Max
I pull open the big red door to the Pediatric Oncology ward, the smell of antiseptic making me damn near choke. At least the place is clean. The harsh scent that burns my nostrils is a sharp contrast to the warm and fuzzy feeling you get from walking through a hallway decorated with big, colorful flowers and bright rainbows surrounding a gaggle of smiling animals.
Anything to keep the kids happy.
I flex my fingers as I walk. I’ve never been the type to appreciate kids. Lily, Nico’s little sister, doesn’t count since I’ve known her from birth. She doesn’t annoy me. But the rest of the kiddie universe? Let’s just say I steer clear of the mall food court at lunchtime during the week. It’s a fucking zoo with all of the babies and toddlers in northern Jersey screaming, laughing, and crying while their moms sit around and bullshit over Starbucks.
But today, I’m putting all of that aside. I’m here to do something good, to be the guy Sloane needs…the one she thinks I am.
I’m not so sure she’s right, but I want to find out for myself.
I catch a glimpse of myself in a clear glass window as I head toward the nurses’ station. Leather jacket, of course. Black Air Jordans, black jeans, black t-shirt…Jesus, I need to add some color to my goddamn wardrobe.
A group of kids gallop toward me on broomstick horses, neighing as they slow to a stop. “Who are you?” A little blonde girl narrows her eyes at me.
“I’m, um, a friend of Eli’s,” I respond. With any luck, I can make that a reality.
She folds her arms over her chest. “Eli doesn’t have any friends. He’s mean.”
“Sandra, that’s not very nice.” A pretty, dark-haired girl in scrubs comes over and puts an arm around Sandra’s shoulders. “You know he’s having a hard time, sweetie.”
Sandra sighs and nods. “You’re right. I’m sorry, Nurse Jules.” She looks up at me. “Hey, you wanna play with us? You can be Black Beauty!”
I let out a chuckle. “Maybe later. I’ve got to see my pal. But thanks for the invite.”
She shrugs and flashes a bright smile at me before leading the rest of her crew in the direction of some makeshift stable in the open-air playroom.
The girl, Nurse Jules, straightens up and grins at me. “So, Black Beauty, huh?”
I shrug. “If I said I was color-blind, would that make it better?”
Her eyes rake over me, finally landing on mine with a pretty fucking blatant offer. “I don’t really think it could possibly be any bit better.”
Okay, all I want is to find this kid’s room…
I clear my throat. “I’m looking for a room.”
“I can find you a room.” She inches closer, and I swallow a groan. Yeah, she’s hot, but I’m on a mission. And this is hitting way too close to home since this is Sloane’s hospital. And her program. Besides, there are kids swarming the place, for Christ’s sake. What if one of them needs something? I lift an eyebrow. Doesn’t seem like the first time she’s made that kind of offer, I’m just saying.
“I’m actually looking for a friend of mine who’s here. Maybe you can point me in the right direction. His name is Eli.”
She places a hand on my arm. “Eli’s room is this way. I’ll walk you down there.”
“Thanks, but I can find it myself if you just give me the number.” The last thing I need is to roll in with Nurse Jules on my arm, claiming to be friends with a kid I’ve never laid eyes on. I can just picture it. Kid goes nuts, and hospital security will have my ass in a sling faster than Jules would strip off her scrubs if I gave her the word.
A look of disappointment shadows her face, but she flashes another blinding white smile. “It’s Room 20. Third door on the right.”
I nod and return the smile. “Thanks.” I hurry past the nurses’ station before any of them can stop me, and I take a right down the hallway. I quickly glance over my shoulder before rounding the corner and they’re all still staring after me. Jules has joined them, and damn, am I sore from the eye raping I just got.
I read the numbers on the door and stop outside of Room 20. I have a bag hoisted over my shoulder, which I shift so I can knock. Once, twice, three times, and nothing.
Fuck, what if he’s not even in here? I look up and down the hallway, and luckily the nurses aren’t lurking. I knock one more time, a little harder. “Fuck,” I grumble. I do shit like this all the time—acting before I think things through. What if he’s sleeping? What if he’s in there with a doctor? What if he’s sick from a treatment? What if—?
“What?” A sullen, male voice calls out.
“Hey, Eli,” I say, trying to keep my voice as peppy as possible. “I, uh, just wanted to stop by to say hi.” Perfectly innocent. I could be anyone on the hospital staff.
“Fuck off. I don’t want company.”
I recoil. Jesus Christ. “There are kids all over the place. Do you really think that kind of language is appropriate?” Look at me, being all adult-like.
A long pause. Then he answers. “Screw off. Is that better?”
I can’t help but smile. “Yeah. Thanks, man.” But I don’t leave. Something tells me to stay put. And then a minute later…
“I guess you can come in if you want.”
Yes! I’m fucking in! My smile fades. Great, once I open that door, what the hell comes next? What do I even say? I probably should have come up with something before showing up here.
But that’s never been the Max Oriani way.
Nope, I storm shit first, worry about it never.
I remember the last time I spoke those words.
Memories of Gabe come rushing back, and the guilt whirls around me like a funnel cloud. I can’t get sucked back into it again.
I am a good guy. I’m not a fucking monster. I can do the right thing.
Gabe’s blood is on my hands, but I won’t let it cripple me. I can help someone who really needs it. I can change things for myself. I don’t have to accept the hand I’ve been dealt. I can rise above it.
And that starts here and now.
I twist the handle on the door and push it open to find a kid reclined against a bunch of pillows. He has longish dark hair that looks like it hasn’t been combed in about a month, and he’s wearing dark blue sweats. I look around the room. No flowers or balloons or stuffed animals. He doesn’t even have the television on. It’s just him and an iPad in his hands. He doesn’t even look up when I walk into the room. He just keeps tapping the screen and grunting under his breath.
I place my bag on the floor and…nothing. I have no idea what the hell to do next. He doesn’t even know he doesn’t know me yet because he won’t look up from the game.
He stabs the screen for a few more seconds before his gaze darts in my direction. “Cool sneakers. I wanted a pair, and saved up for months. Then my mother found my stash and stole it so she could get high.” He finally looks up at me, his mouth twisted into a grimace. “I never asked anyone for anything. I earned that money doing crappy little jobs around the neighborhood, and she took it. I just wanted a good pair of sneakers so the kids at school wouldn’t make fun of me anymore. But she didn’t care about that...or me. She only cared about partying, and now she’s in jail. And I’m here. Alone with my cancer.” He narrows his dark eyes at me. “Do you know how badly life sucks for me right now?”
My jaw drops. I can’t even stop it. Sloane told me that he’s twelve. Twelve years old and on his own dealing with a disease that could potentially kill him before his next birthday. Anger courses through me. I’d like to find that mother of his and swing my baseball bat a few times in her direction. “Dude, I’m sorry…” My voice trails off because what the hell else can I say to make it better?
Absolutely nothing.
“Who are you, anyway?” He puts the iPad down and looks me up and down. “And seriously, what’s with the Grim Reaper look? I’m not dying, am I?” He lets out a dry laugh. “Well, maybe that wouldn’t be so bad.”
I crack a smile. “I’m a friend o
f one of your nurses. She said something about one of her patients being really into Fortnite, and since I’m a pretty incredible player myself, I figured maybe would could team up and kick some as…er, some butt together.”
He’s silent for a long minute, sizing me up with each passing second. I’m not used to this kind of examination by a kid. Usually punks are trying to size me up to see how much weight I can pack into a punch. They never guess right, either, the fucking morons.
“I only play solo.”
“You ever get a Victory Royale on your own?”
He shrugs. “Yeah, about sixty. Not bad.”
My eyes pop open wide and my jaw is on the floor yet again. It’s a record for me. “Sixty? Are you fu…are you serious? That’s like pro, my man.” I ball up my fist and hold it out to give him a bump.”
He rolls his eyes. “Relax. It’s only okay.”
I love this kid already.
“So, which nurse are you friends with?” He grabs a cup of water from the nightstand and takes a long sip.
“Um, her name is Sloane. She’s really sweet, has long brown hair, usually wears it in a bun, smiles a lot. You know her?”
Eli nods. “Yeah, she came in the other day when my brother Tommy was here. She’s hot. You messing around with her?”
“Dude! Discretion. Do you kiss and tell?”
“I don’t do anything to talk about. Look at me. I’m in a hospital bed with no hope of getting out anytime soon.”
“Oh, well, right.” I clear my throat. “So, anyway, yeah, she’s nice. I’ve known her for a long time. She thought you might like someone to hang out with. Someone who thought they’d wipe the floor with you at Fortnite but might actually learn something instead.” I chuckle and for the first time, Eli’s lips curl upward. Not a lot, just a little. But it’s enough to tell me I’ve broken through. Okay, maybe I made a hairline crack, if anything.
Still. That tells me there’s hope.
“I guess it’d be cool.” He shrugs. “You can stay. My brother’s gonna be here soon, though.”
“So you live with your brother?”
Eli nods. “Yeah. He does everything for me now that my mom is gone.”
“You’re lucky to have him.”
“I know. He’s my best friend. I hate to see him go through this. He works really long hours to make money for us to live. My mom used to steal from him, too.” He shakes his head. “We’re all we’ve got now.”
Christ, I want to just write a check to this kid, any amount that’ll take away the stress he’s under. He needs to stay positive to beat the cancer, but he looks so beaten down, so sad and alone. That’s what the damn disease feeds off of.
But that’s why I’m here. I want to help him. I know how much it sucks to feel lost and alone. I feel that way a lot…or at least I did before Sloane finally wiggled her way back into my life. I pull open the bag I brought. “Hey, do you like chocolate?” I turn it over and shake the contents onto his bed not waiting for a response. Packages of Raisinets, M&Ms, Blow Pops, Twizzlers, Starburst jelly beans, and Reese’s peanut butter cups spill onto his lap and I swear his face glows like a lightbulb for the next few seconds while he surveys all of his sugary options before a look of dismay shadows his face.
His eyes narrow at me.
“Oh, shit. I didn’t even think about it…are you okay to eat this stuff? I wasn’t sure what you’d like, so I got everything, but is it safe for you?” I push back my hair. Act first, think never. So fucking typical of me. What if he loves this stuff, but is forbidden to eat it? So I just dumped a whole boatload of the forbidden right in front of him? What an asshole I am!
He rolls his eyes. “Dude, I can’t eat any of this. I have cancer.” He peeks into the bag and lets out a groan. “Damn, Snickers? That’s my favorite.”
“Oh, shit,” I grumble, pulling the bag away from him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
Eli shrugs. “It’s okay. How could you know?”
“I’ve got other stuff…things you don’t actually eat.” I smirk and grab another bag, pulling out a Nintendo DS and some games. His eyes widen.
“Holy crap, are those for me?”
“Yep. All for you.”
He looks up at me after analyzing each and every game case. “I can’t give you any money for this stuff,” he says softly.
“Listen, man. It’s a gift. Actually, consider it payment for when you teach me how to get sixty of my own Victory Royales.”
He snickers. A for-real sort-of laugh. “It’s a deal.”
The door creaks open, and I turn toward the tall guy who appears in the doorway. He’s close to my height, wearing a very suspicious look on his face. “Eli, who’s this guy?”
Eli looks up. “Hey, Tommy. This is…” He looks at me. “Hey, you never told me your name.”
Tommy barrels toward me, grabbing me by the jacket and shoving me against a wall. “Who the hell are you and what do you want? If you’re here to collect from my mom, forget it. She’s in jail and we don’t have any money for you. Get the fuck out of here before I call security, you asshole.”
“Listen, Tommy, is it? I’m not here for money. I just came to spend some time with Eli, that’s all.”
“He’s friends with that nurse you think is hot.” Eli snickers.
Tommy reluctantly lets go of my jacket and pushes me away. “What do you want?”
“I just wanted to bring him a few things. You know, make him feel more comfortable. I swear, I’m not looking for any trouble.”
He dissects me with his eyes for a minute, and then decides I’m not a threat because he pushes past me to ruffle his brother’s hair. “How are ya feeling today?”
Eli collapses back on the pillows and lets out a loud groan. “Not too horrible.”
Tommy glares at me. “Are you an idiot? He shouldn’t be having all of this sugar.”
“Relax, Tommy. I didn’t eat any of it.” Eli picks up one of the games and slides it into the Nintendo DS.
“Listen, Tommy, I’m really sorry. I didn’t know it’d be bad for him. I just figured he might like a few treats. I know what hospital food is like,” I force a snicker to cut the tension, but Tommy doesn’t let up. His shoulders are squared, his mouth stretched into a tight line. My weak attempt to break the ice does absolutely nothing. I’ve made a fan with Eli, but Tommy? He wants to inflict pain. I know the look. If my head was in a vise right now, he might actually smile.
Eli waves the Nintendo DS in the air. “Check it out, T! I got game, man. This thing is awesome!”
Tommy’s narrowed eyes focus on me once again. Christ, if looks could kill, I’d be face down in a very shallow fucking grave. “Why’d you bring him that?”
I shrug. “I knew he liked video games. I figured he might enjoy something new.”
Tommy creeps toward me, his voice deep and menacing. “I don’t know who you are or why you’ve just shown up here to take pity on my brother, but we don’t need you. Or your gifts. I take very good care of Eli. We don’t need handouts, got it?”
My throat tightens. This is new territory for me. I’m not exactly what you’d call a philanthropist, so I just figured bringing him things he might like would win him over. I don’t know how to do this…how to make friends with a kid, how to be a buddy. I just want to do something positive for someone else. For once in my life I want to make a difference in a good way.
“I’m not giving you a handout. I’m just trying to make him comfortable, that’s all. I figured he might like to have a friend to hang out with and play video games with. That’s all, man. I don’t want anything from you or from Eli. I, uh, I don’t know if you’ve heard about this program the hospital has for kids on this floor, but—”
“The Buddy System or some shit, right?” Tommy grunts, rolling his eyes. “Because that’s gonna help Eli, right? Having some stranger come in here and pretend to know what Eli is going through?”
I glower at him, my fists balling at my sides. Fucking prick
has some nerve taking off after Sloane’s program. “This program has helped a ton of kids since it’s been put in place. Families appreciate it because there’s always downtime when they can’t be here for their kids. Having buddies really makes a difference here. They aren’t peppy assholes who come in and out and give lollipops in exchange for a smile. They’re people who’ve experienced similar circumstances, people who understand how to communicate with the kids and guess what? They actually help!” I puff out my chest, my voice getting louder and louder. “So before you spout shit, get your facts straight.” I wave at Eli. “Nice meeting you, kid. I really hope you beat this thing. Take care of yourself.” I swivel around, gritting my teeth. I pull open the door and walk into the hallway. My pulse throbs against my neck. That dickhead. I wanted so badly to take a swing at his smug ass mouth. Talking shit like that without—
I let out a deep sigh, stopping halfway down the hall and leaning against a bright orange-colored wall. Of course, he would be suspicious. Of course, he’d be apprehensive. He just found a stranger with his brother, a stranger who evidently looks like the Grim Reaper. If I’d have been Tommy, things would have gone down a lot differently. So he said some crap about the program. I get so damn defensive all the time. I really need to temper that shit.
“Hey.”
I turn my head in the direction of Tommy’s deep voice. “Yeah?”
He walks toward me, his hands stuffed into his pockets. “I didn’t mean to send you packing like that. I’m sorry for being an asshole. Our lives have been pretty fucked up lately. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.” He runs a hand over his shaved head, and his lips curl into a sad smile. “You know, I did this for him. I didn’t want him to lose his hair and feel like he looked different from everyone else, that people would stare and wonder. So I shaved mine so he’d have a partner in this.”
I nod. “I get it. He seems like a good kid. It sucks that he has to go through this. It sucks for both of you.”
Betraying the Mob (The Mob Lust Series Book 3) Page 14