by Law, Kim
Pressing forward, he touched her mouth as lightly as he had the week before. He simply breathed her in, and he waited to see if she would push him to hurry. She didn’t, though. She let him set the pace. But he could feel that her body was coiled tight, simply through the single touch of his hand to her cheek.
He put a breath of space between them, and then he touched her lips again. This time as more of a nudge.
She nudged back—and his dick came to life.
“Megan,” he whispered against her. Everything inside of him had coiled tight, too.
“What?” she breathed back.
“Don’t let me try to take your clothes off of you on top of this hill, okay?”
When her lips smiled against his, and a little puff of air slipped out from between them, he gave up any pretense, and he went to work. He slanted his mouth over hers, loving the heat and the feel and the taste of her, and then he used his thumb to tug at her bottom lip. She opened wider, and he slipped deeper inside on a long, grateful groan. And then he couldn’t get enough.
Keeping his other hand on the blanket next to hers, he held her with only the one hand, and he continued to feast. He slid his fingers from her cheek to the back of her head. Held her close. And he nipped and sucked and savored for the next several minutes. And then he did it again.
And when he finally forced himself to pull back in order to take in a much-needed breath, he was rewarded by the fact that she seemed as completely fucking lost in the moment as he.
He didn’t turn her loose, but he put enough space between their mouths so that both of them could breathe. So that her glazed eyes could focus. And then he silently reminded himself not to take her clothes off. He not only didn’t want to put on a show for whoever else might be on the island with their own pair of binoculars, but he’d sworn to himself that he’d take things with her slow.
At least as slow as he could.
But that was darned harder than he would have ever thought.
“Did that do enough to tide you over until I can get some food into you?” He noticed the shake to his own voice, but he didn’t find himself embarrassed about it. Instead, he was amazed. No woman had ever made him practically unable to function after nothing more than a kiss.
“Did it tide you over enough?” she rebutted.
“Not nearly.” So he closed the distance and kissed her again.
* * *
The wind whipped around them as they remained stretched out on the blanket. After Nate had finished showing her how unbelievably amazing he could kiss, she’d finally let him feed her. And then she’d fallen asleep. She hadn’t been out for long, but she’d awoken to find Nate stretched out on his side beside her, propped on one elbow and watching her, seeming as content as she.
“When’s the last time you were over here?” she asked now, rolling to her side to match him.
“I have no idea.” He shook his head as he obviously tried to think back. “Not since before I left home, at least. But I used to come out here several times a summer. We had a boat, and I liked nothing better than driving over and sitting right here in this spot.”
She looked at him instead of at the gorgeous view spread out before them. “It’s a beautiful sight.”
“It is.” He looked at her, too. “And I’m a lucky man for getting to see it today.”
She offered him a small smile and told herself not to be stupid and fall for this man on the first date. But geez, he knew how to do a date right. “You’re a charmer,” she accused.
“You make that easy.”
And then she laughed. But when she went to push herself up, he put a hand on her shoulder. “Don’t get up, yet. I’m going to kiss you again in a minute, and I want to test my restraints by doing it in this position.”
Well, how could a girl turn down that?
So, she stayed where she was. “What do we do until you decide it’s time to run your test?”
“We could talk some more?”
They’d talked the entire time they’d been walking. And she’d thoroughly enjoyed it. “Do you have more what-you-did-in-Alaska-that-one-time stories to share?” She grinned as she teased him, and then she noticed the seriousness in his eyes.
“I could come up with some, I’m sure. But I didn’t want to talk about that.”
“Okay.” She nodded, and she almost started to push herself up again, sensing that this wasn’t going to be a laying down type of talk, but since he’d requested her to stay where she was, that’s what she did. “What did you want to talk about?”
“My dad?” he suggested. “Maybe your dad, too?”
Ah. She’d wondered when he’d push that direction again. She had bad news for him, though. The issue with her dad wasn’t all that big of a thing. The man was a hard-working, upstanding, respected guy. She just wished she got more of his attention.
“I want to know who you are, Megan.” Nate touched a finger to the middle of her lip, his eyes both apologizing and pleading. “And to do that, I need to understand where you came from. What made you how you are.”
She got that. It’s why she wanted to know why he’d left home at eighteen.
She nodded, and then she rolled to her back. “What do you want to know?” she asked. The bright blue above her stretched as far as her eyes could see, and she could almost imagine she was floating in it.
“I want to know why your dad cancelled his trip to see you.”
She looked over at him. “Because that’s his MO. Ever since he divorced my mom and started traveling more, he somehow thinks it does as much good to say he’s going to visit and then cancel, as it would if he actually showed up.”
“And when’s the last time he showed up?”
She had to think back. “Probably a year ago in Seattle. Wait . . . no. I went to see him that time. His base office is in Seattle, and I caught him in town.”
“And when before that?”
“I don’t know, Nate. And the when isn’t what’s important. It’s that the man has a way of making me want to beg for his attention, and yet that still wouldn’t be good enough.” She pushed up to both elbows. “And I hate to beg. Especially for love.”
Steady eyes watched her. “I can see where that would be an uncomfortable thing.”
“Yeah?” She dropped back down. “Well, it’s so uncomfortable that I haven’t once begged for anything since he left me when I was ten. Not like that. And I won’t.”
“Like what?”
She looked at him again, and she knew that she could trust him with her pain. “Like my life wouldn’t be complete if someone walked out the door and forgot me.”
Understanding showed in his eyes. “People other than your dad have done that?”
She counted off the names on her fingers. “My dad, my mom, my brother, and both of my sisters.”
“I’m sorry.” The words were simple and said without inflection. But the weight of feeling carried within them touched her.
“Thank you. But there’s no need for you to be sorry.” She offered him a small smile. “It’s just the way it is. Yet, stupidly, I continue to hope. To try to please him.” She let out a sad sounding laugh then and looked back at the sky. “I’ve got news that isn’t going to please him, though. And I’m eventually going to have to share it.”
“About your job?” he guessed, and his understanding didn’t surprise her.
“He thinks I’m still programming full time.”
“And why did you quit?” She looked over at him, surprised at the question. She’d been working full time for the Wildes for almost three months now, of which the two of them had spent a lot of time around each other. And he’d never once asked about her career change.
She answered honestly. “Because it’s not my passion. It doesn’t make me excited to get up and start every day. And don’t get me wrong, I’m good at it. But I can be good at anything I do.”
A soft smile touched his lips. “I have no doubt.”
“I also qui
t because I got the degrees in the first place purely for him.”
She’d known her dad wouldn’t like her quitting long before she’d done it. But once she’d broken up with Jaden, she couldn’t see continuing on the same course she’d been on. She’d needed to be more her than she’d been in years. And she didn’t want to sit at a computer all day. She didn’t want a job where she was as alone during the daytime hours as she’d so often been the rest of her life.
Nate picked up her hand. “And if you took the job in Chicago . . .”
She knew he got it. “Then maybe my dad would ‘care’ more. Visit more.” It wouldn’t happen, though. She hadn’t been a priority in years, and if she couldn’t get him to come see her when she lived in the same city as he, he wouldn’t be likely to make the trek to Chicago. “Points,” she muttered, knowing Nate would continue to follow her train of thought. Maybe she could score points if she took the job. And maybe someday those points would add up enough that it would make her worth her dad’s time.
“You don’t need those kinds of points.” Nate’s words came out rough, and the sound sent a shiver through her body. But he was right. She didn’t need them. And she was finished trying to score any.
“I’ve got all I need in Birch Bay,” she told him. “I know that I originally moved here because of Jaden, but the truth is, my heart never left the place after my first trip to the area.”
He brought her fingertips to his lips. The soft touch of his mouth grazing her skin filled her with the kind of pleasure she’d always sought. It was comfort, trust, and support. All rolled into one. It was saying that he was listening. And that he cared.
“Enough about him,” he said as he pressed one last kiss to her knuckles. Then he offered her another smile. “Let’s talk about something happier. Tell me more about your aunt and uncle.”
The request was innocent enough, but dang if tears didn’t immediately appear in her eyes.
“Meg.”
He started to push up, and she shook her head, unable to speak and silently asking him to give her a moment, while the tears that had appeared quickly slipped from the corners of her eyes. They tracked toward her hairline, but she didn’t bother to swipe them away. Because he was right. Her aunt and uncle were a far happier topic.
“My aunt and uncle took me in when I was sixteen and my mom was moving to Oregon with Number Two.” She could still remember that day. She’d been so excited to move in . . . while at the same time, so broken over why it was happening. “Aunt June was Mom’s sister, but they were complete opposites. She was warm and caring. With everyone she met. And I came first with her.”
“They took good care of you, then?”
“They took great care of me. They were more than happy to let me finish out high school under their roof. Uncle Ray was already sick by the time I moved in, so we knew we were going to lose him soon. But Aunt June and I had each other. And we would always have each other. Only—”
Her throat threatened to close, so she stared back at the sky and willed her tears away.
“She got into an accident my sophomore year,” she finally managed. “Coming to see me during family day. She died instantly.”
“Oh, Meg.” He clung tightly to her hand. “I’m so sorry.”
Megan nodded without looking back over. “At least she didn’t have to lie there in pain.” She swallowed. “I got the call an hour after most other families had arrived. I was just sitting in my room waiting. And the phone rang.”
She could remember that day like it was yesterday. For the first time, she’d thought Aunt June had decided she had better things to do, too.
His thumb stroked over the back of her hand. “Are you mad at her for leaving, too?”
“What?” She jerked her gaze to his. “No. Of course not. I’m . . .” More tears slipped out, and the knot in her throat grew. “I’m not supposed to be mad at a dead woman, Nate,” she whispered, and then Nate’s arms closed around her. “I’m not supposed to be mad at the only person who said she’d never leave me.”
A flood of tears came out then, and she let Nate hold her as they did. He rocked them back and forth on the blanket, murmuring soothing words and stroking her hair as he did, and when she’d cried herself out and had to look one hundred percent a mess, he lifted his head and smiled gently down at her.
“Can I test out my restraint now?” he asked, and it took her a minute to figure out what he was talking about.
She let out a single hiccupy sob. “You made me cry like a baby, and then you want to kiss me?”
He nodded, his eyes smiling, and her grip on keeping him at a distance slipped.
“Fine, Wilde. Kiss me. See if you can do it without trying to take my clothes off.”
Chapter Seventeen
He’d kissed her. And he hadn’t taken her clothes off. He’d wanted to, though.
And now they were docking back at the house, and all he could do was think that he wasn’t ready to let her go yet. If she didn’t want to have sex, he’d respect that. He’d ask to do no more than be with her a while longer. But he’d never had the kind of day he’d had today. One he didn’t want to end.
He tied the boat to the pier, deciding he’d wait until tomorrow to return it, then he hopped onto the dock where Megan waited. He took both her hands in his and planted another kiss on her gorgeous mouth. The guys who were staying next door wouldn’t be able to see them from there, and the house was too far up the hill for his dad and Gloria to see, as well. So, he took his time. And he made love to Megan’s mouth.
When he pulled back, he kept his arms around her waist and peered down at her. Her cheeks were pink from too much time in the sun, and her hair was a mess. Also, any makeup she might have put on earlier in the day had been destroyed by her earlier crying jag. But she’d never looked more beautiful.
“Will you stay with me tonight?” He let his need for her show.
“Where?”
Nodding toward the cliff, he said, “In cabin ten. It’s still dusty, but I swept up in there this morning.” He tilted his head to the side. “I also stored a blow-up mattress in there. Just in case.”
At her sexy smile, he added, “As well as candles…champagne, strawberries…”
She put a hand over his mouth. “Did you set up a seduction scene for me?”
He didn’t think she was complaining, but he wanted to make his intentions clear. He held her chin between his thumb and forefinger, making sure she didn’t look away. “It doesn’t have to be anything more than you’re ready for. But I’m not ready for the day to end. That said”—he pulled in a deep breath and plunged ahead—“I’m also not making promises I don’t know if I can keep. That I don’t know if I’m capable of.” He touched his thumb to her bottom lip, and he got lost in her eyes. “I don’t ever want to mislead you, Meg. So, right now, I’m only making the promise to try.”
She gazed back at him, the lowering sun reflecting off her hair and making the dark strands look burnished. And he saw the same need he felt reflected back at him. “Do you want to be capable of more?”
He nodded. “I very much do.”
“Then that’s enough for me right now.”
He couldn’t have been more grateful.
Putting his hands to her hips, he pulled her in to him, and then he kissed her again. This time when he did, he let a little more of the fire he’d been holding in all day show, and when her arms hooked around his neck and one leg inched up the outside of his thigh as it had at her place, he gripped her under the butt and pulled her up to his groin.
“You make me crazy, Megan Manning. You make me instantly hard and completely unable to have any ability to think.”
She nipped at his bottom lip and locked her ankles behind his waist. “The best way to have a man is hard and without the ability to think.”
He laughed, the free and light feeling inside him one he couldn’t ever remember having, then he started up the path with her in his arms. They’d gotten halfway
up when he could make out the point to the roof that covered the second-floor deck off the master bedroom, and he suddenly stopped. That’s the bedroom that had always been his dad’s.
When Megan looked at him questioningly, he let her slide to the ground, but he kept an arm around her shoulders. His dad would never be in that room again. He was relegated to the first floor now. And it was Nate’s fault.
“I couldn’t bring myself to visit him while he was in rehab,” he said, “because it was my fault he was there to begin with.”
She immediately understood where the conversation had gone. “How could it have been your fault? You didn’t know he was sick. None of us did.”
“But I knew something was wrong.”
He stared down at her. “Deep down, I’d known it for weeks. We’d had a bad ice storm once when I was a kid. One that took out quite a few trees. And Dad was worried then, too. But he didn’t go out to check on them every morning. And never once before daylight. Nothing required that kind of scrutiny because there’s nothing you can do for the trees once the damage is done.”
“That still doesn’t—”
She stopped talking when he held up a hand, and he looked back at the house and continued. “I knew he was getting up every morning this time. And I’d tried to talk him out of it. Tried telling him it was ridiculous to do so, but he wouldn’t listen. So that last week, I met him downstairs every morning. I didn’t offer to do the check in his place. Instead, I was waiting for him to ask me. And if he’d just asked, I would have. I’d have been out there in an instant,” he gritted out, still mad that no one had ever considered that he might want to be a part of running things. “If he’d just needed me.
“I knew something was wrong,” he went on. “I hadn’t been able to put my finger on it, but he had moments where he just seemed to be somewhere else. And the morning of the accident, he had one of those moments.” He dragged his gaze back to Megan’s again, not wanting her to see his guilt, but at the same time, needing to show it to someone. “He was talking to the door when I came downstairs, Megan. Dear God. And I swear he thought it was talking back to him. So, I offered.” He pulled in a breath and kept going. “I didn’t think ‘gee, something is obviously wrong with Dad, and I need to make sure he doesn’t go out on the tractor this morning.’ No, I just offered to go for him. And when he said no . . . when it felt like he’d pushed me aside because I couldn’t possibly do the job as good as he could . . . I stormed out and left him to it.”