Yet you moved into another building I own. If you recall, I own the entire company, so in a way you could say I own you.”
“Fuck off, Dirk.”
I start to walk away, and he grabs my elbow. “Is that any way to talk to your boss?” He turns to Ella. “Again, you’ll have to excuse Liam. If he were younger, I’d give him a good knock on the ass to teach him some manners.”
I look down with a mutinous glare. “Want to get your goddamn hand off me?”
“You don’t like it there?”
It takes me half a second to pin him to the wall. Fury burns deep inside me. “I could ruin you.”
He laughs in my face.
“Remember Lance Holloway?” He looks at me blankly. “Of course you don’t, because you don’t give a shit about the people you employ. He was part of your security team for ten years. You really fucked the pooch, Dirk, because right after you fired Lance, he slipped me a flash drive with footage from your house that I’ll bet would be interesting to a lot of people.”
“You’re lying,” he says. “You’d have done something before.”
“I was waiting for the right moment. Guess what? That moment is coming.” I clench my jaw. “Now leave.”
“Everything okay out here?” Garrett says.
I let Dirk go and glance at Ella, who is put off by what just happened.
Dirk brushes himself off ceremoniously. “I’ll see you inside then. Have to make sure everything is running properly. I didn’t get rich by accident, you know.” He scowls at me. “With wealth comes lots of important connections. Don’t forget that.”
Crew and Bria come out, passing Dirk. “What’d we miss?” Crew says.
“Same old shit.” I kick the side of the building. “Maybe moving here was a mistake.”
“He won’t be around much,” Crew says. “He’s got way more to do than babysit us. He’s only here to rile you up.”
I go over to Ella. “I’m sorry you had to see that. My uncle and me … it’s complicated.”
“I can see that. He owns the record label?”
I snort. “He bought it after we signed with them. He thinks he can control me.”
“Oh, God.” Her eyes say it all. She thinks he’s like my dad.
“No, he doesn’t … he’s not.”
She looks relieved but still very confused.
Niles joins us. “You settling in okay?”
“Yes. Thanks. Ella, this is Niles Armentrout. He runs things here.”
Niles whispers. “Don’t tell that to Dirk.”
“Ready?” Bria says to her. “Sorry, Liam, we’d invite you, but this is a girls’ only lunch.”
Crew comes up behind her and gives her a hug. “You bailing out so the rest of us have to do all the heavy lifting?”
She spins and kisses him. “I think you can handle it. See you later.”
“Bye,” Ella says over her shoulder.
“Maybe I’ll see you sometime?” I feel like a prick the second the words leave my mouth. I don’t know how to do this shit. Of course I want to see her. But everyone is standing here. And Dirk is inside. Also Ronni. We should never have agreed to rehearse here.
“Maybe,” she says before turning the corner.
Crew goes by, carrying two of Garrett’s cymbals. “Smooth.”
“Shut up.”
Brad walks up and looks inside the van to see what’s left. “Hey, Liam.”
“Nice of you to show up,” I say, heavy on the sarcasm.
“I didn’t realize we were moving ourselves,” he says. “You know, since we have Bruce and all. I was in town and wanted to check out the new space.”
“Bruce isn’t here. You should check your email once in a while.”
“Been a long week.” He picks up a box. “You’re lucky I’m here at a
ll. We were supposed to have the whole week off to recover from the tour.”
Garrett appears. “Lucky? We’re lucky to have you here? Who died and made you king?”
“Fuck off,” Brad says.
Garrett and I share a look. Brad doesn’t usually curse.
“What’s wrong with you?” I ask. “You look like death warmed over. You okay, man?”
He looks guilty for snapping at us. “It’s nothing. Let’s just get this stuff inside.”
I hang back and sit in the open van. I stare up at the IRL sign. It’s a huge gold record emblazoned with the company name. Everything we’ve wanted is happening—I glance at Dirk and Ronni as they talk inside the main doors—but at what price?
I’m beginning to understand that getting what you want doesn’t come easily. Why should Ella be any different?
Chapter Thirty-six
Ella
A knock on the door wakes me. I fell asleep on the couch. My head is still fuzzy from the three margaritas I had at lunch. There’s another knock. The room is dark. How long did I sleep?
I turn on a lamp, stumble to the front door, and put my eye to the peephole. Nobody’s there. I open the door and look down the hallway. Liam is walking away. “Hey, I’m here.”
He spins around, a slow smile spreading across his face.
I motion inside. “Want to come in?”
“Sure.”
He walks in and spends a minute checking out the room. “I forgot you’ve never been inside my apartment,” I say.
He laughs. “Kind of strange, considering how well we know each other.”
I cock my head. “Do we? Know each other?”
“Can I sit?”
“It’s a free country.”
He sighs. “I should have called.”
“You said that earlier.”
He sits on the couch and rubs a hand across his jaw. “I don’t know how to do this, El. On the plane it was almost like you were saying goodbye. I don’t know what you want. I don’t know what I want either.”
I sit in the chair next to the couch. “I wasn’t saying goodbye. I was pointing out that things were going to change. We went from living in the same hotel room and eating all our meals together to returning home and going back to reality. But it doesn’t change how I feel. I told you before what I wanted.”
“So you still want to—”
“Run together? Yes.”
He blinks, clearly confused. “I, uh, yeah.”
“I’m kidding. Yes, Liam, I still want to.”
Relief washes over him, but I also sense a hint of fear.
“What did you mean when you said you don’t know how to do this?” Realization strikes. “Have you ever had a girlfriend?”
“Girlfriend?” He chokes on the word. “Who said anything about girlfriend?”
“Answer the question.”
He shakes his head. A chunk of hair falls over one eye, and he pushes it aside.
“You need a haircut.”
“Haven’t had time.”
“I could do it. I used to cut … well, I can cut hair. Want me to?”
He hesitates. Is he thinking I’ll have to touch him to cut his hair?
“Surely you don’t cut your own hair,” I say.
“No.”
“Then what’s the big deal if I do it?”
“Fine.”
I stand. “Pull one of the kitchen chairs under the light over there. I’ll get my stuff.”
I’m practically giddy, knowing I’m going to touch him again. It’s been five days. Five long, drawn-out, lonely days. When I return with the haircutting kit, he’s standing at the table, gazing at the ring. I run over and take it from him, close the box, and put it away.
His eyebrows draw down as he scowls. “What the hell is that?”
“What does it look like?”
“A goddamn engagement ring.”
“I think Corey might have proposed.”
“You think?”
“I ran into him at the park a few days ago, and it came in the mail yesterday.”
“He sent it to you?”
“I think he was trying to prove a point.”
“Which is?”
“That he loves me.”
He paces behind the couch. “What did you say?”
“I haven’t said anything.”
“Why not?” He studies me. “Is he what you want, El?”
“Of course not.”
“Then why haven’t you sent it back?”
“Haven’t gotten around to it.” I motion to the chair. “Are we going to do this or what?”
He sits, clearly brooding which pleasures me to no end. I wrap the smock around him, but it gets caught on the chair post and rips. I make a disgusted noise.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“The smock is useless now.”
“I don’t need it.”
“Hair will get on you, and it will be itchy.”
“I think I can handle it.”
I fetch a dishtowel from the kitchen. “Use this to catch any drips.”
I use a spray bottle to wet his hair, then I comb through it, speculating how I should attack it. I part it down the middle, and section by section, work my way from front to back and top to bottom, cutting only little bits at a time.
“Don’t be afraid to cut,” he says as small wisps fall to the ground. “It’s only hair.”
“It’s not just any hair. You’re in a rock band. It has to be perfect.” I take a step back. “What if I screw it up? Ronni will have my head on a platter. Maybe we didn’t think this through.”
He pulls me between his legs, and suddenly this has become much more than a haircut. “It’ll grow back. I trust you, El.”
My heart flutters. Does he have any idea how powerful those words are, coming from him? I doubt he’s trusted many people in his life.
I go back to cutting. I’m so close to him, I can feel his breath on my chest. I’m all too aware that he’s left his hand on my leg. I can feel the heat of it through my jeans. I need to move to do the sides, but I don’t want to. I like the way his hand feels on me.
Eventually, I’m forced to change position or the front will be too short. He’s a rock star. His hair needs to be long and roguish. I can’t take off too much.
When I finish, I run my fingers through the back of his hair. He grabs my hands. “What are you doing?”
“Checking to see if it’s even.”
He releases me. I come around front and do the same thing. I’m acutely aware that he’s breathing faster, and I’m pretty sure there’s a bulge in his pants. I try not to smile.
“All done.” I pick up the hand mirror and hold it out. “What do you think?”
He doesn’t even look at it. “It’s fine.”
Our eyes lock. Flutters rise in my belly.
He stands abruptly. “I … you were right. It itches. Can I jump in your shower and rinse off?”
“Sure.” I point. “Right through there.”
He disappears without another word. I hear the water turn on. And all I can do is stand here and think about him naked in my shower.
A knock on the door pulls me from my fantasy. Without even checking to see who it is, I open it. Immediately I realize my mistake. It’s Corey, with a dozen roses. “Well?”
I glance back at the bathroom. “This really isn’t a good time.”
He steps around me and into the room. “You got the ring, right?”
“I got it.” I pick it up and hand it to him. “And now I’m giving it back.”
“Don’t, Ella. We belong together.”
“If that were true, you’d never have cheated, and we’d actually still be together.”
“How many times do I have to say I’m sorry?”
“You don’t have to anymore. Just walk away.”
A noise comes from the bathroom. Corey looks around the apartment. He sees the hair on the floor. “Is someone here?”
; “Yes.”
“Who?”
“No one you know.”
“A man?”
The bathroom door cracks open. “Did you say something?” Liam asks. When I don’t respond, he sticks his head out and sees Corey.
“This is—”
“I know who it is,” Liam says, coming out with only a towel around him.
“Aren’t you going to introduce us?” Corey asks through gritted teeth. When I don’t, he steps forward and holds out a reluctant hand. “Corey Gorman.”
Liam doesn’t shake. “Liam Campbell.”
Corey’s surprised. “Campbell?” He looks hopeful. “Are you related?”
Liam puts an arm around my shoulder. “I hope not, because we’d probably get arrested in some states, eh, El?”
I’m shocked by what he said. Liam smiles and kisses my head.
Corey’s lips are pinched. “So you two …?”
Liam pulls me tightly against him. “Pretty much.”
Corey eyes the box in his hand. He’s clearly devastated. I feel bad for him. I still care about him despite what he did to me. “Corey, I’m sorry, but I’ve tried to tell you for months it’s over.”
Defeated, he starts for the door, pausing to put the flowers on the credenza. He glances back at Liam. “Liam Campbell. Where have I heard that name before?”
Liam shrugs. “Beats me.”
“Goodbye, Ella,” he says. “I hope you’ll be happy.”
I hold back tears.
The door closes, and Liam lets me go, confused by my reaction. “Why are you crying? Did you want to marry him?”
“No, but he was a big part of my life for a long time, and now it seems so final.”
“This was a good thing, then. He knows you’re unavailable. Maybe now he’ll be able to move on.”
“Am I unavailable?”
He nods to the hair on the floor. “We should clean that up. I’ll get dressed while you find me a dustpan.”
He comes out of the bathroom as I throw the hair in the trash. “Do you want a drink?” I ask from the kitchen.
“I was going to clean up the floor.”
Reckless Invitation (The Reckless Rockstar Series) Page 19