“Okay, so should I meet you and the others somewhere for the outing?”
“Oh, I’m glad you’re coming. It’ll be fun. Why don’t we meet you here, say ten?”
“I’ll be ready.”
“Fantastic. Well, I better get back to Sue’s and get the girls. See ya, River.”
“Bye, Sami,” I said and watched as she walked to Sue’s house before I closed the door. Once in the kitchen, I pulled out the things I needed and started on dinner.
“I’m stuffed. That was great, honey. Thank you,” my dad said, and I grinned as he pushed his plate away.
“Well, that is terrible. Who’s going to eat the pie?” I asked as I got up from the table, picking our empty plates up. Once I placed them in the sink, I grabbed the pie off the counter and set it on the table.
“If you keep feeding me like this, I’m going to need bigger uniforms.”
I smiled when he pushed his chair back and went to the cabinet, grabbed a couple of small plates and a knife before he joined me back at the table. After I cut us each a slice, I set my dad’s piece in front of him, and he groaned when he took his first bite.
“I’ll remember that next time I cook and leave out the dessert part of the meal,” I said as I scooped up my first bite.
“Hey! Not on my account. I could use new uniforms.”
I shook my head as I brought the next fork full to my mouth. We finished the pie in silence, then my dad insisted on helping me clean the kitchen.
“Want to sit on the patio for a bit, or do you need to head home?” I asked as I handed him the last pan to dry.
“I’d love to. Need to let that delicious meal settle.”
After pouring us each another glass of tea, we headed out the back door to the patio.
“This is nice,” I said and used the toe of my shoe to kick the patio swing in motion.
“It is, for a number of reasons,” my dad said and put his arm around me and squeezed. “Having you here is the best part, River. I know the circumstances that brought you here suck, but I refuse to dwell on them. I’m too damn happy that you’re here. I’m tempted to call Thomas and thank him for fucking up.”
“Dad,” I said and rested my head on his shoulder. We rocked back and forth quietly, not sure how long we stayed in our own thoughts.
“So...” Dad began, then cleared his throat, “How did the rest of your day go?” His tone had me lifting my head to look at him. What I saw made me smile.
“Boy, that face and your eyes just gave me a brief look at what growing up here with you as the sheriff would have been like. I wouldn’t have gotten by with much, would I have?”
“What, you think because you’re grown it makes a difference?” I watched his jaw tighten while he stared back at me. I couldn’t imagine anyone holding up under his scrutiny.
“You can’t be serious?” He lifted his brow at my question but didn’t answer.
No way could he know what happened at lunch or in front of the bakery. For once I did what I said and hadn’t thought of Dom.
“Gee, okay. Dom showed up at lunch, and it didn’t go well. But if I’m going to be honest, some blame is on me. The man gets under my skin and then I act like a spoiled teenager. Then I wanted to get your favorite pie, and I almost took out Dom’s dad, Flyboy, in front of the bakery. And he and I might have said a few smartass things to each other. There, happy?”
“You wouldn’t have gotten away with anything,” Dad said and laughed when I stared at him. “Don’t feel bad, honey. A lot of people crack easily.”
“You knew nothing, and I told you?”
“I didn’t say that. I knew basically what happened at Soft Tails because Dom stopped by the station to pick some paperwork up from me. He told me, and he took all the blame. Said his behavior was rude and he had no excuse for it. But running over his dad—that I didn’t know.” Dad chuckled. “God, River, his father? Should I be worried that you have it out for the Amara men?”
“It isn’t funny.” I plopped back on the swing and crossed my arms over my chest. “The other men accused me of that, too.”
“Other men?”
“Yeah. Romeo, Preacher, Stroker, Cruz.”
“Thanks for the heads up. I’m sure I’ll catch shit when I see them again.”
“Why would they say anything to you? I’m the one who backed into the spot, but in my defense, they shouldn’t have been crossing the street from there!” I turned my head and looked at my dad when he started laughing.
“Did you tell them that?” I nodded, and he laughed harder. At my glare, he got himself under control and continued. “I’m sorry, honey. I wasn’t laughing at you. I was laughing thinking of Stroker’s and the others’ faces. They aren’t used to having people stand up to them. But I guess with the women their sons are pairing off with, maybe they’re learning to take things in stride.”
“You said Dom came by to pick up papers, wasn’t that what he came by for earlier?”
“Well...we had a little disagreement before.” I furrowed my brows at him but didn’t speak. “Fine, he pissed me off, and we had words, then he left. He came back to apologize.”
“Dad, I’m sorry I put you in the middle. It wasn’t fair to you. He throws me off balance, and I don’t like that feeling.”
“Come here,” Dad said and pulled me back to his side. “I’ve tried over the years to let you live without interference from me. Mainly because I didn’t feel like I had the right to since I was only around for a short time each summer. From a distance I watched you grow into a beautiful, smart woman. I also noticed the struggle with you trying to find your way, instead of what your mother expected of you. Then you married Thomas right out of college, and I felt I missed the opportunity to exert any advice. My life was here, I never wanted to move. Your mother, she wanted to be anywhere but here. And the one person who we both should have protected paid the price for her and my decisions. I should’ve fought to keep you closer than giving in and letting your mother take you across the country.”
“Dad.” He squeezed my shoulder.
“Let me finish. Yes, I spent vacation time with you, but I should have insisted that your summers were spent here. Instead, I listened to your mother about how it would disrupt the structure of your childhood. That idiotic shit is on me. I love you, River, and I hope you know I would do anything to see you happy.”
“I love you, too, Dad. And I’m getting there. Don’t worry about me. I’m settled in the house and looking forward to starting my teaching job. I’m even going shopping with Sami, Bailey, Carly, and Luna. I may not have grown up here, but, Dad, this feels like home. And a lot of that has to do with you being here. You might feel you’ve let me down, but I never have.” I tilted my head and kissed his cheek.
Sometime during us talking the swing stopped, so I gave it a push to start it back up.
“Going to tell me what’s going on between you and Dom?”
“What happened to not interfering?”
“I think I said tried. That was before. You’re here now. So...”
“Honestly, Dad, I’m not sure. After Thomas, I don’t know if I can trust my feelings. And Dom is confusing. One minute, he acts as though he is irritated I breathe the same air, then he is kissing me, and I—” I stopped talking when I realized what I let slip.
“What the hell, River?”
I sat up straight to see my dad’s face. He was pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers and had his eyes closed. I watched as he lowered his hand, then took a deep breath before he opened his eyes.
“Dad?”
“Give me a minute.”
The way he spoke had me grinning. This was the side of my dad I missed out on when I grew up and started dating. “Take all the minutes you need. But, Dad, you know I’ve been kissed and—”
“Stop! I know somewhere in my mind that you’re a grown woman who has been married. I get what that entails, but...knowing and hearing about it as the woman’s father doesn’t
work well. Yes, when I look at you, I see an adult,” he moved his hand to his heart, “in here, you will always be my little girl. It is also the place where there will never be a man good enough for you. With that said, I know you’re unsure of yourself because of that cheating ass, son-of-a-bitch pansy you were married to.”
“Don’t hold back how you feel, Dad,” I said, and when he glared at me, I couldn’t stop from smiling.
“Smartass. Everything I said about him is true. But back to you. Don’t let what happened with him keep you from finding happiness with another man. Whether it’s Dom, or someone else. Know that I will be happy when you do. I just don’t want to share in the details.”
“I’ll try. Not sure I’m ready though.”
“You’ll know when you are. Don’t let anyone push you if you aren’t.”
“I can’t say it enough. Coming here was the best decision I’ve made in a long time.”
“I’m glad you made it, too. Now, how about feeding me another piece of that apple pie before your old dad heads home?”
“You got it. Come on, I might be swayed to make you some coffee to go with it.”
My dad stood and held out his hand. I grabbed ahold, and he pulled me up, then we headed into the house.
“You’re the best daughter,” my dad said when I started the coffee pot.
“I’m your only daughter.”
He laughed as I had wanted. Spending time with my dad these last couple of months had been the best. Now, if I only knew what to do about Dom, but that could wait, I had plenty of time.
Chapter Seven
Jag
Up, showered, dressed, and ready for the day to start, I sat at the table with my coffee as the sun was rising. Flipping through the last of the sheriff’s documents, I made notations to the side with my suggestions for him to go over.
I’d gone back to his office yesterday and apologized for what had taken place between us earlier. Will Lance was a good man, a good sheriff, and always fair, but tough. So after we talked it out and he said, “I know a lot of places to hide a body,” he meant it.
The knock on my back door had me turning to see Coast through the window, and I rose, turned the lock, then grabbed an extra mug as he walked in.
“Saw your light on. Glad to know I’m not the only one not sleeping,” Coast said as a greeting and reached for the coffee mug I held out to him.
“Yeah, well, at least I got some work done,” I said pointing to the stack of papers as we sat down. “What’s keeping you up?”
“Same old shit creeping up. Weeks go by and nothing, then something triggers it and bam...a few nights reliving missions I wish could have ended differently. Guess I should be thankful it only hits every so often.”
“I can’t relate, but I’ve read about PTSD and dealt with a few soldiers who suffered with it as they dealt in court because of their actions,” I said as I gathered the sheets of paper and slid them back into the envelope.
“Vicious cycle. Wouldn’t wish any of it on my worst enemy,” Coast said and got up and grabbed the coffee pot and brought it to the table. “We didn’t get a chance to talk yesterday about what happened with you and River, between helping set up the equipment at the gym and making sure the massage side is ready to go. Is that the reason you’re up at the butt crack of dawn?”
I reached for the coffee pot, filled my cup, then leaned back in my chair and took a drink. My brother sat quietly and waited me out.
“Have you ever felt that if you don’t do something right, you won’t get a second chance?”
“I guess. When my team was sent out on missions, the pressure was there that one screw up would cost us. You can’t make someone undead, regardless of what they sometimes portray in movies. What is going on with you, Jag? You were somewhat acting like your old self when we went back inside to finish lunch yesterday.”
“She gets to me, Coast. And I’m not sure why because we butt heads every time we are around each other. Yet there’s something about her... Christ, I feel like a teenager who wants the girl but doesn’t want to get crushed if she doesn’t want him,” I said, bent my head, and rubbed the back of my neck. Coast chuckling had my heading snapping up.
“You know, I’ve got endless hours of enjoyment watching Speed, Crusher, Devil, and even Ghost stumble around their women. You, Flirt, and I have discussed and laughed about it at their expense. We also said we wouldn’t make the same mistakes, so stop thinking about messing it up. If you want to see if there’s anything between you two, then go for it. Because if there is something there, a few mistakes along the way will be worth it in the end. God knows I’ve got my own issues to work through with Mac but watching how River gets you fired up—must mean something. If I were you, I wouldn’t give her too much time to think.”
“Like you’ve done with Mac?”
“Pretty much. So don’t be an asshat, if she is meant to be yours, go after her until she’s convinced.” Coast got up and placed his coffee cup in the sink, then looked at me when he opened the door. “Only thing planned today is cleaning up the businesses and checking in on the renovations at Soft Tails. Bet you could think of something else to do.” Coast grinned, and I laughed.
“Yeah, I have a few ideas.”
Coast grinned. “Well, I’ll tell the others you had something else pressing today,” he said, then walked out. Before the door closed behind him, I heard, “And another one down.”
Laughing, I walked to the sink and washed the few dishes that sat inside. By the time I finished, I knew exactly what I wanted to do. If I dropped by the sheriff’s station first and went over my notes with Will, the sun would have had time to warm the air.
I grabbed the envelope off the table, snagged my keys, and headed out the door toward my bike. There was a plan to initiate.
“You didn’t have to rush with those, Dom,” Sheriff Lance said when I dropped the envelope on his desk.
“No problem. If you have time now, we could go over my suggestions, then I can get the changes fixed for you.” I sat in the chair in front of his desk.
“Sure.” He opened the envelope, pulled out the paperwork, and started to flip through. “You’re out early.”
“Yeah, figured I would get these to you and give the day a chance to warm up.”
“You guys going riding today?” Will asked while he continued to look over the papers.
“No, just me. I planned to ride today and take River with me. Figured she would enjoy the ride a little better if it were warmer.” Will frowned at my statement but didn’t look up. “You going to have a problem if I pursue River?”
When he didn’t reply, I waited quietly until he finished with the papers and finally looked up at me.
“She’s my daughter, Dom. I love her, and I don’t want to see her hurt again.”
I opened my mouth to talk, and Will raised his hand stopping me from speaking.
“I went to River’s for dinner, and she and I talked about a few things, including the two of you. When you and I worked through our issue yesterday, I told you her ex was an asshole, but I didn’t go into details, and I won’t. That is for River to share with you if she chooses. Because of him and his choices, she’s going to be more cautious. He embarrassed, and mentality put her through hell. I know she comes across as a woman who seems to have no problem handling herself, but, Dom, it’s a shield she has placed around her for years. River went from her mother, Jillian, and Alfred’s home, to one she shared with Thomas when they married after she graduated college. This is the first time she’s been on her own, and really living in the real world. Instead of the privileged one her mother kept her sheltered in.
“I don’t mean to dump this crap on you, but I think you need to know a little background. River’s mother, Jillian, was raised by her father. Her mother died when she was ten from complications dealing with pneumonia. Her father was a heart surgeon at the hospital. Jillian and I met in high school and began dating. When Jillian was preparing to go to col
lege, her dad was offered Chief of Surgery at some hospital in Connecticut. She didn’t want to move because of me, so we married. I was a new deputy then and making hardly any money. Oh, we were young and in love, so at first that didn’t bother Jillian, she even got a job as a bank teller to help. Within a year she was pregnant.
“After River was born, Jillian quit her job and stayed home because daycare would have eaten up her check anyway. We didn’t have a lot of money to spare, but she didn’t seem to mind. I was at work more than home because I would take extra shifts to pick up more money. The turning point was when her dad died in an automobile accident, and Jillian was his sole heir. River was almost five at the time. I came home one day, and Jillian asked for a divorce. To make a long story short, I didn’t see it coming, and it threw me for a loop. I didn’t fight her about taking River thousands of miles away from me when she said they were moving into the house her dad had own, and she had inherited. I just went along with it. Not long after they moved Jillian met Alfred and they married. Jillian sold her dad’s home, and River was uprooted again to Alfred’s house.
“My vacation time was spent going to see River because I believed Jillian when she said River’s life shouldn’t be derailed every summer to come here.”
“Will, what’s this about? Are you trying to tell me River is like her mom and she might get involved with me, but then bolt because I’m not wealthy,” I interrupted because I wasn’t sure I understood where he was going by telling me all this. And I wanted to because it would help me understand River better.
“God, no. River may look like her mother, but she is not even close to being like her. Jillian likes being the center of attention and having money to do anything she wishes. She enjoys the prestige she receives from being married to an attorney who is a partner in a large law firm. River never rocked the boat with anything her mother suggested. Birthday parties, a sweet sixteen party, a graduation party bigger than most couples’ weddings. It was ridiculous, and River really never enjoyed or wanted the lavishness. She would have been happy with a homemade cake and her classmates playing stupid birthday party games.”
Jag (Black Hawk MC Book 5) Page 7