Chapter Thirteen
"Aren't you going to say hello, Tess?" Ryan Kirkland said as he stepped inside the hospital closing and locking the door behind him.
Tessa trembled as she stepped back and quickly moved behind the counter.
"Wha-what are you doing here?" She cursed herself for the tremor in her voice and wished she had her cell.
Ryan chuckled as he stared at her. "What you mean is…how did I find you?"
Tessa didn’t say anything. Her eyes glanced from him to the door and back again. He continued to stare at her.
"It took me over two fucking years to find you," he hissed, his anger showing, making her tremble with fear.
Terror engulfed Tessa, her worst nightmare had come true, and he stood in front of her. Mentally shaking her head, she couldn't let him see her fear because it gave him control. She straightened up, squared her shoulders, and glared at him.
"Get out of my hospital." Her jaw clenched as she ordered him and wishing they weren’t alone. Never let him see your fear was her mantra. It had taken her too long to realize she shouldn't show fear since he thrived on it.
Ryan burst out laughing. "Finally growing some balls, huh?" He walked forward and leaned across the counter. "Too little, too late, babe…I spent every waking minute looking for you. I’ve had men searching every corner of this country. One of them has been here since July, but it took time to discover if it was you or not. The name change was a clever idea but you can’t hide those looks. I would’ve come sooner but business kept me tied up and I couldn’t leave. But I’m here now, and you and I are going to take up where—"
“No,” Tessa shouted. “I want you to leave or I’ll call the sheriff.”
“Is that the same sheriff you’ve been fucking? Does he know about me?”
“Get out, Ryan. Now!”
“Let me tell you something, Tess. No one walks away from me and you should know that. My guy has told me all about you and him. I’ve seen the pictures, and I know you’ve been screwing the sheriff. At first, I thought he was just a deputy until I saw him in the diner. You always went for the top shelf, didn’t you, Tess. No deputy would do for you. You had to have the sheriff. I’ll ask you again, does he know about me?”
Tessa picked up the phone. “I’m calling the sheriff,” she repeated, her hand shaking as she pressed the numbers on the pad.
Ryan stared at her and then gave a terse nod. “Fine, but this is not over. You and I will talk, and I have a feeling you haven’t been truthful with him.” He spun on his heel and walked out the front door leaving it standing open.
Tessa dropped the phone back into its cradle and collapsed into the chair behind the counter. Her heart was pounding in her head so loud she barely heard anything else. How had he found her? She thought she’d covered her tracks. She placed her hands over her face.
Dear God! What was she going to do? Knowing it was the only thing that she could do now, she had to tell Sam the truth, and he was going to hate her for it. A tear slid down her cheek. If only she’d been honest from the start. She loved him so much and by lying to him all this time, he would feel betrayed. Not that she could blame him. She was a fool. Tears flowed freely as she cried as if her heart were breaking. In all likelihood, it was.
****
Sam heard the front door open and since he was the only one available, he stepped out of his office into the hall where he could see directly to the lobby. There he saw one of the strangers he’d seen in the diner, standing in the lobby.
“May I help you?” Sam asked leaning against the doorway leading to the hall, but he kept one hand on his holstered weapon. Something about the man rubbed him the wrong way and he wanted to be prepared.
“I want you to stay away from my wife,” the man said through clenched teeth.
“Your wife?” Sam straightened. His gut never led him wrong.
“Tess is my wife.”
Feeling as if he’d been slammed in the chest, Sam tried his best to stay calm and hoped the man was talking about someone else named Tess. “Tess?”
“You know who I’m talking about…Tessa Kirkland…right, you know her as Tessa McGuire,” the man said stepping closer. “Whatever name she’s going by, she’s my wife.”
“I don’t believe you,” Sam said, even as his gut clenched and he feared it was the truth.
“Ask her. We’d been married for two years when she disappeared. We...we had an argument and she just took off. It took me a long time to find her but now that I have, she’ll be coming home to Pennsylvania with me.”
Sam didn’t move. “If she left you then, what makes you think she’d return with you now?” His head was beginning to throb and he actually felt sick to his stomach.
“She will, I’ll persuade her. She belongs with me.”
“You can’t make her go if she doesn’t want to. I’ll see to that.” Sam knew he’d do his job if Tessa didn’t want to leave with this man, if he was truly her husband. That he would have to hear from her lips. He hated the thought that she’d been lying to him all these months.
“I’m not afraid of you.”
“You should be,” Sam said with deadly calm.
“Is that a threat, Sheriff?”
Sam pushed away from the wall and stepped forward. “You’re God damn right it is. Now, get out of here.”
“Tess belongs to me. Her running off doesn’t change that. I will take her home with me. She belongs with me, and not in this shit hole town.”
“You need to grow some balls, realize she doesn’t want to be with you, and just let her go.”
“Why? So you can have her? Over my dead body.”
Sam sneered. “Deal.”
“You have no idea who you’re fucking with—other than my wife.”
“Why would you want her if she’s fucking around on you?”
“Because she belongs to me,” the man shouted in anger and frustration.
“She’s not a possession.” The muscle in Sam’s cheek twitched as he tried to hold on to his anger.
“The hell she isn’t. She is my possession, she’s my fucking wife, and she’ll leave here with me.”
“Not if I have anything to say about it.”
“You won’t have any say in it at all. You ask Tess about me. Ryan Kirkland.” He stared at Sam. “A real shame if something should happen to you, Sheriff.”
Sam clenched his fists. “Are you threatening an officer of the law?”
Kirkland smirked. “Oh, no. That’s not a threat at all, Sheriff.” He turned and walked out letting the door swing shut behind him.
Sam put his hands on his hips, hung his head, and took deep breaths then he raised his head, drew a fist back and punched a hole in the wall. Shaking his hand to ease the pain, he entered his office where he jerked his coat from the hall tree, nearly making it fall. He grabbed his hat and slapped it on his head as he stormed out the back door, slamming it behind him. Once outside, he sucked the cold air into his lungs and climbed into his vehicle. Wrapping his hands around the steering wheel, he swore as he started the vehicle, threw it into gear, and drove to Tessa’s. Sam was angry, confused, and hurt. If what this man said was true, she’d lied to him—every day—straight to his face. He wanted answers.
Did you lie to me, Tessa?
He swore as he drove around to the back of the hospital and slammed on the brakes, making the vehicle slide sideways. Shutting off the engine, he sat there staring out the windshield seeing nothing. He clenched his jaw as he thought about walking up those stairs and confronting her. Taking a deep breath, in all fairness, he had to give her the benefit of the doubt. This guy…this Ryan Kirkland…might be a fruitcake who was yanking his chain. He’d give her a chance to explain or deny.
Taking another deep breath, he exhaled, threw the door open, and stepped out of the vehicle. He stared up the metal stairs toward her door then started to climb them. Stopping in front of her door, he hesitated then pounded on it. The door opened and she stood ther
e smiling at him. He pushed down the anger and the hurt. He loved her and didn’t want any of this to be true. He moved past her into the room.
“Sam?”
“I had a visitor at the station,” Sam said without turning around.
“Who?” Her voice wavered and his heart sank when he heard the anxiety in her voice.
Sam spun around to face her. “Ryan Kirkland, your husband.”
Tessa gasped, her hands flying to her face. “Sam, please, you have to let me explain.”
“Explain what, exactly? Explain that you’re married. Are you married?” When she didn’t answer him, he shouted. “Are you?”
“Yes, but...”
“You lied to me. You lied every day—straight to my face. All this time, all you’ve done is lie.”
“From the beginning, I told you I didn’t want to get involved with you, Sam. I had my reasons.” A tear rolled down her cheek but he didn’t care.
“Then you should have told me.”
“I didn’t know how.”
“How hard was it to say you were married? You should have told me the first time I kissed you. Hell, any fucking time before or after would have done. I don’t fool around with married women.” He laughed without humor. “Apparently I do. Fuck!”
He strode away to the door.
“Please...listen to me, Sam. Please,” she begged. “I’m terrified. I don’t know what to do.”
Sam hesitated because of her plea. He didn’t want to hear any more of her lies, and although he kept his hand on the doorknob, he couldn’t bring himself to open it.
“I’m sorry, Sam. I couldn’t take the chance of filing for divorce and letting him find me…and kill me.”
“Kill you? That sounds a little over dramatic.”
“No. You don’t know him, Sam. He’s ruthless. He has associations with the mob.”
“Yet, you married him.” He refused to turn around and look at her.
“I didn’t know that when I married him. He’s the CEO for Santros.” Sam had heard of Santros, it was a large beverage distributor. “I figured that’s where all his money came from, not dealing in murder and money laundering. It’s why I know he’d kill me if he found me. No one leaves Ryan Kirkland unless he wants them to.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me this.” Sam hung his head.
“Aren’t you listening to me? As far as I am concerned I haven’t been married for years, Sam.”
“Bullshit,” he roared as he turned to face her. “Just because you’re not with him doesn’t mean you aren’t married. You have a legal piece of paper stating the opposite. Son of a bitch,” he muttered as he shook his head and turned away from her. He couldn’t bear to look at her because he hurt so much he couldn’t bear it.
“That piece of paper doesn’t mean anything to me,” she said, her voice trembling.
Sam turned and glared at her. “Well, it does to me. If only you’d told me, maybe…”
“Sam—”
Sam threw his hand up. “No. I don’t want to hear any more of this.” He took a shuddering breath. “I can’t fucking believe this. If you cared at all you wouldn’t have lied to me, Tessa.”
“I do care. I couldn’t tell you. I didn’t know how, I was afraid to tell you.”
Sam watched another tear roll down her cheek. “All you had to do was tell me. Where did you think this was going, Tessa?” He waved his hand between them.
“This is why I didn’t want to get involved, Sam. I thought we’d just—”
“Just what? Fuck?” Sam clenched his jaw so hard he was surprised his teeth didn’t shatter. “We both knew after the first time we had sex, it was different…at least, I thought it was. Holy hell, Tessa…I’m in love with you,” he shouted.
“Sam, I love—”
“Do not say it,” he snarled.
“Sam, please. He found me and I’m scared.”
“Get a restraining order.”
“A piece of paper isn’t going to stop him,” Tessa shouted.
“It sure as hell didn’t stop you either, did it?”
“Please listen to me. Please. I should have listened to my parents. They didn’t like him—not at all. Daddy hated him on sight. Mom told me he was bad news.” She shrugged. “I thought I was in love. Since my dad refused to give me away to Ryan, we got married at the courthouse. Not the dream wedding I’d always wanted, but it was all I could do. I hated hurting my parents, but they forgave me when I crawled home to them.”
“Crawled?” Sam asked then could have kicked himself because he didn’t want to care anymore.
“A month after we were married, I found out he had a mistress but he refused to leave her. I didn’t understand it. I thought he loved me.”
Sam hissed in a breath because it reminded him of Katie’s first husband. “He just wanted to own you—control you.”
Tessa nodded. “Yes, that’s what Mom said too. I told him I was leaving him and he said he’d never let me go. He always worked long hours so I knew I had a chance to get out while he was gone…or at least, I thought I did. He came home just as I was about to walk out the door and he…he beat me and told me I would always belong to him and that if I tried to leave him again, he’d kill me. He told me there was no sense in reporting him for domestic violence because the police were his friends, and they’d take his side. I believed him, but it didn’t stop me, Sam. I played it cool for a while with him. I acted as if I was fine with everything. I hated letting him touch me.
It was Aunt Lil, who saved me. She’s so rich it’s actually rather mind-boggling. The cabin, the one she owns in Kalispell where we were going to visit her, is where I hid for almost six months, she had me flown there. She has a private jet so no one knew. I told Ryan I was going to have lunch with Mom one day and since he thought everything was fine, he was all right with it. I knew he’d have me followed because I was anytime I left the house. My aunt Lil and Mom had come up with this elaborate scheme. I hid in the trunk of Aunt Lil’s car, which she’d parked in the garage. When she left my mom’s house, I knew the man following me would think she was alone since he could only see Aunt Lil when she drove past him. She drove me straight to the airport and gave me money to buy clothes because I had left everything behind. She actually gave me one of her credit cards to use. I only sent text messages to my parents and her, on a burner phone.
I stayed in Kalispell until Aunt Lil got things set up for me. She paid for everything. I don’t know what I would’ve done without her. I had my last name changed to my great-grandmother’s maiden name. Aunt Lil helped me with that too, and she said he’d never know about it. She has the money to do anything she wants and being married to the judge helped. He was the one who did the name change, off the books I guess you could say. I wanted to work and I saw the ad for the hospital for sale here in Clifton. Doc Carter suggested I come here and work with him before I made a decision to buy it. One more thing Aunt Lil helped me with that she refuses to let me pay her back. Doc Carter said since it was a small town I might not like it. Honestly, I didn’t at first but then I made friends, and it’s grown on me. I love it here now. It’s my home. Sam, I’ve been looking over my shoulder for two years hoping he’d never find me here…”
He glanced at her when her voice faded off. Tears streamed down her cheeks and she stared at the floor, wringing her hands.
“I knew not to get involved with you. I told you I thought you’d be easy to fall for, and I did. I know you hate me right now, but I wouldn’t change one minute of the time I’ve had with you. I love you, Sam. Do you know why I love you? I love you because of the way you look at me—like I’m the most important thing in the world to you.”
Sam couldn’t look at her again because he knew if he did, he’d take her in his arms. His heart ached so hard he thought he was going to die. She’d betrayed his trust, his love. He needed to go.
“Say something, Sam,” she whispered on a quiet sob.
“You want me to say some
thing? All right, I will. All of this has been a fucking lie. You said you didn’t want to get involved yet you let me get involved. You say you love me, how can you when you couldn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth? Okay, it’s true that if you’d told me you were married, I might not have pursued you but then again, had I known the circumstances, maybe I could have helped you. But no, you used me, betrayed me, led me to believe that you cared and that you were free to be with me. You knew how I’d feel about you not being free to be with me one hundred percent, and then you lied to me about it.” Tessa started to say something but he held up his hand, stopping her. “Lying by omission is lying all the same. All you had to do was say two simple words—I’m married. Maybe I would have walked away, maybe not but now we’ll never know. Instead, you took my heart and crushed it.” She had indeed crushed his heart and he needed to distance himself, and fast. “I’m done with this, Tessa. I’m done with you.”
Sam opened the door then glanced back over his shoulder. “Goodbye.”
He pulled the door closed and after taking a deep breath, walked down the stairs and away from the woman who he knew would always hold his heart, but not his trust.
Chapter Fourteen
Tessa ran to the door and pulled it open. She watched him walk down the steps and called out his name. He hesitated but then continued down the steps and climbed into his SUV. Without even glancing in her direction, he drove off. Tears tore at her throat as she stepped back inside, closed the door, and leaned against it before sliding to the floor where she released gut wrenching sobs.
Sam was right. She should have told him right away. He might have walked away leaving her to never know what a truly amazing man he was and how it was possible to love someone as much as she loved him but then again, he might have stayed. He might have helped her solve her problem but she screwed it all up, and now her life would never be the same. Without Sam in it, it was no life at all.
Sam Men of Clifton, Montana Book 7 Page 17