“You don’t have to do that. I just hate the mess.”
“It’s fine. If I help, it’ll get done faster.” She smiled sweetly at me and got to work putting stuff away. I was finding that there was a lot more to Lola than I originally thought. I had always pictured her as this badass warrior. I had met her several times through Sebastian, but I had never really bothered to learn her name or anything about her. Of course, at the time, I had been grieving over Cassie and any other women weren’t even a blip on my radar.
We finished up quickly and sat back down on the couch to finish up the movie. By the time we were on the last movie, it was late and Lola was dozing in my lap. Her warm breath fanned out across my leg and I smiled as I thought of how comfortable this was. My fingers started sliding through her silky strands, gently massaging her scalp each time I started to rake my fingers through.
It was so strange to feel this level of comfort with her after such a short time. I knew that I had to be careful though. I couldn’t let myself get too far ahead. I didn’t know if I could actually handle another relationship at this point and I wasn’t sure that Lola wanted one either. But for the rest of the night, I enjoyed having her in my house and in my life. No matter how long it lasted.
CHAPTER NINE
Lola
DO YOU WANT to come hang out with us?” Ryan asked over the phone.
“That depends. Will there be food?”
“Pizza.”
“Action, comedy, romance?”
“Sorry if you like romance, but we don’t watch those.”
“Neither do I.”
“Great, then get your ass over here.”
“I’m on my way.”
I hung up, grinning like an idiot and it hit me that all the times that I had slept with Hunter, I had never felt this way. He was a great friend and I loved spending time with him, and I really liked fucking him. But I was never excited to get to see him. I had been seeing Ryan now for a few months and every time we got together, it felt like it was growing into something stronger.
By the time I got to Ryan’s house, I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face to save my life. And when he answered the door and pulled me into his arms, giving me the most spine tingling kiss of my life, I knew that I was in over my head. I liked him way more than I ever thought I would like someone.
“Hey, beautiful.”
“Hi,” I smiled. I was staring at him like it was the first time I was seeing him and after a few moments, pulled my eyes away to stop from acting like some love-crazy fangirl. That wasn’t me. “So, did James decide what movie we’re watching?”
“He wanted to wait for you to choose.”
“Wow, I get to choose the movie? I feel special.”
“Well, I just got back with the pizza, so why don’t you go choose a movie while I get some plates?”
“Alright.”
I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch where James had a slew of movies set out. “So, what are my choices?”
“Well, I was trying to pick movies that I thought you might like. We have the new Jurassic World movie. There are the classics, Die Hard and Lethal Weapon.”
“What about this one?” I picked up The Lord of the Rings and waved it in front of his face.
“I wasn’t sure if you liked that kind of movie.”
“Are you kidding? It has some great battle scenes.”
He grinned at me with a smile that made me feel like I had just handed the kid a bag of gold. He got up and quickly put in the movie, grabbing a chair off to the side. Ryan winked at me as he came to sit down and handed out plates, napkins, and cans of pop.
“Have you ever read these books?” James asked excitedly.
“Yeah, the books are definitely better.”
“They usually are. I can’t think of a single movie that was better than the book. Like Harry Potter? Dad and I read the series together and the first two or three movies were pretty good, but by the fourth, they changed so much and I just didn’t like them as much.”
“I’ve never read the books, but from what I could tell, the movies weren’t bad. Maybe I’ll have to read them so I can compare them.”
James grinned and started turning on the movie. Ryan grasped my hand in his and gave a firm squeeze. “Do you really like this movie?”
“Of course. But I did choose it because I thought James would like it best. I figured you two had read the books together.”
“We did.”
The look on his face was somewhat like wonder and something else I didn’t want to name, but that couldn’t be. Things were still too new with us. We were just hanging out. He leaned in and gave me a soft kiss on the lips, his fingertips running along the length of my jaw. “Thank you,” he whispered.
The movie started and we dug into the pizza, devouring the whole thing in less than ten minutes. “Damn, I didn’t realize that you could eat like a guy. I should have gotten more pizza,” Ryan smiled. “Where do you put it?”
“Hey, food is fuel and I’m very active. I need to keep up my energy.”
“So, was this fueling your body for later tonight?” he whispered, nipping at my ear. Shivers ran down my spine and I glanced at James, just to make sure he wasn’t paying attention. “Are you staying with me tonight?”
“Is that okay? I don’t know what the protocol is for sleepovers when a kid is involved.”
“He won’t be attending this sleepover.”
I shoved at his chest and smiled. “You know what I mean. Are you okay with me being here when he’s in the house?”
Ryan pulled back and ran a hand through his hair. “Shit, I don’t know.”
“I just don’t want to make him uncomfortable. I’ve never had a kid, so I don’t know what you want to do.”
“Maybe we should just wait. Do you want to come over tomorrow night?”
“Yeah. Honestly, I’m not sure I’m comfortable with doing…you know, when he’s here.”
“You guys know that I can hear you over the movie, right? You’re not being as quiet as you think,” James said, still watching the movie.
My eyes went wide and I slapped a hand over my mouth. Shit, this was really bad.
“She can stay, you know. I know that you have sex. Just don’t be too loud.”
I covered my face, completely embarrassed that James was talking about sex with us. It was just weird.
“Well, I guess that answers our question,” Ryan muttered.
We stayed up for the rest of the first movie, but by the time it ended, James was half asleep in his chair. He mumbled something about going to sleep and headed upstairs. Even though he had basically given us permission to have sex with him here, it was still weird and I didn’t know if I should leave.
“Um, so, should I head out?” I asked Ryan.
“Stay,” he said quietly.
“Are you sure?”
He nodded and stood, holding his hand out for me. I placed my hand in his and followed him to his bedroom. It was different tonight than the other times I stayed over. This was more intimate. Every time I had come over before, we were always rushing to get each other’s clothes off. This time, he led me into the bedroom and pushed me slowly onto the bed. My eyes trailed over his body as he removed his shirt, pulling the tails out from the waistband of his pants and unbuttoning from the top to the bottom.
He wasn’t built like the guys at Reed Security. He had muscles and he took care of his body, but he wasn’t built like he was ready for war and I really liked that. He had a softness about him that the men I worked with tended to hide from. Working with those men was great, but sometimes I needed to feel like a regular woman that was wanted by a regular man. I didn’t want to always be seen as the badass woman that could take out someone with my bare hands. I wanted to be a woman that was treated gently and cherished. I couldn’t have that persona around my teammates, but around Ryan, I could finally let down my guard and just be a girl needing something special.
When he pulled off his pants, I couldn’t help but stare at his cock pushing against the fabric of his boxers. He climbed over me and kissed me, trailing his tongue over my body as he undressed me. Soon, I was bare under him and feeling him rocking inside my body. There wasn’t a nerve ending inside me that wasn’t on fire. Every part of me craved his touch and hardness of his body pressed against mine.
I felt a connection with him that I had never felt with any other man. It was electric and intense. It was a bonding of two broken souls that were slowing piecing each other back together. It was something like love.
As we laid together in the darkness of the room, his fingers slowly trailed up and down my back. His heart was beating a steady rhythm that slowly lulled me into a sleepy state. The soft press of his lips against my head brought a faint smile to my lips right before I drifted into dreamless slumber.
✯✯✯✯✯
“Hey, beautiful.” Ryan’s soft voice broke through the fog of sleep and I groaned, not wanting to get up. I could feel the warm rays of the sun pouring across the bed and warming my skin.
“I don’t want to get up yet.”
“You don’t have to. James is going to be up soon. I’m gonna start breakfast. His grandparents are picking him up in a few hours.”
“Mmm-Hmm,” I responded. I heard him chuckle slightly and then he kissed my cheek.
“I liked you staying with me last night. We’ll have to do that more often. Go back to sleep.”
I heard the soft snick of the door and then silence. I went back to sleep and when I woke again, I felt more refreshed than I had in years. I sat up, pulling the sheet with me and looked out the window at the beautiful view of the trees. Ryan really did have a touch of paradise here. Since I didn’t have anything to do today and Ryan had made it clear that I could stay in bed, I sank back down into the comfort of his bed, staring out the window and wondering if I could have more of this someday.
When the door opened, I smiled at Ryan standing there looking at me with a sexy grin. He was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and his hair was tousled in a sexy, just fucked look. “Are you going to get up any time today?”
“Maybe. I was just enjoying the comfort of your bed. I haven’t slept that good in years.”
“Me too.”
“What time is it?”
“Ten.”
“Oh, wow. What time are Cassie’s parents coming?”
“They’ll be here in an hour. I made some breakfast, but I’m pretty sure it’s cold now since you’ve slept the morning away.”
“I couldn’t help it. With the sun coming in and the beautiful scenery, I didn’t want to leave the room.”
He walked over to me and knelt down on the bed beside me. “I can’t blame you there. Come on, get up and eat some breakfast. I’ll grab some coffee for you.”
“You know, if James wasn’t still here, I would try to lure you back to bed.”
“If that door was closed, I would let you.”
“If I didn’t have such good hearing, I wouldn’t be on the verge of throwing up right now,” James shouted from the hallway.
I covered my face and shook my head. “I’m definitely not used to a kid being around.”
“Does it bother you?” Ryan asked. I could see the worry in his eyes. We had had a great night and things were starting to go somewhere between us. He was worried that I wouldn’t be able to deal with the whole package.
“No. And even if it did, I would just have to deal with it. He’s a great kid. I just have to get used to watching what I say.”
He leaned forward and kissed me, his fingers gliding along my cheek in a gentle caress. His tongue flicked across my lips as he pulled back. “Breakfast,” he said in a low, gravelly voice. He got up and left, shutting the door behind him. I wanted to stay in bed longer, but James was a part of Ryan’s life and if I was going to be here, I couldn’t hide from his son. I got up and took a quick shower, throwing on my jeans from yesterday and one of Ryan’s t-shirts. At least it would appear that I wasn’t wearing the same outfit.
When I walked into the kitchen, Ryan had a plate of waffles warmed up for me on a plate with a mug of coffee beside it.
“Mmm. This looks delicious.”
“Well, it was two hours ago. I don’t know how it will taste right now.”
I shrugged. “Ever had an MRE?”
“Can’t say that I have.”
“Eat one of those and you’ll never complain about food again.”
I took a bite of the waffles and sighed in delight. I didn’t cook very often and most of my meals were take out or freezer meals. I ate in just a few minutes and then picked up my mug of coffee to enjoy.
“If you want, there’s a nice view off the deck,” Ryan suggested. I followed him out there and sat down in a beautiful adirondack chair. It was still chilly this morning since it was only early spring, but Ryan had brought out a blanket and wrapped it around me. I snuggled into the chair with my coffee and relaxed.
“Wow. These are really nice.”
“James and I built them with his grandfather for Cassie. She loved sitting outside.”
“How does James deal with his mom’s death?”
He shrugged. “He’s doing okay. I wish I could really say, but we don’t talk about her very much.”
“Why don’t you talk about her?”
“Too painful,” he said quietly.
I didn’t say anything to that, even though I was thinking that it had to be hard on James for him to never discuss Cassie. I understood not wanting to talk about something painful.
James stepped out onto the deck and sat down in one of the chairs, drinking a bottle of water.
“So, what are you doing with your grandparents this weekend?” I asked James.
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Grandpa usually has some woodworking projects that we do. He’s taking me out driving for a few hours.”
I noticed that Ryan tensed at that, but didn’t say anything. “When you get home, I was thinking we should pick out a new series to read.”
“I’ve actually been thinking of reading The DaVinci Code,” James said.
“Okay. I’ll pick it up this weekend.”
His grandparents pulled in the driveway and we all walked inside. His grandparents let themselves in and James was at the door waiting with his bag. This time I didn’t try to hide my scar from them.
“Lola, it’s so nice to see you again. Do you two have plans for the weekend?” Jane asked.
Ryan wrapped his arm around me and pulled me in close. “We haven’t really decided yet,” Ryan responded for me.
“Do I get to drive to your house?” James asked excitedly.
“Of course. It’ll get in a good hour of the time you need.”
“Just don’t-” Ryan started, but Calvin cut him off with a raised hand.
“I know.”
I wasn’t sure what he was referring to, but Ryan nodded and a few minutes later, they were out the door. That whole thing felt strange to me. Things were so different when James was hanging out with Ryan, but this morning, things felt strained.
“Is everything okay?” I asked him.
“Sure. Why?”
“It’s just, it feels like maybe there was some tension this morning. Was that because I’m here?”
Ryan shook his head and ran his fingers through his black hair. “It doesn’t have anything to do with you. It’s been like this for a while now. Every time he goes off to his grandparents’ house, things get weird.”
“You don’t want him to go?”
“I do,” he said quietly. “That’s the problem. I love that kid more than life itself, but…sometimes it’s just overwhelming and I need a break.”
“That’s understandable. You’re basically a single parent.”
He snorted. “Cassie did it for years by herself.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t have James from the start. She did. They formed a different bond. You have to cut yourself some slack.
”
“I just feel like I’m fucking everything up. I don’t know that he wants to be going over there all the time, but I don’t want to stop him from going either. He’s their only connection to Cassie, but I think he resents me for sending him there so often.”
“Have you tried talking to him about it?”
He shook his head. “You know, I used to be really good at talking to him about shit, but the more time that goes on, the worse I get at it.”
I felt bad for him, but I didn’t have any advice to give. The closest I came to having a kid was watching Cap’s kid occasionally, and even that gave me hives.
“I think I’m going to head home,” I said, leaving my coffee mug by the sink.
“You don’t have to leave.”
“I’m just gonna get some more sleep. Even after the best night of sleep of my life, I feel like I could finally sleep all day.”
He walked up to me and wrapped his hands around my waist. “Stay. You can sleep here.”
“Are you sure?”
He kissed me hard, his hand slipping up to the nape of my neck and winding through my hair. “I’m sure I don’t want you to leave yet.”
I nodded and let him lead me back to his room where we did not sleep for the next two hours.
✯✯✯✯✯
“Would you just shut up, woman?” I turned to see Ice walking into the bar, followed by a very testy looking Lindsey. Ryan and I had come to the bar for dinner after spending the whole day lounging in his bed. I was in the mood for some good food and I didn’t want to cook anything. Neither did Ryan and that’s how we ended up here.
“Seriously, would it kill you clean up your shit?” Lindsey snapped at Ice.
“It’s my damn house. I can leave it as dirty as I want,” he snapped. He saw Ryan and I and immediately walked over to our table, slumping down on a stool. “That woman is driving me fucking nuts.”
Lola: A Reed Security Romance (Reed Security Series Book 8) Page 13