by Amy Davies
“I am not her,” is all she says, before turning to walk back towards the house. God, I am a fucking knobhead right now. I turn and lean my arms on the car, drop my head, and take a few deep breaths. The pain that Rachel caused me is racing around my head and heart, and I am finding it difficult to breathe. I know Cassie wouldn’t intentionally hurt me, but seeing that bloke in there with her, hurt. My own fucked up issues have hurt Cassie, and I hate myself for that. All the times I got pissed at Dex for hurting Addy without speaking to her, and I just did exactly the fucking same. Jesus fucking Christ. I take one more deep breath before walking back into the house to find my girl.
I find her in the main room, where the Christmas tree almost touches the ceiling. She’s standing with a group of people, laughing at what the girl is saying, but her smile doesn’t reach her eyes like when she is with me. I did this to her. I have ruined her Christmas Eve. I need to change that. I need to make her smile. I walk over to where she’s standing.
I lean in and whisper, “I’m sorry. I fucked up.” I still haven’t touched her yet, for fear of her rejecting me. The group start talking again about some football game that is happening on Boxing Day, but I ignore them.
“You are nothing like her. You are everything. I’m sorry if I made you think or feel that I thought that,” I carry on my whispered apology. Her body shivers as my breath caresses the shell of her ear. I take a chance and slip my arm around her waist, pulling her closer to me. She lifts her gaze to mine, and we are locked in a silent conversation. My gaze drops to her mouth; her red lipstick makes her lips look fucking edible. She licks those lips, and I can’t stop the growl that leaves my throat. She does this to me, she brings the primal animal out in me.
“Did you just alpha-growl at her?” a tall redhead asks. I lift my gaze to her and smirk. “Holy shit, you did. Please tell me he growls like that when he is sexing you up, Cass.” I chuckle as Cassie buries her head in my chest. I tighten my hold on her, loving the feel of her against me. I can just imagine how red her face is.
“We haven’t actually slept together yet. We’re taking it slow,” I admit to her friends. They all look stupefied. Why are they shocked by this news? They look from Kitten to me and back again.
“Seriously?” I nod my head. “Cassie Dawson, are you telling me that you haven’t seen this God of a man naked yet?” My kitten pulls away from me a little and lifts her head to answer her friends.
“Yes. We both come with baggage so we wanted to wait until…” She stops herself from finishing the sentence. Wait until what? We haven’t talked about doing more, and believe me, my dick and balls really want more. My dick and my hand have become best friends over the past few weeks. I haven’t wanked-off this much since I was in school.
“Until what?” a younger lad asks. Yeah, I am not going to let my girl admit anything in front of these people. I take her hand and start to lead her away from the group.
“If you will excuse us.” I keep pulling her away from the group, and she doesn’t try to stop me. Thank fuck. We need some time alone. I head for the big white staircase that is covered in lights and fake snow-things.
“Down the hall. Third door on the right,” Cassie says from behind me. Damn, my girl read my mind. We reach the top of the stairs and a door opens, and out walks the muppet from earlier. He looks at us as he fastens the zip on his trousers. His smile widens when he sees Cassie, but I don’t miss the glare he sent me first.
“Hey, sweetheart, I lost you earlier. Where did you go?” I start to step in front of her, because I don't want this dickhead talking to my girl. Her hand wraps around my bicep, stopping my move.
“George, I would like you to meet my boyfriend, Jay Castle.” She introduces us and ignores his question.
“Boyfriend? Since when?”
“Since a few weeks ago, and don’t act like you don’t know because I know that you do. Now, if you'll excuse us, my boyfriend and I would like to spend some quality Christmas time together, if you know what I mean.” She whispers the last part. I chuckle as his expression. He looks mortified that we’re going to have sex. Little does he know that it won’t happen. Not that I don't want it to, because I do.
Holy shit I do.
“You can’t just leave to have s-sex, with your parent’s downstairs.”
“That’s quite funny that you would say that, George, because it was you offering to fuck my perfect round tits down in the kitchen earlier, was it not?”
“You what?” I growl at him, my anger spiking. The fucker straightens his back and smirks at Cassie and me.
“You have the perfect tits to fuck, sweetheart, and I will get to do just that one day. You wait and see.”
“Do you have a death wish, man?”
“Nope, but I do have very sexy dreams about our girl here. Just to give you a heads up, I will have her beneath me.” He winks and walks off. I lunge for him, but a large hand grips my forearm. I spin around to see a very well-groomed beast of a man. I look down to his hand on my arm and back up to his face. He is a few inches taller than me, but I can take him.
“He’s not worth it, Jay.”
“Who the fuck are you?” I growl.
“The name is Rich. I’m Chris’s boyfriend. And I will repeat again: that fucknut is not worth it. Plus, what the fuck would you do if you busted up your hands, huh?” Fuck, he’s right. I relax my body and step closer to Kitten, who is looking shocked and confused.
“Shit. You’re right. Thanks, man.” I pull Cassie into my body, breathing in her scent. “I’m sorry, baby,” I say into her hair. She pulls back suddenly and looks pissed.
“You have nothing to be sorry for. He is an absolute gremlin. He can bugger off if he thinks he is getting anywhere near this.” She runs her hands down her body, making my cock twitch and wanting to be buried deep inside her more than ever.
Maybe an early Christmas pressie for me.
cassie
We thank Rich and walk towards my bedroom. I know that Jay and I have said that we would wait, but I need to feel him against me. The way he defended me… it made me so bloody hot. My core is soaking wet with want and need for this man. I all but drag him into my room. I close the door behind me and lock it, before pushing Jay over to the bed. His eyes display the same lust for me as I have for him.
“Baby, you need to be sure about this next step, because once I feel that sweet pussy of yours wrapped around me, I am never going to want to stop.” My breath hitches, my lust bursting through my body, but his words hit home. I know I need to be ready for taking the final step with him. He reaches down and squeezes his penis through his jeans. I groan, and my core throbs for him. A thought enters my head, and I smile up at him. He narrows his eyes and tilts his head to one side, like he is trying to figure out what I’m thinking. I smirk at him and place my hands on his wide shoulders, and push him onto the bed. He chuckles and I bite my lip, causing the laughter to stop.
“Baby, you are on your last warning,” he mutters, arousal clear in his voice.
“Your warning doesn’t scare me, Jay Castle, but I will give you something to help with the little problem in your jeans.” I smile innocently at him.
“Little? I’ll give you little.” He grabs for me, but I step back out of his reach. I shake my head at him and step forward again, my knees between his legs. His lust levels go crazy when he sees my intentions. I lift my hands and flick open his belt, before popping open the buttons on his jeans. I slide my hands to the waistband and grip it. I can feel the material of his boxers beneath my fingertips, his warm hard skin under my knuckles. I start to pull the material down and Jay lifts his hips, helping me out. I bite the corner of my lip, and a growl escapes him. I pull them down over his hips, and I can’t stop my lips from descending onto his hip bone. Why is the ‘special V’ so flipping sexy?
“Baby, are you sure? We can wait.”
“Hush, Jay. I want to do this. Please, let me,” I say between kisses across his abdominal muscles. I stop
the removal of his jeans, and I count his abs with each kiss.
One, kiss.
Two, kiss.
Three, kiss.
Four, kiss.
Five, kiss.
“Baby,” Jay hisses out above me, but I don’t stop.
Six, kiss.
He has a complete six pack, and it is sexier than Chris Evans stepping out of the transformation machine in Captain America - and that is saying something. My man can blow any superhero out of the water in the sexiness department. I start to pull on his jeans again, needing to see what I want so desperately to see. His manhood pops out of the material when I finally move his clothes lower, and I gasp at his size. Yes, I have felt him hard against me when we have been kissing, but I have never laid a hand on him. Until now. He is huge, the biggest I have ever had, not that I have many to compare him to.
His penis is long and thick, the head a deep purple, pulsing with need. The thick vein that runs on the underside screams to be licked. Pre-cum is already leaking from the tip. I lean in and lick it, letting the taste of Jay Castle soak into my tongue. Jay groans but says nothing. I do it again, like licking my favourite lolly. I bend down further and run my tongue from root to tip, then suck the head into my mouth.
“Oh, God. So good,” Jay moans. My body vibrates with need for this man, but tonight I want it to be about him. For defending me. He has no clue how turned on I got when he stood up for me. I suck harder, concentrating on the head of his dick. Yeah, I said dick.
”Baby, I love it when you say dirty words for me.” He chuckles while his dick is in my mouth. Holy hell, Batman, I said that out loud, again.
I drag my teeth over the sensitive head and Jay hisses. Then I lick it once more, soothing any pain I may have caused him. I grip his dick at the base and slowly pump up and down. Jay’s hips lift from the bed slightly, causing the head of his dick to press against my mouth. Parting my lips, I take his length into my mouth, while keeping up the slow movement of my hand. I move so that I’m hovering over his body more, so I can take his full length into my mouth. I slide my mouth down until he hits the back of my throat, and swallow, feeling my throat tighten around the head of his dick. His hips buck off the bed, forcing himself further down my throat.
“Fuuuuuuck. Bloody hell, woman. Why didn’t you tell me that you have no gag reflex?” I suck as I pull my mouth back up his length, and let him slip from my mouth with a pop.
“Do men like that then?” I say as sexy as I can, but no clue if it actually worked. I keep up the slow pumping.
“Like? Fucking hell, Kitten, men - me - I love it. You can suck me off anytime you want. Just saying.” He winks at me before he lays his head back down on the bed. I kiss his inner thigh, before licking him from root to tip. I open my mouth and suck hard, and start to pump faster.
“Oh God,” he growls. “Yes, like that, baby. Oh, I’m gonna come.” I get into my rhythm. Jay is moaning, his hips hold a steady pace, sliding his dick in and out of my mouth. My saliva is running down his shaft, because I can’t suck it back quick enough. My black lace knickers are doing nothing to stop my arousal from leaking down my thighs. I squeeze them together to slow the ache I’m feeling there, the feeling that Jay Castle seems to be a master at making happen.
“Oh fuck, yessss,” Jay hisses. I twist my hand as I pump, knowing he is close; I can feel his thigh muscles tensing up. We are both lost in the sexy action, when…
“Cassie. Cassie, are you in there?” A huge knock bangs on my bedroom door and Chris’s voice booms into the air. I suck in a breath and almost choke on Jay’s dick. I start spluttering as the handle on the door rattles. I snap my head to the door and then back to Jay. He is now resting up on his elbows, smirking at me. Oh no!
“Chris, buddy, piss off. I’m getting the best blowjob of my life in here. Come back later,” Jay yells through the door. A loud choking noise comes from the other side of the door.
“Umm, Jay. I have Stuart out here with me. He was also looking for Cass.”
My dad.
OH. MY. GOD.
Heat rises up my chest and neck, and engulfs my face. I have never been so embarrassed in all my life. I climb to my feet and step away from Jay, burying my head in my hands as the tears start to build. How am I going to be able to look my father in the eyes again? Oh God, he will be so ashamed of me. The feel of Jay’s hands on my upper arms, startles me. My head snaps up, locking eyes with Jay. He looks just as mortified as me.
“I-I’m so sorry, Kitten. If I had known, I wouldn’t have said anything.”
“You shouldn’t have said anything anyway, Jay. God, he is my best friend. How am I supposed to look at him? And my father…” My voice rises, my anger trying to break through. I do not ever lose my temper. I am always calm and collected.
“Honey, open the door.” My dad’s voice comes from the other side of the door. His tone is even, not giving me an inkling of what he is feeling. Jay steps around me and walks to open the door for my dad and Chris. I turn to face them, and I am surprised to only see my father standing there, looking between Jay and me.
“Dad, I-.” He holds his hand up to stop my words, and I suck in a breath, the fear building. My heart is racing, and I am expecting it to fly out of my chest and land at my father’s feet.
“How old are you Cassie?” my dad asks. His question shocks me. I glance at Jay, and he looks as confused as I do.
“Twenty-five,” I mutter, and look down at my feet.
“So, you aren’t a child?” I shake my head. “I believe that my only daughter is not a virgin.” I shake my head again. My past sexual experiences were pretty bad, so I try to forget them.
“Stuart, I think-” Jay starts to speak, but my dad cuts him off.
“Cassie, you are old enough to know what you want in life. You are old enough to know that if you like Jay that much, then you are going to have sex. Fall in love. Do not ever be ashamed of having a healthy sex life. Hell, look at me and Mum.” My head snaps up, and I see my dad smirking at me.
“Oh my God. Did you…? Ewwww, Daddy.” He and Jay laugh.
“What? Oh, honey, we still go at it like rabbits. We may be old, but be we aren’t dead yet.” He winks at me.
“And now really disturbing images are running around my head. Thanks, Dad. Oh, my God. The visual. I need eye bleach. STAT,” I say to the room. Jay and my father laugh at me, but seriously, how can they laugh at a time like this? I cannot have the images of my parents going at it like energizer bunnies in my head. Oh, the poor bunnies.
“Okay, I will go and leave you kids to finish up what you were doing. Cassie, make sure you come back downstairs and see your grandmother.” He steps close to me and kisses the top of my head. I love my dad, but right now I need him to leave so I can set my eyes on Jay and remove the God-awful images in my head. I shudder and my dad chuckles as he steps out of the room. Christmas music becomes loud and then fades as he closes the door behind him. I keep my eyes closed, trying to erase the thoughts my father put in my head. I know my parents are very flirty with each other, and I love that. They are always touching in some way or another. From a quick kiss to touching each other as they walk past, and I love it. I want that.
Warm hands on my arms startle me, and my eyes snap open to see Jay towering over me. His smile is warm yet flirty. He leans in, without words, and lays a gentle kiss on my lips. I fall a little more for this man. My scarred walls are crumbling. He is adding little knocks to it to make it break away so he can slip inside and take a hold of my heart. I pull back from the gentlest kiss I have ever been given, and I hate to end it, but I need to.
“I needed that,” I whisper.
“I know,” he says, just as soft as me. I rest my head on his chest and Jay wraps his arms tighter around me. I breath him in and imprint his scent to memory, because we never know when things will be snatched away from us.
“Let’s go downstairs before they send a search party for us and add to the embarrassment.” Laughter comes from
above me and I pull back a little to see his face, amusement glinting in his eyes.
“Come on, you have to admit it was really funny. Your dad is a riot.” He laughs and pulls away, taking my hand before leading me to the door.
“Not funny, Jay. What would you do if you had to picture your parents having sex? To imagine them bumping-uglies.” He stops in his tracks, and takes a deep breath, before turning his head to face me. The look of sadness is in his eyes makes my heart break for him. I know what he is going to say next.
“My parents are dead, Kitten.” I suck in a breath and walk behind him. I slide my hands around his middle, and rest my head on his back.
“I’m so sorry, Jay.” I fight to hold back the tears. I could never imagine what it would be like to lose my parents.
“It was years ago. I was really young. It’s fine, let’s just go and join the party.” He doesn’t wait for me to say anything, he just pulls me from the room, our hands gripping each other like our lives depended on it. I want to say more. Ask more. But I feel like he doesn’t want to talk about it. Or does he not want to talk about it with me? Does he not trust me enough to tell me? We walk downstairs and join my family and friends. Jay is full of tension, but he’s hiding it well. Me… Well, I am being quiet and people-watching. Jay is laughing and joking with my friends as we sit around the table. Chris keeps looking at me with concerned eyes, but I shake my head at him, this is not the time to explain. To explain that I feel like I am not good enough for Jay. If I was, surely he would talk to me about his family. I look out the window and see frost has started forming on the ground. The chatter around me fades as I let my thoughts run away from me.
“Let’s go,” Jay mutters, taking my hand and pulling me to my feet. I am stunned into silence as he leads me away. He takes me back upstairs, and ushers me into my room. He points to the bed and says, “Sit.” So, I walk over and sit, my feet obeying before my brain can process. I sit and watch as Jay closes the door and locks it. He turns to me and lets out a heavy, defeated sigh.