The question is barely out of his mouth before she nods and mumbles a watery yes. All the women are crying and even Roman is blinking away a tear as Maverick pulls the ring from the box and slips it onto her finger. God, I want that.
My gaze finds McKenna, though I instantly wish it hadn’t. I catch sight of her just in time for Parker to dip her back and press his lips to hers. My stomach churns with jealousy. When they break the kiss, however, it gets worse. Because there, right in front of my eyes, I can see it. The happiness etched across her face is pure, untainted, and without any bit of hesitation. Parker was right, he’s the better man for her.
The revelation is too much. It feels like the room is closing in on me and the air is too thick to breathe. Before I can look away, McKenna’s eyes meet mine. The smile is wiped from her face by what I can only assume is the pain she sees all over my own. Let’s face it, that girl can read me like an open book. Even if I attempted to mask it, she’d know. I have to get out of here.
I congratulate Maverick and Tatum, giving them each a hug and teasing Tatum about how I’m stuck with her for life now. In a silent exchange, Mav can see that I need to leave and takes no offense by my exit.
“See you at home?”
I nod. “Take your time. I’ll be alright.”
Pushing through the crowd of people, I finally get out the front door. The fresh air only provides a small amount of relief from the ache in my chest. The further I get from here, from her, the better. I’m halfway to my car when a familiar voice calls my name.
“Colton, wait.”
I don’t stop walking. “Go back inside, McKenna.”
“Colton!”
“I said go back inside!” I spin around to face her. “Go back in there with your future husband and live the life I could never give you.”
Her eyebrows furrow. “What are you talking about?”
“Nothing.” I turn and continue to my car. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”
None of it does.
26
MCKENNA
The room is decorated beautifully with balloons and lace that match the theme of my engagement party. A large banner hangs over the breathtaking view of the water. “Congratulations Future Mrs. Hall.” The name on the sign matches the one of my sash. When Tatum does something, she really goes all out.
I’m talking to my grandmother about how I’m all grown up when two unexpected guests come through the door. Avery and Mrs. Brooks. It’s not that their presence is unwanted, I just didn’t think they’d be here. I excuse myself from my grandmother and go over to say hello.
“McKenna!” Avery greets me. It’s crazy to see how big she’s gotten. The last time I saw her, she was twelve.
“Hey, Av. Wow, look at you!”
“Me?!” She gives me a once over. “You look amazing! My brother is an idiot for not snatching you up when he had the chance.”
I tense at the mention of Colton but mask it quickly. “And Mrs. Brooks, it’s great to see you again.”
“You too, dear. Congratulations on getting married.” She gives me a warm smile. “I hope he knows what a lucky man he is.”
“Thank you. I hope so, too.”
After a few minutes, Ivy comes over and pulls me away. As much as I love Colton’s family, I’m glad for the distraction. There are too many people here for me to be zoning out thinking of what it would be like if things were different – if the sash read Future Mrs. Brooks.
THE DAY IS FILLED with games and tons of people asking me things like if we’re going to start a family right away and if we plan on moving to England. Apparently, marrying a British man means immediately leaving the country and getting knocked up. When Ivy saw me roll my eyes at the question for the fifth time, she implemented a new game – no saying England, baby, bride, groom, or wedding.
By the time the party is over, I’m exhausted. I’ve opened more presents and thanked more people than should be allowed in a four-hour period. I step out onto the back porch to get some fresh air and look at the water. Nothing makes sense to me. I should be in a better mood today. In one week, I’ll be getting married. This is supposed to be a happy time, so why am I just…not?
“Mind if I join you?” Mrs. Brooks asks hesitantly.
I glance back at her and smile. “Not at all.” She comes to stand next to me and the two of us admire the view. “Did you have a nice time?”
“Oh, it was lovely. Tatum is very good at her job.”
“She is.” I agree.
The sound of the water and seagulls fills the silence before she finally speaks again. “I have something to give you but I don’t want it to make you feel uncomfortable in any way. I just wouldn’t feel right keeping it from you.”
“Okay?”
She opens her purse and takes out a tattered envelope. “The morning you left for New York, Colton had rushed out of the house only to come back less than a half hour later. He had this in his hand. Maybe it was wrong of me to keep it, but I know that if you weren’t already gone when he got there, this would’ve gotten to you.”
Written on the front is my name in Colton’s handwriting. The revelation of everything is making my heart hurt. “He came after me?”
She nods. “When he came home, he wouldn’t speak to me, or to anyone for that matter. He crumbled up the letter and threw it in the trash.”
“Well, thank you, for saving it and for giving it to me.”
“Of course, dear.”
She places a hand on my arm and squeezes lightly before heading back inside. Immediately, I open the envelope and pull out the letter.
McKenna,
By the time you’re reading this, you’re probably already on your way to NYU and I’m most likely off moping somewhere, missing you. This past summer has been the best time of my life, and that’s all because it had you in it. I know after our talk yesterday you probably think that you meant nothing more to me than a good time. Hell, you had those suspicions the whole time – but I want you to know that you’re wrong. There has never been anyone but you, not for a long time. What we have between us is something I can’t even begin to explain, and I don’t want to lose it. You were right when you said that we could make this work. I don’t see a reason why we can’t. So your brother will be mad, and may even kill me in my sleep, but who cares? The truth is, you’re worth the risk. What I’m trying to say is that if you still want me, and you want to try an actual, legitimate, public knowledge relationship, then I want that too because I love you, McKenna. There’s never been a day where I haven’t.
See you soon (I hope),
Colton
My vision is blurry from the tears welling up in my eyes. There are a million things going through my mind right now, but the main thought is crystal clear. I need to see him. Running inside, there’s no one around but Avery. Since the altercation we had at the club, I know he won’t answer if I text him, but his sister on the other hand…
“Av, I need to borrow your phone.”
She narrows her eyes at me. “Uh, why? Yours is right in your hand.”
“Please.” I beg. “I’ll do anything. I just need two minutes.”
Reluctantly, she hands over her phone and I immediately open a text with Colton.
Avery: Where are you?
It only takes a few seconds before he’s typing.
Colton: The docks. Why? Everything okay?
That’s all I need to know. I toss the device back at Avery and thank her as I book it outside. In the distance, I can see the tops of the masts. I take off my heels and start sprinting towards the boats. By the time I get there, I have no idea what I’m going to say – only that I need to say something.
I turn onto the ramp and run down towards the slip. Jumping onto the boat, I can hear Colton’s voice from the cabin.
“What the hell?” He comes up the steps and his eyes meet mine. “Mac? What are you doing here?”
“Why didn’t you tell me?!” I hold up the letter that’s clenched
tightly in my hand. “All this time, and you never told me.”
His eyes widen when he realizes what it is. “Where did you get that?”
“It doesn’t matter! What matters is I didn’t get it from you!” I throw it onto the ground in front of him and let my shoulders sag in defeat. “You came after me.”
“I did.”
“What kind of coward goes after someone and then doesn’t have the balls to tell them?!”
“Coward?!” He seethes. “Maybe if you had waited and not gotten engaged to the first man that came along, I would’ve had the chance to tell you!”
“I waited for you to get your head out of your ass for two years! Two fucking years, Colton! You never said a damn word!”
He throws his hands in the air and takes a step toward me. “How could I when you had blocked me in every possible way?! You made it pretty fucking clear that you moved on and I was not welcome in your world anymore!”
“You left! I put my heart on the line for you. I told you what I wanted, I put myself out there, and you walked out the door.”
He scoffs and looks down at the ground. “A mistake I’ll regret for the rest of my life, believe me.”
My anger is doused by his honesty. “You loved me.”
“I did.”
“Did?” I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed.
“Do.” He corrects. “But it doesn’t matter anymore.”
“Why do you keep saying that?! It matters and you know it.”
He runs his fingers through his hair frustratedly. “Why, McKenna? Why does it matter?”
“B-because. Because I… I…” My brain is working but my mouth just won’t cooperate. “It just does!”
“It doesn’t. If it did, you’d be able to say what’s going through your mind right now.”
Shaking his head, he goes to walk away. My body shifts into ultimate panic mode as I see that I’m losing him, again.
“Colton?!” I shout in desperation. When he stops and turns around, our eyes meet. Suddenly, the most truthful words I’ve ever said flow from my mouth with ease. “I love you.”
He closes the distance between us in just a few steps, slipping his hand around the back of my neck and pulling my mouth to his. I don’t hesitate to kiss him back. Our tongues collide and tangle together. As he grips my waist, my entire body responds to his touch. It’s like feeling it for the first time all over again.
“Inside, now.” He murmurs against my lips. “Before every bit of my restraint snaps and I fuck you right here.”
I don’t need to be told twice. Grabbing his hand, I lead the way down into the cabin. Just as he closes and locks the door, I use the belt loop of his jeans to pull him toward me. He gazes at me with such want and need that it almost knocks the wind out of me. There’s no denying what’s about to happen.
Taking the hem of his shirt in my hands, I peel the fabric from his muscled body. Once it’s free for me to admire, I run my hands down his chest, onto his abs, then to his waistband. I look up at him through my lashes and pull my bottom lip between my teeth – that’s all it takes. He growls and takes a step forward, pressing himself up against me.
“I need you to say it, McKenna.”
It takes a couple seconds to figure out what he means. Then, it hits me. He wants consent, and fuck that’s sexy.
“Make love to me, Colton.”
He whimpers as the final piece of him stops resisting and crashes into me, pushing us back through the cabin and into the bedroom. I’m lifted up and placed on the bed before he pulls my dress off. His one hand cups my face while the other unclips my bra. As soon as it slips down my arms, he moves his attention to my breasts. Taking one nipple into his mouth, he teases the other between his thumb and index finger. I throw my head back and release a pleasured moan.
I lay back as he starts kissing down my stomach, all the way to right above my panties. He pulls them to the side, teasingly blowing over my sex. I squirm at the sensation, but just when I’m about to chastise him, he lunges forward and sucks on my clit. Two fingers slip inside of me and he crooks them to rub the bundle of nerves inside. It feels so good that I swear I see stars. My hands grip the bed sheets as the pressure starts to build in my core. Judging by the way he speeds up, I know he can feel it too. If I make it through this orgasm alive, it’ll be a miracle.
I arch my hips, grinding myself against his mouth. It’s so intense, how he devours me like I’m his favorite meal. My body craves his touch in a way that no other man can satisfy, and now that I have it again, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to stop.
Our eyes lock and he lets out a moan, sending me over the edge and into euphoric oblivion. My whole body shakes as he rides me through my high. Before I’ve even come down, I can hear him removing his belt. He slips his arms under me and lifts me up, pinning me to the door. When I feel myself stretch around him, I’m sure I’m going to combust.
He lowers me down onto his thick length, only to lift me back up again. Finding his rhythm takes a minute, but once he does, there’s no holding back. He attaches his lips to my neck as he pounds into me, rattling the door with every thrust.
“Tell me again.”
I know it’s not consent he’s looking for, because we’re well past that. I quiver as I figure it out. “I love you, Colton.” My voice is breathy. “I love you.”
“Fuck, I love you, too.”
To read it in a letter was one thing, but to hear it come from his mouth is something entirely different. Tears spring to my eyes as I listen to him repeat the words that I’ve been dying to hear for so long.
“I love you so damn much, McKenna.”
His motions start to get sloppy and before I know it, he’s emptying himself inside of me while I explode around him. My body sags against his. How he manages to keep us upright is beyond me. I’m in a state of sexed out bliss as he carries me over to the bed and gently lays me down. I roll over to snuggle into his side, sighing in relief when he wraps his arm around me.
“My Colton.” I mumble tiredly.
He chuckles. “All yours, Princess. That’s never changed.”
COLTON
The two of us are lying in bed, still naked from when we ripped each other’s clothes off earlier, when McKenna’s phone starts to vibrate next to us. Parker’s name flashes across the screen. Without any hesitation, she hits ignore. I should be happy with her obvious choice to be with me instead, but as she turns her head to look at me, I see it – the stress and fear written all over her face.
“She will never feel secure in a relationship with you.” The irritating British voice repeats inside my head. “If you love her the way I think you do, you’ll leave her alone and let her be happy.”
As much as it kills me to admit it, maybe the trust fund brat is right. The way she looked at him the night of Maverick’s engagement – she was happy, there’s no denying that. There wasn’t any hesitation or confusion. She was free to just be. If she hadn’t gotten ahold of that letter, which I can only assume was the handiwork of my mother, would she still have come back to me after all? I could spend hours convincing myself that she would, but the truth is I’m not sure – and reading a letter from four years ago isn’t enough of a reason to throw everything good for her to hell.
“So, where do we go from here?” She asks, lightly rubbing her knuckle in between the ridges of my abs.
I take a deep breath, knowing the answer is going to hurt both of us like hell. “Now, you go and marry Parker.”
“W-what?! But… But we just… You said…”
“I know what I said, and I meant it with everything I am, but that doesn’t change anything.”
She scoffs. “The hell it doesn’t! Why are you doing this? If you love me, why are you sending me away?”
I sit up to face her but I can’t let my eyes meet hers. If I see the pain in them, I’ll cave. “He’s the better man for you, Mac. There’s no denying that.”
“Isn’t that for me to d
ecide?!”
“Maybe, if I thought you’d make the right choice, but I know if given the option, you’d pick me. You can’t pick me.”
A choked sob is muffled by her hand as she covers her mouth. “Oh, I get it. You just wanted one last fuck. One last time to remember me by, right?! You never actually wanted me. You never wanted this.”
“That’s not true and you know it.”
“Do I?! Because I’m starting to believe I don’t know anything about you anymore.” She picks her dress up off the floor and throws it on. “I can’t believe I let you do this to me, again.” After grabbing her phone, she rushes out the door.
“McKenna!” I try but it’s no use.
She’s long gone before I even make it onto the dock.
LATER THAT NIGHT, I’M lying in my bed, replaying the events of today in my head. God, when she showed up looking like a perfect mix between completely enamored and royally pissed, I was knocked off my axis. I had no idea my mother even kept that letter, let alone planned to give it to her. I would lecture her about the importance of not meddling in other people’s lives, but I know it would just be a waste of breath. Her intentions were good, her timing was just a little off.
When I got home, Tatum didn’t even let me make it to the stairs before she pushed me up against the wall and kneed me in the balls. Then, after I caught my breath enough to explain, she did it again. According to her, there’s a fine line between being chivalrous and being an idiot. Still, there’s nothing she could say that would change my mind. McKenna is better off with Parker, and while I wish things were different, they’re not – which is what brings me to my current dilemma.
I stare at my phone, my finger hovering over Landon Stanford’s name. For the past three hours, I’ve been debating on whether or not to call. The job offer in Los Angeles is a great opportunity for me. I could have Roman running the show here – he’s more than qualified – and I’d be leading a new project out in California. However, what’s really making me consider taking it, is McKenna. By getting out of this small town, I’d finally be able to give her what she needs – freedom.
Returning to Rockport: A Brother's Best Friend Romance Page 29