Impassioned: A Salvation Society Novel

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Impassioned: A Salvation Society Novel Page 11

by Lea Coll


  She was the opposite of what I thought I wanted, but what if she was exactly what I needed? Not just for Everett, but for me?

  The tingle which had been present in my body since I’d seen her text earlier today drifted down my spine, lighting up every single nerve ending.

  “You can do this, Mason. I have faith in you. Let me know how it goes.”

  She believed in me. I needed to handle Everett. Then I’d think about Mia. Did I continue to enjoy her presence in my life, or did I want something else? Was I even ready for anything else?

  “Thank you for everything. For being there for us.”

  “You’re welcome.” She was quiet for a few seconds. I was in no rush to get off the phone to deal with Everett. “I wasn’t sure it would be a good idea for me to be in the meeting this morning.”

  I liked her there. She anchored me in that room, pushing me to be a better dad.

  “It’s not good for the relationship I’ve built with Everett. I don’t want him to lose whatever trust we’ve established.”

  “I don’t think you did. If anything, you helped.” Everett responded to her in the meeting. He was comforted by her presence as much as I was.

  “Good. As long as I didn’t make things worse. I need this job, but at the end of the day, the kids come first. Whatever they need.”

  I wanted to say she was amazing, but I’d already said that. Maybe with her, it was better if I showed her what she deserved rather than talk about it.

  “Go talk to Everett, then let me know how it goes.”

  The promise of talking to her later buoyed me. “Yeah, okay. Talk to you later.”

  I got out of my truck, grabbed the mail, heading inside. I toed off my boots, leaving them by the door. “Everett. Turn the TV off. Time for dinner.”

  The TV sound turned off. Everett slowly made his way into the kitchen. “What’s for dinner?”

  “Good question. What should we make?”

  His eyes darted around the room before landing on mine. “I can’t cook.”

  “Well, it’s about time you learn. If you don’t want to be involved in sports, then you’ll need to help with dinner.”

  Everett’s mouth dropped open. “That sucks. No other kid has to do that.”

  “I don’t care, honestly.” I pulled open the freezer, grabbing beef.

  I placed the meat on a plate before putting it in the microwave to defrost. “Get onions from the fridge.”

  Placing a cutting board and knife on the island, I waited for him to get the onion. “You can dice the onion while I get the spices ready.

  “I don’t know how to cut an onion.”

  It didn’t surprise me. My parents wouldn’t take the time to show him. Rebecca tended to spoil him, not giving him chores or expectations. I showed him what to do, keeping an eye on him while I grabbed the garlic, Worcestershire sauce, and bowl. I showed him how to mix the ingredients, forming patties.

  “You can put cheese on when they’re almost done cooking.”

  Everett nodded, listening with rapt attention.

  Maybe there was hope for this kid after all. Keep him too busy for after school trouble.

  When the first few patties were cooking on the stove, I said, “Principal Bryant called this afternoon, said he hadn’t made any progress in determining who the bullies were.”

  Everett sat on a stool at the island. “It’s not fair that I’m suspended.”

  I braced my hands on the counter, looking at him. “How’s that? You were caught on camera destroying school property.”

  “I only did it because the other guys wanted me to.”

  “You had a choice. You could have come to me or one of your teachers.”

  Everett was quiet but his face was sour.

  Mia’s words ran through my head. Be patient. Let him talk to me. I wanted to be the person he relied on. The one he came to when he had problems at school. “You’re not going to tell me who was involved?”

  He remained silent.

  The frustration built in my chest, threatening to bubble over. “You’re going to protect them?”

  His jaw tightened as he turned his face away from me.

  I checked the hamburger patties. “Set the table.”

  I watched him as he got the plates, ketchup, buns, placing them on the table.

  We ate in silence. My only satisfaction was that he’d helped make dinner. I’d taught him to cut onions, make the hamburger patties. It was something.

  The frustration was still there. He was either protecting them or planning to stay away from them. “No video games for a month.”

  His face screwed up in disgust but to his credit, he didn’t complain.

  When I was home, I intended to be present. Everett wouldn’t be able to hide behind his games. I’d plan things to do on the weekend, hiking, fishing. All of the things I wished my dad had done with me.

  When Everett was in his room for the night, I settled on my bed, pulling out my phone. I’d looked forward to talking to Mia all night, but what would I say? I’d screwed up with Everett. He didn’t trust me enough to talk to me because I’d never been there for him. Maybe it was too little too late. My phone buzzed with an incoming video call from Mia.

  Checking my outfit of white T-shirt and sweats, I hit accept.

  Mia wore a tank top with thin straps, her hair was in a messy bun on top of her head with Stark curled up next to her on the couch. She looked exactly how I pictured her earlier when we were on the phone.

  She smiled. “Hey.”

  I liked seeing her like this, casual and relaxed. “I rate a video call now?”

  “What can I say? You’re special.” Mia’s smile never faltered, but a faint pink tinged her cheeks.

  “Huh.” She was blushing. Fuck. Was I flirting? I don’t think I’d ever made a girl blush. I never dated the kind of girl who blushed. The ones I dated were confident, knowing exactly what they wanted from a guy like me. Mia didn’t want anything. She was teasing me, but the idea that she thought I was special settled deep inside.

  She looked away from the camera before turning back to me. “I just wanted to check in. See how you two were doing.”

  Was it weird that I filled in, See how my boys were doing, in my head? That was definitely weird. She was my son’s counselor. I shouldn’t be wondering if she wore a bra under her tank. I flexed my fingers, wanting to clear my mind of dirty thoughts.

  “Did he talk to you?” Mia prompted.

  I hated admitting I’d failed, but she’d said my first attempt probably wouldn’t be successful. “I tried doing what you said, but he said the punishment was unfair since he wasn’t the only one involved. He wouldn’t name the others. I taught him how to make hamburgers, so there’s that.”

  “That’s great, Mason. Have you been teaching him to cook?” She smiled, leaning toward the camera.

  I averted my gaze from the swell of her breasts under her tank top, focusing on her praise. “It’s something I started today. I thought it’s something we could do together in the evenings, giving us an opportunity to talk.”

  “He learns a life skill at the same time. Well done.”

  Well done. Those two words hit me in my chest. What would it have been like if my dad had told me that after one of my games? What if my mother had praised me instead of criticized me? What if my parents took me fishing or taught me to cook in an effort to connect with me? Instead, they shipped me off to military school when I was too much.

  They didn’t bother asking me why. Not that I even understood at the time. Looking back, it was probably to get their attention. I succeeded. I finally looked at Mia, whose eyes were filled with concern for me.

  “Keep doing what you’re doing. You’re doing the right thing. I can’t promise he’ll ever be one-hundred-percent honest with you, but you’re building something with him that should cause him to think twice before he does something like this again.”

  Despite her encouragement, I had this sinking sensati
on in my stomach. “I have a bad feeling it’s not over. That he’s gearing up to do more stupid shit.”

  Mia’s eyes widened. “He probably will.”

  I shook my head. “I’m sorry. I’m not used to watching my mouth.”

  “I get it. It’s okay. I try not to swear because otherwise I’ll do it at school, which is a big no-no.”

  “You’re cute.” I almost cringed at my words. She sounded like a schoolteacher. She was cute, but I shouldn’t be telling her that. It crossed the line between us. One that maybe had been crossed when she brought Everett to the airport to see me.

  Her smile turned sad. “I get that a lot. Guys always say I’m cute.”

  I didn’t want to be like other guys. I wanted her to feel special. I didn’t want to tell her the truth, that she was giving me all kinds of teacher fantasies I shouldn’t be having. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. You sound like a teacher.”

  “I can’t help it.”

  We fell into a comfortable silence. She’d gotten her update on Everett, but I wanted to keep talking to her, but about what? Our common denominator was Everett.

  I wanted to spend more time with her. We’d eaten breakfast together the other day, maybe she’d be open to dinner. “Would you like to eat dinner with us?”

  She looked uncertain.

  Was she not feeling the same way I did? If I told her it was for Everett maybe she’d be more comfortable. “You could tell me if I’m doing something wrong.”

  Her face softened. “Of course. Although, I have to say this isn’t something I normally do.”

  “You don’t go to dinner with every single dad?” I smiled, but my mind was reeling with the idea of her dating someone else.

  “No. Never, actually. I get involved with the students, but not the parents. It’s something—”

  A shadow crossed her face and I wanted to know why. There had to be more of a reason than the appearance of impropriety. “Why not?”

  She sighed. “I told you before, I’ve gotten into trouble for being too involved.”

  “We don’t have to if you think it will be an issue with your job.” I thought for a minute how to make it a safe option for her. “You can bring Stark with you and I’ll call it a thank you dinner for watching him.”

  She bit her lip, clearly struggling with the decision. “Okay. I’ll come.”

  A surge of happiness spread through my body. “How about—” I almost said this Saturday, but I didn’t want to invite her while I lived with my parents. She didn’t need to hear their vitriol. “Once I move into the new place.”

  She slapped a hand over her chest. “Oh. That’s perfect. I can bring a housewarming gift.”

  “Mia, you don’t need to do that.” I suspected she went above and beyond with everyone, not just me. Remembering how she was helping a friend move the other day, all of the events she attended in the photos she placed on social media, she was probably the kind of person who arranged parties, get-togethers, and always remembered the hostess gift.

  “I want to. Is there anything you need?” Her eyes were bright with excitement.

  “We have a few pieces of furniture in storage, but I need to get Everett a bedroom set. I need kitchen supplies.” I hadn’t replaced anything because I knew we’d be living with my parents and we could use their stuff.

  “Great. I have to go—” Her eyes sparkled. She was probably shopping in her head already.

  I should be myself. I should tell her that I didn’t want the perfect kitchen or house. That her gift was unwelcome. But looking at the light I’d brought to her face after discussing her job, I couldn’t. I wasn’t going to be the one to put out her fire.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Mason

  The last two weeks in my parents’ house were uneventful. I was cautiously optimistic that the worst was behind us. Satisfaction filled me with each meal I taught him to prepare. I could do basic stuff. I wasn’t a great cook, but it was a skill he needed to know. I’d missed out on teaching him the usual things, like how to ride a bike because Rebecca was there for the day-to-day things.

  Watching him eat breakfast in our new home, I vowed not to miss anything else. Last weekend, we’d gone fishing. He was reluctant. I wondered if it was because I hadn’t started these activities with him when he was younger.

  I’d invited Mia over tonight. I looked around, trying to see the house through her eyes. I had my bed, a kitchen table, and a couch we’d moved from storage, but otherwise, it was barren. I wanted Everett to pick new bedroom furniture since he was getting older.

  I’d never leased a home before, always staying in base housing with each move. Everett put pictures of Rebecca and him and the earlier pictures of all three of us in the living room, but the walls were devoid of anything else. How would I make this place a home?

  I’d already purchased cooking utensils, a few plates, and silverware since meals were important to us. I’d planned to grill out this evening so I could focus on Mia.

  “You want to go shopping today?” I don’t think those words had ever left my mouth.

  Everett raised his brow but didn’t respond.

  “You need stuff for your room.” Maybe I’d get an idea of who he was based on his choices. I’d been quiet during most of our activities, hoping he’d talk, but he only spoke if I asked him a question.

  “Can I paint my room black?”

  I hesitated, my coffee mug halfway to my mouth. This felt like a test. “It can be whatever color you want if you paint it yourself. When we move out, we have to paint it white.”

  I hope this wasn’t a mistake. I didn’t know how I felt about skulls on the wall.

  Everett’s eyes widened in surprise. “Really?”

  I was calling his bluff, because for the most part, he seemed lazy. Reluctant to do the chores I’d outlined for him each day—washing his own laundry, putting dishes away, and keeping his room clean.

  The last one seemed unlikely. Maybe if he liked his room, he’d take pride in keeping it clean. Mia sent me some articles on raising teenagers, some of the advice seemed doable, others not so much.

  “Come on. There’s a home store about an hour from here. We can walk around and get whatever we need.” I could get more furniture, glasses, maybe some pillows for the couch. When Mia arrived, maybe she wouldn’t think we lived in a bachelor pad.

  “Fine.” He stood, placing his bowl in the dishwasher.

  I wanted to pump my fist because it was the first time I hadn’t had to remind him, but I didn’t because he’d roll his eyes at my less than cool behavior.

  “Take a quick shower and we’ll go.”

  “I don’t need one.”

  “Trust me. You do. Let’s just make it a habit to shower daily.” If I let it go, he’d be happy to wallow in his own filth.

  “Just do it so we can go.”

  “Is Mia coming tonight?”

  “She is.” I waited a beat to see if he reacted. When his face relaxed, I continued, “Do you mind if we hang out with her?”

  “No. She’s cool.” He jogged up the stairs. I heard a door shut and the water turn on.

  That was it. She’s cool. What did that mean? She’s cool as my counselor who also hangs out as a friend after school or she’s cool as a person? One that could fit into our lives.

  I wanted it to be the latter.

  We spent the day wandering the store. I expected it to be painful, but it wasn’t. Everett seemed to be happy picking out things for his room, even the house. I even sent Mia a pic with him next to the bedroom set he’d picked out. He was so into it; I couldn’t say no to whatever he asked for. Thankfully, there were no skulls on the sheets here for him to choose.

  He’d gone with a basic green and blue combo for his room. Blue storage closet, a gray desk, and a gray bed. I let him have a queen since he was getting older. We also got glasses, plates, throw pillows, sheets, and towels. All new things for our new home, our new life together.

  The only mem
ory of Rebecca in our house was the pictures Everett put up.

  If Everett was upset his mother wasn’t with us, he didn’t say. I sometimes wondered if I should ask him how he felt, but then Mia’s words reminded me to be patient—to see if he’d open up to me.

  The last few days I’d allowed my parents to be a guide. Had they taken me fishing or shopping as a kid? No. Did I want them to? At some point, I did until I stopped caring. The key was to get to Everett before he checked out and it was too late.

  Times like this, I was almost grateful to Rebecca for leaving us. She needed to step back so I could step up. It shouldn’t have been that way, but it was. If I ever had another child, I wouldn’t miss a single moment.

  Mia’s image popped in my head the same time as her text.

  Mia: Looks like fun!

  I almost wished she was here, but I needed to do things on my own with Everett.

  We put the small items and his closet in my truck, but had his bed shipped. He’d have to sleep on the air mattress for a few more nights.

  Glancing at the clock, we had a couple of hours when we got home to spruce up the house and get ready. I’d planned a simple meal of steaks, potatoes, and veggies on the grill.

  “Mia’s still coming, right?”

  Pleased Everett was looking forward to seeing Mia, I said, “She is. Can you set up things in your room? We’ll have to put the desk together another day.”

  That was something we could do together even if he was sullen, not speaking a word to me the entire time.

  When we pulled into the driveway of our home, I took note of the neglected yard, made a plan to head to a landscaping store in the spring to spruce things up. Another project Everett could help with.

  We unloaded our purchases, Everett disappearing into his room supposedly to unpack his stuff.

  I placed a basket with a blanket and throw pillows in the living room, hoping that would make it homey. We’d purchased a few knickknacks I placed on the mantle of the fireplace. Then I took a quick shower before coming back downstairs to prepare dinner. I had the steaks and potatoes on serving dishes ready for the grill when the doorbell rang.

 

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