by BA Tortuga
“I will. I can’t blame them.” That was a terrifying thing for the kids in New Mexico. Cops often meant family issues or problems with border agents.
“No, me either, but they need to know some of you are the good guys.”
“Most of us.”
“Right. Most of you.”
He shook his head. “Encourage them, huh?”
“I do. I swear to you, I worry about them every day. They need to believe there are adults that care.”
“There are. You do amazing things.” He settled on the parm.
“So, back to you.” Travis stopped as they ordered, and his crazy buddy did order a piece of pie for his main.
“Uh. Okay, shoot.” He wasn’t sure where they’d stopped.
“Housewarming present requests?”
“Well, Brant had a lot. Something arty that’s not a poster to put in the man cave?”
“I’ve been in Brant’s house. He’s very into his Southwestern decor. It’s adorable.”
“Well, there you go. Something from Old Town.” He loved Brant’s house, because it never seemed overdecorated or contrived.
“Fair enough. I remember when he bought that house. You should have seen him waffle.” Travis laughed, and God, it was good to see.
“Yeah? Like about what?” He grabbed his drink when it arrived, sipping it instead of gulping like he wanted to. Maybe he should get a water too.
“Oh Lord. Was this the right neighborhood? Did he want a new build or a vintage? The only thing he was sure about was that he wanted a big backyard. This was after the deal with that asshole.”
“Asshole?” God, he did love getting details about Brant’s life that his lover just didn’t consider important.
“Oh, there was a shit breakup, apparently, and the guy stole most all of Brant’s stuff, packed it in an SUV, and then got himself killed on the highway.”
Lex blinked. Then he blinked again. “Jesus, Trav!”
“Right? Brant was livid. Just pissed.” Travis took a long drink before starting again. “But Matt always said that was when he knew, all the way, that Brant was a Burqueño. He never once talked about going back to Texas. Instead he started house-hunting.”
“I think maybe he made a good choice.” He adored the house, and the yard was made of awesome.
“Oh, I think so. It’s got great bones, and it’s got the charm he wanted.”
“Totally.” Lex did love the way Brant loved his house.
“Matt wanted him to buy a condo. Something upscale and fancy.”
“Yeah?” He couldn’t see his Brant in a condo. “Whose idea was it to buy your house?”
“Oh, we had it built. We both wanted something brand-new, a blank slate.” Travis winked at him. “No yard to speak of.”
“Ah. No, I noticed that. I know you have a black thumb.” Hell, Travis always had. The man had killed their mung bean sprouts in kindergarten.
“I do. Is your plant still alive?”
“It is. Dusty and Nate took good care.” His cheeks went red-hot, because Lord, had he told the whole world about that plant?
“Hey, it’s good. Good practice for the monster cats.”
“Do they like you?”
Trav’s eyes went comically wide. “God no. The Persians hide, and that evil monster just scratches everything.”
His Mouse? No way. He just shrugged. “We have an agreement, I guess.”
“You and Brant?”
“No, dork. Me and Mouse.” He winked broadly.
Travis gave him a disbelieving stare. “You. And the cat. You have an agreement?”
“Yep. I do what he wants, and he doesn’t hurt me.” Much.
“Wow. You’re being abused by your lover’s cat.”
“No. We have a relationship.” That did sort of sound like he was being abused. Mouse was very dominating. If Mouse had opposable thumbs, man, Lex would have to worry about things like finding Brant cuffed to the refrigerator. He chuckled. Nah. Mouse would just order pizza. That cat was obsessed with a deluxe pie.
“What’s funny? Are you fantasizing about a cat?”
“No, but I was thinking about one. Mouse likes pizza. Dusty and Nate found out the hard way.”
“Oh. Oh, those are your friends from Cruces? Did Mouse the Bully steal their pizza?”
“He did. Next time they come up, we’ll all go to supper.” He felt a serious pang of guilt about not inviting Travis over to meet the guys.
“I’d like that. I… I think I’m going on a cruise this summer. Not a pick-up thing, but just something totally different.” Travis sighed, took a sip of his drink. “Is that weird?”
“No. It’s good for you.” He thought it would be great for Trav to get away for a bit.
“Yeah? It’s not too soon? I mean, I just…. The summer is too soon.”
“Nah. I think it’s great. I mean, that’s why you’re a teacher, right? So you have your summers.”
“Yeah, and now I can travel.” The tears welled up in Travis’s eyes, and Lex braced himself for a storm, but Travis just blinked them back.
“You can.” He reached a hand across the table, so Travis took it, holding on.
“Invite me to supper some evening? So I can make up with Brant and tell him how sorry I am.”
“Absolutely. I’ll get with Brant and see what all our schedules look like, but it should be soon.” He wanted that, for real.
“Thanks. Now, when do you go talk to the guys at the precinct? You need to get that detective desk.” Travis glanced over. “Did I say that right?”
“You did. I go see my old sergeant on Monday. He didn’t want to deal with me this week.” Lex was worried that meant no job, but he could go Rio Rancho or Los Lunas or even Santa Fe if he had to.
“You be careful, huh? I don’t… no getting shot.”
“I’ll do my best, buddy.” His salad came, so he let go of Trav’s hand. “I know it’s scary.”
“Yeah. I don’t know how Brantley copes. It took forever and years of therapy after he got shot.”
“It did?” Brant seemed so… well, not post-traumatic, really. Lex got it. He’d done the mandatory therapy the force had required after the bomber and everything…. Now he just worked out when the demons came looking late at night. Coping mechanisms.
“Yeah. Yeah, I mean, this time he didn’t get hit, but….” Travis shivered. “At least Matt didn’t hurt. He would have hated living with a serious brain injury. He wouldn’t have thanked anyone for that.”
“No.” No, that much he knew. Brant had signed the guys’ wills as a witness and had been their medical power of attorney. Mental note, he needed to ask Travis about changing all that now.
“Okay. Happy things. Tell me your favorite thing about your new house.”
“The yard. We’ve had dinner out there most nights. I love it.” His mom would love it too.
“Yeah? So you’re glad he didn’t tear it out and put in a pool? That was my suggestion.”
“You’re kidding. I mean, water guilt.” He loved the wisteria and cactus and hummingbirds. Brant had worked his butt off for this.
“I know. I thought it would be nice, though. I go to the aquatic center, you know that.” Travis stuck out his tongue, just teasing away, which was so good to see.
“I do. I have a man cave gym room.” That was still so damn cool.
“No shit? He gave up his office?”
“He did.”
“Well, I’ll be damned. It must be love.” Travis winked. “Though I know the desktop was gone.”
“He uses his laptop on the couch.” The filing cabinet was still in the closet, just for ease of storage.
“Yeah, he still uses the treadmill at the gym?”
“I guess? I have room to put one in….” He did, in fact. Lex had thought about a Bowflex or something, but he could so put in a treadmill.
“Eh, ask him. He runs on his lunch hour in the hospital. He gets some sort of bonus.”
“Oh! Right.�
�� That made sense. He wouldn’t mess with that.
The food came and they started talking about random shit, easy stuff, and it felt good. Oddly like high school, where they were just two guys hanging out. It was nice to relax.
Travis teased the hell out of him for settling down, and he dared to tease Travis about how often he ordered takeout.
He felt like things might be all right.
That was a pretty damn good feeling.
Chapter Twenty-One
BRANT CAME home Friday shaken.
The detectives had come to the office to show him pictures of a dozen different men who were possible suspects in Matty’s murder. A couple he could reject out of hand—the guy had been Hispanic, maybe Indios, but not black, not Anglo. There were two who were definite maybes, but it had been dark, and the guy had worn a hoodie. He’d seen a skinny, young dude with red shoes.
“Why can’t I remember more, Matty? What the hell?” He was supposed to go to the grocery store, but he didn’t want to. “I fucking feel like the world’s biggest motherfucking loser.”
He slipped out of his car and stretched, his back popping, his hip screaming at him. Stress always made that bitch wake up and drive him nuts. It didn’t make sense, not a bit.
Brant let himself in, finding Lex there, sound asleep on the couch. A stack of paperwork sat next to him, all neatly filled out in Lex’s block printing. Someone must have gotten himself a job.
Suddenly he couldn’t breathe; he couldn’t quite manage to move. Christ. Christ, if he didn’t know better, he’d think he was having a heart attack. He stumbled to the bathroom, searched out his Ativan, and forced himself to take one before he sat down on the pot.
His hands shook, so he stared at them, clenching them to stop the tremors. In. Out. Breathe.
It was the detectives, he knew it. They’d come, and he hadn’t been able to do it. He hadn’t known. What if he had just let Matty’s killer go?
“Baby? Is that you?” Lex called from just beyond the door.
“Yeah. I didn’t mean to wake you. How’s it going?” He washed his face off real quick. Get it together, son. You got this.
Then he opened the door, wearing a smile.
“Hey.” Lex kissed his cheek. Those dark eyes took in every bit of him. “You okay? You’re pale.”
“Rough day at work. The detectives came by.” He could order from DoorDash, right? Green chile burgers.
“Did they have any news?”
That knowing gaze was too much, making him duck past to head to the kitchen. “They had a bunch of photos. I couldn’t recognize anyone.”
“Baby, I saw the CCTV. There wasn’t much to see.”
He reached for a beer, then shook his head. No. No beer with the antianxiety drugs. “Want a Coke?”
“Sure.” Lex followed him like a K-9 rather than a boyfriend. “You want me to follow up?”
“Whatever will find Matty’s shooter, huh?” He felt the pill starting to work, the world going a little bit easier, a little less sharp around the edges.
“You know it.” Lex put both hands on his arms, rubbing up and down.
He leaned back into Lex’s strength, willing himself to be cool. Calm. Collected.
“I got a big package of information to fill out today. Looks like my interview Monday is just a formality.” Lex kissed his neck.
“Yeah? Are you excited?” Do you know what shift you’re getting? Do you know what you’re going to be doing? Do you know who you’re going to be working with?
“I have no idea. I know I won’t start at detective. They have someone retiring in six months, and I’m one of three guys they’ll consider, since I was working my way up so close in Cruces, but I’m not sure what division I’ll be in until then.”
Well, what did he say to that? He just reached up and took Lex’s hand. It was the best he had. Especially right this second.
“You want to order in?” That little squeeze of his hand told him maybe Lex understood.
“Yeah. I really do. I’ll grocery shop tomorrow.”
“It’s Saturday. We’ll go together.”
He sighed and nodded. “I’d like that.”
“Cool. I want some Fritos for Frito pie.” Lex rubbed at his back with the one free hand.
“Oh, I knew I chose you for a reason. We should grill some chicken over the weekend.”
“I like it. Then we’ll have protein all week if we get busy.” Lex hummed and swayed with him.
God, he wanted to ask a thousand questions, but he didn’t want to sound like a fluttering dick, so he let it go. Lex would tell him about schedules and shifts and all when he knew.
“Hey, come sit, huh? I’ll grab your computer, and we can order supper.” Lex drew him to the couch, letting him carry the Cokes.
“What are you thinking? We got options.” He’d even get Annapurna’s.
“Green chile cheeseburgers.”
Man, they were in sync right now. Brant nodded. “I was just thinking about that.”
“Excellent. I’m craving that and fries. Maybe a milkshake.” Lex grinned at him. “You want to run to Blake’s? We could be daring and go see a movie.”
Only if they didn’t get gas afterward.
“Sure. I’m game.” The pill was really working, so he could let Lex take him out. Right? “You willing to drive?”
“I am.” Lex hopped back up. “I’ll change real quick. You rest your head.”
“Thank you. I think I will.” He stretched out, his back popping. He thought Lex suspected he’d taken something, but it wasn’t illegal. Hell, the script wasn’t even out of date.
“Be right back.” Lex was off, and he did close his eyes but jumped when Mouse landed on him.
“Hey, you big beast. How goes it?”
Mouse yowled dramatically.
“Oh, don’t give me that. I saw you napping with Lex.” Brant rubbed those big ears. Mouse blinked, and his eyes crossed. “Yeah, that’s it, isn’t it?”
“Are you giving cat scritches?” Lex was laughing. “Because the girls are feeling neglected.”
“Are they? Peachie! Cream! Come on, baby girls!”
The Persians popped out from under the ottoman, purring and meowing. He held one arm open, and he was suddenly covered in kitties. They were telling him all about it too, loud and proud.
“You are owned,” Lex accused, and he nodded. God yes. Totally.
Lex plopped back on the couch, not seeming to be in any huge hurry. That was probably good, because Mouse pounced, taking Lex down to groom him.
“Uh. Who’s owned?”
“Me. He’s got me.” Lex laughed and rubbed as commanded. Good man.
“I love this—having you here.” He meant it too. He adored having Lex around, sharing the stupid, normal, silly stuff.
“Me too.” Lex rolled his head to look at Brant. “Let’s stay in.”
“You want me to order online? I’m all over that.” He would love to sit and cuddle, stay in out of the Friday-night busyness.
“Yeah. I think that will work.” Lex kissed his elbow, which was all Mouse was allowing.
“Green chile cheeseburgers and fries. I’m on it.” Staying in was perfect.
Safe.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“HEY, ESPANA! Good to see you back.” Leo Huerta clapped him on the back.
“Good to be here, man. When did you go from a uniform to a suit?”
“When I took Robbery instead of holding out for Homicide.” Leo shook his hand. “You on patrol?”
“Until I can move up, yeah.”
“It’ll happen quick, man. You’ve got time in service. You want Vice? Narcotics?”
“No. Vice will want undercover.” He sat, trying not to show how weird the new uniform felt. Starched. “No, I’d rather work under you, or with the guys at Homicide. I’m good at interviews and canvassing. First-on-scene stuff. I mean, I know I won’t get a choice, but that’s my jam.”
“Uh-huh. Detective will
come sooner that way too.” Leo grinned at him. “Sucks getting old, huh? You start wanting to stay home a little more.”
“I got a reason now.”
“No shit? Well, good on you.” Leo chuckled. “We want you assigned to a unit, then.”
“Put in a good word for me, man. I’d appreciate it.”
“You know I will. So, coffee?”
“Please. I’ve been off work for a week or two, and I feel lazy.” He could get to being a laze, if it wasn’t for the mind-numbing boredom.
“Yeah? How is it down in Cruces? Busy?” Leo led him to the break room.
“God, yes. It’s crazy right now with all the extra political bull.” He shook his head. People were scared.
“Yeah. You had that whole bomber thing. That was wild. You are the one that got him, huh?”
“I’m the one.” He pressed away the cascade of memories that tried to push into his mind.
“That was good, no? He needed to be stopped.” Leo clapped him on the back. “Hate to have to draw your piece, but it was a clean shot.”
“It was.” That was always such an asinine statement now that he’d had to shoot someone.
“Right. Coffee.”
He would say Leo paid attention, and he appreciated it. Some guys didn’t. He just nodded, ready to get to all the little meetings and such he had today.
God, he hated first days. At least this was a first day in a familiar place. He still knew a lot of the guys, and HR was already talking positively about his extra education and about him taking tests….
“Come on, man. Let me introduce you around. You’ve been gone awhile. Although you were up for your friend’s homicide, no? So you met a few new guys?”
“I did. We had a few talks.” God. His friend. He’d barely known Matt, but Brant and Travis deserved better from him.
“Cool. My condolences. I hope his family is okay.”
“They’re getting there.” What else could someone say? No one was okay, and Leo knew that. “So, how’s Denise?”
“She’s good. Real good. We’re talking about having one more baby.”
He blinked. “Shit, man, good luck.”
“Hey, if it doesn’t work, it’ll be fun to practice.”