I groaned when the taste hit my tongue. I hated praising the asshole in any way, but it was the best peanut butter and jelly sandwich I’d ever had. I was so hungry I wanted to swallow the whole thing in one bite, but I forced myself to go slow. No point in eating it too fast just to have it come back up.
“So, Anna, how the hell are we gonna get out of here?” I asked, after swallowing my last bite and drinking half my juice.
Kandace laughed. “Honey, you might as well rub a lamp. There is no way to get out of here.”
“Nina figured it out,” I said in a very matter-of-fact way.
“Yeah, in a body bag,” Linda replied.
“So then we figure out what she did wrong and not do it again,” Anna said with a little enthusiasm.
“Does that mean you’re in?” I asked.
“Hell, yes. I’m beyond ready to get out of here.”
Sara apparently agreed. “Then let’s get the fuck out of here!” she said.
“I’m in,” Ruth added, with Linda saying the same soon after.
“What about you, Kandace?” I asked.
“Sure, why not? It’s not like I’ve got anything better to do.”
“So, Anna, you’re next to me, right?” I pounded my fist against the left wall, waiting for a reply.
“Yep,” she answered, pounding back. “And Sara is in the room next to me.”
“And you said Ruth is right across from me?”
“You’re right, Lee,” Ruth agreed. “And Linda is to my right.”
“And I’m on the other side of Linda,” Kandace yelled.
I looked around to see what I had, and as usual it consisted of a bucket, mattress, four walls, my chain, and a carpeted floor.
“What are you thinking over there, Lee?” Anna asked.
I looked at the wall and an idea popped into my head. “How thick do you think these walls are?”
“Not too thick, I guess. Why?”
“Well they’re not cement, or we wouldn’t be able to push against the walls like we can, so I’m guessing they’re just pressboard.” I pushed all over the wall, listening for a weak spot. I noticed the lower I got, the easier it was to push. “You see that, Anna?”
“Yeah, what does it mean?”
I knelt on the floor and started pulling at the carpet in the corner. It pulled away from the floor with little effort, and I jumped for joy when I saw that it was only dirt below, but the best part was that you could see the bottom of the wall. “Anna, below the carpet is dirt, and the walls don’t go underground.”
“Are you suggesting we dig our way out?” Kandace laughed.
“Not out, just to each other.”
“And have you forgotten our little leash problem?” Kandace sighed, moving her chain around loud enough to make a point.
“One problem at a time. Let me work on the chain thing while you guys just start digging.”
“Where do we hide the dirt?” Ruth asked.
“In your bucket or mattress if you can,” Linda answered. “At least it will block out some of the smell.”
“Just not too much,” I called out. “We don’t want him to notice anything.”
I looked down at my chain and scratched my head, grimacing and pulling my hand away. My nails were filled with gunk and dirt. I wanted a shower in the worst way. My skin was starting to itch from the amount of accumulated crap caked over it. All this did was energize my brain into trying to figure out a way to get the chain off.
How the fuck do I get you off?
The room fell silent when we heard the song stop. I closed my eyes and sighed. With all my heart I thought of everyone I loved, with the last face flashing by being Richard’s. I held on to that image, tightly, wrapping it around me like a security blanket. It had become my routine every time I heard that song shut off.
“I love you,” I whispered when I heard the jingling of keys coming down the stairs.
Four Days Missing
—Richard
Time seemed to stand still. Police detectives and FBI investigators began circulating in and out of the girls’ apartment like flies after the discovery of the body in Gold Hill. It was confirmation, without anyone officially saying so, that the body had belonged to one of the missing girls.
Agent Chase, the man assigned to investigate the abductions, interviewed each of us for almost an hour. We went over everything with him, from what Lee was wearing the day she went missing, to what she had eaten for lunch, to where and when she had made the service appointment that she was supposed to have gone to when she left campus. These were things that we had already discussed with the police department when we filed the initial missing person’s report, and I saw it as a big waste of time. They should have been out there looking for the guy who took Lee, not bothering her loved ones by asking the same questions over and over.
Lee’s mom, Sadie, had taken a leave of absence from her job and began coming and going from the apartment as well. Before anyone even realized it, she had practically moved in and taken over the household. Cooking, cleaning, washing, she was doing it all. A few times Emma and I had caught her standing in Lee’s room, crying, but we never said anything. We understood that she had her own way of coping with the situation, and the fact that she was with us seemed to help her. It was terribly difficult for me, though. With her long blond hair and slim figure, Sadie looked a lot like Lillian, especially from the back. It was hard on my heart to walk into a room and think I’d seen Lee for a split second, just to realize it wasn’t her. It was never her.
Noah didn’t seem to be taking things well either. Despite being relieved that it hadn’t been Lee, he had become almost inconsolable once the body we’d seen was identified as Nina Rosado. To him, it was proof that whoever had taken Lee was not just a kidnapper but a killer, and we didn’t have much time left to find Lee.
“I know I don’t have to tell you the statistics, Richard.”
“No offence, Noah, but please try to keep these feelings to yourself,” I whispered. “I’m not going to have you upsetting everyone by saying such things.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to—”
“I know,” I said, nodding. “They just don’t need to be hearing that, especially your mom.”
“How is she holding up?”
“If cleaning is what she does when she’s a mess, then she’s hardly holding on.” I lit a cigarette and took a long pull. “Were there any new leads after they looked at the body?”
Noah shook his head. “They took everything to a forensic lab. They won’t know, or won’t say, until the tests come back.”
“I need to know this, Noah, and don’t give me the CliffsNotes’ version.” I paused before taking a deep breath. “What did this psycho do to that girl?”
“Richard, I can’t. I can’t think about it again.” Noah went to walk away, but I stopped him and swung him around.
“No, you don’t get to keep this to yourself,” I said, close to yelling. “I need to know! Six girls are still missing, Noah, and Lee is one of them. I want to know what that sick bastard is doing.”
Tears fell from his eyes as he looked into mine. “He brutalized her in every way you could think of,” he whispered. “And I’m sorry, Richard, but I don’t have the stomach to spell out to you what, specifically, that means.” Then he removed my hand from his shoulder and walked away.
I stood there in agony for what seemed like hours, imagining all the things my beautiful girl could be going through. I could literally feel my heart squeezing in my chest. I didn’t want to acknowledge the possibility that I might never see Lee again, but I couldn’t help it, and the thought alone had me on the edge of sanity. I had to get away. I pulled my keys out of my pocket and ran toward my car. I had to get away from the apartment.
Chapter 5
Day Seven
—Lillian
“You fucking coward!” I screamed, banging against the wall. I could hear Anna crying out in pain as he continued to attack her
. “You’re such a spineless piece of shit.”
“Oh, I love it when you talk dirty to me, Lilly,” he said.
The mix between the cries, moans, and slapping almost made me vomit. I was pulling so hard on my chain that I could feel it cutting through my skin.
“Eat shit, minute man,” I shouted, letting my emotions get the better of me. “You want dirty? Take this fucking chain off me and I’ll show you dirty, you fucking cock sucker!” I began pacing back and forth, slamming my fist into the wall when I neared it, and wishing it could have been his face. “Just give me five minutes—five minutes to show you—”
My rant was cut off by a loud thud in Anna’s room, and then a few slaps against the wall. I stopped pacing and put my ear against it, hearing his grunting.
“I’m gonna fuck you up till you bleed, Lilly. And it’s gonna feel so good,” he whispered.
“You first,” I yelled back, slamming my fists against the wall. There were a few loud bangs against the wall again and then the sound of him pulling up his pants. After, he left the room, shutting Anna’s door behind him. I was seething when I heard him sigh as he strapped on his belt. He came over and stopped in front of my door, and I just stood there, waiting for the next round against this prick.
“Promises, promises,” he said, laughing.
“That’s not a promise, it’s a fucking guarantee, shit head!”
We were all silent as we listened to him. But instead of entering my room, he turned and walked up the stairs, leaving us in our dark solitude.
Anna’s whimpers echoed around us as we waited for the music to start. Once it did, I knelt against the wall and wept.
“Anna, are you okay?” Ruth called.
“Just give me a minute,” she answered, sounding like she was having a hard time catching her breath.
I went over to the corner of the room, lifted the carpet, and started digging. After a while I could hear Anna on the other side doing the same. I remained that way for a long time, digging silently, until she spoke.
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“He didn’t finish—in me—because of what you said.”
I leaned against the wall. “What do you mean, he didn’t finish?”
“He went over to the wall and jerked off on it.”
“Are you serious?” If I wasn’t sitting already, I would have fallen over with shock. “God, he’s such a sick fuck.”
“What? What’s going on?” Sara asked.
“The asshole jerked off on Anna’s wall.” I didn’t know why I was laughing, but for some reason I found it to be hilarious.
All the girls started laughing while Anna continued talking. “It was kinda weird, though. He acted like . . . it was almost as if he liked it.” She giggled. “Like, he liked you calling him all those names.”
With that comment, I stopped laughing. Shit, good job, Lee. I sighed and banged my head against the wall.
“Lee, what’s wrong?” Anna whispered, so the other girls couldn’t hear.
He’d figured out that no matter how many times he beat me, I wouldn’t cry out, crippling his ability to get his rocks off, but he knew it pissed me off that he hurt the other girls.
He’s gonna go after them to get to me.
“Nothing.”
“Are you sure?”
“Shouldn’t I be asking you that question?” I asked with a sad smile.
She huffed as I heard her lean against the wall. “As sad as it is to say this, I’m used to it. I’ve been here the longest.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. You have given us hope, Lee. Without you, we would just be sitting here waiting to die.”
It made me smile knowing that I was helping in some small way. We had become a sisterhood, all of us leaning on each other for comfort. He hadn’t raped me yet, and I stressed yet, but I knew my time would come soon. Hearing the girls cry out in pain every day was my reminder. The reminder that it wasn’t a case of if, but when.
“Lee?” Anna’s voice rang out, pulling me from my daze.
“Yeah?”
“Look!”
I looked down and saw that she had dug enough to be able to stick a few of her fingers under the wall. I bent down and smiled, touching her small fingers.
She pulled them back and laughed. “I wish I had the words to say how awesome this feels.”
“Me, too.” I let a few happy tears fall. Coughing, so Anna couldn’t hear the quiver in my voice, I said, “I hate to ask this, Anna, but were you able to feel for anything in his pockets? Anything we could use to get out of these chains?”
“No, and I hate that I had never thought of that, but . . . I do have these.” I looked down to see her fingers push two bobby pins under the wall.
I couldn’t help but laugh. “My chain doesn’t have a lock on it, Anna. And even if it did, I would have no idea how to pick one.”
“None of our chains do, but you never know when they could be useful, right?”
“What? What are you guys talking about?” Ruth asked.
“Anna gave me a pair of bobby pins.” I smiled. “I guess that’s the equivalent of going steady around here.”
“You guys can reach each other already?” Linda asked.
“Yep, and Anna is in dire need of a manicure,” I said, trying to lighten the mood.
“I’m so jealous,” Ruth grumbled.
“Don’t worry, sweet pea, we’re almost there,” Linda said with a smile in her voice.
I looked down at the two bobby pins in my hand and sighed. Besides stabbing the fucker in the eyes with these, what the fuck could I do with them?
Seven Days Missing
—Richard
Search parties had formed around the surrounding forest areas of Gold Hill after Nina’s body was discovered. Agent Chase asked us if we wanted to participate, but that question was answered when Luke had to stop Noah from pulling his gun out on the guy. Fucking idiot. Luke should have let Noah shoot the dumb ass for asking such a thing. We all knew we wouldn’t be able to handle it if we found Lee dead.
“Lee wouldn’t want you to fail out, Richard,” Emma said, being more persistent than usual. Luke, Emma, and Adam started going back to class, and tried to convince me that I should go, too, but I just couldn’t.
“Seriously? You’re gonna pull that card on me?” I yelled, walking over to the couch and sitting down.
“It might help distract you a little,” Adam said. “Get you out of the apartment for a few hours out of the day.”
“I don’t want to be distracted, Adam, I want to be out there!” I pointed out the window to the few reporters who still mingled around the complex. “I want to be ransacking every damn house until I find her. How the fuck am I supposed to concentrate on anything but her?” I looked down and ran my hands through my hair, trying to keep my tears at bay. I needed to keep it together.
“I’m just saying—”
“No!” I stood up and walked to him so that we were inches from each other. “What if it was Emma?” I asked, pointing over his shoulder at her. “What if she had been taken? Would you be leaving for class right now or would you be here, chain smoking”—I let a tear spill over— “and praying that every time the phone rang it would be her voice on the other end?”
He gripped my shoulders and pulled me into a hug. I pulled at his shirt and held on for dear life as I finally let my walls fall, letting my sobs take over. I couldn’t ever remember crying so hard before in my life. I could hear Emma in the background crying, too, and that just made me feel worse.
“Oh my God,” Lee’s mother whispered, dropping the plate in her hands. It shattered into a million pieces as she fell to her knees on top of the glass. “Not my baby,” she said. “Not my little girl.” Adam and I rushed to her, lifting her off the ground so she wouldn’t cut herself.
“No, Sadie, no,” I said, pulling her to me, and rocking her back and forth. “I just . . . needed a moment. We still haven’
t heard anything.”
“Oh, thank God,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around me and crying into my shoulder. I rubbed her back and apologized over and over for upsetting her, until her tears subsided. After a few minutes she pulled away, took my face in her hands, and gave me a playful glare. “Next time you need to take a moment, do it in the bathroom,” she said. “Understand?”
“Yes, ma’am,” I agreed, giving her a hug. “I’m sorry.”
“I know.”
After watching Sadie walk away, I turned to Emma and my heart fell from the look in her eyes. I reached for her and she rushed into my arms. It had been a long time since I’d held my sister this way, but these last couple of days had changed our relationship. It’s sad that it had taken Lee going missing for that to happen. She buried her face in my chest and I stroked her long brown hair as tears escaped her eyes. “Em, please don’t think for one second that I wouldn’t be just as destroyed if it was you who were taken,” I whispered, kissing her hair. “I love you with all my heart. Never forget that.”
“I love you, too,” she whispered with a sniffle. “Even when you don’t think before you speak.”
I had to laugh at that. Our mom always said that to us when we were growing up.
The front door swung open and Luke walked in. “That’s what I’m talking about,” he said, walking over to us and wrapping his arms around both of us. “Family hug!”
“Oh my God, Luke,” Emma said. “Get off.” We all chuckled, including Adam, who was now helping Sadie pick glass up off the floor.
“Richard.” The soothing, familiar voice made me choke up, and I turned to see my mom and dad standing in the front doorway. My mom started walking toward me but I met her halfway, wrapping my arms around her.
“Richard, I am so sorry. We’ll find her. I can feel it,” she whispered, kissing my cheek. “Whatever you guys need. Money, private detectives, anything.” She sniffled, pulling away and kissing my cheek. “It’s yours.”
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