Escaping the Past

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Escaping the Past Page 11

by Tammy Falkner


  “Brody, if you had seen her…” John began.

  “Save it, John,” Brody chuckled. Then he asked, “Sadie, is Mom okay with the power out?”

  “I just checked on her. Lola is sleeping in there tonight and all her machines are on battery power. She should be just fine. You could go and see her, but she would just sleep right through it.”

  “I won’t bother her, then.”

  “Guys, I hate to do it, but I think I’m going to get Sarah to bed and eat my sandwich upstairs. I’m tired,” Lou said as she stretched slowly. “I’ll carry her up and then I’ll come back for it.”

  Brody asked, “You said she’s a deep sleeper. Will she stay asleep if I go and pick her up? If so, I’ll carry her while you carry the food and a couple of flashlights.”

  Lou smiled her thanks and shrugged her aching shoulders. “If you don’t mind, that would be great. She always feels heavier when she’s asleep.”

  Lou followed Brody to Jeb and Sadie’s room, guided by a flashlight, and pulled the covers back. Sarah stirred but didn’t wake. Brody picked her up gently and held her against his chest. Her legs automatically wrapped around his waist as her arms encircled his neck. “She hangs on like a leech, huh?” he asked, slightly uncomfortable.

  “If it’s too much trouble, I’ll carry her myself,” Lou stated, her hands on her hips.

  “Don’t go getting your back up, Lou.” He grunted as he shifted her. “I got her.”

  Lou brushed the dark hair from Sarah’s eyes and Sarah snuggled deeper into Brody’s chest. Brody followed Lou and the light back down the hallway. When they got to the kitchen, Lou grabbed two bottles of water, the two plates, and another flashlight.

  “Night, guys,” she called over her shoulder, as they started at the stairs.

  “Night,” three voices chimed back.

  Lou followed Brody up the stairs, shining the flashlight in his path. “Don’t drop my baby,” she requested.

  “If you’ll keep that light on the stairs, I won’t,” he grunted.

  Lou perfected her aim and Brody sighed his thanks.

  She opened the door to her bedroom, laid the plates on her desk, and led him through the bathroom to the adjoining nursery. The room had been converted to a little girl’s dream room when Sarah was four and was “too big for baby stuff.” The room was now full of pink frills, princesses, and lace. It was beautiful even though it was shrouded in shadows. Ballet tutus had been sewn by Sadie and served as valances on the windows. A bookshelf donned one wall with its lower shelves full of books and the upper shelves filled with fragile trinkets Sarah loved.

  Lou pulled back the covers and sheets and Brody gently laid Sarah down. She never moved but sighed loudly as he moved away. Lou pulled just the sheets up to her chin because it was a warm night and kissed her on the forehead. She placed an extra flashlight on the nightstand by the bed. She left it on just in case Sarah woke and was confused.

  They walked back into Lou’s room and Brody picked up his plate and bottle of water. Lou said, “Thanks for bringing her up. She’s heavier than she looks.”

  “Tell me about it,” Brody pretended to flex his back.

  “You stop,” Lou teased as she touched his arm.

  Brody gestured to her plate that still lay on the desk. “Come out on the porch and eat with me?”

  “Sure…why not?” She followed him through the door and onto the porch. They sat, side by side, in the rocking chairs. Lou dove into her sandwich with relish. Brody laughed at her antics and did the same.

  “Where did you learn to be such a good mother?” he asked out of the blue, his mouth full of sandwich.

  “I didn’t know I was one,” Lou replied, shrugging her shoulders. “I just do the best I can. It’s hard for her, sometimes, not having a dad. But, most of the time, she has enough family to make up for it. I didn’t know squat when she and I first came here. Sadie had to teach me a lot.”

  “You learned from the best, then.”

  “Absolutely.”

  They ate in silence for a few minutes.

  “How long do you plan to stay, Brody? I mean…afterward.”

  “Not long. I have a life and work to get back to. I love it here and wish I could stay longer, but all I have ever wanted to be is a doctor. Back home, I get to be a doctor while I never could be one here.”

  “Why couldn’t you be one here?”

  “My dad wouldn’t allow it. No son of his was going to waste his time doctoring when there was real work to be done. So, he took away my choice. He said I could either be his son or I could be a doctor. I couldn’t let him take my choice away, so I let him take my family instead.”

  “Was it worth it?” she asked gently.

  “I have always thought so but, being back here, I’m not so sure. I do know though that I still won’t let anyone take my choices away from me.”

  “Having Sarah wasn’t a choice I would have made for myself, either. Just so you know.” She looked almost guilty as she said it. “Those first few days, I wasn’t sure if I could make it. I was tired, irritable and overwhelmed. But it was all worth it. She’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m glad that’s one choice I didn’t have. It seemed like it was just thrust into my lap. Second best thing that ever happened to me was finding this family.”

  She munched on her pickle after the sandwich disappeared from her plate. She looked over at his plate. “You going to eat that pickle?”

  “I was planning on it,” he replied.

  “Sure?” She ogled it some more.

  “Oh, here! Good grief!” He passed it over. “Who could resist you with those sad, little puppy dog eyes?” He paused briefly. Then his tone changed. “You do have beautiful eyes, you know.”

  She stopped in mid-bite. “My eyes are ordinary. They’re brown—plain, ol’, ordinary brown. When I was young, I wanted blue eyes or glasses, anything that would make me stand out.”

  He appraised her from head to toe. “You stand out pretty well, already, Lou.”

  “Stop. I mean it. I’m ordinary.”

  He grabbed her chin lightly with his hand and tipped her face toward the moonlight. “In this light, they are the color of mahogany. That deep and dark wood has a ton of strength and can withstand almost anything you throw at it. That’s what you remind me of.”

  Lou snorted. “My mother always said I had eyes the color of a beer bottle.”

  Brody laughed loudly. “A beer bottle? Boy, was she imaginative! That’s about as flattering as comparing them to an A-1 Steak Sauce bottle, huh?” His look became more serious. “She wasn’t thinking clearly. It is really what’s behind the eyes that matter.”

  His steely gray eyes met hers. Lou looked away nervously. Brody lightened the mood by leaning back in his rocker and singing out the lyrics to Brown Eyed Girl.

  Lou grinned wildly. “God, I love that song! I always thought it was written just for me.”

  He stopped singing momentarily. “Did a lot of laughing and running, skipping and jumping, huh? Or was it hearts a-thumping?” he joked.

  “Laughing and running. I never did a lot of hearts a-thumping.” Not ‘til recently, she thought.

  “I bet you danced to that song at every school dance,” he teased.

  “Nope. Never danced to it even once,” she responded.

  He got up from his chair and extended a hand to her. “We’ll just have to change that, won’t we?”

  “Oh, no. Absolutely not!” She laughed nervously.

  “Come on…I can tell you want to.” He took her hand and gently pulled her from the chair. She rose cautiously and regarded him from beneath lowered lashes.

  Brody started to sing quietly as he pulled her close to him. He held one hand in his and put the other on his shoulder. He pulled her close, but not close enough that their bodies touched. He swayed with her to the tune in his head.

  Lou, slightly embarrassed, looked down at her feet. He touched her chin with one hand and brought her eyes back u
p to meet his. He smiled softly.

  He saw resolution return to her face as her voice tentatively met his on the chorus.

  “Now, you’re getting the hang of it,” he said, laughing gently as they swayed as softly and slowly as the breeze.

  He stopped singing, stopped dancing. He pulled her a little closer to him and raised her hand, still held in his palm, to his shoulder. Then both of his larger hands circled her waist. “This is that awkward moment when you can’t figure out whether or not to let the girl go.”

  “You probably should,” she said quietly, her arms trembling.

  “What if I don’t want to?”

  “You’re going to go away some time soon, Brody,” she groaned. “I don’t want to fall for you.” Any harder than I already have.

  “You do have a point.” He nodded and then raised an eyebrow. “But the best laid plans of mice and men…”

  “Often go awry,” she finished for him breathlessly as she stood on tiptoe and placed her lips against his.

  He immediately enveloped her in his arms, as though her invitation was all he needed. His arms moved around her waist, crossing at her back. He pulled her as tightly to him as he could, as though he could pull her right into himself.

  “I can’t seem to get you off my mind.” His lips left hers to trail across her throat.

  “Same here,” she said breathlessly. His lips traced a silky pattern across her collarbone. Brody bent and slipped one arm beneath her knees and lifted her from her feet.

  “Brody!” she cried. He smothered her protest with another searing kiss, his lips parting hers with his tongue. Brody sat down with her in a rocking chair and placed her in his lap. Her legs hung over the arm of the chair and her bottom fit snugly in his lap.

  She tried to sit up. “I’m too heavy to sit in your lap.”

  He grabbed the outside of her thigh and ceased her frantic retreat. His hand roamed up her thigh toward her bottom. “You’re perfect for sitting on my lap.” His hand moved over her hip, up her arm, and found a place under her hair to hold her neck. He smiled at her gently and said against her closed lips, “Want to relax some? I promise I won’t bite.”

  In response, she nipped lightly against his bottom lip.

  “I can’t believe you did that.” he mumbled.

  “Sorry,” she responded. “Let me make it better.” She pressed her lips to his and touched his bottom lip with her tongue. She traced the line of the lower lip with the tip of her tongue and then closed her lips against his, their tongues warring desperately.

  Brody grabbed her hip and pulled her closer to him. His hardness pressing against her bottom and she shifted her body in his lap. He groaned. “Careful,” he whispered.

  “Sorry. Did I hurt you?” she asked tentatively, one hand reaching to caress his cheek.

  “Not in the way you think,” he said. “I haven’t enjoyed making out like this since I was eighteen.” He pulled her shirt out of her jeans and ran his hand across the skin of her waist.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever made out like this.”

  “I know, it feels as good as the first time, huh?”

  “Something like that,” she mumbled.

  His fingertips traced a pattern across her belly, causing the breath to catch in her throat and a flutter low in her stomach. She jumped as his fingers brushed the skin just an inch below her bra.

  “This okay?” he asked quietly.

  “I think so,” she breathed back, her lips still playing with his.

  His fingers moved up the side of her breast, touching the lacy material reverently. Her nipple stood at attention, straining against the thin cotton of her bra almost painfully, but he still didn’t’ touch it. Instead, he traced slow circles around her breast, working closer and closer to her nipple. She squirmed in his lap, hoping for something but not quite sure just what she wanted.

  He lifted her shirt so he could see her bra and reached between her breasts to unhook the front closure. Uncovering her breast, he groaned at the sight of it. He began his lazy circles again. Lou released his lips and threw her head back, her breath coming in gasps. Brody watched her with veiled eyes as he came closer and closer to the small brown nub that stood so proudly. He bent his head and took her nipple into his mouth. She gasped and reached for his hair, holding his head with a strong grip. No longer able to keep her eyes open, she bit her bottom lip and concentrated on the sensations his touch was creating.

  He gently flicked her nipple with his tongue, and it grew even harder in his mouth. He opened his lips, raising them a half inch from her skin, and took in a great gasp of air. This caused cool air to rush around her nipple and make it strain even harder toward his touch. He removed his mouth from her breast and replaced it with his hand, gently rolling her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. He repeated his lazy circles on the other breast.

  When his mouth finally closed over her, she moaned and grasped his hair tightly. She pulled him against her breast. At her urging, his cool seduction became more powerful. He bit gently against her nipple. She moved wildly in his lap.

  He grabbed the back of her neck and lifted her head where it hung back in abandon. He devoured her mouth as though she was his last meal.

  Just then, the porch lights came on above them, flooding them in brilliant, white light. The power was back on. Lou jumped as though she had been scalded and looked down. Her naked, white skin was in stark contrast against his dark hand that still cupped her full breast. Reality hit her. She frantically grabbed her shirttail and covered herself. She sat up stiffly in Brody’s lap, turning to move.

  He gripped her tightly around the waist and said close to her ear, “Hold on. Be still a minute. It’s still just you and me, all alone.”

  Her guilty conscience spoke. “I shouldn’t have behaved like that.”

  “Like what? Like you enjoyed it? That’s crazy. I love the way you ‘behaved’,” he added with a hint of sarcasm, still holding her close to him, still talking softly.

  “I don’t know how you get to me, but you do.” She kissed him gently on the lips and climbed out of his lap. She sat down awkwardly in the chair beside him and took his hand in hers. She held it gently as their breaths returned to normal. “I have never felt like this before.”

  “Surely, Sarah’s father…”

  She cut him off. “That was a completely different situation. You have so much more experience than I do.” She leaned forward with her elbows on her knees and held her face in her hands. She waited the length of a few breaths. Then her eyes rose to meet his, tears threatening to spill over her lashes. “I am not a whore.”

  He got up from his chair and knelt before her. He grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. “You think I don’t know that?”

  A tear rolled across her cheek and he caught it with his thumb. He kissed her forehead and rose, pulling her to a standing position before him. He encircled her with his strong arms and squeezed her gently. He held the pose until once again she relaxed and sighed.

  “Better?” he asked. She nodded against his shoulder. “Go to bed, Lou.” She turned and entered her room, closing the door firmly behind her and leaving him standing under the porch light all alone.

  I have a daughter, for Christ’s sake. Lou changed clothes and slipped beneath the covers. The cool sheets touched her skin, which still had goose bumps from her encounter with Brody. Every nerve ending stood on end as she remembered the way his hands had moved across her body.

  He must think I am an immeasurable tease, she thought as she lay on her back with one arm across her forehead, staring at the ceiling. A prick tease was what boys in high school had called her. Tonight, she had been the aggressor.

  He might have asked me to dance, but then I’m the one who kissed him. And then I bit him on the lip. Oh God! She would never be able to look him in the eye again.

  Lou tossed and turned most of the night but never slept deeply enough for nightmares, thank goodness. She woke the next day feeling
just as unsure of herself as she had the night before. She rose, dressed, and put on tennis shoes for her morning run. She brushed the snarls from her long, dark hair and put it in a ponytail. Today was Saturday so she wasn’t expected to make breakfast for the hands but still rose early. She poured a bowl of cereal for Sarah and kissed Sadie on the cheek as she went out the back door for her run.

  She looked around for Brody as she stretched against the fence but didn’t see any sign he was even up yet. It was probably better. He might not ever want to see her again.

  She checked her watch and started jogging slowly through the winding path she always used. She found a good rhythm and then picked up the pace. The sun felt good on her body and the exertion was always good for stress. She forgot time and place, and concentrated on her footfalls and her breathing. About ten minutes into her run, she rounded a corner and came up short as she spotted a man standing in her path. She slowed to a walk and shielded her eyes with her hand, trying to see if it was Brody who had somehow gotten ahead of her.

 

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