Begin Again: Allie and Kaden's Story

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Begin Again: Allie and Kaden's Story Page 5

by Mona Kasten


  “That’s why I’m sorry. I just had such a long week and lost control, and then there was the wine, and … ” I paused and blinked. “Huh?”

  “I didn’t like the way she spoke to Monica, either,” he said. For a moment he seemed lost in thought, then folded his arms behind his head. “To tell the truth, I didn’t like anything that came out of her mouth. It was more what she did with her mouth.”

  I gulped my coffee.

  “Yuck, Kaden!”

  He grinned. A sly, self-assured grin. I wished I could just pour my coffee over his head. “What? Since we’re roommates now we can talk about this stuff openly and honestly, right? That’s what I always did with Ethan.”

  I grimaced. “No thanks. No need. Would you excuse me now? I’ve got to go brush my teeth,” I said, putting down my coffee and getting up to leave. But I didn’t get far.

  Kaden had grabbed me by the wrist and turned me around. In a sweeping move he’d trapped me between his legs. I stumbled and had to support myself with the other hand on his shoulder to avoid falling into his lap. I felt his hard muscles under his thin cotton shirt. Mmm.

  “Monica is the only woman I’d call a friend.”

  His grip around my wrist was gentle. I could have freed myself at any moment. But I didn’t want to, not at all.

  “So you didn’t violate any rules,” he whispered, letting go.

  Confused, I stayed put and frowned down at Kaden. “So I did everything right?”

  Kaden raised one eyebrow. “That’s not how I’d put it, actually.”

  “Actually,” I mimicked, grinning broadly at him.

  “Don’t get too cocky, Allison.”

  The grin froze on my face.

  “How do you know my name’s Allison?” I demanded.

  It was as if that other moment between us had never been. Kaden had rolled a bit backward on my desk chair and was giving me this nasty, mean look I’d come to know so well. “A good guess? There aren’t that many possibilities with a name like Allie.”

  “Ah.” I turned away from him. “I really have to go wash up,” I said, and dashed out.

  Sighing, I leaned over the sink and supported myself with both hands on the cool surface. Everything’s fine. It didn’t take magic for him to conjure Allie into Allison. And that wasn’t even my first name, just my middle name. Everything was okay. No need to worry.

  Just as I shoved the toothbrush into my mouth, I heard a knock. And of course Kaden opened the door without waiting for me to say, “Come in.”

  I should have screamed. Why isn’t there a lock? What if I’d been on the toilet? But instead I tried to appear as undisturbed as possible, and said only: “Hmm?”

  “Do you have hiking shoes?” he asked.

  I shook my head and brushed my teeth a bit more vehemently than necessary.

  “That’s not going to do you any good,” muttered Kaden.

  I spit out the toothpaste and rinsed my mouth well before asking, “You want to go on a hike with me?”

  My words were muffled, as I dried my face with a hand towel.

  “You said something about how you came here because of the scenery. I thought I could show you a few spots.”

  Looking at Kaden, I raised one eyebrow. “Why?”

  The fact that he could change so much overnight was utterly confusing to me.

  Kaden just shrugged. “You don’t have to come. If you want, you can also sit around here and cry.”

  Oh. My. God. Had he heard my little nervous breakdown last night?

  He raised his eyebrows. “The walls are thin.”

  “I was just—” I started, but Kaden interrupted.

  “I don’t give a shit why you were bawling. Rule one,” he admonished me, as I pressed my lips together. Of course. “But if you’re in the mood to see a bit of Woodshill and you’re seriously into nature, come with me. I’m going out today.”

  I swung around to face him as he followed me back to my bedroom. “You got me. But please leave me alone while I get dressed.”

  His eyes twinkled. “I could help you.”

  “Rule number three, Kaden,” I admonished, and even surprised myself at how well I managed to imitate his tone. Hopefully it would sink in with him, how ridiculous that whole thing was.

  “No, I mean I could help you pick out what to wear,” he replied, without picking up on my joke. His brows knit, he walked over to my shelf and inspected my shoes. “You really don’t have any hiking shoes, do you?”

  “Nope. I’ve only been in Woodshill a few days.”

  He lifted up a pair of my heels. “But you have a hell of a lot of these.”

  “You can’t have enough pumps.”

  “I’m sure they look incredibly sexy, but I doubt you could walk for long in them.” He put the shoes back in their place and grabbed a pair of sneakers. They were old things that I only wore when I went to a Pilates class. “These will have to do.”

  He set them on the floor in front of me and left the room. “Get a move on. I wanted to leave half an hour ago.”

  He didn’t see me roll my eyes. On one hand it was nice of him to want to take me along, but on the other hand his domineering style was driving me crazy.

  Still, I was secretly pleased to see something of the mountains that I’d only viewed from a distance or on the Internet. I put on a pair of jeans and a blouse. Then I tied the laces of my sneakers in tight loops and grabbed my purse.

  When I entered the living room, Kaden was leaning against the kitchen counter. Seeing me, he frowned so darkly that I could hardly see his eyes. “Are you kidding me?” he asked, in disbelief.

  “What?” I looked down at myself—not bad, if you asked me.

  “Your top won’t work at all. It’s going to fall apart the minute you come near a branch. Come here,” he said and went into his room.

  Taken aback, I followed him to the doorway.

  He was standing in front of his dresser, rummaging around one of the upper drawers. As he reached, his sweatshirt slipped up so high that I could see a bit of his skin. A very nice sight. Especially when I let my eyes wander down below the waistband of his boxer shorts. My roomie had a very nice …

  “Here,” he said and threw a gray bundle at me. Oh, God: Had he noticed me staring at his butt? “Put this on.”

  I put my bag on Kaden’s desk and unfolded a thick hoodie with pockets you could easily sink your hands into. On the front was the masked face of Deadpool, which made me smile. Apparently, I wasn’t the only superhero fan in this apartment. “Thanks.”

  I pulled my blouse over my head. Of course I was wearing a camisole under it, but Kaden’s eyes widened a bit, and I turned around. As I slipped into his sweater I took the chance to inhale at the collar. It smelled like Kaden. I grabbed my bag from his desk and turned to face him.

  “Why on earth would you want to take a purse on a hike?” he asked, jerking his head toward my bag.

  “Because I’m sure I’ll need money. And of course my phone. And lip gloss, tissues, and … ”

  Kaden grimaced. “Maybe I should leave you here.”

  Had this guy had never been around a female of our species? Unnerved, I fished my cell phone out of the bag, but paused as I heard him say my name.

  “Allie.”

  It was the first time he’d called me by the name I’d given him when we met.

  I raised my eyes from my bag and looked at him.

  “Hiking is about leaving everything behind and freeing your mind. You won’t need a cell phone or your wallet, let alone all that other shit.”

  I gave a loud sigh and set my bag back on his desk, lifting my empty hands in the air. “Happy?”

  Kaden gave me a crooked smile. “Very.”

  OMG.

  What was I getting myself into?

  Chapter 5
>
  I stopped in my tracks in the middle of the parking lot.

  “Are you coming, or what?” Kaden called out, annoyed, as he unlocked his Jeep.

  That’s right. His Jeep. This guy owned a huge, brand spanking new, steel gray Jeep Wrangler.

  As Kaden started it up, the motor roared so loudly that I flinched.

  I ran around to the passenger seat and was barely inside when Kaden drove off and turned onto the main street.

  “There are CDs in the glove compartment,” he said.

  I didn’t need any encouragement in that department, and I was amazed at what I found there. There were some groups I didn’t recognize, but I also found a few of my absolute favorites.

  It almost felt like a test: Could I find the right soundtrack for our road trip? I continued rummaging through his collection until I found a few burned CDs at the bottom of the pile.

  “What’s this K-Mix?” I asked grinning, and held up a disc whose cover was decorated with hearts.

  I regretted it immediately. For a split second there was a bitter look on Kaden’s face. But just as fast, his emotion disappeared and I was looking at a hard, impenetrable mask.

  “Take it out and give it to me,” he said, strangely calm.

  I swallowed hard and did as he asked, though I didn’t feel so good about it. In the blink of an eye he’d cracked and broken the CD with one hand. Then he threw the fragments on the backseat.

  I guessed a former girlfriend had given him this heart-covered CD.

  “Now that you’ve let your anger out, we can listen to this one,” I offered after a concerned pause. I held out my favorite album by Thirty Seconds to Mars.

  He took it from me without looking and shoved it into the narrow slit in the CD player. I hit play on one of my favorite songs.

  As the tune came on, I felt Kaden’s eyes on me again. “I took you for a Taylor Swift fan right away, but you don’t look like someone who still listens to Thirty Seconds to Mars.”

  For a moment I returned his intense stare before I turned my head and looked out the window again. The landscape was too beautiful to miss. The weather was perfect: Sunlight streamed between the peaks of the nearby mountains and bathed everything in bright light. “Someone like you should know that prejudices are to be enjoyed at your own risk.”

  He emitted a sound not unlike a grunt. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I am pretty sure that people sometimes don’t see you as you are. People tend to draw hasty conclusions.”

  “Including you, right?” asked Kaden. Now I had to look at him again.

  One arm lay casually on the edge of the open window; his eyes were fixed on the road ahead. With his baseball cap on, he looked like a different person.

  “What do you mean?” I asked, interested. I’d always judged people by their appearance before. This kind of superficial behavior was the norm in my parents’ circles. But since I’d arrived in Woodshill, I’d been trying to kick this habit.

  “You took one look at my tattoos and right away wrote me off as a bad boy,” he reminded me, and turned his baseball cap around so the visor was in back.

  “Whatever,” I answered. “I didn’t do that because of your tattoos, but because you have such a strong presence,” I explained.

  The corner of Kaden’s mouth twitched. “I have what kind of presence?”

  “Come on, Kaden.” I raised one eyebrow snidely and turned to look out the window again. Jared Leto was singing about the truth running free, and as usual his voice gave me goose bumps. The music got under my skin.

  “No, really. What do you mean?”

  I sighed. “I’m not going to smear anyone with honey if they don’t need it.”

  Now he laughed. It was a deep laugh, and mingled with the music.

  We spent the rest of the trip in amicable silence. It was nice to see more of Woodshill. At some point the road became less even, and thick trees lined our way. Kaden stopped in a parking place whose sign revealed that several hiking trails ended here.

  Kaden had put on his sunglasses. He held a plastic bottle in his right hand. Great. Apparently he was allowed to bring things along.

  I hopped out of the car and buried my hands into the pockets of the sweater.

  I looked around and ran to check out the signs on the wooden hut, to get some orientation. I probably wouldn’t need this, since I was with an experienced guide, but it couldn’t hurt to look.

  “Should we take this route?” I asked and pointed to a blue line that was one of the easier trails. I turned toward Kaden, but was already on his way.

  “Hey!” I shouted after him.

  He’d started out on a trail and was a few yards ahead. I looked back at the map and then back to him. “Where are you going? We have to decide which trail to take!”

  Kaden ignored my question. “Less talking, more walking,” was his response.

  Of course it was asking too much to choose a beginners’ trail where I could introduce myself to mountain hiking and get in shape. No, Kaden had to go full steam ahead on a path with an estimated 100 percent gradient. I was already having problems keeping up with him—though there weren’t even fifty yards between us. By the time I made it, I had already slipped a few times. I really would need good hiking boots if I wanted to do this more often.

  “Which route are we taking now?” I held my hand up to block the blinding sun from my eyes.

  “Now? We’re staying on the black trail,” he answered. He wasn’t out of breath at all. Of course not.

  The sun and the steep slope made me sweat, and with each step I regretted more and more that I’d always rejected cardio training.

  “The black route wasn’t the easy one, was it?” I asked as I tried to keep up. Goodness, the guy must have motors in his hiking boots.

  “The blue route is for seniors.” There was something disturbing in his tone. “Now stop blabbing and get a move on, Bubbles.”

  Bubbles? I ignored the stupidest nickname of all time, and stopped. “This is the hardest route, isn’t it?”

  Kaden turned around to face me, but kept on walking—backward. I kind of hoped he’d trip over a stone and roll back down the mountain. That was the only thing that came to mind when I saw his mean grin. “Less talking, more walking,” he said again, turning back to face uphill.

  My prayers were not heard.

  I had no idea how long we were hiking.

  At some point Kaden had left the marked trail. When I looked at him questioningly, he just said, “Trust me, it’ll be worth it.”

  Trust me. Not funny.

  I would never do anything with him again. Never. Again.

  He led me over the nastiest roots and thickest undergrowth. I fell twice, and he didn’t offer to help.

  “You’re almost there,” came Kaden’s voice from about two years above.

  He’d been saying this off and on for the last couple of hours. And I didn’t believe him this time, either. I was so upset that the only thing that kept me going was the idea of pushing him off a cliff once we reached the top.

  I shifted my weight and pulled myself up on a massive boulder. When I made it, I gasped for breath. For God’s sake: This was it. Covered in sweat, I sat on the rock and was about to lean back to stretch my painful muscles when Kaden grabbed me under the arms and lifted me to my feet again. I wobbled for a second before he turned me around and guided me a few steps farther.

  And then, breathing suddenly became unimportant.

  I grabbed Kaden’s arm, because I suddenly felt so incredibly small.

  Below us lay the world.

  No image on the Internet could have captured this view. We were so high up on the mountain that we could look down on the huge treetops.

  I took a deep breath and felt only one thing: clarity.

  Up here the only
sound was the light rustling of branches, the chirping of crickets and birds. It was so … peaceful.

  At this moment I could not only imagine the freedom that I’d been longing for—I felt like I had achieved it, like it was filling me. The energy of life tingled through my body; I didn’t even feel my muscles ache anymore. A slight breeze tickled the ends of my hair. I was breathless.

  “You’re not going to start sniffling again, are you?” Kaden asked with a hint of disgust.

  I couldn’t answer. I had no words. Even my fantasy of pushing Kaden off the mountain had melted away. Instead, I released his arm and wiped my eyes with the sleeve of the sweater. It took a few seconds before my voice returned. “The sun is just blinding me.”

  “It’s okay,” he said. He settled down on the rock behind me.

  Carefully, I did the same, leaning back on my stretched out arms.

  “The first time I came up here, I was just as blown away.”

  “Did you get sun in your eyes, too?” I joked.

  Kaden snorted. “In case you forgot, I’m a man.”

  “Oh, really?”

  “You mean you didn’t figure that out yet?” Kaden’s voice was so close to my ear that I could feel the warmth of his breath. Startled, I opened my eyes as he added, “Do you need proof?”

  His sonorous voice triggered my goose bumps again; it had nothing to do with feeling cold. I swallowed hard. He was so close now that I could see every wrinkle around his eyes and the turn of his lips as he smiled.

  “Is that what you always do up here? Give girls proof?” I asked and looked away. Damn Kaden, with his damn presence and his damn confusing comments.

  “I’ve only ever been here with Ethan and Spencer. This was just your entrance exam,” he explained, sinking back on his elbows. He tipped his head back and turned his face toward the sun.

  “And?” I asked, wrapping my arms around my knees.

  He raised his chin a little. “And what?”

  “Did I pass the test?”

  Kaden’s expression was impenetrable. “I don’t know yet.”

 

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