A ripple moves through Nathan. He gasps and pulls me even tighter to him.
“Sydney Lewis. Whatever happens, I promise I’ll never give you a reason to want to leave again.”
I lay my ear against his chest. His heart pounds hard, and my own feels like it’s about to burst.
“I’ll hold you to it,” I whisper. “I love you too. I love you so much!”
Epilogue
Sydney
Nathan pulls me closer, plants a kiss on the top of my head. ”I’m sorry to put you through this,” he mumbles.
We stand shoulder to shoulder on the sidewalk and study the facade of the restaurant on the opposite side of the street, a fake old Italian look on a modern glass and steel building, complete with checkered red and white curtains. La Trattoria.
”Is this his place?”
Nathan shrugs. ”One of them.”
”Is this really necessary?” I whisper.
”Salvatore calls, you come. It’s how it is. I’m sorry. I never sugar coated…”
I put a finger to his lips, silencing him. ”I know. It’s just—” I exhale with a slight shudder. ”He’s a bad man, isn’t he?”
”You’re safe with me, sweetheart. I’ll never let anyone or anything hurt you. Ever again. I love you so fucking much, Sydney,”
He pulls me into his strong arms and, as always, I lose myself completely in the feel of him against me, his every hard plane, his scent that makes my mind spin with want. I want this man, and I want everything that comes with him.
Or, I do in theory. His family, his business, scares the crap out of me. He’s promised me he’s ‘out’, at least out of the shady side of things, but these are still his people and I have to face them.
Luciano Salvatore has called.
I inhale and then let the air out on a slight shudder. “Let’s do this.”
There’s soft music coming from hidden speakers. A strong scent of garlic permeates the air. Three waiters, two women and one man stand lined up along the far wall, by the bar, neatly dressed in black and white.
By a table in the center of the room sits a man with one leg thrown carelessly on the table, the other on the chair next to him, a tumbler with whisky in his hand. He looks us over as we approach, swirling the contents, then he drains the glass, slams it down next to a terracotta urn with bread sticks, making the cutlery rattle, and stands.
Nathan walks up to him and gives him a rough hug and a slap on his back. “Good to see you, bro. Christian, this is Sydney.” He steps to the side, nodding for me to come closer. “Syd, this is Christian Russo. Gangster extraordinaire. He makes me look like a fucking teddy bear.”
The other man scoffs as his eyes travel along my body, then he offers me his hand.
”So this is the mysterious lady?”
Christian Russo scares me. He’s devastatingly handsome, tall and dark, but there’s something wicked in his gaze, something menacing. I glance at Nathan. There’s darkness in him too, but not like in Christian who oozes of an underlying threat even when he smiles. When he shakes my hand, holding my gaze, he almost crushes it. I flinch and Nathan puts his hand on Christian’s arm.
“Behave, you sick fuck.”
Christian grins. “Just seeing what she’s made of. First time you introduce a woman to the family. She’s gotta be spectacular.”
My eyes dart between the two men. I have an instinct to literally hide behind Nathan, like a shy child would cower behind a parent, but I force myself to stand my ground. This night is going to be a test. I don’t want to be here, the thought of meeting these people makes me nauseous, but by choosing to be with Nathan I have put myself in a position where I’ll have no choice. I have to do this.
“If you only knew, bro,” says Nathan.
“Then you gotta tell me everything. Did she see the real you yet?”
I widen my eyes. The real him? What?
“She’s seen everything.”
“Really now?” Christian gives me a once-over. “I pity her.”
I scoff and loop my arm around Nathan’s. “I think I can handle him.”
Christian lifts an eyebrow, then he barks out a laugh. “We’ll be taking bets on how long you’ll last.”
Nathan stiffens and inhales sharply. I squeeze his arm. “Can I join? I bet I’ll beat you all.”
Christian narrows his eyes, then he smiles. “I like her. Will I be seeing her again?”
“Whenever you see me, bro. I’m not letting this woman go. I fought fucking hard for her.”
“Bet you fucked her hard too.”
I gasp and throw up my hands. “Oh my God!” I pretend offense, but the truth is that heat shoots to my pussy. He really does fuck me hard, and I’m loving every moment.
“Wouldn’t you want to know,” says Nathan and pulls me to him.
Warmth floods my chest and I smile more genuinely toward the scary giant. Maybe this won’t be too awful anyway? Maybe Nathan’s stories about his sordid past and his sketchy family were exaggerated? I reach for a bowl with black olives on the table, plop one into my mouth and chew it slowly, feeling a little calmer. I’ll be fine. Just like he said.
The street sounds increase and there’s a draft, smelling slightly of exhaust from the cars rushing by on the street. I turn and take in the man who walks in. He is as tall as Christian, but a little leaner, blond, wears a dark gray three-piece suit and already from afar I can see that he is spectacularly handsome. He pushes a hand through his hair and strides through the room, barely acknowledging me.
“Chris, you old fart. I thought you lay drunk in some corner of the world, fucking some poor girl who never knew what hit her.”
Christian stands and meets the man half-way, grabbing his hand and then slaps his back so hard that I get a reflex to cough in sympathy. “I know you want a piece of my ass, Eric, but not everything is about sex. Come meet Nathan’s chick. Apparently he’s spilled every dirty secret there is about our family. She’s gonna be formally introduced tonight and then she’s stuck with us forever.” He lays a heavy arm around my shoulders. “You see, little one, you don’t walk away from the mob on your own two legs.”
My heart shoots to my throat. I widen my eyes and stare up at him, then at the other two men in the room, catching Nathan’s gaze, silently pleading with him to help me. He takes a long step toward us and rips Christian’s arm off me, pushing it up on his back.
“Tell her you’re sorry.”
Christian laughs and winces slightly at the same time. “Fuck, man. I can take you down in a second. You really wanna do this?”
“Stop freaking out my woman.”
I glance over at Eric who stands with his arms crossed over his chest, an amused expression on his face. His eyes move from the battling men over to me, meeting my gaze. There is curiosity there, but also suspicion. My stomach churns and my legs feel like they’re filled with lead, but I force myself to walk up to him and give him my hand.
“I’m Sydney. Are they always like this?”
His face lights up in a knee-meltingly beautiful smile and it’s really hard to believe that he too is in this ‘business’. His eyes are an unusual light green and there’s a little dimple in his chin. He dons an expertly cut dark blond stubble and even his messy hair looks like it’s been planned to perfection.
“Pleasure to meet you. Eric Reed. Trust me, they’re behaving for you. Brothers, you know. Normally they’d be on the floor by now.”
I turn and we stand in silence, side by side, watching the other two.
“I learn new things about Nathan every day,” I say and tilt my head, trying to see who’s got the upper hand out of the combatants. They’re so much like boys in this moment that I can’t help smiling. I can almost see the innocent kids they once were.
“You sure of what you’re doing? He’s not an easy man.”
“I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t sure. I’d never put myself through this.”
“You scared?”
“A lit
tle… cautious.”
“You do well to be. Stay on your toes. We’re the cute and cuddly guys. Wait ‘til you meet the boss.”
I freeze. “What about him?”
Eric grins and pats my back. “You’ll see. Just don’t let him get to you.” Striding past me, he shouts to the staff, “Now is there some fucking wine in this joint? If I’m gonna put up with these people...” He nods at Christian and Nathan. They in turn seem to have gotten it out of their system. Both grin and hold up their hands in a gesture of peace.
Nathan turns to me with a roll of his eyes. “Big brother. He’s a bit rough around the edges. He’ll play nice from now on.”
“Play?”
Nathan half shrugs and pulls out a chair, gesturing for me to sit. He leans in and puts his mouth to my ear. “Want some wine, love?”
“Can I have the bottle?” I whisper back.
He chuckles. “Waiter, wine for the lady!” Nathan sits down next to me, Christian and Eric opposite us. Eric unbuttons his suit jacket and shrugs it off his shoulders, hanging it over the back of his chair before he sits. Muscles bulge beneath a pristinely white shirt. Not as lean as I thought at first glance.
I glance around me at the men while we’re being served. They all have this same look of competence, like people you want on your side and not the other way around. My eyes travel to their hands, including Nathan’s. I’ve seen his brutality, his ruthlessness when he beat Fintan to death. This is what they are. They’re all like him. I know with a sudden profound certainty that these men are mafia enforcers and it makes the hair on my nape stand. My life has turned into a surreal soap opera, like something out of the Sopranos.
The door opens and falls closed again. We all look toward it. Nathan stands and I follow his cue. A couple has entered. The man looks as if he owns the world, his gaze sharp and dark, taking us all in as he sheds his coat. He seems to be in his forties. The woman has steel gray hair and a purple coat that he helps her get out of. Two waiters come rushing and all but bow as they take the outerwear.
“Mr. Salvatore, sir. Your table is ready for you.”
“Thank you, Michel. Bianca, dear. This way.” He extends a hand toward us.
She gives me a cold look. “I can see that.”
Nathan darts toward the woman. ”Bianca. This is Sydney.” He turns to me and I hurry to his side.
The woman looks me over, her gaze stony and still slightly curious.
”Syd, this is my mother, Bianca Russo.”
”Pleasure to meet you, ma’am.” I give her my hand and have to hold it up, hovering in the air between us a little too long, before she takes it.
”We will have a word later, young Sydney.”
I suffocate a gasp. Her grip is so tight that when she lets go, I can’t help glancing at my hand. It has white finger-shaped indentations that then redden slightly as I look at it. Yikes! I look up at the woman. The mom of Nathan and Christian. Why am I surprised? Nathan told me that she’s in the business too. I doubt she’s the average apron-wearing, cupcake-baking granny type.
The door opens again and in comes two more men, both in black suits, one has short, blond hair, and the other is shaved. They look like they come from a long career of boxing, with similar looking, crooked noses. They line up on each side of the door, looking at no one. Salvatore doesn't even acknowledge them as he walks up to us, his gaze trained on me.
I fight not to shake as he offers me his hand. When I take it, he raises my hand to his lips and kisses it.
“I’m so excited to meet the woman who brought the eternal bachelor Nathan Russo to his knees. You must be remarkable. I can’t wait to unravel this mystery.”
“Nice to meet you, Mr—”
“Where are my manners? I’m so taken by your beauty that I forget myself completely. I’m Luciano Salvatore.” He’s still holding my hand, holding my gaze.
“Sydney Lewis,” I say and swallow a little harder than I intended. He’s a stunning man, intense, powerful, magnetic, and oozes of self-confidence. He also makes shivers race along my back. Despite his wide smile, there’s a hint of an underlying threat in his eyes, in his whole demeanor, something predatory.
Salvatore looks over my shoulder, drops my hand as if he suddenly lost all interest, and claps his hands. “Serve the wine. Douse us with your excellent food. I’m famished. Time to feast on the best this town has to offer, and then some.” He shakes hands with Nathan, then reaches across the table and repeats it with Christian and Eric.
“Uncle,” says Christian.
“Boss,” says Eric.
Both of them exchange cheek kisses with Mrs. Russo. I follow the interactions and file the information away, trying to sort out who’s who and their relationship with each other.
Nathan holds a hand on the small of my back as we sit, leans in and gives me a peck on the cheek. “You okay?”
“Yes, of course,” I say lightly.
I’m not being entirely honest. If I thought Eric and Christian were intimidating, they’ve got nothing on the capo himself. Or his sister. Nathan’s mom. I remember that he told me she wasn’t the cuddly type. I can believe it.
Salvatore sits at the head of the table. Bianca slaps lightly at Christian’s shoulder and makes him move over so that she can sit closest to the boss. He darts up and holds the chair out for her. I end up between Salvatore and Nathan, opposite Bianca. Nathan squeezes my hand under the table and I clutch it as if for dear life.
“Sadly,” says Salvatore and turns to me, “there are a lot of people missing tonight. My two other nephews Matteo and Luca, and my little niece Angela, won’t be joining us. I’m sure you’ll get plenty of opportunity to meet them if you are everything Nathan claims you to be.”
Angela. I like the sound of that. Another woman. I hope she’s nice.
“I’m here to stay,” I say.
He looks past me, at Nathan. “That’s what I keep hearing.”
The waiters rush back and forth, presenting us a starter that is a huge plate with anti-pasti. I’m somewhat educated on food as well as beverages. I’ve had to be since I’ve had every job that exists in a hotel, including waiting tables. I make sure to thank the staff, but they look nothing but stressed and don't seem to see me.
“Time to eat,” says Salvatore, “before it gets,” he looks at the food, “warm, I guess.” Raising his glass, he takes us all in, one by one. His eyes linger on me a little longer. “Salute! Tonight we welcome Miss Lewis into our fold. I’m looking forward to learning everything about you.”
We all clink our glasses together and I drink a lot more than one swallow. I desperately need some liquid courage.
The food is exceptional, of course. There are two smaller main courses, one fish and one meat. Our glasses keep getting refilled and I have no idea how much I’ve had to drink. I lose track entirely.
The guys don’t hold back. They’re bragging before each other about missions, about people they’ve made sure have gone missing. They’re not using actually incriminating words, but I have no doubt what they mean, and it’s clear they’re testing what I can stomach. Assholes. This is so not my world, but Nathan has promised to keep me far away from all this, and that he’s not going to be a part of it himself anymore. I trust him with all my heart.
I lean in and whisper in his ear. “Restroom?”
“To the right, love, past the bar.”
“Be right back.”
I have to fight to walk straight and my head spins. Ohhh, my God, I’m drinking water from now on, or I’ll end up under the table.
When I’ve done my business and exit to the dark corridor, I find myself nose to chest with Luciano Salvatore. My heart makes a salto mortale, but I assume he’s going too, and nod politely, moving to walk past him.
He slams his palm to the wall, next to my head, stopping my forward movement. “Miss Lewis. I’ve been meaning to have a word with you alone.”
My knees nearly fold. “Oh?” I breathe, unable to come up with any
kind of intelligent response.
He turns toward me fully, making me take a step back, connecting with the wall. My heart hammers in my chest as I look up at him. His eyes glint menacingly in the dark. I feel like a little bunny before the wolf.
“So how are you finding the famiglia?” His voice is dark, almost seductive.
“You’re all very… interesting.”
He smiles. “Interesting? I guess that is true.” He leans in closer, puts his mouth to my ear. “Miss Lewis, what do you want with my nephew?” Straightening, he stands with his chest to mine. I can barely breathe.
“I love him,” I whisper.
“Really now? He’s not a very lovable man. Do you know what he does for a living?”
“Did,” I say, a little firmer. “Did. And I know everything. I know what you are.”
He raises his arm and strokes a finger along my cheek, then he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. His touch burns a long while after he has dropped his arm. “Is that so? And yet you are here. Doesn't it scare you? We’re not good men, Sydney. You’d do better if you run now. Far. Out of my reach.”
I want to faint. I really wish I could just lose consciousness. But where is a good literal fade to black when you need it? “I’m not leaving Nathan. I’ll stay by his side until death parts us.”
“Now, you see, little one. Death comes in many shapes, some say the true death can be a relief. Living in my world can be suffocating for someone who comes from the outside. It’s not for everyone. Some would argue that our way of life is… death.” The last word snaps off his sentence abruptly, making me flinch.
“Nathan isn’t in your world anymore. I know you two talked. I know he’s out.”
Salvatore takes a step back. Dropping the arm he had me cornered with, he then lifts his chin in a brief gesture of acknowledgement. “I’ll be keeping an eye on you. If you’re being honest you have nothing to fear.”
I don’t answer. I want to knee him in his groin. How’s that for honest?
But of course, I don’t.
A shadow falls over us and we both look at the man approaching. Christian. I expect more questions. More threats wrapped up as pleasantries.
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