Rumblin' Knights Boxed Set

by Bella Jewel

“I can’t promise you won’t feel it again,” I tell him, smiling warmly. “After all, I’m incredibly clumsy and have a way of getting myself into trouble.”

  He snorts in agreement. “Indeed, you do, but try not to.”

  “I promise,” I say to him.

  It feels good.

  Warm.

  Real.

  Nicolai and me.

  It feels like it’s going in the right direction, like it’s just meant to be, and that’s an incredible feeling.

  A feeling I didn’t know I needed until now.

  A feeling I’m going to hold onto with both hands.

  For as long as I possibly can.

  ~*~*~*~

  “Seriously?” Shania gasps, lying in my hospital bed beside me, a bowl of M&M’s between us, much to my nurses’ dismay.

  I swore I’d only have a couple, and I have, but it feels so nice to have my sister beside me, talking like we used to, that I don’t care what any nurse says or thinks. I’m going to do what I like.

  To a degree, of course.

  “Yep, seriously,” I say, throwing an M&M into my mouth and crunching down on the outer shell, loving how it dissolves in my mouth.

  Yum.

  “So the reason Nicolai changed his name is because of a woman! A wife!”

  “Yep,” I answer. “Apparently she wanted to take him for everything, things got ugly, she got some crazy man in her life, ran off the rails, and even hurt his sister.”

  “They hurt his sister?” she gasps. “My gosh, that’s horrible. What sort of woman is she?”

  “Not a very nice one, by the sounds.”

  “It kind of explains why he wasn’t a big fan of women when I met him. I mean, he was seeing Yana, but he treated her like crap. It makes sense why. Not that it was the right thing to do, but still …”

  Hearing Yana’s name brings a pang of jealousy to my chest, and I’m not honestly sure why? Maybe because she’s so incredibly beautiful, and she can dance on that pole like she was born to do it, and she’s utterly perfect in every way. The thought of her and Nicolai being together bothers me, but I won’t let it get to me.

  The past is the past.

  “Yeah, you’re right, he didn’t need to be a douche,” I agree. “But I can see why he was a little scarred from women. She sounds like a nutcase.”

  “So she doesn’t know where he is?” Shania asks. “Or about Tommy?”

  “No, not as far as he knows. He said he wants a divorce, but he’s avoided it because it could mean she’d find out where he is, and he’s changed his name now so the process is quite lengthy.”

  “Yeah, I can imagine so. I’m kind of glad he’s chosen to stay away, that woman sounds like bad news. Anyone that can have another person hurt, for their own gain, has something wrong with them.”

  I nod, eating another chocolate. “Yeah, then he had Yana, so he hasn’t had the best run of girls.”

  “And me,” Shania says.

  I go silent, but she laughs and nudges me. “It’s okay, I know I wasn’t easy to deal with. I know I certainly made things complicated for him.”

  “We all live and learn,” I tell her. “At least now it’s over and done with, and you’re all getting along. Mostly, we’re getting along.”

  She nods, and leans back into my pillow. “This pillow is horrible!”

  I laugh, leaning back too. “I know, they’re all horrible!”

  “My god, I wouldn’t let my worst enemy lay on this brick.” She giggles.

  I snort and then say, “Well, I’m honestly pretty well drugged, so I tend not to notice.”

  We both fall silent for a moment, and Shania turns to me, slightly, and says, “For what it’s worth, honey, I am really sorry.”

  I exhale, and smile at her. “Me too. I wasn’t exactly an innocent party. I knew that it was wrong, but I found myself struggling to stay away.”

  “Can I ask you something?” she asks, putting her hands beneath her face as she faces me.

  “Yeah, shoot.”

  “How did it happen?”

  I was wondering how long it would take her to ask this question, I know it would have been one of the first things I asked if it were me in her shoes. I mean, in the end, it all comes down to how it happened, right?

  “Honestly, it’s hard to know what exactly changed my mind. One minute I was there apologizing to him, and then we just started talking. He told me his side of the story, but the conversation, it flowed so well, I really didn’t expect it. One minute we were enemies, the next we kind of became friends. I got a little too drunk, he told me to stay for dinner, one thing led to another … and you know the rest. I tried to avoid him, I did, but he was persistent.”

  Shania nods. “I must admit, I didn’t believe he wanted you for anything more than a bit of fun, until I saw him when you passed out today. It was terrifying, but his face, he was so afraid. I could truly see he cared for you, and I realized how wrong I have been. If I’m being honest, I guess part of me was jealous, because it was hard seeing that he was so drawn to you, and I had to fight so long for his attention. It’s not that I have anything lingering for him, because I don’t, but it made me feel silly that I was so pathetic back then.”

  “You weren’t pathetic, Shan,” I say to her, smiling warmly. “You were young, and you liked him. You were also in a confusing situation. Pathetic is far from the word I’d use to describe you. We’ve all done stupid shit when it comes to men, we’ve all had men who don’t like us, and we’ve all learned from it. You’re not the only girl out there wondering why Nicolai didn’t like you. Every man has one of those girls somewhere.”

  “You’re right about that,” she says. “And besides, if it weren’t for Nicolai, I never would have had Tommy, or found Lincoln, so I’m not complaining.”

  “Exactly.” I grin. “Things work out how they’re supposed to, I truly believe that.”

  She nods. “Do you think his ex-wife will show up again in the picture? I’m worried, you know, with Tommy …”

  I nod, understanding. I’d be worried too. It sounds like she’s severely unstable, and that’s concerning in itself. Let alone when they have a son that could be involved.

  “I hope not,” I say, and mean it, because I genuinely hope not. “It sounds like she’s not a very nice person at all.”

  “No, psycho is starting to be the word I’m thinking would be describe her.”

  “Yep.”

  We talk for a few more hours until Shania is exhausted and tells me she’s going home to sleep. She leaves, and I smile, I truly smile, because finally things are working out. Finally, things are coming into place. Finally, everything is how it’s supposed to be.

  But I should know by now, never to get too excited about these things.

  There is always something lurking in the shadows.

  12

  NOW – LUCY

  It took a month to fully recover from my operation. And it was a long damned month. I have no doubt I drove Nicolai up the wall with how much sulking I did, but hell, I was bored out of my brain and he was at work, and everyone was busy. Damon copped a lot of my whining, but he dealt with it like a champ, always visiting me.

  I started back at work this week, and it feels good to get out again.

  Everything feels really good, if I’m being honest. Nicolai and I are going well, and I absolutely adore spending time with him and Tommy. Shania is happy, and we’re seeing each other again, and everything feels like it’s finally falling into place. It’s about time, too, if I do say so myself.

  It’s Nicolai’s birthday today, and I’ve decided to go and surprise him at work, maybe do a little strip tease for him. He’s busy at the club tonight, so it’s the only option I have if I want to spend time with him. I’ve rallied up the help of Erin and Ellie to get me all dolled up so I can go knock his socks off.

  But first, Damon and I are doing lunch, he’s been a little quiet lately, and I want to know what’s going on, or better yet … who. />
  There has to be a who!

  I wonder if it’s the girl I saw him talking to the day of Tommy’s party?

  Either way, I love a bit of juicy gossip.

  I agreed to meet him at a local hamburger place at noon, and when I arrive, he’s already there. He’s sitting back in his chair, staring around, looking absolutely gorgeous. Whoever the girl is that gets him, she’s going to be super lucky.

  He smiles when he notices me, and I grin, waving furiously as I approach the table and take a seat.

  “Bestie!” I smile, leaning forward with a grin. “How are you?”

  “I’m good,” he says, smiling back. “You? How did your week at work go?”

  “Slow,” I tell him. “Honestly, it hurt quite a bit getting around, but I managed. Nicolai would have rathered I took another week off, but I told him we’ll be getting a pre-divorce if I had to stay cooped up for one more week.”

  Damon laughs. “Typical woman, you all never stop.”

  “Speaking of women.” I wiggle my brows. “How’s it going for you? Anyone special? Anyone I should know about?”

  “Even if there was, I’d probably never tell you in fear you’d scare the poor girl off.”

  I gasp and place a hand to my chest. “I’d never! We’d probably become besties, too, and then we’d all be like this tight, happy little group.”

  Damon groans. “Fuck me, that’s a terrifying thought.”

  I laugh. “Come on now, I’m okay!”

  He smiles, genuinely. “Yeah, you are.”

  “Stop changing the subject, anyway. Is there someone? Tell me. I know when something is going on with you, you don’t text me as much.”

  He rolls his eyes. “I’m not your boyfriend, I don’t have to text you all day, and maybe there is someone.”

  I squeal happily, making people stop and look. “Firstly, I’m your bestie, same rules apply, you have to text me, and secondly, oh my god! Who is it? What’s her name? Do I know her?”

  “It’s nothing serious, calm down.” He laughs. “But yeah you would know her, kind of, she’s friends with Amalie.”

  “So it is the girl from the park the other day, what’s her name again?”

  I can’t remember honestly if Ellie told me or not, I was in so much pain that day, it’s all a blur.

  “Penny.”

  “Penny.” I clap. “That’s so cool. Oh, she was with Boston wasn’t she? That’s right.”

  “Sort of yeah, not really though. Had a shitty ex-husband, had a hard time, the club was helping her and she and Boston got close, but it didn’t work out. She found that life a little too much for her.”

  I nod. “Understandable, too. It isn’t for everyone. So, are you two dating? Have you made it official? Ohhh, have you had sex?”

  He groans again. “Stop it, woman. No, I haven’t had sex with her, it’s only new, we’re just talking. I’m taking her out tonight.”

  “You are?” I cry, throwing my hands in the air. “Oh, this is so exciting! Where are you taking her?”

  “Does it matter?” he grunts.

  “Absolutely it matters, you have to make a good impression. Now tell me, where?”

  “That new Italian restaurant.”

  “Ohhhh, I know that one. I forget the name, but it’s supposed to be really nice.”

  He shrugs.

  “Stop acting all macho, you must be excited?”

  “I don’t get excited too soon, we’ll see how it goes.”

  I smile. “Well, I’m happy for you, really I am. This is really great.”

  “Thanks. Now, tell me how things are going for you?”

  “Good,” I say, leaning back in the chair, “it’s Nicolai’s birthday today, and I’m going to surprise him at the club.”

  “Surprise him how?” Damon asks.

  “Oh, you know, wear something sexy beneath my clothes, take him to a back room somewhere, knock his socks off.”

  Damon raises his brows. “Kinky. Does he suspect you’re coming?”

  “Nope. That’s the best part.”

  “You sure you want to go waltzing into his strip club without warning him?”

  I frown. “Why wouldn’t I?”

  Damon shrugs. “Just asking.”

  I cross my arms. “You’re not just asking. Why wouldn’t I, Damon?”

  “Most girls probably wouldn’t feel okay with their man running a strip club, I mean, you don’t know what happens behind closed doors. What if you see something you don’t want to see?”

  Anger bubbles in my chest.

  Always assuming Nicolai is a dick and will cheat.

  That’s what they all think.

  “He’s not a cheater, Damon,” I snap.

  “You don’t know that,” he throws back. “Shania is adamant she caught him with that other bird more than once when he was with her. How do you know he’s not doing it? I’m not saying he is, but I just want you to be careful. I care about what happens to you.”

  “You don’t like him,” I grind out. “I know you don’t like him. But that doesn’t make him a cheater, Damon.”

  “Stop saying my name like that,” he growls. “I’m not saying he’s a cheater, I’m saying be careful.”

  I’m angry now, frustrated and angry. He’s assuming before even knowing. I know he cares about me, but I’m also tired of everyone telling me that Nicolai is going to hurt me and it’ll all end badly for me.

  Nobody has any faith in me.

  “I’m not an idiot, you know,” I snap, shaking my head. “I don’t put myself in positions with people I don’t trust. You don’t need to like Nicolai, but you’re just looking for a reason to hate him, looking for a reason to say I told you so. You’re supposed to be my friend, you’re not supposed to judge me.”

  “He’s hurt you before,” Damon points out. “Chances are he can do it again.”

  “You’re being a real dick, Damon.”

  “Why,” he snaps, “because I’m telling you the truth? Because I’m pointing out something you refuse to see?”

  “And what’s that?”

  “Nicolai isn’t to be trusted. He’s been a dick in the past, more than once!”

  “That’s Shania’s opinion, not mine, or yours. You don’t know him well enough to assume that,” I yell.

  “I can see it, I don’t need to assume it.”

  “Screw you, Damon,” I say, my voice full of the hurt I’m feeling. I stand and grab my phone. “I’m leaving.”

  I turn and walk out without looking back.

  My heart is aching.

  It feels like all I do is constantly explain myself. Constantly defend myself. Nobody is willing to give Nicolai a chance because of how Shania feels about him. Hell, even she’s giving him more of a go. I am always spending my time trying to explain to them that he’s not such a bad person and that they should at least get to know him before judging.

  Everyone else, I get, but Damon … that hurts coming from him. I know he’s seen the worst of it, I know he’s seen me hurt and I can understand why he’s wary, but the way he’s talking is as if he knows it’ll happen and refuses to see it any other way. As my friend, he should be a little more understanding.

  I force back the tears as I reach my car and throw the door open.

  It’s the same thing over and over.

  One step forward.

  Two steps backward.

  13

  NOW – LUCY

  I am dressed up to the hills.

  I’m wearing a long, sexy coat that is good enough to get into the clubs with, because it fully buttons and ties up and looks like it’s made for going out. Beneath it, though, I’m wearing this sexy little outfit, with stockings up to my thighs, no panties, and a tight corset. I know Nicolai will love it. I’m incredibly nervous. It’s very hard to pull off being sexy to a man that sees strippers for a living but, still, I know he sees me differently and he’ll adore this.

  I get to the club as soon as it opens around ten and make
my way over to the bouncer at the base of the stairs. Nicolai’s office is upstairs, so I have to go through the strip club to get to it. The bouncer knows who I am now. Nicolai told me anytime I want to come in, he’s made sure they’ll let me up. I’m nervous, my chest tight, my tummy fluttering with butterflies.

  I’ve not done something like this before, something sexy, something that really exposes myself. I’m opening myself up to him, giving myself all of him. I’m not a stripper, hell, I’m clumsy as hell, so dancing sexy, that’s not something that comes easy to me. When I practiced in front of the mirror, I ended up in hysterics, so it’s safe to say I’m not overly confident I’ll pull this off.

  But it’s his birthday and, man, I can’t wait to see him.

  Smiling like a kid on Christmas, I approach the bouncer at the stairs. He must know who I am, because he smiles back.

  “You look happy tonight,” he says, eyeing my sexy coat, and then his grin gets bigger. “Boss man’s birthday today … I’m guessing you’re his present?”

  “Is it that obvious?” I laugh.

  “He’s a lucky man,” he tells me, unclipping the rope so I can go up. “Last time I checked he was in his office. I’ll make sure nobody disturbs you.”

  I flush, thanking him before walking up the stairs. Like last time, the atmosphere really changes when you come up here—gone is the thumping club, replacing it a rich stench of sex and masculinity. I skip past the main area of the club and go left to where Nicolai’s office is. I reach the door and take a deep, shaky breath. I’m nervous, no doubt about it. I don’t know how he’s going to take this, all I know is I’m here now and I can’t back out without looking stupid.

  I take the handle and open the door softly.

  The moment it’s opened, what is in front of me is not Nicolai. No, what is in front of me is fucking Yana. Yana, half fucking naked, dancing. She’s dancing. Nicolai is sitting on the sofa, back to the door. I can’t see what he’s doing, all I can see is that he’s sitting there, watching her. With her gorgeous body. With her perfect fucking tits. With her sexy dance that really reminds me that mine was absolutely fucking crap.

  I’m nothing compared to that.

  No way in the world can I compete.