by B. M. Bower
CHAPTER 5. THE HAPPY FAMILY TURN NESTERS
"Say, Andy, where's them dry-farmers?" Big Medicine inquired at the topof his voice when the Happy Family had reached the biscuit-and-syrupstage of supper that evening.
"Oh, they're trying to make up their minds whether to bring the oldfannin'-mill along or sell it and buy new when they get here," Andyinformed him imperturbably. "The women-folks are busy going throughtheir rag bags, cutting the buttons off all the pants that ain't worthpatching no more, and getting father's socks all darned up."
The Happy Family snickered appreciatively; this was more like the AndyGreen with whom they were accustomed to deal.
"What's daughter doin', about now?" asked Cal Emmett, fixing his round,baby-blue stare upon Andy.
"Daughter? Why, daughter's leaning over the gate telling him shewouldn't never LOOK at one of them wild cowboys--the idea! She'sheard all about 'em, and they're too rough and rude for HER. And she'spromising to write every day, and giving him a lock of hair to keep inthe back of his dollar watch. Pass the cane Juice, somebody."
"Yeah--all right for daughter. If she's a good looker we'll see if shedon't change her verdict about cowboys."
"Who will? You don't call yourself one, do yuh?" Pink flung at himquickly.
"Well, that depends; I know I ain't any LADY broncho--hey, cut it out!"This last because of half a biscuit aimed accurately at the middle ofhis face. If you want to know why, search out the history of acertain War Bonnet Roundup, wherein Pink rashly impersonated a ladybroncho-fighter.
"Wher'e they going to live when they git here?" asked Happy Jack,reverting to the subject of dry farmers.
"Close enough so you can holler from here to their back door, my boy--ifthey have their say about it," Andy assured him cheerfully. Andy feltthat he could afford to be facetious now that he had Chip and Weary onhis side.
"Aw, gwan! I betche there ain't a word of truth in all that scareytalk," Happy Jack fleered heavily.
"Name your bet. I'll take it." Andy filled his mouth with hot biscuitand stirred up the sugar in his coffee like a man who is occupiedchiefly with the joys of the table.
"Aw, you ain't going to git me that way agin," Happy Jack declared."They's some ketch to it."
"There sure is, Happy. The biggest ketch you ever seen in your life.It's ketch the Flying U outfit and squeeze the life out of it;that's the ketch." Andy's tone had in it no banter, but considerableearnestness. For, though Chip would no doubt convince the boys that thedanger was very real, there was a small matter of personal pride to urgeAndy into trying to convince, them himself, without aid from Chip or anyone else.
"Well, by golly, I'd like to see anybody try that there scheme," blurtedSlim. "That's all--I'd just like to see 'em TRY it once!"
"Oh, you'll see it, all right--and you won't have to wait long, either.Just set around on your haunches a couple of weeks or so. That's allyou'll have to do, Slim; you'll see it tried, fast enough."
Pink eyed him with a wide, purple glance. "You'd like to make us fallfor that, wouldn't you?" he challenged warily.
Andy gave him a level look. "No, I wouldn't. I'd like to put one overon you smart gazabos that think you know it all; but I don't want tobad enough to see the Flying U go outa business just so I could hollerdidn't-I-tell-you. There's a limit to what I'll pay for a josh."
"Well," put in the Native Son with his easy drawl, "I'm coming to thecentre with my ante, just for the sake of seeing the cards turned. Deal'em out, amigo; state your case once more, so we can take a good, squarelook at these dry-farmers."
"Yeah--go ahead and tell us what's bustin' the buttons off your vest,"Cal Emmett invited.
"What's the use?" Andy argued. "You'd all just raise up on your hindlegs and holler your heads off. You wouldn't DO anything about it--notif you knew it was the truth!" This, of course, was pure guile upon hispart.
"Oh, wouldn't we? I guess, by golly, we'd do as much for the outfit aswhat you would--and a hull lot more if it come to a show-down." Slimswallowed the bait.
"Maybe you would, if you could take it out in talking," snorted Andy."My chips are in. I've got three-hundred-and-twenty acres picked out, uphere, and I'm going to file on 'em before these damned nesters get offthe train. Uh course, that won't be more'n a flea bite--but I can makeit interesting for my next door neighbors, anyway; and every flea bitehelps to keep a dog moving, yuh know."
"I'll go along and use my rights," Weary offered suddenly and seriously."That'll make one section they won't get, anyway."
Pink gave him a startled look across the table. "You ain't going to grabit, are yuh?" he demanded disappointedly.
"I sure am--if it's three-hundred-and-twenty acres of land you mean. IfI don't, somebody else will." He sighed humorously. "Next summer you'llsee me hoeing spuds, most likely--if the law says I GOT to."
"Haw-haw-haw-w!" laughed Big Medicine suddenly. "It'd sure be worth theprice, jest to ride up and watch you two marks down on all fours weedin'onions." He laughed again with his big, bull-like bellow.
"We don't have to do anything like that if we don't want to," put inAndy Green calmly. "I've been reading up on the law. There's one littlejoker in it I've got by heart. It says that homestead land can be usedfor grazing purposes if it's more valuable for pasture than for crops,and that actual grazing will be accepted instead of cultivation--if itis grazing land. So--"
"I betche you can't prove that," Happy lack interrupted him. "I neverheard of that before--"
"The world's plumb full of things you never heard of, Happy," Andy toldhim witheringly. "I gave Chip my copy of the homestead laws, and a platof the land up here; soon as he hands 'em back I can show you in coldprint where it says that very identical thing.
"That's what makes it look good to me, just on general principles," hewent on, his honest, gray eyes taking in the circle of attentive faces."If the bunch of us could pool our interests and use what rights we got,we can corral about four thousand acres--and we can head off outsidersfrom grazing in the Badlands, if we take our land right. We've beenoverlooking a bet, and don't you forget it. We've been fooling around,just putting in our time and drawing wages, when we could be owning ourown grazing land by now and shipping our own cattle, if we had enoughsense to last us overnight.
"A-course, I ain't crazy about turning nester, myself--but we've letthings slide till we've got to come through or get outa the game. It'sa fact, boys, about them dry-farmers coming in on us. That Minneapolisbunch that the blonde lady works for is sending out a colony of farmersto take up this land between here and the Bear Paws. The lady tipped herhand, not knowing where I ranged and thinking I wouldn't be interestedin anything but her. She's a real nice lady, too, and goodlooking--buta grafter to her last eye winker. And she hit too close home to suit me,when she named the place where they're going to dump their colony."
"Where does the graft come in?" inquired Pink cautiously. "The farmersget the land, don't they?"
"Sure, they get the land. And they pungle up a good-sized fee toFlorence Grace Hallman and her outfit, for locating 'em. Also there'sside money in it, near as I can find out. They skin the farmers somehowon the fare out here. That's their business, according to the lady. Theyprowl around through the government plats till they spot a few thousandacres of land in a chunk; they take a look at it, maybe, and then theyboom it like hell, and get them eastern marks hooked--them with money,the lady said. Then they ship a bunch out here, locate 'em on the landand leave it up to THEM, whether they scratch a living or not. She saidthey urge the rubes to bring all the stock they can, because there'splenty of range left. She says they play that up big. You can see foryourself how that'll work out, around here!"
Pink eyed him attentively, and suddenly his dimples stood deep. "Allright, I'm It," he surrendered.
"It'd be a sin not to fall for a yarn like that, Andy. I expect you madeit all up outa your own head, but that's all right. It's a pleasure tobe fooled by a genius like you. I'll go raising turnips and cabbagesmyself."
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"By golly, you couldn't raise nothing but hell up on that dry bench,"Slim observed ponderously. "There ain't any water. What's the use uhtalking foolish?"
"They're going to tackle it, just the same," Andy pointed out patiently.
"Well, by golly, if you ain't just lyin' to hear yourself, that theregraftin' bunch had oughta be strung up!"
"Sure, they had. Nobody's going to argue about that. But seeing we can'tdo that, the next best thing is to beat them to it. If they came outhere with their herd of pilgrims and found the land all took up--" Andysmiled hypnotically upon the goggling group.
"Haw-haw-haw-w!" bawled Big Medicine. "It'd be wuth it, by cripes!"
"Yeah--it would, all right. If that talk Andy's been giving us isstraight, about grazing the land instead uh working it--"
"You can mighty quick find out," Andy retorted. "Go up and ask Chipfor them land laws, and that plat. And ask him what he thinks about thedeal. You don't have to take my word for it." Andy grinned virtuouslyand pushed back his chair. From their faces, and the remarks they hadmade, he felt very confident of the ultimate decision. "What about you,Patsy?" he asked suddenly, turning to the bulky, bald German cook whowas thumping bread dough in a far corner. "You got any homestead ordesert rights you ain't used?"
"Py cosh, I got all der rights dere iss," Patsy returned querulously."I got more rights as you shmartys. I got soldier's rights mit fightin'.Und py cosh, I use him too if dem fellers coom by us mit der dry farmsalreatty!"
"Well, you son-of-a-gun!" Andy smote him elatedly upon a fat shoulder."What do you know about old Patsy for a dead game sport? By gracious,that makes another three hundred and twenty to the good. Gee, it's luckythis bunch has gone along turning up their noses at nesters and thinkin'they couldn't be real punchers and hold down claims too. If any of ushad had sense enough to grab a piece of land and settle down to raisefamilies, we'd be right up against it now. We'd have to set back andwatch a bunch of down-east rubes light down on us like flies on spiltmolasses, and we couldn't do a thing."
"As it is, we'll all turn nesters for the good of the cause!" finishedPink somewhat cynically, getting up and following Cal and Slim to thedoor.
"Aw, I betche they's some ketch to it!" gloomed Happy Jack. "I betcheAndy jest wants to see us takin' up claims on that dry bench, and thenset back and laugh at us fer bitin' on his josh."
"Well, you'll have the claims, won't you. And if you hang onto themthere'll be money in the deal some day. Why, darn your bomb-proof skull,can't you get it into your system that all this country's bound tosettle up?" Andy's eyes snapped angrily. "Can't you see the differencebetween us owning the land between here and the mountains, and a bunchof outsiders that'll cut it all up into little fields and try to farmit. If you can't see that, you better go hack a hole in your head withan axe, so an idea can squeeze in now and then when you ain't looking!"
"Well, I betche there ain't no colony comin' to settle that therebench," Happy Jack persisted stubbornly.
"Yes there is, by cripes!" trumpeted Big Medicine behind him. "Yes thereis! And that there colony is goin' to be us, and don't you forget it.It's time I was doin' somethin' fer that there boy uh mine, by cripes!And soon as we git that fence strung I'm goin' to hit the trail fer thenearest land office. Honest to grandma, if Andy's lyin' it's goin' to bethe prof't'blest lie HE ever told, er anybody else. I don't care a cussabout whether them dry-farmers is fixin' to light here or not. Thatthere land-pool looks good to ME, and I'm comin' in on it with all fourfeet!"
Big Medicine was nothing less than a human land slide when once he threwhimself into anything, be it a fight or a frolic. Now he blocked theway to the door with his broad shoulders and his big bellow and hisenthusiasm, and his pale, frog-like eyes fixed their protruding stareaccusingly upon the reluctant ones.
"Cal, you git up there and git that plat and bring it here," he ordered."And fer criminy sakes git that table cleared off, Patsy, so's't we kinhave a place to lay it! What's eatin' on you fellers, standin' aroundlike girls to a party, waitin' fer somebody to come up and ast you todance! Ain't you got head enough to see what a cinch we got, if we onlygot sense enough to play it! Honest to grandma you make me sick to lookat yuh! Down in Conconino County the boys wouldn't stand back and waitto be purty-pleased into a thing like this. You're so scared Andy's gota josh covered up somewheres, you wouldn't take a drink uh whisky if heast yuh up to the bar! You'd pass up a Chris'mas turkey, by cripes, ifyuh seen Andy washin' his face and lookin' hungry! You'd--"
What further reproach he would have heaped upon them was interrupted byChip, who opened the door just then and bumped Big Medicine in the back.In his hand Chip carried the land plat and the pamphlets, and in hiskeen, brown eyes he carried the light of battle for his outfit. The eyesof Andy Green sent bright glances from him to Big Medicine, and onto the others. He was too wise then to twit those others with theirunbelief. His wisdom went farther than that; for he remained verymuch in the background of the conversation and contented himself withanswering, briefly and truthfully, the questions they put to him aboutFlorence Grace Hallman and the things she had so foolishly divulgedconcerning her plans.
Chip spread the plat upon an end of the table hastily and effectuallycleared by a sweep of Big Medicine's arm, and the Happy Family crowdedclose to stare down at the checker-board picture of their own familiarbench land. They did not doubt, now--nor did they Hang back reluctantly.Instead they followed eagerly the trail Chip's cigarette-yellowed fingertook across the map, and they listened intently to what he said aboutthat trail.
The clause about grazing the land, he said, simplified matters a wholelot. It was a cinch you couldn't turn loose and dry-farm that land andhave even a fair chance of reaping a harvest. But as grazing land theycould hold all the land along One Man Creek--and that was a lot. And theland lying back of that, and higher up toward the foothills, theycould take as desert. And he maintained that Andy had been right inhis judgment: If they all went into it and pulled together theycould stretch a line of claims that would protect the Badland grazingeffectually.
"I wouldn't ask you fellows to go into this," said Chip, straighteningfrom his stooping over the map and looking from one sober face toanother, "just to help the outfit. But it'll be a good thing for youboys. It'll give you a foothold--something better than wages, if youstay with your claims and prove up. Of course, I can't say anythingabout us buying out your claims--that's fraud, according to Hoyle;but you ain't simple-minded--you know your land won't be begging for abuyer, in case you should ever want to sell.
"There's another thing. This will not only head off the dry-farmersfrom overstocking what little range is left--it'll make a dead-line forsheep, too. We've been letting 'em graze back and forth on the benchback here beyond our leased land, and not saying much, so long as theydidn't crowd up too close, and kept going. With all our claims underfence, do you realize what that'll mean for the grass?"
"Josephine! There's feed for considerable stock, right over there on ourclaims, to say nothing of what we'll cover," exclaimed Pink.
"I'd tell a man! And if we get water on the desert claims--" Chipgrinned down at him. "See what we've been passing up, all this time.We've had some of it leased, of course--but that can't be done again.There's been some wire-pulling, and because we ain't politicians we gotturned down when the Old Man wanted to renew the lease. I can see nowwhy it was, maybe. This dry-farm business had something to do with it,if you ask me."
"Gee whiz! And here we've been calling Andy a liar," sighed Cal Emmett.
"Aw, jest because he happened to tell the truth once, don't cut no ice,"Happy Jack maintained with sufficient ambiguity to avert the naturalconsequences.
"Of course, it won't be any gold-mine," Chip added dispassionately."But it's worth picking up, all right; and if it'll keep out a bunchof tight-fisted settlers that don't give a darn for anything but what'sinside their own fence, that's worth a lot, too."
"Say, my dad's a farmer," Pink declared defiantly in his soft treb
le."And while I think of it, them eastern farmers ain't so worse--not thebrand I've seen, anyway. They're narrow, maybe--but they're human.Damn it, you fellows have got to quit talking about 'em as if they wereblackleg stock or grasshoppers or something."
"We ain't saying nothing aginst farmers AS farmers, Little One" BigMedicine explained forebearingly. "As men, and as women, and as kids,they're mighty nice folks. My folks have got an eighty-acre farm inWisconsin," he confessed unexpectedly, "and I think a pile of 'em. Butif they was to come out here, trying to horn in on our range, I'd lead'em gently to the railroad, by cripes, and tell 'em goodbye so's'tthey'd know I meant it! Can't yuh see the difference?" he bawled,goggling at Pink with misleading savageness in his ugly face.
"Oh, I see," Pink admitted mildly. "I only just wanted to remind youfellows that I don't mean anything personal and I don't want you to.Say, what about One Man Coulee?" he asked suddenly. "That's markedvacant on the map. I always thought--"
"Sure, you did!" Chip grinned at him wisely, "because we used it fora line camp, you thought we owned a deed to it. Well, we don't. We hadthat land leased, is all."
"Say, by golly, I'll file on that, then," Slim declared selfishly. ForOne Man coulee, although a place of gruesome history, was also desirablefor one or two reasons. There was wood, for instance, and water, and acabin that was habitable. There was also a fence on the place, a corraland a small stable. "If Happy's ghost don't git to playin' music toomuch," he added with his heavy-handed wit.
"No, sir! You ain't going to have One Man coulee unless Andy, here, sayshe don't want it!" shouted Big Medicine. "I leave it to Chip if Andyhadn't oughta have first pick. He's the feller that's put us onto this,by cripes, and he's the feller that's going to pick his claim first."
Chip did not need to sanction that assertion. The whole Happy Familyagreed unanimously that it should be so, except Slim, who yielded a bitunwillingly.
Till midnight and after, they bent heads over the plat and made plansfor the future and took no thought whatever of the difficulties thatmight lie before them. For the coming colony they had no pity, andfor the balked schemes of the Homeseekers' Syndicate no compunctionswhatever.
So Andy Green, having seen his stratagem well on the way to success,and feeling once more the well-earned confidence of his fellows, sleptsoundly that night in his own bed, serenely sure of the future.