Dreams of a Wild Heart

by Danube Adele

  Tabron’s hand fell to my thigh under the table. He gave me a squeeze, which actually scrambled my thoughts for a second. His hand was large enough to cover most of my thigh, his fingers close to the apex of my thighs. Was he trying to give me a warning or get me aroused? I looked up at him, but his expression gave nothing away. He continued eating. What had I been about to say? My sex gave a single hot pulse. What would it feel like to have his hand slide up my thigh? Reach the wet heat there. How the heck was I going to keep him in check if I couldn’t keep myself in check? There was no way I could let myself—I was not going to let myself get physically embroiled in some kind of affair.

  “Are you enjoying your food, Cecilia?” he asked politely, taking his hand off my leg to lift his napkin to his lips.

  Oh, snap. Where was my mind going? No, no. Nothing was going to happen, and his attempts at redirection were clever, but I wasn’t a two-year-old. I looked back to the king. “The day I arrived, there was a riot. People were surging within the palace walls. What do they have to riot about?”

  The king stared at me for a moment, and it was like everyone held their breath collectively. Then he set his fork down and wiped his mouth, which seemed like a bad sign. He focused his full attention on me. “You have a lot of questions, doctor. Why do you need to know this?”

  “She has questions because she isn’t from here,” Tabron stated immediately, meeting the king’s gaze. “Ours is a different way of life. She has a lot to learn.”

  He’d taken up for me with Morten and the king. What did that mean? Silence fell for several seconds. It seemed like there was a battle of wills going on between the king and Tabron, who’d put his own utensil down.

  A slow smile broke over the older man’s face and he nodded. “That’s right. She’s new to us.”

  “It’s completely dull and boring here,” Tarra interjected in a petulant tone from her end of the table. “Cecilia is probably used to more excitement.”

  “It’s only boring for someone who is useless,” Bruner told her. “If you were to help someone, maybe you’d feel differently. Maybe you could be an assistant to the doctor.”

  “Oh, I could never do that.” Tarra wrinkled her nose. “I’d just get in the way.”

  “I’m sure you would,” Bruner muttered under his breath.

  People needed to quick hijacking my conversation here. I had an agenda. As calmly as possible, I explained, “I just want to understand the state of affairs here. What do I need to know to live here? What do I need to be aware of so I can be safe? What is making the people angry? I don’t want to get caught in the crossfire.” I looked at Draxton, but my next comment was for the king. “What protection do I have if I’m attacked unlawfully?”

  “If it’s proven you’re a victim, there will be justice.”

  Just as I’d thought. No protection. I could read between the lines. I’d have to watch my own back and never get caught alone without some sort of weapon.

  “I can tell you about the people. The villagers just like to fight.” Tarra gave an airy wave of her hand. “Honestly, they’re always angry. There’s no real reason.”

  “Maybe they’re angry because they’re hungry.”

  The king’s eyes narrowed on me again, the irritation turning into something spookier. There was an angry burn growing there. His voice was quiet in an “oh shit” kind of way. “You’ve talked with them, have you?”

  Danger, Will Robinson! I was suddenly walking on quicksand. I decided to change my strategy. “If I was able to see a few of them, maybe I would be able to calm their fears. If not in the palace, then maybe I would be able to use the room set up in town? I could maybe go into town a few times a week to assist others.”

  He stared at me in silence for a few more seconds.

  “And you think they would be calmed by this?” A thoughtful expression crossed his features. He hadn’t thought about it from that point of view.

  “It would allow the people to feel as though they are being taken care of.”

  “They are being taken care of.” He narrowed his eyes briefly, but also stated, “I’ll think on this.”

  It was a small win, and I should have backed off, but I couldn’t stop there. “If there’s one more thing...”

  “She invites trouble for herself.” Draxton laughed. “Allowances will lead to the palace being overrun.”

  “She has the courage of her convictions.” Tabron set his cup down with more force than necessary on the table. “There is no harm in her words.”

  “Of course not,” the king waved a hand for me to continue. “What else would you have me do?”

  “When I was in town, I was absolutely horrified by the amount of trash piled in the streets. I don’t know if you’ve been there any time recently.”

  “I haven’t.”

  “I’m a health professional, King Ral’e. Isn’t that why I’m here? You need to know that the danger of disease from these conditions is not only for the people, but for everyone here, as well, including yourself. When disease breaks out, it can pass a number of ways, depending on the illness. Sometimes, it can be passed through blood or simple touch, sometimes through the air. By keeping the streets clean, the water supply clean, the waste far away from human habitation, you can prevent further death. History has shown that when conditions become desperate, pandemics occur that wipe out entire towns. Perhaps a committee of villagers can be put in charge of organizing regular waste removal. The village center looks like it used to be quite beautiful. I think the people would participate in helping to make it so again.”

  See? I’d ended with something pleasant. Everyone was watching the king for reaction. Was he about to shout “off with her head” or would he recognize good sense? He picked up his fork again, ate another bite of food, kept me waiting as he thought about what I was asking.

  Finally, he nodded. “That seems reasonable. If you can arrange a group to see to this, I will do my best to provide whatever assistance is needed.”

  “Thank you.” I released my breath. “I’m sure your people will appreciate your care. It’s a small step, but one of the more important in securing the health of the people.” If I could help get the streets cleaned up and gave some basic knowledge about how to maintain good health, I would be able to leave with a clean conscience. Absolutely.

  You keep thinking you’ll have a chance to leave. You’re fooling yourself.

  I’m a smart girl, Viking. I could dissect your heart in under five minutes and tell you what’s wrong with it.

  I thought you said I had none.

  It’s there. Just buried under misguidance.

  “And tomorrow, before the lunch meal, you will see to my own health and well-being?” The king arched a brow at me, then stabbed a piece of meat and ate it.

  I inclined my head. “Of course. Did you want to come to the facilities you’ve set up?”

  “Come to my rooms.” He took another bite of his food, but his eyes held mine as he chewed and swallowed. “If you’re this concerned with the health and well-being of the people, then I will be in good hands.”

  “I’ll do the best I can.”

  The tension faded and with a feeling of accomplishment, I took a few more bites of my meal, which was starting to feel heavy in my gut. Was it possible to go for a run? After a few weeks, this food was going to start showing up on my body. But who knew? Maybe I’d already be back home in a few weeks, doing a gym workout, and appreciative of the new knowledge I’d gained about the universe at large.

  The question had quite definitively been answered. Yes, there was life on other planets.

  The rest of the meal went well. For the most part, everyone was friendly, but Draxton had a permanent smirk on his face. He winked at me, like we shared a secret or something. Morten, I was convinced, was truly part of the dark side o
f the force. He was a black hole of energy suck, and it was like everyone knew it. They steered clear of him. Lucky me, I got to be the object of his obsession for this evening. I could feel his eyes on me. For sure his mind was working, planning. I had a bad feeling that something was going to happen to me soon, and that I couldn’t turn my back.

  Mr. Creepy.

  The soothing hum of energy coming from Tabron seemed to be a reminder that he was looking out for me as well, which kept me from feeling too overwhelmed.

  Tarra told to me about the flowers that were blooming, and the names of the different horses that were housed in the stables. She talked about taking me for a tour of the grounds after seeing to her uncle the next day. I agreed to go, thinking it would be a good idea to know as much as I could about the property.

  “Are you finished with your meal? I can walk you to our rooms.”

  Tabron’s voice was low, vibrating near my ear and causing a delicious warmth to spread with syrupy thickness through my veins. Looking around, I saw that many of the warriors had already left the table. Even Tarra took the opportunity to give me a quick trill of her fingers with a promise to see me tomorrow before bouncing off. Only the servant girl stood at a distance, observing us with narrowed eyes.

  Our rooms. Together.

  “I guess so.” This was when my nerves attacked, my heart beat a little faster. We were now going to play house? He was going to sleep with me? My body responded with a warm sprinkling of desire, but my mind was calling for protest from the mountain top. He’d kidnapped me! I didn’t know this guy! Even so, I was glad I’d elected to get regular birth-control shots every three months, just to keep myself regulated. I was already hot for him, so it was crucial that I kept my distance. And he was a sneaky one. I still remembered the feel of his thumb doing a sneak attack over my nipple, making me feel crazy with a few simple strokes back at the restaurant when his eyes had lost their ice and gone smoky.

  “Tabron, I need to speak with you,” the king told him.

  “Allow me to walk Cecilia to our rooms, and I can return to you.”

  “I’m sure she’s fully capable of walking on her own. You can see her in a few minutes.” The command was absolute. The expectation was that Tabron was to obey immediately. Instead, his eyes narrowed with a flash of irritation. He didn’t like being commanded to leave me, which I understood after the Draxton incident just before dinner.

  And I’d left the damn syringe behind.

  “I would assure myself of her safety,” Tabron countered, almost sounding like he was going against the king’s orders. A moment of shock at his statement brought a heavy silence to those few remaining.

  “You think she is unsafe here?” There was a clear warning in the king’s voice. “How dear. You worry already over your mate.”

  Tabron’s jaw tightened, his lips thinned with irritation and for a moment I was sure he was going to argue, but remembering the man hanging from the tree had me shaking my head quickly. I didn’t want him risking punishment for me. “I’m fine. I can get there on my own.” A quick glance at the king, and I thought I saw a sly smile reflected there. Was he up to something?

  “I’ll be there shortly,” Tabron promised.

  “No worries. I’m good.” It would also give me a chance to take a quick walk into the village.

  I waited for Tabron to look away before dropping my bread and a leg of chicken in my cloth napkin. What could it hurt? Folding the cloth in my lap to protect the food, I stood, letting my hand hide in the folds of the dress material.

  “Sleep well, my dear.” The king waved me off.

  I gave a slight nod, thinking he would appreciate the show of respect, then walked from the room, leaving them alone. This actually couldn’t have worked out better. I could clear my mind, get right with myself over this whole attraction thing and help someone else at the same time. It wouldn’t hurt anything to make a quick run out to Raseen’s house. I could go and be back in ten minutes at most. If anyone asked, I could say I was taking a walk before settling in for the night.

  Giving it too much thought would have eaten up precious time, so I didn’t think. I just went. Casually. With Confidence. Like I owned the place. My heart was in my throat with the knowledge that this wasn’t allowed, but leaving couldn’t have been easier. In moments, I was out the door.

  The gate hadn’t been closed or locked. Without any work, I managed to find myself at Raseen’s front door, hoping it wouldn’t frighten her to find me knocking. The streets were empty and darkness was settling, though with two moons lighting the way, a heavenly swath of light illuminated the street. A few lights flickered in buildings here and there. I was glad to note that Raseen’s home was one of them.

  I tried to knock quietly.

  “Yes?”

  “Raseen, it’s Cecilia.”

  “What?” The door opened nearly immediately, and Raseen’s face peeked out with some surprise. “Are you all right?”

  “I’m fine. Fine. I was hoping to share some news with you. Can I come in?”

  “Of course.” She stepped back and with relief, I crossed the threshold.

  “Is Cyral asleep?”

  “I have him looking at his letters.”

  “You do? That’s wonderful. I’m so glad you’re taking such good care of him.”

  “It’s not much.” She flushed with pleasure at the compliment. “There are a few books that were my husband’s when he was in school so long ago. I remember how to make some of the words, though I didn’t get much learning when I was a girl. In Blysdan, the girls were pushed more to learn things like weaving and sewing.”

  “Well, I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m here. First off, I wanted to give you this.” I held out my napkin of food. “I couldn’t take more or it would be noticed.”

  Strangely, she backed away a step while looking at my hand. “What is it?”

  “Some food.”

  “Dr. Cecilia, you can’t do that!” Her voice was a horrified whisper. “I can’t take that.”

  “Why not? No one would know.”

  “I can’t risk it. My boy would become orphaned.”

  “Because I gave you some food?” My voice sounded incredulous, but she was clearly frightened and the memory of the man hanging from the tree was fresh.

  “I know you mean well, but you don’t understand.”

  “I didn’t mean to upset you. Seeing you all so thin when there’s a bounty of food in the palace is making me crazy. Your son will be orphaned if you don’t start getting some nutrition.”

  Her gaze lingered the napkin. The smell of it was reaching her. “Maybe just this once, but please don’t do this again. It puts all of us at risk.”

  “I’m so sorry, but his little friend is going to die if he doesn’t eat more regularly, and Sayla needs food to keep growing two babies.” The feeling of despair was close. “I can’t stand to see you all suffering.”

  “I just hope Cyral can keep from telling anyone else.”

  “I can.” We both looked up to see him coming down the stairs carrying his own candle. “Did you bring us some food?”

  “Just a little. I wish it were more.”

  “Now you can’t tell anyone, Cyral. Not anyone. Do you hear?” Raseen walked to him, planting a kiss on the top of his head. “We could all be in serious trouble.”

  “I won’t tell.”

  “I know you won’t.” I smiled at him. “There is a bit of news I wanted to share. I convinced the king to allow a group of you to organize cleanup. He’s promised to provide whatever help is necessary. Is this something you’d like to be part of? Would you talk to others and see about working together on this project?”

  She took a deep breath and looked down at Cyral. “I don’t know. Let me think on it. Drawing attention to myself by stepping
forward is giving me a wrong feeling. Like I said before, Cyral is most important. I can’t let him down.”

  “I understand.” Raseen looked down at the napkin with some relief when I handed it to her. I was preparing to head for the door when she gave me a quick hug.

  She whispered, “Thank you for showing us such kindness.”

  My throat knotted up, and I hugged her back. “I’m just trying to do some good while I can. I better go before people start looking for me.”

  “Hurry back. Be careful.”

  How much time had elapsed? It was hard to tell. Maybe the trip had taken longer than expected. Fifteen, twenty minutes? No alarm had been raised, which gave me a sense of relief. I saw no one as I walked back through the gate into the courtyard. The servants looked to have retired for the night because the hall was empty but for a few lights that were turned on low. It made me realize that the palace was wired for some form of electricity where the town was not. It seemed the king was enjoying all the perks without wanting to share the good fortune with his people. I was not even remotely surprised. He probably hadn’t shared any of his toys as a child either.

  I hurried up the stairs and rounded the corner of the hall where my rooms were located thinking I was nearly home free, when I practically ran into Morten. Dread put me in a sudden cold sweat. He’d been lying in wait for me. I’d almost made it.

  “Where’ve you been, love?”

  Trying to seem casual, I started to brush past him. “It’s really none of your business, but I went for a walk.”

  He snagged my arm, swung me around and brought me close. I let him, though it went against instinct. I needed to buy time. I needed to think. Being strictly reactive could get me in more trouble. He smiled, thinking I was being submissive. There was something so cold in his eyes. Emotionless. “You should be kinder to me. I know some things.”

  “Do you need two hands to count those things or just one?”

  His pale eyes searched my face. “I’ll remember these insults, little one, and when I finally have you to myself, you’ll beg me to take you.”