by Nicky James
There was one thing still on my agenda—a boundary we had yet to cross. The longer this went on, the more I wanted it. I remembered with explicit clarity how amazing Denver had looked getting fucked into oblivion by the blond at Ramon’s party. The way he’d screamed and writhed. He was vocal when he got into the right headspace, and I wanted to take him there again.
I wanted that for myself.
I wanted to be the one juicing those noises from him and making him scream with pleasure as he came.
Although he’d been on board with our little secret rendezvous, from time to time, he was still nervous and reticent. I knew if I initiated more, he might buck me or overthink or run away scared. Blowjobs were one thing. Letting me fuck him would lead to a whole other level of freaking out for Denver.
He didn’t voice his concerns about what we were doing anymore. The few worries that remained weren’t about what we were doing, per se; they were about getting caught.
Friday morning between classes, Corey and I made our way to the popular café in the college food court. We bought sugary, caffeinated drinks with stupid names that took far too long for the barista to make and found a table to enjoy them.
Neither of us was awake enough, and the quiet between us was comfortable. It wasn’t until we’d been sitting a while and the caffeine had a chance to kick in that Corey spoke. “Are you going to Leroy’s tonight?”
“What’s happening at Leroy’s?”
“Party, man. Not like Ramon’s, but whatever. Just the lame-ass kind, but it’s still fun, right? Get drunk. Maybe you can find a hot piece of ass, or whatever, to fuck. There’s always a willing participant, right?”
“Yeah. Cool. Party sounds good.”
I’d have to drag Denver out with us. If I didn’t encourage him to have fun from time to time, he hid in his dorm room and studied his weekends away. Denver was socially crippled, and unless he had someone guiding him and holding his hand, he didn’t know how to go about having fun in life.
“Mind if I invite Den?”
“I don’t care. Your brother’s a little square, you know that, right?”
I shrugged. “He’s okay once he’s had a few drinks.”
“Whatever.” Corey grew more alert, dragging himself upright in his seat. “Did I tell you about Alicia?”
“Who?”
Corey dragged his drink in front of him and took the lid off so he could sip it. “Alicia, dude. For real?”
“Who’s that?”
“Christ, Har, seriously? The girl I’m dating. The one I’ve been dating for a few weeks now. I talk about her all the time. Pay attention.”
“Oh, right. What’s wrong?”
“Remember your annoying one-night stand who didn’t understand the concept of a one-night stand? Shianne?”
“Oh god. Don’t remind me. I finally got rid of her. Haven’t heard from her in over a week. Knock on fucking wood.” I rapped the table for emphasis.
“Yeah, well, she and Alicia are friends, apparently. I didn’t know until, like, two days ago when we were hanging out, and Shianne showed up at Alicia’s room. Anyhow, we were talking about Leroy’s party this weekend, and I said I’d invite you. Dude, your name slipped out, and I wasn’t even thinking.”
I groaned. “Fuck me. Is she gonna start calling me again?” I dropped my face into my hands and scrubbed.
“I’m not so sure. Shit hit the fan, and Shianne told Alicia all about how you made her think you were into her and wanted to date her, but the minute she ‘gave herself’ to you’”—he put air quotes around the words—“you ran for the hills. Now, I’ve been listening to Alicia say all this shit about ‘How can I be friends with a player?’ and whatnot. You’re deplorable, FYI. Her words, not mine.”
“It was practically a month ago, for fuck’s sake. Tell her to get a grip. It’s none of her business.”
“I know! That’s what I said.” Corey shook his head. “Whatever, man. I don’t care, but next time you want to fuck and run, make it clear to the person so there isn’t any misunderstanding. Dude, you have to read between the lines. Some people don’t get it.”
“Believe me, it’s been well noted.”
“So, you gonna be there tonight?”
“I’ll be there. Gonna need something to purge this day from my mind. On that note…” I checked the time. “We should go, or we’ll be late for O’Hagan’s class.”
* * *
I pounded a fist on my brother’s dorm room door. “It’s the police,” I said in a gruff, authoritative voice. I pinched my lips, fighting back a smile as I listened to scrambling and panic from within.
The door flew open a second later, and Denver’s roommate, Chris, blinked back at me until he realized I was fucking around.
“You’re an asshole.”
“At your service. Den,” I called, shoving past Chris and letting myself in. “Get dressed. We’re going to a party.”
Denver was at his desk, computer on, books occupying all the remaining space. This was what I was talking about. It was Friday night, and he was neck-deep in homework.
“What are you doing here?”
“I just said. Party, man. Come on.” I tugged open a dresser drawer and rooted around until I found a nice shirt, then I threw it at him. “Put this on.”
He caught it with a frown as I found him jeans as well.
“Party where?” Chris asked, falling onto his bed.
“You’re not invited.”
I tossed a pair of jeans at Denver and pointed at the bathroom. “Shower. Go. Now.”
“But I was—” Denver pointed at his computer.
“Ah-ah-ah… Stop. Do you want to do homework on a Friday or go drinking? Think hard about this.”
He glanced at his work and back. “Drinking. Definitely drinking.”
“See? That-a-boy. It’s Friday. You can finish your school crap tomorrow.”
“Why can’t I go with you guys?” Chris asked again.
“Because I said so.”
Chris grumbled under his breath and put his headphones on, ignoring me.
Denver still hadn’t moved, so I pulled out my shit-stirrer grin and lowered my voice. “Do you need me to help you?”
Denver flashed his eyes at his roommate. “I’m going.”
While he cleaned up, I dropped onto his bed and found a comic book to read while I waited.
“Are you gonna be home all night?” I asked Chris when he abandoned his headphones.
“Not sure. Probably. Nowhere to go.”
Noted. I should have asked Tate what his plans were. The hardest part of this secret arrangement with Denver was finding privacy. It wasn’t as simple as slipping into an available room at a party. We had to be more discreet than usual.
We arrived at Leroy’s room at just after eleven. The music was loud, and there were tons of people present from all different programs. Unlike our venture to Ramon’s party in the country, Leroy had taken over the upper level of his dorm building with his neighboring students’ permission. People mingled around in various rooms and hung out in the hallway, drinking, dancing, and having good old-fashioned fun.
As was typical when I brought Denver to parties, he remained glued to my side until he’d had enough alcohol to remove his inhibitions, allowing him to feel braver mingling on his own. When he vanished an hour after we arrived, I couldn’t help the surge of discomfort that followed.
It wasn’t like me to give a shit what my brother got up to at a party. I was the first one to promote his freedom and encourage him to sow his wild oats however he saw fit.
That night, I couldn’t fight the urge to keep him in my sights. Whenever he spoke with a guy who I thought was being a little too friendly, my spine stiffened, and the urge to plow my way into their conversation and break up whatever was happening was strong.
It was me who’d said that what we shared in secret was merely sexual. It couldn’t be anything else. Making an exclusive deal with my brother was insane on so m
any levels. From day one, I was certain it would be Denver taking issue with that rule, not me.
Yet, I couldn’t relax and have fun to save my life because Denver was drunk. And when Denver got drunk, he got flirty. When Denver got flirty, he ended up in a basement getting fucked six ways from Sunday by a blond who made him scream until his voice broke.
And now my dick was hard. Fuck.
“Why are you scowling?” I jerked my focus from my brother to Corey who’d snuck up beside me.
“I’m not.”
“You are so. Is Denver pissing you off?”
I flicked my gaze to my brother and the cute redhead who’d become his sole focus. “No.”
“He looks pleasantly occupied.” Corey smacked my shoulder.
I glanced around. “Where’s Alicia? I thought she was coming.”
“She’s mingling.”
I took a swig from my beer and scanned the people surrounding us. This was the first time I’d been to a party and not had fun. It was pathetic.
“I need another beer,” I announced.
Corey followed me as I headed to the ice chest Denver and I had brought. I dug out a can and popped the tab, letting the first icy cold mouthful coat my stomach, wishing it would wash away my sour mood.
“Hey, baby, look who I found—Oh, hey, Harley.” Alicia bounced up beside Corey and stalled.
A half a second later, Shianne appeared by her side.
When I expected to get ragged on for being a dick and not returning her endless calls, she pouted her lower lip and blinked her long lashes instead. “Hey, Harley.”
Right, so this wasn’t awkward at all. Shianne was cute, but she was clingy and needy, and the last thing I wanted was to have her chasing me all around again, unable to shake her off. She was a good fuck, but I wouldn’t be dipping my toe into that pond again.
“Hey.” Was I supposed to apologize for not getting back to her?
“Wanna hang out?” Shianne asked.
No, not on your fucking life!
“I, ah … have to check on Denver.”
Her sad, puppy-dog gaze followed me as I shoved through the crowd in search of my brother.
I found him with the redhead. The guy had Denver pinned to the wall and was kissing him to within an inch of his life. A burning hot rage ignited in my core as I barreled toward them.
I tore the redhead off and pinned my brother with venom.
“Take a walk, buddy,” I told the redhead.
“What the fuck?!”
I halted his protest with a looked that could have melted iron, and he backed off, hands up. “Whatever. Fuck you, asshole. I’m out.”
The minute the guy was gone, Denver punched my shoulder. “What the hell was that?”
“Change of rules. This”—I gestured at where the guy had disappeared—“isn’t happening.”
Denver scowled and darted his gaze around the crowded hallway before leaning close and hissing. “What are you talking about? You said—”
“I was wrong.”
“Wrong? You explicitly told me—”
Denver yelped when I grabbed him by his shirt collar and pulled him down the hallway to the stairwell. I snagged our ice chest on the way by and dodged Shianne, who’d been waiting for me.
“Hey, Harley, I was wondering—”
“Not now!” I snapped, shutting her up.
“Call me?”
I didn’t release Denver during the three-flight descent. He stumbled and held the railing for dear life, knocking into me once and protesting the whole way. Outside, I veered around the corner and headed down a vacant side street until I was sure no one was around. Then I slammed Denver against the wall of one of the surrounding buildings and kissed him. It was bruising and possessive and hungry.
He swallowed all his protests and clung to me, kissing me back and tugging me closer.
The ice chest landed on the ground with a clatter, but I didn’t give a fuck. This was what I wanted and needed. I took his face in my hands and gave him all I had.
I growled into the kiss, then tore my lips from his mouth, peering deep into his stunning hazel eyes. “I know I said it was casual and something to bridge the gap. I know I said we could get each other off and leave it at that, maybe have relationships with other people on the side, but I was wrong. Seeing that guy with his tongue down your throat made me realize I don’t want to share you.”
“Fine. I’m one hundred percent on board with that, but it goes both ways,” he panted, stealing another kiss and biting my lip.
“Fucking right it does.”
“You know this is beyond messed up, right?”
“Don’t care.” Another long kiss.
“You know this can’t last, right?” Denver was still breaking down logistics even though his body was well ahead of his mind.
“Says who?”
“Says reality. Life will eventually interfere. It’s inevitable. We can’t hide this forever, and we can’t sustain this kind of secret.”
I couldn’t get enough of his mouth.
“Then we take advantage of it while we can. I want you, only you, and I’ll hold you for as long as possible.”
I found his cock and massaged him through his jeans. He was hard and ready. If I could have safely dropped to my knees right there in the dark street and sucked him off, I would have, but it was too risky.
“I need you, Den,” I rasped against his ear. “Don’t say no. Tell me you want it too.”
“One of us is going to get hurt. This is going to end so badly, I know it.”
“It won’t. I promise you.”
“You can’t make those promises. You don’t know.”
“Denver?” I found his mouth again and sucked his tongue, bit his lip, and made him squirm as I rubbed him through his pants. “Live in the moment with me for a change. Let’s worry about tomorrow when it gets here.”
He gasped and thrust against my hand. “You’re right. God, I want you. Your place. Chris never leaves.”
“Tate might be there.”
“You go first and check. If he’s home, kick him out. Tell him you want to get laid, and he’s in the way. Then we’ll barricade the door.”
“Then will you let me fuck you?”
Denver’s lust-drunk vision cleared as he studied my face, a million questions surfacing. “You mean—”
“I want to fuck you, Den. I want to own and claim your ass so badly. You have no idea. I wanna know what it’s like to bury myself balls deep and make you beg for it. I want to make you scream like that blond did at Ramon’s party.”
Denver shuddered. “Jesus, that’s hot.”
“Will you let me?”
“Let’s go.”
He gathered the ice chest and snagged my hand, dragging me across campus toward my building. We couldn’t get there fast enough.
Tate wasn’t home. I dragged my dresser across the room, blocking the door. If he came back too soon, at least he wouldn’t get an eyeful before we got warning he was there. So long as he didn’t see Denver, I could be fucking anyone.
Denver stripped the minute the dresser was in place, tossing his clothes on the ground as he made his way to my bed. With a few beers in his system, he struggled less with self-consciousness and doubt. He was eager, and his eyes lit up with expectation.
I was right behind him.
We’d moved past his initial reservations, so it was easy to fall into a heavy make-out session that included wandering hands and grinding cocks. The moment heated up in no time. When I had Denver on his back, I took him down my throat and sucked him for a while, ensuring he was on edge.
His cries filled the room as he squirmed and arched his back, fisted my hair with a death grip, and plunged into my mouth over and over.
“Find me the lube. That drawer.” I gestured without moving from between his legs.
He tossed it to me, and I coated a few fingers. I worked him open as he held his legs back.
“Holy shit, I can’t
believe this is happening,” Denver said.
“You won’t regret it. I swear it.”
When he was good and loose, I donned a rain jacket and got into position.
“Gonna fuck you so good. You ready?”
Denver bit his lip and nodded. There was anticipation and eagerness behind his eyes.
I clung to that look and lined up, edging myself in before he could overthink.
Fully seated, I grinned at Denver, who shook his head and let out a breathless laugh. “You should see the look on your face,” he rasped. “You’d think you’d conquered the world, not my ass.”
“I feel like I have. You feel amazing. You ready?”
“I like it fast and hard.”
“I remember.”
Denver nodded, and it was game over.
I fucked him like he wanted, the bed slamming against the wall with our rhythm. He closed his eyes and threw his head back, panting and moaning and begging for more. It was frantic. When Denver reached for me and dragged me down, his nails cut into my skin.
He mashed our mouths together, and the kiss that followed was delicious chaos. It was sweaty and erratic and out of this world.
My orgasm hit without warning. I pounded my brother’s ass mercilessly, screaming my release as it pulsed through me again and again and again like it might go on forever.
Denver jerked himself, and within a few deep, well-angled thrusts, he came too. It was just how I remembered. His cries of pleasure filled my ears and sank deep into my bones. I’d done that to him. It had been me this time.
We collapsed side by side as we caught our breaths.
“So,” Denver said after a few silent minutes where I’d been pondering life and what this thing between us meant. “You want monogamy now? My brother? My brother, who never wants to stick with one person, wants to be exclusive with me?”
“Don’t make it into a thing.”
“It is a thing. It’s a huge thing.” When I didn’t respond, he continued. “It won’t work.”
“Then we ride the wave as long as we can.”
“Will this mess up our friendship? I don’t want to lose my brother.”
“I think lines have been crossed we can’t take back, Den. Too late.”
He sighed. “Swear to me, even if this has to stop, that we will always be friends.”