The Sound and the Fury

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The Sound and the Fury Page 14

by William Faulkner


  “If that hamper is in his way, Mr MacKenzie, move it over on your side. I brought a hamper of wine because I think young gentlemen should drink wine, although my father, Gerald’s grandfather” ever do that Have you ever done that In the gray darkness a little light her hands locked about

  “They do, when they can get it,” Spoade said. “Hey, Shreve?” her knees her face looking at the sky the smell of honeysuckle upon her face and throat

  “Beer, too,” Shreve said. His hand touched my knee again. I moved my knee again. like a thin wash of lilac colored paint talking about him bringing

  “You’re not a gentleman,” Spoade said. him between us until the shape of her blurred not with dark

  “No. I’m Canadian,” Shreve said. talking about him the oar blades winking him along winking the Cap made for motoring in England and all time rushing beneath and they two blurred within the other forever more he had been in the army had killed men

  “I adore Canada,” Miss Daingerfield said. “I think it’s marvellous.”

  “Did you ever drink perfume?” Spoade said. with one hand he could lift her to his shoulder and run with her running Running

  “No,” Shreve said. running the beast with two backs and she blurred in the winking oars running the swine of Euboeleus running coupled within how many Caddy

  “Neither did I,” Spoade said. I dont know too many there was something terrible in me terrible in me Father I have committed Have you ever done that We didnt we didnt do that did we do that

  “and Gerald’s grandfather always picked his own mint before breakfast, while the dew was still on it. He wouldn’t even let old Wilkie touch it do you remember Gerald but always gathered it himself and made his own julep. He was as crotchety about his julep as an old maid, measuring everything by a recipe in his head. There was only one man he ever gave that recipe to; that was” we did how can you not know it if youll just wait Ill tell you how it was it was a crime we did a terrible crime it cannot be hid you think it can but wait Poor Quentin youve never done that have you and Ill tell you how it was Ill tell Father then itll have to be because you love Father then well have to go away amid the pointing and the horror the clean flame Ill make you say we did Im stronger than you Ill make you know we did you thought it was them but it was me listen I fooled you all the time it was me you thought I was in the house where that damn honeysuckle trying not to think the swing the cedars the secret surges the breathing locked drinking the wild breath the yes Yes Yes yes

  “never be got to drink wine himself, but he always said that a hamper what book did you read that in the one where Gerald’s rowing suit of wine was a necessary part of any gentlemen’s picnic basket” did you love them Caddy did you love them When they touched me I died

  one minute she was standing there the next he was yelling and pulling at her dress they went into the hall and up the stairs yelling and shoving at her up the stairs to the bathroom door and stopped her back against the door and her arm across her face yelling and trying to shove her into the bathroom when she came in to supper T. P. was feeding him he started again just whimpering at first until she touched him then he yelled she stood there her eyes like cornered rats then I was running in the gray darkness it smelled of rain and all flower scents the damp warm air released and crickets sawing away in the grass pacing me with a small travelling island of silence Fancy watched me across the fence blotchy like a quilt on a line I thought damn that nigger he forgot to feed her again I ran down the hill in that vacuum of crickets like a breath travelling across a mirror she was lying in the water her head on the sand spit the water flowing about her hips there was a little more light in the water her skirt half saturated flopped along her flanks to the waters motion in heavy ripples going nowhere renewed themselves of their own movement I stood on the bank I could smell the honeysuckle on the water gap the air seemed to drizzle with honeysuckle and with the rasping of crickets a substance you could feel on the flesh

  is Benjy still crying

  I dont know yes I dont know

  poor Benjy

  I sat down on the bank the grass was damp a little then I found my shoes wet

  get out of that water are you crazy

  but she didnt move her face was a white blur framed out of the blur of the sand by her hair

  get out now

  she sat up then she rose her skirt flopped against her draining she climbed the bank her clothes flopping sat down

  why dont you wring it out do you want to catch cold

  yes

  the water sucked and gurgled across the sand spit and on in the dark among the willows across the shallow the water rippled like a piece of cloth holding still a little light as water does

  hes crossed all the oceans all around the world

  then she talked about him clasping her wet knees her face tilted back in the gray light the smell of honeysuckle there was a light in mothers room and in Benjys where T. P. was putting him to bed

  do you love him

  her hand came out I didnt move it fumbled down my arm and she held my hand flat against her chest her heart thudding

  no no

  did he make you then he made you do it let him he was stronger than you and he tomorrow Ill kill him I swear I will father neednt know until afterward and then you and I nobody need ever know we can take my school money we can cancel my matriculation Caddy you hate him dont you dont you

  she held my hand against her chest her heart thudding I turned and caught her arm

  Caddy you hate him dont you

  she moved my hand up against her throat her heart was hammering there

  poor Quentin

  her face looked at the sky it was low so low that all smells and sounds of night seemed to have been crowded down like under a slack tent especially the honeysuckle it had got into my breathing it was on her face and throat like paint her blood pounded against my hand I was leaning on my other arm it began to jerk and jump and I had to pant to get any air at all out of that thick gray honeysuckle

  yes I hate him I would die for him Ive already died for him I die for him over and over again everytime this goes

  when I lifted my hand I could still feel crisscrossed twigs and grass burning into the palm

  poor Quentin

  she leaned back on her arms her hands locked about her knees

  youve never done that have you

  what done what

  that what I have what I did

  yes yes lots of times with lots of girls

  then I was crying her hand touched me again and I was crying against her damp blouse then she lying on her back looking past my head into the sky I could see a rim of white under her irises I opened my knife

  do you remember the day damuddy died when you sat down in the water in your drawers

  yes

  I held the point of the knife at her throat

  it wont take but a second just a second then I can do

  mine I can do mine then

  all right can you do yours by yourself

  yes the blades long enough Benjys in bed by now

  yes

  it wont take but a second Ill try not to hurt

  all right

  will you close your eyes

  no like this youll have to push it harder

  touch your hand to it

  but she didnt move her eyes were wide open looking past

  my head at the sky

  Caddy do you remember how Dilsey fussed at you because your drawers were muddy

  dont cry

  Im not crying Caddy

  push it are you going to

  do you want me to

  yes push it

  touch your hand to it

  dont cry poor Quentin

  but I couldnt stop she held my head against her damp hard breast I could hear her heart going firm and slow now not hammering and the water gurgling among the willows in the dark and waves of honeysuckle coming up the air my arm and shoulder were twisted under me
>
  what is it what are you doing

  her muscles gathered I sat up

  its my knife I dropped it

  she sat up

  what time is it

  I dont know

  she rose to her feet I fumbled along the ground

  Im going let it go

  to the house

  I could feel her standing there I could smell her damp clothes feeling her there

  its right here somewhere

  let it go you can find it tomorrow come on

  wait a minute Ill find it

  are you afraid to

  here it is it was right here all the time

  was it come on

  I got up and followed we went up the hill the crickets hushing before us

  its funny how you can sit down and drop something and have to hunt all around for it

  the gray it was gray with dew slanting up into the gray sky then the trees beyond

  damn that honeysuckle I wish it would stop

  you used to like it

  we crossed the crest and went on toward the trees she walked into me she gave over a little the ditch was a black scar on the gray grass she walked into me again she looked at me and gave over we reached the ditch

  lets go this way

  what for

  lets see if you can still see Nancys bones I havent thought to look in a long time have you

  it was matted with vines and briers dark

  they were right here you cant tell whether you see them or not can you

  stop Quentin

  come on

  the ditch narrowed closed she turned toward the trees

  stop Quentin

  Caddy

  I got in front of her again

  Caddy

  stop it

  I held her

  Im stronger than you

  she was motionless hard unyielding but still

  I wont fight stop youd better stop

  Caddy dont Caddy

  it wont do any good dont you know it wont let me go

  the honeysuckle drizzled and drizzled I could hear the crickets watching us in a circle she moved back went around me on toward the trees

  you go on back to the house you neednt come

  I went on

  why dont you go on back to the house

  damn that honeysuckle

  we reached the fence she crawled through I crawled through when I rose from stooping he was coming out of the trees into the gray toward us coming toward us tall and flat and still even moving like he was still she went to him

  this is Quentin Im wet Im wet all over you dont have to if you dont want to

  their shadows one shadow her head rose it was above his on the sky higher their two heads

  you dont have to if you dont want to

  then not two heads the darkness smelled of rain of damp grass and leaves the gray light drizzling like rain the honeysuckle coming up in damp waves I could see her face a blur against his shoulder he held her in one arm like she was no bigger than a child he extended his hand

  glad to know you

  we shook hands then we stood there her shadow high against his shadow one shadow

  whatre you going to do Quentin

  walk a while I think Ill go through the woods to the road and come back through town

  I turned away going

  goodnight

  Quentin

  I stopped

  what do you want

  in the woods the tree frogs were going smelling rain in the air they sounded like toy music boxes that were hard to turn and the honeysuckle

  come here

  what do you want

  come here Quentin

  I went back she touched my shoulder leaning down her shadow the blur of her face leaning down from his high shadow I drew back

  look out

  you go on home

  Im not sleepy Im going to take a walk

  wait for me at the branch

  Im going for a walk

  Ill be there soon wait for me you wait

  no Im going through the woods

  I didnt look back the tree frogs didnt pay me any mind the gray light like moss in the trees drizzling but still it wouldnt rain after a while I turned went back to the edge of the woods as soon as I got there I began to smell honeysuckle again I could see the lights on the courthouse clock and the glare of town the square on the sky and the dark willows along the branch and the light in mothers windows the light still on in Benjys room and I stooped through the fence and went across the pasture running I ran in the gray grass among the crickets the honeysuckle getting stronger and stronger and the smell of water then I could see the water the color of gray honeysuckle I lay down on the bank with my face close to the ground so I couldnt smell the honeysuckle I couldnt smell it then and I lay there feeling the earth going through my clothes listening to the water and after a while I wasnt breathing so hard and I lay there thinking that if I didnt move my face I wouldnt have to breathe hard and smell it and then I wasnt thinking about anything at all she came along the bank and stopped I didnt move

  its late you go on home

  what

  you go on home its late

  all right

  her clothes rustled I didnt move they stopped rustling

  are you going in like I told you

  I didnt hear anything

  Caddy

  yes I will if you want me to I will

  I sat up she was sitting on the ground her hands clasped about her knee

  go on to the house like I told you

  yes Ill do anything you want me to anything yes

  she didnt even look at me I caught her shoulder and shook her hard

  you shut up

  I shook her

  you shut up you shut up

  yes

  she lifted her face then I saw she wasnt even looking at me at all I could see that white rim

  get up

  I pulled her she was limp I lifted her to her feet

  go on now

  was Benjy still crying when you left

  go on

  we crossed the branch the roof came in sight then the windows upstairs

  hes asleep now

  I had to stop and fasten the gate she went on in the gray light the smell of rain and still it wouldnt rain and suckle beginning to come from the garden fence beginning she went into the shadow I could hear her feet then

  Caddy

  I stopped at the steps I couldnt hear her feet

  Caddy

  I heard her feet then my hand touched her not warm not cool just still her clothes a little damp still

  do you love him now

  not breathing except slow like far away breathing

  Caddy do you love him now

  I dont know

  outside the gray light the shadows of things like dead things in stagnant water

  I wish you were dead

  do you you coming in now

  are you thinking about him now

  I dont know

  tell me what youre thinking about tell me

  stop stop Quentin

  you shut up you shut up you hear me you shut up are you going to shut up

  all right I will stop well make too much noise

  Ill kill you do you hear

  lets go out to the swing theyll hear you here

  Im not crying do you say Im crying

  no hush now well wake Benjy up

  you go on into the house go on now

  I am dont cry Im bad anyway you cant help it

  theres a curse on us its not our fault is it our fault

  hush come on and go to bed now

  you cant make me theres a curse on us

  finally I saw him he was just going into the barbershop he looked out I went on and waited

  Ive been looking for you two or three days

  you wanted to see me

  Im going to see you

  he rolled the cigarette quickly with a
bout two motions he struck the match with his thumb

  we cant talk here suppose I meet you somewhere

  Ill come to your room are you at the hotel

  no thats not so good you know that bridge over the creek

  in there back of

  yes all right

  at one oclock right

  yes

  I turned away

  Im obliged to you

  look

  I stopped looked back

  she all right

  he looked like he was made out of bronze his khaki shirt

  she need me for anything now

  Ill be there at one

  she heard me tell T. P. to saddle Prince at one oclock she kept watching me not eating much she came too

  what are you going to do

  nothing cant I go for a ride if I want to

  youre going to do something what is it

  none of your business whore whore

  T. P. had Prince at the side door

  I wont want him Im going to walk

  I went down the drive and out the gate I turned into the lane then I ran before I reached the bridge I saw him leaning on the rail the horse was hitched in the woods he looked over his shoulder then he turned his back he didnt look up until I came onto the bridge and stopped he had a piece of bark in his hands breaking pieces from it and dropping them over the rail into the water

  I came to tell you to leave town

  he broke a piece of bark deliberately dropped it carefully into the water watched it float away

  I said you must leave town

  he looked at me

  did she send you to me

  I say you must go not my father not anybody I say it

 

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