by Dakota Krout
“Good morning, Sunshine!” Jaxon called to her with a wide smile. He wanted to be friendly with her, but he had really needed the supplies he would have been getting from the Wolfmen. Jaxon had heard a few rumors about the trip that was making him want to be extra cautious, and bringing enough to satisfy his basic needs would be hard to do if he had to keep giving out freebies. All of this added up to him being a tish upset that she had been captured. “So… I kept the Wolfmen from eating you while you were asleep, but it cost me quite a bit. I am going to need you to reimburse me.”
Jess reached for her dagger, determined to end this fool even if it took a head-on fight. Her palm slapped against her pants, and she went pale instantly. It was gone! Her Graverobber’s Kris! She couldn’t loot his body without it and losing it was enough to lose her chance at admittance to the guild no matter what she did. “Mother-”
“Hey! Please keep your voice down. You don’t want to… this should be good.” Jaxon shifted around on his seat as the lady turned and ran away from him. She got eight feet away before a Warrior appeared out of the rain and loomed over her. It slapped her in the chest at full force with a snarl, sending her tumbling back almost to her starting position, this time gasping for air and bleeding. “I may not have had a chance to mention that we are in a Wolfman stronghold. The only reason you are alive is that I bartered for your life. Now, according to your health bar, if you want to go back to your spawn point, you can try that again. Otherwise, you are going to have to leave with me and find a way back to the humans.”
“Leave with you?” Jess suddenly had hope in her eyes; maybe she could convince him to take her willingly to wherever he was going. If she was able to secure a treasure trove, perhaps the guild would be forgiving about the loss of the dagger. It wasn’t like a rival guild had the weapon; it had been stolen by a Wolfman! “Sorry I tried to run, I freaked out a little. I’m Jess. Thank you for saving me.”
“Well! Proper manners!” Jaxon clapped lightly as his eyes lit up. “Wonderful, I had been thinking that no one remembered that ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ were words still in circulation! They play a game and become unaccountably rude for no reason other than it ‘isn’t real’. You are very welcome, and… perhaps I was a bit hasty in demanding payment. Payment probably shouldn’t be required not to be eaten. That should be normal, right? Right.”
Jess started thinking that she had made a huge mistake. Her group had been chasing him because they thought this man had wealth and influence, but up close, it was easy to see that his gear was at low durability and he was just strange and intimidating. It was likely that people hadn’t been avoiding him for fear of his social power; they had just been avoiding interacting with him! She put her face in her hands. “I know I don’t seem to have much choice, so I’d be happy to wait. But, if you don’t mind my asking, where are you going?”
She was expecting the worst, so his next words made her perk up in abject glee. “Going? Oh. I’m going to a temple that gives out amazing rewards for clearing challenges. I’m not sure if it will be super rare items, skills, classes, or just a river of gold, but it’s only a few days away.”
“Are you messing with me?” She looked at his face, which only showed uncertain confusion alongside his creepily ever-present smile. It was like looking at a skeleton.
“Why would I do that?”
Jess broke into a brilliant smile. “Is there any way that I could work off my debt to you? Perhaps you need a travel companion to help keep watch at night?”
“I’m not really into that sort of thing, thanks. I prefer to date and such. I’m not a person who pays for company and working it off isn’t…” Jaxon smiled at her apologetically, but as her face turned red, he finally dropped his smile and appeared startled. “Oh! I apologize! You mean like moving along as a party? I can’t do that, sorry. I’m on a solitary quest and adding anyone to my party will cause me to fail it.”
“Ahem.” Jess cleared her throat and tried again. She needed him to take her along! “If we are just traveling to the same place, not in a party, is that acceptable?”
“No,” Jaxon snapped at her, eyes full of fury. She reeled back, and Jaxon coughed into his hand. “No, I don’t see any reason that wouldn’t work. Sure, let’s be travel buddies!”
“U-um. Okay then?” Jess wasn’t sure what to say; what would set off the freaky man, and what would be fine? She had to play it safe. If he discovered that she planned to rob him, it would be difficult to escape from the area. Perhaps flattery was the best option to throw him off the trail? “What are you doing here, by the way? How did you get the Wolfmen to respect you enough not to attack you on sight?”
Jaxon’s smile seemed to become flirtatious, and he gestured at the collapsible bed he was sitting on. Or was it a padded table of some kind? “Why don’t you lay down and I’ll show you exactly what I can do for you. I’ve been told that my hands are magical. You’ll feel better than you have in years.”
“Ah. No, no thanks.” Jess lost any vestige of a smile. How could this filthy man proposition her so blatantly, so publicly? Sicko. What a disgusting waste of space. “When are you going to want to leave here?”
“I would say…” Jaxon looked around at the stronghold, which was swiftly beginning to smell like wet dog. He had no interest in seeing what drying dog smelled like here. “As soon as the rain stops?”
Chapter Ten
“So, I just wanted to say thank you once more for your hospitality!” Jaxon was standing at the back of the stronghold, attempting to get into the wilderness to continue his quest. Unfortunately, several Warriors were blocking his path. “Now that the pleasantries are out of the way, how about you do the same?”
The Warriors chuffed, all three of them standing head and shoulders above the tall Monk. Broken English flowed from a muzzle, “You stay, refine bodies of The People.”
Jaxon had learned that the Wolfmen tribes referred to themselves collectively as ‘The People’. “Let me put it like this. If The People don’t get out of the way, they are going to meet the fist.” He shook a clenched hand at the Warriors to no avail. His intimidation was raging at full power, but the Wolfmen merely chuffed their brand of laughter at him.
“Fine, fine, feisty human!” Jaxon’s hair was ruffled by a massive paw. “We move. We see you soon anyway. Take look.”
The Wolfman gestured expansively, and Jaxon followed his movements to see a huge line of flat terrain curving away into the distance on either side of the stronghold. “You see? Is… totem guide. This place is trial, not kill zone. You is get close dead, you show up right there. No fun, though, lose strength, lose memories.” Now he pointed at a flat, black rock which was where the line intersected.
“We die or get too close to dying, and we will respawn there instead of our bind point?” Jess gasped at the implication. “We’d still lose experience? Jaxon, if I die in there, I die twice.”
“Oh, yeah. Is correct.” The Warrior nodded at her words and slapped Jaxon gently on the back. Gently for his race anyway. “Female, you come back without this one, we eat well. Okay! Cute, little smooth-skins, you go fun have.”
Jaxon and Jess watched them go back to their post, and Jaxon shook his head. “Can you believe that? They–”
Jess interrupted in a rush of emotion, “Threatened us? Plan on eating me? Assume we are going to die out there?”
“–think we’re cute!” Jaxon finished blandly. “Hmm? Did you say something?”
Jess shook her head, tongue-tied and confused by this strange man that the Wolfmen seemed to like so much. They clambered over the wall, Jess carefully lowering herself while Jaxon jumped and arrested his movement by flipping in midair and turning the motion into a somersault on the ground. From there, he popped up to his feet and cheered for himself. “He stuck the landing! He’s awarded a nine, a nine point five, and oooh, too bad! The Russian judge gives him a two!”
“What are you doing?” Jess’s words made Jaxon flinch and get into
a fighting position.
“What in the… oh, right, it’s Jess.” Jaxon stood straight and brushed some dust off his robe. “Good lord, you are a forgettable one, aren’t you? As to your question, I spend quite a bit of time alone and have found that monologuing helps to maintain mental alacrity.”
Jess simply stared at him with her mouth open, not quite able to believe what an absolute jerk this man was. Her fingers twitched toward her empty sheath, angry that she had been disarmed. Wait a second… “Jaxon, I don’t have any weapons. We need to go back.”
The Monk didn’t bother to turn around, simply twirling a hand in the air. “If you want to go back, feel free. I won’t be waiting for you, but I’m sure ‘The People’ will welcome you back with open arms and a wide smile. Otherwise, we are just going to have to make do!”
Jess looked back, indeed seeing a Warrior pointing at her with a wide ‘smile’. He made a ‘finger across the throat’ gesture when they locked eyes. She shuddered and followed Jaxon, who was almost far enough away that the Scouts on the defensive wall would start attacking her. There were whines of disappointment as she got closer to the Monk, and her mood darkened further. Jess needed to make sure she was ready to escape when the moment came. To that end, she lowered her center of balance by crouching and slunk after Jaxon.
To her dismay, he didn’t look back a single time as he was walking, and she seriously wondered if he had forgotten that she was walking with him again. When he started speaking aloud, she perked up, excited to have a conversation. Then she heard him start singing, “The foot bone connects to the… leg bone! The leg bone connects to the… knee bone! The knee bone connects to the… thigh bone!”
“Stop singing!” Jess snapped at him. “Why? Why are you even singing that song?”
Jaxon looked back, not seeing her even though her noise had partially broken stealth mode. “Who’s talking? Oh. Jess. Right. Seriously, can you wear a bell or something? I was singing that children’s song because it a pleasing reminder of where my occupation began, even though it is not exactly anatomically accurate. That song has been stuck in my head for… oh, I don’t know. Twenty years or so?”
Jess really wanted to know what trick of this game had made her select this crazy man to follow. She promised herself that if she got out of this area, Jaxon was going to be on the receiving side of her daggers even if she couldn’t loot his body! In fact… he couldn’t see her right now. Not at all. She crept forward, her hands going on either side of his head. Not stopping to think, she brutally grabbed him and twisted his head to the side. His eyes were now locked with hers, his head almost facing the wrong direction.
Her cold smile at Jaxon’s confused look faltered as he started speaking, “Are you licensed for this sort of work? Thanks, but I think I have a higher skill in adjustments than you do. That did absolutely nothing for me.”
Face turning pale, Jess stumbled backward and nearly retched as Jaxon’s head righted itself, and he kept moving at a brisk pace. He didn’t even consider that an attack? What kind of monster was she traveling with? She went to ask him a question, and her luck wore out. Jaxon’s horrendous charisma kicked in, and no matter what it was that she actually said, this is what he heard, “Jaxon, I crouch all day in stealth mode, and I think it is messing with my posture. Can you help?”
Jaxon whipped around, face ecstatic and fingers wiggling furiously. “I would love to get my hands on you! I’ll show you exactly how amazing I can make you feel!”
Jess flushed red and dodged away from him as he reached out for her, sure that something either gross or dangerous was occurring. Jaxon was breathing erratically, and all she could think of was that he was suddenly trying to take revenge for her attempt at snapping his neck. “I’m so sorry, Jaxon! It won’t happen again. I swear I’ll be a good travel companion!”
“What? What are you talking about?” Jaxon’s fingers stopped shifting slowly, seemingly knowing that they wouldn’t be working right now. “Jess, I’m just trying to make you feel good. Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“Not… um. Not now, not with you, or in this sort of place.” Jess was blushing furiously. Why did every man she met fall head over heels for her?
Jaxon looked around at the wilderness they were traversing. There were no paths, the underbrush was knee-high, and they could be attacked at any moment. “I understand. Forgive my lack of forethought. I didn’t mean to detract from the experience by doing this right here. Perhaps later, if we can find a nice clearing.”
Somehow… somehow Jess was blushing! She had never had someone so serious, so invested, in wooing her this suddenly! The way Jaxon spoke, it was passionate and full of intensity. He really wanted her, she could tell. Maybe… perhaps he was just terrible at making small talk? Her thoughts were written on her face, but luckily for her, Jaxon was already walking toward his goal once again. He was grumbling, and she assumed that he was sad that he had been so pushy with her. Too bad for Jess, she was just too far away to hear him mumbling about finding proper lumbar support for a makeshift bed this evening.
“Jasmyn, how is your night vision? The sun is beginning to set, and I think we should find a place to rest before we need to find one.” Jaxon never stopped plodding forward, resigned to moving slowly so his new companion could keep up.
“My night vision is fine, but did you just get my name wrong?” Jessamyn stared at the back of Jaxon’s head, willing him to turn and face her reignited wrath.
The Monk didn’t respond, simply nodding along at whatever he heard her ‘say’. “I see, I see. It must have been terrible for you to be out in the woods so long by yourself!”
“Hey! I’m telling you that I am fine to keep moving at night!” Jess tried to get his attention by being too loud.
“Oh? Thank you for pointing that out.” Jaxon looked back at her. “I wouldn’t have even seen that clearing, good catch!”
“You upset me with your illogic.” Jess resigned herself to one-sided conversations for the foreseeable future.
Jaxon walked into the clearing—brushing against a tree—and was grabbed by Jess and yanked backward as a massive branch slammed into the ground where he had been about to walk. He caught his balance easily; having a raw score of one hundred dexterity wasn’t just for show. Jaxon watched as the branch lifted into the air, vanishing into the foliage above them. “Did you see which tree that was, by chance? I was slightly too distracted to note it.”
“I have a concerning thought.” Jess grimly bent over and grabbed a rock, tossing it against a tree a bit further away. As the small stone bounced off the wood, a branch smashed into the spot it had touched. “It looks like we aren’t allowed to climb trees to seek shelter. It looks like we are going to be forced to stay on the ground and fight whatever is alive in this forest.”
Just then, a songbird alighted on a tree and was whipped with a twig. All that remained was a poof of slowly falling feathers. Jaxon nodded seriously. “I had been wondering why I hadn’t heard any birds in the last hour.”
Chapter Eleven
Jess and Jaxon had decided to keep moving, hoping to find a more defensible location than an open clearing. As the light faded further, their pace began to slow. Jaxon looked over at Jess as she straightened up, the back crackling had caused him to almost begin drooling.
Jess saw him looking at her with a flushed face and got the wrong idea once again. “You seriously aren’t going to be able to focus unless we do this, are you?”
“I… I don’t think I will,” Jaxon admitted, swallowing and inspecting her closely. She blushed a flaming red, looking down and muttering.
“I think you’re pretty cute too, and I guess this is just a game…” She looked up at Jaxon with a sultry expression on her face. “Alright, let’s do this. You need to get your head straight, and it’s been a long time for me, too.”
“Are you sure? Right here in the forest?” Jaxon’s smile had stretched across his face, distorting his expression to an almost inhuman level
.
“You have that bed thing?” Jess’s words were barely out of her mouth when Jaxon was unfurling his chiropractic table and getting ready. She sat down and looked up at him as he came close. “I can’t believe I’m doing this. I never do this sort of thing.”
“That’s okay; I just hope that I get you interested in doing this more often, especially in real life.” Jaxon motioned for her to lay down. “Lay on your front?”
Jess was beet red as she lay down languidly. “I just can’t believe– Gah!”
You have been paralyzed! Time remaining: 10… 9…
“Adjust!” *Crack*! Jaxon efficiently adjusted the lady; properly aligning her head, spine, and limbs for the first time in her character’s life. “Adjust! Adjust! Adjust!”
*Crack*! *Crack*! *Crack*!
Jess’s health dropped by a tenth on the final adjustment. As Jaxon stepped back, the paralysis wore off, and she flipped off the table and flew at Jaxon with her hands stretched into claws. “I’m going to murder you!”
Jaxon easily dodged out of the way and avoided the subsequent attacks. “What in the world are you doing? Why do people keep attacking me after I help them? Oh! I see! You are testing out your new levels of dexterity and strength on someone you can’t really hope to hurt! That’s fine then, but I don’t know if this is the best location or time to do that. The sun is going down.”
Jess didn’t respond, firmly set on tearing chunks of bleeding meat out of this infuriating and confusing man! The most frustrating part? He was right! She couldn’t land a single hit on him. “Stop moving so I can kill you!”
“Why would I do that?” Jaxon was hardly needing to use any effort to avoid her attacks but was starting to realize that she was attacking him in earnest.