Chapter 23: Pilar
“What?” asks Peter, baffled and upset.
“You’re staying here, Peter,” I say. A pin dropping would be able to be heard—the room is so quiet. Royce stares intently at me with surprise.
“I can’t believe you’re doing this to me.”
“Peter—”
“I’d expect this behavior from him,” Peter sneers as he points at Royce, “but not from you.”
“Peter, you can’t take this personally.”
His watery eyes sit on me. “Then how should I take it?” he mumbles quietly. “You sided with him.” Royce grimaces and crosses his arms in front of himself but to my relief, he doesn’t say anything. He’s letting me handle this.
“This mission is not about Royce. It’s not about you. It’s most definitely not about the Supernova. Now I understand that it’s about something much bigger.”
“What are you talking about?”
“We shouldn’t be in this for how powerful our going against the one-world government makes us feel. We’re in the resistance for freedom—to be able to decide our own destiny.”
It may be my imagination but out of the corner of my eye, I think I see a smile on Royce’s lips.
“But that’s why I’m risking my life along with you and Royce—for freedom.”
“Peter, do you care about the disenfranchised in this United World order?”
“Of course I do.”
“Do you care about making our planet a better place for the majority instead of for only the few?”
Peter nods energetically. “Of course.”
“How much do you believe in the resistance?”
“More than you and Royce give me credit for.”
I eye him carefully. “Okay, if you feel so strongly about our world, then there is no other alternative but for you to stay here while Royce and I continue the mission.”
“Hey, wait a minute! I—”
“Peter, is it or is it not true that you’ll be out of commission for at least a few days?” I question, my voice taking on a steely undertone.
“Maybe a day or so.”
“No, Peter, it’ll be a lot longer than that—and you know it.”
“But—“
“Let’s not fool ourselves,” I chide.
“Okay, maybe it’ll be a few days,” he admits grudgingly, “but so what? It’s better if you two wait for me instead of running off by yourselves.”
“Peter!” I snap. “It’s not like Royce and I are going off to a fun-filled vacation.”
“No, but—”
“Time is running out. Each day that passes becomes more and more dangerous for us.”
“You’re better off with me going with you,” Peter insists.
“What if we risk it and wait for you but things take a bad turn? What if your leg doesn’t heal like it should and you can’t be on the run? What do we do then?”
“I’m sure I can—”
“Peter, understand that we’ve got to go and can’t wait for you.”
“You can wait! You just won’t do it!”
“Peter—”
“It’s just not fair!”
“Life isn’t fair. Just ask anyone in this room,” I retort, waving my hand at all the struggling people in Meggy’s shack.
“Your loyalties are so messed up, Nova!”
I let out an exasperated breath. “You are being so selfish in asking us to wait for you,” I blurt angrily.
“Nova,” he mutters, hurt, “I can’t believe you said that to me.”
“Well, believe it.”
“It’s not my fault I accidentally fell through a bear trap! It’s not my fault I’m in so much pain. It’s not my fault—”
“It’s all your fault!” I growl loudly.
All eyes in the room widen. A smirk forms on Pilar’s lips.
“My fault?” Peter chokes out.
“Yes, your fault,” I assert, deciding that I’m tired of sugarcoating things.
Peter’s hurt eyes delve deeply into my frustrated ones. “How can you say that to me?”
“All you’ve done since we started on this mission is buck whatever Royce tells you to do.”
“But—”
“And he’s been right about everything.”
Royce takes a step back in astonishment, but I have to give credit where credit is due.
“Not everything,” Peter retorts.
“Yes, everything. And you’ve gotten us into lots of trouble because of it. You almost got me killed.”
“Nova, I didn’t mean to—”
“Yes, yes,” I mumble impatiently, “I know you didn’t mean to almost get me munched on by a bear, but it seems you don’t learn from your mistakes. You still ran off into the woods last night without considering that soldiers were out there and could catch you—maybe even have you lead them to us and it wouldn’t just be us who would be in trouble but all these good people too. Did you think about that?”
Peter shakes his head forlornly. “No.”
“I didn’t think so. Now, tell me again how much you care about this mission—how much you care about others.”
He stares solemnly into space. I, however, feel better at letting loose what was eating at me.
“When do we leave?” I ask Royce.
He seems to be looking at me with different eyes. “First we have to make sure that the training exercises are over.”
Pilar rushes to the door. “I’ve got this,” she states.
“Thanks,” Royce tells her.
“Anything for the Supernova,” Pilar announces, smiling at me as she steps out the door.
Once it was ascertained that there were no soldiers in the woods close to the shacks, Royce and I sit outside eating our breakfast of fried bear meat and also fresh eggs from the chickens clucking around Meggy’s home. We eat quietly and solemnly, waiting for Pilar to come back and give us what we hope to be good news.
In deep thought, I realize I don’t want to wait days to leave here. In the first place, time is critical and in the second, if I am truthful with myself, I don’t want to give Peter a chance to heal. I don’t want him with us. He’s dangerous to our mission just like Pilar had said. It’s taken me a while to come to terms with it but I have.
“You know,” Royce says, breaking the silence, “I was surprised to hear you admit to being the Supernova.”
“What?”
“When you made Peter listen to you.”
I chuckle lightly. “I was just trying to get him to stop arguing.”
“You should be proud to be the Supernova, Madrigal.” We’re alone, so he feels free to use my real name.
“I still have my doubts about it.”
His dark eyes anchor themselves to mine. “You shouldn’t. You’re her.”
“How can you be sure?”
“I just am.”
“But—”
“I’m not the only one who is sure,” he expresses. “Just ask Meggy.”
“It may be wishful thinking on her part.”
“She dreamt about you.”
“She thinks she did anyway,” I state.
He shakes his head. “You are so stubborn.”
“Royce, do you really want me to pay attention to a dream?”
“What’s wrong with dreams?—especially prophetic ones?”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Why not?” he asks calmly.
“You’re too down to earth to believe in such things.”
“What?”
“You’re too logical, too unemotional, and too deliberate with everything.”
“You make me sound like a robot.”
“I didn’t mean to make you sound like that but you are Mr. Cool, even when things go crazy.”
“Madrigal, I have feelings like everyone else, and sometimes I freak out. I just try to keep myself together—that’s all.”
“You freak out?” I tease.
; “Of course,” he says, irritated.
I can’t help continuing my teasing. “You have feelings?”
His dark eyes sit coolly on me. “There’s stuff about me that would probably surprise you.”
“Like what?”
His eyes stay anchored to me. “There’s a lot I care deeply about.”
“That’s not something you need to convince me about. You wouldn’t be in the resistance if you didn’t care deeply about it.”
He nods solemnly. “I’m glad you can see that.”
“I’m not blind.”
“There’s a lot more to me than meets the eye.”
“Tell me more about what I don’t understand about you.”
“I’m not as stuffy as I seem,” he sighs.
“I didn’t say you were stuffy. I said you were mature—you know—solid.”
“Same thing.”
“It’s not a bad thing to be called solid.”
He eyes me carefully. “Sometimes it’s a pain to be the one everyone expects the most from. You’ll see.”
I frown deeply. “You mean because people think I’m the Supernova?”
“Yep.”
“I may not be her. That’s still not a sure thing.”
“You are,” he states, leaving no room in his voice for doubt.
“But—”
“Are we arguing about this again?”
“You don’t want to listen to me. What if the real Supernova is out there, and you’re wasting your time with me?”
He shakes his head. “I’ll say it again—Meggy dreamt it was you.”
“Dreams are foggy and unclear things.”
“Madrigal, Meggy picked you out as the Supernova just like that. She doesn’t seem flighty to me. Does she to you?”
“No,” I grudgingly say, “but people make mistakes.”
He groans loudly. “I guess you’ll have to come to terms with it in your own time.”
I sigh a ragged breath. “I’m not trying to be difficult—I’m really not.”
“Really?” It’s his turn to use a playful tone.
“It’s just that the resistance is so important. We can’t afford to mess up—especially to have the wrong Supernova. The world has to be saved from tyranny!”
His lips upturn in a special smile he uses only rarely. “You’re really something, Madrigal.”
My discomfort over the compliment must show because he stops speaking. His particular smile stays put as he continues to observe me in the silence that has overtaken us. I abruptly shift my eyes away from his, trying to break the spell-like connection. A realization erupts in my head, shaking me like a mega-earthquake.
The guy sitting next to me, the one I thought was hideous and disgustingly ugly when we were in school, has changed before my eyes. Pilar was right when she called him beautiful. As ridiculous as it sounds, I hadn’t noticed his appearance. Our repulsive past had made me see him as the most unattractive of human beings but now that I’m getting to know him better, my view of him is transforming.
I scrunch my face, ordering myself to stop any stray thoughts about Royce. So what if his chocolate hair hangs gloriously rebellious to his shoulders or that his dark eyes illuminate from deep within or that his face and body are chiseled to perfection.
So what?
I’m not going to attach myself to this new way of viewing him.
“Is everything okay, Madrigal?” Royce asks, concerned. “You look strange.”
“I’m fine,” I state quickly.
To my immense relief, Pilar rushes in to where we are before anything else can be said.
“The coast is clear! No training soldiers!”
“Are you sure?” asks Royce.
“Very sure.”
“Great!” Royce says, his voice relieved.
“Awesome,” I let out.
“Those soldiers are gone, gone, GONE!” Pilar chortles happily.
“Time to go,” Royce tells me.
As Meggy’s shack door swings open, a limping Peter staggers out with a determined look on his face. He must’ve seen the exchange between Pilar, Royce, and me from the glassless window. Meggy follows him with frustration, trying to get him back into the shack.
“Look, I know I’ve been a giant pain but I promise I won’t anymore.”
Royce sighs with exasperation. “Peter—”
“I’ll follow orders. Just don’t leave me here with this big mouthed kook,” he pleads, pointing at Pilar.
“Peter, we can’t—”
“Take me with you,” he blurts venomously, “or else . . .”
Supernova Page 21