by Debbie Burns
“That’s the meds,” her mom said.
Josie brushed her fingertips over her face.
“Don’t touch it, Josie.” Her mom stopped her hand.
“How bad do I look?”
Skye looked down. Sam shrugged one shoulder, then dropped his gaze too. “Not so bad.”
“Anybody got a mirror?”
After a pause, Sam pulled out his phone and snapped a picture. “Just remember, bruises heal. So do cuts.”
“Your doctor said the scratches won’t scar if you stay out of the sun,” her mom said. “Considering it’s January, you should be good. They’ve been putting creams on you all the time too.”
Josie reached for the phone, but Sam paused, holding it just out of reach. “Maybe you should wait awhile.”
“Sam, you’re freaking me out.”
Begrudgingly, Sam passed her his phone. It was a trick, she thought, staring at the blurry stranger on the small screen. Her lower lip was twice its normal size and split in two places. She had one purple-black eye and one green one. The bridge across her nose was swollen and exaggerated, making her look like the beast from Beauty and the Beast. Four long scratches ran down the length of her right cheek from temple to chin.
She fought off the urge to cry. “I guess you’re not going to tell me I look like Rita Hayworth anymore, are you, Mom?”
Sam huffed. “You’ll be good in a week. You’re only here because your concussion was so bad.”
Josie passed back the phone and closed her eyes. A thousand thoughts raced through her clouded mind, including how they’d ever pay for the medical bills.
Acting more like a typical mother than Josie could remember, Skye closed her hand around Josie’s wrist, caressing her gently with her thumb.
“Those girls were suspended for a month, except Isabelle. She was expelled.”
“What about Nico? Have you heard from him?”
Sam dragged his fingers through his hair. “Hungry? I’m starving. Want me to head down to the cafeteria and sneak you something better than the nasty Jell-O on your tray?”
“Sam, I’m not a four-year-old you can sidetrack with the promise of a piece of candy.” She pressed a finger over her lips. Talking was splitting them open. “Where is he?”
Sam looked at her mom, and Skye shook her head. “She won’t stop until someone tells her. But it’s going to have to be you. I need a cigarette. I’ll stop by the cafeteria on the way back and see what I can drum up.”
“What happened?” Josie asked again as her mom walked out.
“Everybody knows about that picture. Even Nico.”
Her stomach lurched. “I hate him.”
“Yeah, me too.” Sam sank onto the bed, stretching out his legs her direction. “This bed is about the only comfortable thing in this room. I think they do that so visitors don’t stay too long.”
“I wish pain meds could take away memories too.”
“No, you don’t. Don’t say that. Think of mom, idiot.”
“I guess you’re right.”
“If it makes you feel any better, I took a couple of good swings at him last night.”
“It doesn’t.”
“He didn’t even fight back. He just let me hit him, which kind of took the fun out of it.”
“Where did you see him?”
Sam huffed. “He was here. Don’t you remember? You were yelling at him to leave, but you were pretty drugged up. I told him not to come back. Ever. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll get him back for hurting you.”
For the first time, Josie noticed the knuckles of Sam’s right hand were bruised and swollen. “It isn’t your fight, Sam. It’s mine.”
“Yeah, whatever. If Isabelle wasn’t a chick, she’d be dead right now. I heard that last night, Isabelle’s guy, Ty—he dropped out a few years ago—well, he and Nico got into it. Nando says Nico put a knife in Ty, but I heard Ty showed up at work today, so who knows, you know?”
All Josie knew was that the world had never felt so dark. Eventually, she drifted off without knowing it and woke up some time later to find her mom and Sam gone. Her mom’s tableside note promised they’d be back in the morning. With nothing else to do, Josie gave in to the fog hanging over her and dozed again.
When she awoke, the sky outside was dark, the lights were dim, and Nico was in the chair next to her. She inhaled sharply at the sight of him, sending a ripple of sharp pain across her lungs.
“What are you doing here?” Using her hands for support, Josie attempted to push herself into a sitting position.
“Don’t,” he said. He was on his feet immediately, offering support by grasping her under the shoulders.
“Don’t touch me!”
He flinched at her words. After she was resting against the headboard, he let go and stepped back. “Yeah, okay.”
“Sam heard you knifed Ty. Is it true?”
Nico frowned as he stared at her. “It kills me what they did to you. Those bitches. I should’ve killed every last one of them.”
“Don’t say that.”
“Why? It’s true. If they’d been guys, they’d all be dead right now.”
“Shut up! You can’t say that. You have no right to. Not anymore. You have no idea how much I hate you.”
“I’m pretty sure I do. And believe it or not, that’s good. They’ll leave you alone now. I’ll make sure of it.”
“All this,” she said, running her hand over her body and face, “this will heal, Nico. What will never heal is seeing that—that picture…”
He stopped her by leaning forward and pressing his lips against her forehead. “You have to hate me, Josie. It’s the only way.” He sat down on the bed, facing her, his movements considerably more careful than Sam’s had been.
“What’s the only way?”
“Promise me one thing, all right? You keep your head down and keep focused and get you and Sam out of here the first chance you get.”
“What are you talking about, Nico? What are you doing?”
“My grandma, she loves you. You and Sam both. She’ll take care of you. Whatever you need.”
Josie pressed her palms against her temples as the pain resounded through her head. “Whatever idiot plan you’ve got cooked up, drop it.”
“The thing is, I can’t risk anything like that happening to you again. Ever.” He leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers without applying pressure.
Josie turned her head and pushed him back from her. “Tell me what you’re planning. Please.”
“There’s just two more things I can tell you. The first—the first is that I love you. I have since you knocked on my door in the middle of the night back when I was too much of a kid to understand what it meant. I know you know it, but I thought you should hear it aloud in case you’re tempted to forget it.”
He stood up and dragged a hand through his hair. “I don’t know if I should tell you to take care of Sam or Sam to take care of you, but I guess you’ve always been best together, anyway.”
Josie wanted to run after him as he headed for the door, but she was hooked up to an IV. Besides, when Nico made up his mind, there was no stopping him.
“So that’s it?”
He turned toward her and smiled a thin, foreign smile. His expression had become cold and impenetrable so fast it was startling. “No, there’s still that second thing. That picture of Jena and me—you should know she wasn’t the first. She won’t be the last either. That’s the thing about life on the streets, Josie. There’s always bitches to keep you company.”
Then he turned and walked out of her life completely.
Chapter 16
Josie shifted the purple gift bag from one hand to the other as she waited under the shade of a towering walnut tree that had dropped hundreds of ripening walnut husks along the road, grass,
and sidewalk. The large group of parents who’d come to see their kids off this morning was absent this afternoon.
The only other people waiting were three moms huddled in a circle near the stop sign. Their voices were low and intimate, and Josie knew by their hushed “Nos!” and “I-had-no-ideas” that they were exchanging bits of juicy gossip. Aside from offering a quick hello, Josie had no interest in getting to know them better.
She recognized the trio from the tea garden. They’d lunched there several times last year while their kids were at school. Two of the women ordered the lowest-calorie offerings on the menu, complained about the taste as they ate, and rarely finished their plates. The third woman, who was hardly any less fit than the other two, ordered something carb-laden while profusely apologizing for her lack of willpower.
When the bus finally pulled around the corner, Josie scanned the windows for sign of Zoe. A weight lifted when she caught her beaming down from one of the front windows while the bus screeched to a lumbering stop. Zoe clambered down the big steps—her narwhal backpack making her look small and big at the same time—and Josie’s throat grew tight.
“How’s my girl?” She squeezed her. “I can’t wait to hear all about your first day, you first grader!”
Zoe was grinning ear to ear when she pulled out of the hug. “I love Ms. Richards. She’s the best teacher in the world! And she’s so beautiful. And I have a best friend too.”
“Oh, really? What’s her name?”
“It’s a boy. His name is Andrew. And he didn’t have a dad, either, but now he does. He has a big sister too. I wish I did. Oh, and I got a green apple for being good.” Zoe locked hands with her as they headed toward Myra’s. “It’s the opposite of the way I like them. You get a green apple when you’re really good. A yellow one when you’re sort of good. And a red one when you’re bad.”
Josie hoped that Zoe’s summary was marred in translation, and the school made it clear it was the student’s behavior that needed correcting, not that the child was “bad.” “Well, good for you for listening and paying attention, Zoe.”
“Everyone got a green apple today, but some of the boys should’ve gotten red ones. I told Ms. Richards that, and she said we should give them a chance, since it was everyone’s first day.”
“That sounds fair.”
“Mommy, is that for me?” Zoe asked, eyeing the bag in Josie’s hand.
“As a matter of fact, it is. Just a little something to celebrate your first day of elementary school.”
Zoe reached for the bag and pulled the handles apart, peeking inside. Her eyes lit up as she pulled out a stuffed calico kitten Josie had bought last week and kept hidden for today.
Zoe hugged it to her body. “I love it the most of all my stuffed animals! I do, I do!”
Josie laughed as they neared the house.
A hint of a frown formed on Zoe’s face as they neared the house. “Mommy, where’s Carter?”
“He’s out for a bit.”
“I know, but where?”
“Errands. And how did you know?”
“His car’s not out back. I could tell when the bus passed on that street. I can see from my window.”
“I didn’t know you paid attention to which cars were at the house.”
“It’s the best way to know if someone’s here. Unless it’s you, ’cuz you don’t have a car.”
“Huh, you have me there,” Josie said as they headed up the front steps. “Myra’s in the kitchen. She’s making you the official after-school snacks she made for her kids.”
Zoe whooped and flew up the last steps into the house. Leaving the door open behind her, she charged inside.
When Josie walked in, she spied tears twinkling in Myra’s eyes as Zoe engulfed her slim waist in a hug.
“Eeewww! Is that celery?” Zoe said as she pulled out of the hug and spied the peanut butter and celery sticks with raisins that Myra had set on a plate next to a glass of milk.
“Nope,” Myra replied. “Those are logs and they’re carrying ants and you get to eat them all up.”
Zoe wrinkled her nose. “I don’t eat ants. Even if they look like raisins.”
“How about you give it a try before you decide? After you wash your hands.”
After washing up, Zoe puckered her lips but nibbled at one tentatively. After a few more hesitant bites, she began devouring them. “Try one, Mom.”
“I had one before I left to get you. And I like them too,” Josie said, taking another one.
“Did your mom make them for you?”
“No, but I’ve had them before. At friends’ houses.”
“What did your mom look like?” Zoe asked, crunching on a celery stick and cuddling her stuffed kitten close to her with her other hand.
“Like me, I guess. Just older. That’s what everyone said who knew us.” She tensed at having to answer so coolly. Zoe knew Josie’s mom was in heaven, but that was as much as she’d been told.
Zoe’s gaze flicked to Myra. “I’m glad Myra looks like Myra. I wouldn’t want her to look like you.”
“I wouldn’t mind,” Myra said. “Your mother is beautiful.”
“So are you, Myra,” Zoe said, wiping a dab of peanut butter onto her new pants before Josie passed her a napkin.
A car rumbling onto the parking pad next to the detached garage at the back of the house caught their attention. Leaving her kitten on the table, Zoe ran outside. Josie crossed to the window as Zoe yelled out Carter’s name and dashed across the backyard. When she didn’t stop, Carter caught her in his arms. He even planted a kiss on her forehead. Watching it stabbed Josie’s heart.
“Myra, it’s only been four days and look at her.” Her fingers gripped the edge of the sink. “I tried to talk to him, but he doesn’t get it.”
“Have you considered that maybe he just sees a potentially different outcome to all this than you?”
Josie shot her a look of desperation. “Even if he does, it doesn’t mean he’s right.”
“I’m sorry, Josie, but he’s welcome to stay as long as he has a mind to. I can see the good in it, even if you can’t.”
When she looked out the window again, Carter had the blanket he’d wrapped the dog in under one arm. His free hand was locked around Zoe’s as they headed toward the house.
“I know you’re concerned, but I’m asking you to trust me.” Myra placed a hand on her shoulder, and all Josie had time to do before Zoe and Carter filed into the kitchen was offer a defeated nod.
It was Myra’s house. And even without a DNA test to prove it, Carter had just as much claim on Myra as she did. Like it or not, he was going to be a fixture here as long as he wanted.
And the thing was, a part of her did like it. More than she wanted to admit.
Carter was filling Zoe in on the story of the dog in an edited-for-a-younger-audience way, and her eyes were big and round as she listened. Josie and Myra waited as he caught Zoe up to speed and then started to talk about what he’d learned at the emergency vet clinic.
“He’s got cuts and bruises, but it’s likely he wasn’t a stray. His weight and muscle tone are good.” Carter’s bright blue-green eyes settled on Josie. “The vet suspected it’s the scenario we thought of.”
So, some asshole had fought his or her dog and dumped him. Josie wasn’t convinced there was a hell beyond what some people experienced on earth, but if there was, she hoped there was a special room for people who intentionally hurt children and animals.
“He’s sweet though,” Carter added. “Mild tempered like the best of them. No wonder he wound up like he did.”
“What’s going to happen to him?” Zoe and Myra asked in unison.
“Well, he’s there a few nights, most likely. He needed over sixty stitches, and they want to make sure he didn’t pick up a virus from another dog. The office staff is going to
be on the lookout for anyone claiming to have lost a Bernese mountain dog, in case he was yanked out of a yard or something, which happens. If no one’s found, it’ll be up to me to take him, or he’ll go to a shelter.”
“Can we keep him, please, Myra?” Zoe begged, clasping her hands in prayer.
Tidbit looked up from his cozy spot on his bed and barked, as if he understood what was on the table.
“No, Zo,” Josie answered on Myra’s behalf. “I know you’d love a dog of your own but, trust me when I tell you, this isn’t the one. Besides,” she said, looking pointedly at Carter, “Carter isn’t staying forever, and I’m betting he wouldn’t want a dog that size in New York.”
“You never know,” Carter said, refusing to take her lead. It took her a few seconds to realize she didn’t know which part of her claim he was answering, the forever part or the New York part. “But I wouldn’t mind giving him a shot—so long as he stays as gentle as he was today, which I’m betting he does.”
A short silence fell over the kitchen, and Zoe looked around at all three of them, trying to determine if things were playing out in a way that might bring a second dog into their home.
“If he stays as gentle as you say he was today,” Myra said, breaking the silence, “I’m fine with you figuring out what’s in the dog’s best interest, and in yours. But if he’s as big as Josie says, he won’t be able to roam the grounds the same way Tidbit does while customers are here. We have paying guests to think of, and not everyone is a fan of large dogs.” The way Myra’s attention turned toward Josie at the end, it was obvious who she was referring to.
“It’s hard to be a fan of big dogs when the last one you came across nearly took…someone’s head off.”
As soon as the words were out, Josie clamped her lips shut. She almost said Sam’s name. She never mentioned him aloud. She hardly allowed herself to think of him anymore. She needed to find the courage to start though. No matter how badly it tore her apart. Zoe was getting old enough to learn the truth. Old enough to start hearing his stories.
Just not today.
“Look, Josie, whatever experience you had, I’m sorry, but this dog…trust me,” Carter said. “I know dogs, and this one is going to be spectacular.”