by Joe Haldeman
“Mr. Larrin—Marty—is trying to subvert their command structure, the way he did here, through Washington. We have ten mechanics waiting on-line, though not in cages.”
“So they could take control, but not do anything fancy.”
“Walk around, use simple weapons. Maybe all they have to do is make the soldierboys just stand there, or lie down. Anything but attack.”
“Our flyboy and waterboy communications have been cut off, apparently right at this building.” He pointed at the other table. “Lieutenant Phan’s trying to patch through.”
There was another explosion, powerful enough to rattle dishes. “You’d think someone would notice.”
“Well, everybody knows the compound’s isolated for a top-secret simulation exercise. All this commotion could be special training effects.”
“Until they actually vaporize us,” I said.
“If they’d intended to destroy the building, they could have done that in the first second of the engagement.”
Top unplugged. “Shit. Pardon me, sir.” There was a huge crash upstairs. “We’re dead meat. Four soldierboys against ten, we never had a chance.”
“Had?” I said.
Marty unjacked. “They got all four. They’re inside.”
A glossy black soldierboy clomped up to the mess hall door, bristling with weapons. It could kill us all in an instant. I didn’t move a muscle, except for an eyelid twitching uncontrollably.
Its contralto voice was loud enough to hurt the ears. “If you follow orders there is no reason for anyone to be hurt. Everyone with weapons, place them on the floor. Everyone move to the wall opposite me, leaving your hands visible.” I backed up with my hands in the air.
The general stood up a little too fast, and both laser and machine-gun barrels swiveled to target him. “I’m Brigadier General Pagel, the ranking officer here—”
“Yes. Your identity is verified.”
“You know you are going to be court-martialed for this? That you’ll spend the rest of your life—”
“Sir, begging your pardon, but I am under orders to disregard the rank of anyone in this building. My orders come from a major general, who I understand will be here eventually. I respectfully suggest you wait to discuss it with him.”
“So are you going to shoot me if I don’t go to that wall with my hands up?”
“No, sir. I’ll fill the room with vomiting agent and not kill anyone unless they touch a weapon.”
Top turned pale. “Sir . . .”
“All right, Top. I’ve had a sniff of it myself.” The general sulked back to the wall with his hands in his pockets.
Two more soldierboys rolled up behind her, along with a couple of dozen people from other floors, and I heard the faint sound of a cargo helicopter approaching; then a small flyboy. They both landed on the roof and went silent.
“Is that your general?” Pagel said.
“I wouldn’t know, sir.” After a minute a bunch of shoes came in, ten and then another dozen. They were wearing camouflage coveralls with head nets, no insignia or unit markings. That could make you nervous. They stacked their own weapons in the hall outside, and gathered armloads from the floor.
One of them stepped out of his coveralls and tossed away the head covering. He was bald except for a few strands of white hair. He looked kindly in spite of his major general’s uniform.
He stepped up to General Pagel and they exchanged salutes. “I want to speak to Dr. Marty Larrin.”
“General Blaisdell, I presume,” Marty said.
He walked over to him and smiled. “We have to speak, of course.”
“Of course. Maybe we can convert one another.”
He looked around and stared at me. “You’re the black physicist. The murderer.” I nodded. Then he pointed at Amelia. “And Dr. Harding. I want all of you to come with me.”
On his way out, he tapped the first soldierboy. “Come along for my protection,” he said, smiling. “Let’s go talk in Dr. Harding’s office.”
“I don’t really have an office,” she said, “just a room.” She seemed to be straining not to look at me. “Room 241.”
We did have a weapon there. Did she think I could outdraw a soldierboy? Excuse me, general; let me open this drawer and see what I find. Oops, fried Julian.
But it might be the only chance we’d have at him.
The soldierboy was too big for all of us to fit in the freight elevator, so we walked up the stairs. Blaisdell led at a quick pace. Marty got a little winded.
The general was obviously disappointed that room 241 wasn’t full of test tubes and blackboards. He consoled himself with a ginger ale from the cooler.
“I suppose you’re curious about my plan,” he said.
“Not really,” Marty said. “It’s a fantasy. No way you can prevent the inevitable.”
He laughed, quiet amusement rather than a madman’s cackle. “I have JPL.”
“Oh, come on.”
“It’s true. Presidential order. There are no scientists there tonight. Just my loyal troops.”
“All of them Hammer of God?” I asked.
“All the leaders,” he said. “The others are just a cordon, to keep the world of unbelievers away.”
“You seem like a normal person,” Amelia said, lying through her teeth. “Why would you want all this beautiful world to end?”
“You don’t really think I’m normal, Dr. Harding, but you’re wrong. You atheists in your ivory towers, you don’t have any idea how real people feel. How perfect this is.”
“Killing everything,” I said.
“You’re worse than she is. This is not death; it’s rebirth. God has used you scientists as tools, so He can cleanse everything and start over.”
It did make a crazy kind of sense. “You’re nuts,” I said.
The soldierboy swiveled to face me. “Julian,” it said in a deep voice, “I’m Claude.” There was an uncertain tremor to his movements that said he wasn’t in a cage, warmed up, but was operating the soldierboy from a remote jack.
“What’s going on here?” Blaisdell said.
“The transfer algorithm worked,” Marty said. “Your people aren’t in control of the soldierboys. Ours are.”
“I know that’s not possible,” he said. “The safeguards—”
Marty laughed. “That’s right. The safeguards against transfer of control are profoundly complex and powerful. I should know. I put them there.”
Blaisdell looked at the soldierboy. “Soldier. Leave this room.”
“Don’t, Claude,” Marty said. “We may need you.” It stayed put, rocking slightly. “That was a direct order from a major general,” Blaisdell said.
“I know who you are, sir.”
Blaisdell made a leap for the door, surprisingly fast. The soldierboy reached to grab his arm but punched him down instead. He shoved him back into the room.
He stood up slowly and brushed himself off. “So you’re one of these humanized ones.”
“That’s right, sir.”
“You think that gives you the right to disregard orders from your superiors?”
“No, sir. But my orders include assessing your actions, and orders, as those of a man who is mentally ill, and not responsible.”
“I can still have you shot!”
“I suppose you could, sir, if you could find me.”
“Oh, I know where you people are. The mechanics’ cages for this building’s guards are in the basement, in the northeast corner.” He pinched his earring. “Major Lejeune. Come in.” He pinched it again. “Come in.”
“Nothing gets out of this room but static, sir, except on my frequency.”
“Claude,” I said, “why don’t you just go ahead and kill him?”
“You know I can’t do that, Julian.”
“You could kill him to save your own life.”
“Yes, but his threat to find my cage is not realistic. In fact, my body is not there.”
“But look. He�
�s proposing to kill not only you, but everybody else in the world. In the universe.”
“Shut up, sergeant,” Blaisdell snarled.
“You couldn’t have a more clear-cut case of self-defense if he was standing with a gun at your head.”
The soldierboy was silent for a long moment, weapons at its side. The laser came up partway and fell back. “I can’t, Julian. Even though I don’t disagree with you. I can’t kill him in cold blood.”
“Suppose I ask you to leave the room,” I said. “Go stand in the corridor. Could you do that?”
“Of course.” It staggered outside, taking off a piece of the doorjamb with its shoulder.
“Amelia . . . Marty . . . please go out there, too.” I pulled open the top drawer of the bureau. The tumbler pistol had two rounds left. I took it out.
Amelia saw the gun and started to stammer something.
“Just go outside for minute.” Marty put his arm around her and they stepped awkwardly, crabwise, through the door.
Blaisdell stood up straight. “So. I take it you’re not one of them. The humanized.”
“Actually, I’m partway there. At least I understand them.”
“Yet you’d kill a man for his religious beliefs.”
“I’d kill my own dog if it had rabies.” I clicked the safety off.
“What kind of devil are you?”
The aiming laser spot danced on the center of his chest. “I’m finding out.” I squeezed the trigger.
* * *
the soldierboy didn’t interfere when Julian fired and almost literally blew Blaisdell into two pieces. Part of the body knocked over a lamp and the room was in darkness except for the light from the corridor. Julian stood rigid, listening to the wet sounds of the corpse settling.
The soldierboy glided in behind him. “Let me have the gun, Julian.”
“No. It’s of no use to you.”
“I’m afraid for you, old friend. Give me the weapon.”
Julian turned in the half-light. “Oh. I see.” He stuck the pistol in his belt. “Don’t worry, Claude. I’m okay with that.”
“Sure?”
“Sure enough. Pills, maybe. Guns, no.” He walked around the soldierboy and into the hall. “Marty. How many people do we have who aren’t humanized?”
It took Marty a minute to find the composure to answer. “Well, a lot of them are partway. Everyone who’s recovered from surgery is either humanized or hooked up.
“So how many haven’t been operated on? How many people in this building can fight?”
“Maybe twenty-five, thirty. Most over in E Wing. The ones who aren’t under guard downstairs.”
“Let’s go there. Find as many weapons as we can.”
Claude came up behind him. “We had lots of NLIs in the old soldierboys”—the somewhat pacifistic weapons of nonlethal intent—“and some of them must still be intact.”
“Get them, then. Meet us over at E Wing.”
“Let’s take the fire escape,” Amelia said. “We can sneak around to E without going through the lobby.”
“Good. Do we have all the soldierboys?” They started toward the fire escape.
“Four,” Claude said. “But the other six are harmless, immobilized.”
“Do the enemy shoes know yet?”
“Not yet.”
“Well, we can capitalize on that. Where’s Eileen?”
“Down in the mess hall. She’s trying to figure out a way to disarm the shoes without anybody getting hurt.”
“Yeah, good luck.” Julian opened the window and looked out cautiously. Nobody in sight. But then, down the hall, the elevator pinged.
“Everybody look away and cover your ears,” Claude said. When the elevator door opened, he launched a concussion grenade down the hall.
The flash and bang blinded and deafened the shoes who had been sent to check on Blaisdell. They started shooting at random. Claude stepped between the firing and the window. “Better move,” he said unnecessarily. Julian was pushing Amelia through the window in an ungentlemanly way, and Marty was about to crawl over both of them.
They pounded down the metal steps and sprinted toward the ell of E Wing. Claude fired scary bursts that just missed them, alternating machine gun and laser, that chewed up and scorched the ground to their left and right in the darkness.
The people in E Wing had already armed themselves as much as possible—there was a storage room with a rack of six M-31s and a box of grenades—and had improvised a defensive position by piling up mattresses in a shoulder-high semicircle at the end of the main corridor. Their lookout, fortunately, recognized Julian, so when they burst through the front door they weren’t mowed down by the distinctly unhumanized, and completely terrified, group behind the mattresses.
Julian outlined the situation for them. Claude said that two of the soldierboys had gone outside to check on the remains of our original soldierboys, the ones with weapons of nonlethal intent. The current crop of soldierboys were peaceful types, but it’s hard to express your pacifism with grenades and lasers. Tear gas and vomiting agent didn’t kill, but it was less dangerous just to put people to sleep and collect their weapons.
As long as the enemy shoes stayed inside, that was a possibility. Unfortunately, Building 31 wasn’t set up the way the Guadalajara clinic and St. Bart’s were, where you could maneuver people into the right room and push a button and knock them out. But two of the original soldierboys had been carrying crowd-control canisters of Sweet Dreams, which was a combination knockout gas and euphoriant—you put them to sleep and they wake up laughing.
Both of those machines, though, were wreckage strewn along about a hundred meters of beach. The two searchers sorted through the scattered junk pile and did come up with three intact gas canisters. But they were all identical modules; there was no way to tell whether they would make you sleep or cry or puke. With a normal cage hookup, the mechanics could have let out a little gas and smelled it, but they couldn’t smell anything with the remote.
They didn’t have a lot of time to work on the problem, either. Blaisdell had covered his tracks well, so they weren’t getting any long-distance calls from the Pentagon, but there was plenty of curiosity in Portobello itself. For a training exercise, aspects of it were profoundly real; two civilians had been injured by stray rounds. Most of the city was huddled in cellars. Four squad cars of police ringed the entrance to the base, with eight nervous officers hiding behind their cars shouting, in English and Spanish, at a soldierboy guard that didn’t respond. They couldn’t know it was empty.
“Be back in a minute.” The soldierboy controlled by Claude went rigid as its operator rotated to check out the six immobilized ones. When he got to the one at the front gate, he fired a few laser bursts at the tires of the squad cars, which made nice explosions.
He inhabited one in the mess hall for a few minutes while Eileen expedited a solution to the lady-and-the-tiger canister problem. She took three “prisoners” (choosing among officers she didn’t care for) and marched them down to the beach.
It turned out that they did have one each of each variety: one colonel fell asleep blissfully and another was blinded by tears. A general got to practice his projectile vomiting technique.
Claude rotated back to E Wing when Eileen’s soldierboy walked into the mess hall with a gas canister under its arm. “I think we’re almost out of danger,” he said. “Anybody know where we can find a few hundred yards of rope?”
* * *
i did know where some rope was stashed, clothesline in the laundry room, I guess in case all the dryers broke down at the same time. (Thanks to my exalted former position in Building 31, I may have been the only person who knew about the rope, or where you could find three dusty cans of twelve-year-old peanut butter.)
We waited a half hour for fans to blow out the residual Sweet Dreams, and then went into the mess hall to sort through friends and foe, disarming and tying up Blaisdell’s troops. All men, it turned out, all built like fu
llbacks.
There was enough of the Sweet Dreams hanging around to give you a little buzz, relaxing and uninhibiting. We stacked Blaisdell’s commandos in pairs, face to face, assuming and hoping they would wake up in a homophobic panic. (A side effect of Sweet Dreams for males is profound tumescence.)
One of the shoes had a bandolier of tumbler ammunition. I took it outside and sat on the steps, my head clearing as I shoved the rounds into the weapon’s side port. There was a faint glow to the east. The sun was about to rise on a most interesting day. Maybe my last.
Amelia came out and sat down next to me silently. She stroked my arm.
“How are you doing?” I asked.
“I’m not a morning person.” She took my hand and kissed it. “It must be hell on you.”
“I took my pills.” I jammed the last round in and hefted it. “I killed a major general in cold blood. The army’s going to hang me.”
“It was as you told Claude,” she said. “Self-defense. Defending the whole world. The man was the worst kind of traitor imaginable.”
“Save it for the court martial.” She leaned against me, crying softly. I put the gun down and held her. “I don’t know what the hell’s going to happen now. I don’t think Marty does, either.”
A stranger came running toward us, his hands in the air. I picked up the weapon and pointed it in his direction. “This facility is closed to unauthorized personnel.”
He stopped about twenty feet away, his hands still in the air. “Sergeant Billy Reitz, sir, motor pool. What on earth is going on?”
“How did you get in here?”
“I just ran by the soldierboy; nothing happened. What is all this craziness?”
“As I said—”
“I don’t mean in there!” He gestured wildly. “I mean out here!”
Amelia and I looked out past the compound’s fence. In the dim dawn light stood thousands of silent people, stark naked.
* * *
the fewer than twenty individuals who comprised the Twenty were able to solve interesting and subtle problems with their combined experience and intelligence. They’d had this enhanced ability from the first instant they were humanized.