“It’s them I don’t trust.”
“I don’t trust them either,” Adam said, knowing as he said it that trusting General Thompson was exactly what he was doing. He had agreed to go on this mission on the belief that Thompson would keep up his end of the bargain.
I don’t trust him. Not really. But what else can I do but operate on the assumption that he’s telling me the truth?
“Why are you going along with what he wants?” Ella asked. “Did he threaten you?”
Adam hesitated. He had implied, though he hadn’t promised, that he would tell her tonight what he and Thompson had talked about. And it felt strange to keep secrets from Ella. The two of them were a team. How could she play whatever role she needed to play if she didn’t know what the long-term plan was?
But how can I get her hopes up when I might fail?
He couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t let her get excited about the possibility that she and Julie might soon be free. If he didn’t accomplish his mission, she would be heartbroken, and that would destroy him.
So he told a half-truth. “He said he’d kill me if I didn’t comply.”
Ella said nothing, just squeezed his hand tighter.
“I don’t think he wants to kill me,” Adam said, unsure whether that would be reassuring or not. “But you’ve seen how he is. He goes right to the most intense option.”
Ella nodded. “He’d do it,” she said quietly. “Thompson doesn’t make idle threats. I can tell that about him. If he says he’ll do something, he’ll do it. If there was any hesitation in his mind, I don’t think he’d even bring it up.”
“I know,” Adam said.
“And you really won’t tell me where he’s sending you? Or when you’ll be back? Anything?”
“If everything goes well, I should be back in a few days,” Adam said. “Maybe a week, at the most. You’ll barely notice I’m gone.”
“Don’t be stupid.”
He was quiet for a minute. “Spend time with Julie,” he said. “Thompson already knows you’re related, so there’s no reason to worry about keeping your distance for appearance’s sake. Maybe you can even get some face time in with the kid, get a feel for how brainwashed he really is. I know Julie fears the worst, but it might not be that bad. Kids are resilient.”
“You have a plan, don’t you?”
“Maybe,” he said. “Maybe I have the beginning of one.”
She nodded, and Adam was grateful that she hadn’t asked him what it was.
“Adam?” she said.
“Yeah?”
“This is dangerous, isn’t it? Whatever he’s asking you to do is dangerous. If it wasn’t, he would be doing it himself.”
“It’s not like that,” Adam said. “It’s that he thinks I’m the only one who can do it.”
“What kind of sense does that make? These are trained soldiers. What can you do that they can’t?”
“I can not freak people out,” Adam said. “He wants me because I’m unthreatening. Because I’m not intimidating.”
“He doesn’t know you if that’s what he thinks,” Ella said. “I’ve seen you be plenty intimidating.”
“You’re just trying to buck me up.”
“You caught me.”
He scooted across his cot, close enough that he could drape his arm around her and pull her to him. “It’s all right,” he said. “I think it’s going to be fine. And you know I wouldn’t lie to you. Right?”
She hesitated. “I’m ninety-nine percent sure.”
“I wouldn’t lie to you.”
“But you would keep things from me.”
“I’m just trying to look out for you,” he said.
“You could look out for me by being honest with me.”
“You want honesty?” he said. “I think if anybody else knows where I am, Thompson will consider that a threat to his organization. I’m afraid if he finds out I told you, he’ll do something to you.”
“Maybe he doesn’t mind if I’m in on it,” Ella suggested. “He did let me see the bomb.”
“I know,” Adam said.
“But you still think it’s better that I don’t know?”
I think it’s better if I don’t do anything to test General Thompson right now. It was hard to hold on to hope that the man planned to keep his word to Adam. He might be eager to grab at an excuse to break his promise.
If Ella’s dead, I’ve got no reason to want to save Julie, he thought. Thompson knows that. I don’t want to leave without Julie, but if it came down to it, I would. He won’t want to kill Ella, not without provocation. That would be bad for morale around camp. It would make people question him. But if I divulge information without express permission to do so…
Would it be enough of a reason? Would Thompson use it as an excuse to remove Ella from the picture?
He couldn’t be sure. And he wasn’t going to take the risk.
They lay there in silence for some time, fingers entwined, and Adam had the strange feeling that they were the only two people left in the world. Even though they were on a base with thousands of other people, even though they were sharing a tent with several others, somehow none of that seemed real. Everyone else was an obstacle, a piece that stood in the way of his happiness. The only thing that mattered anymore was Ella.
“If we get away from here,” he said, “where are we going to go? Do you have any ideas?”
“Anything would be better than here,” she said.
Adam nodded, even though he wasn’t sure. He had made his decision, and he was secure in it—he wanted to leave this militia behind him. He wanted no part in what Thompson and his men were doing here. But would anything else actually be better?
They would be alone in the world. Again.
And who knew what else was out there?
Were the Birkins and the McTerrells really any better than this? he thought. They were violent and crazy too, and they probably would have killed me if I hadn’t run away. And what about Cody’s yacht? That was extremely precarious. I was lucky to survive.
Ella seemed to be following along with his thoughts. “Dying would be better than staying here,” she said.
“Don’t say that, Ella.”
“I’m not saying it’s what I want,” she said. “Of course I want to live. I’ll fight to live. But these people…they killed my sister’s husband, Adam. They’re monsters. I can’t stay here and help them build their new world. That can’t be what the rest of my life is about. I’d rather die.”
He didn’t know what to say. He pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her, taking comfort from the fact that, for the next few hours, at least, nothing could come between them. Nothing could tear them apart.
She breathed in deeply and tipped her chin up to look at him, and suddenly Adam was deeply aware of just how close she was. Had the two of them ever been this close before? He didn’t know. He was so used to sleeping in shifts, to sitting awake while she slept. Had they ever even lain down together before?
Her face was moving closer to his.
Is she going to kiss me?
Was he going to kiss her?
Her lips drew him in like gravity. She was inevitable.
Then she turned away.
Adam pulled back. “Is everything all right?” he asked, concerned. Had he crossed a line he shouldn’t have crossed? There had never been anything but friendship between them, and he didn’t know exactly what he was feeling now, except that it was powerful. She felt like the center of the universe to him all of a sudden.
“Everything’s fine,” Ella said quietly, resting a hand on his chest. Was she holding him away from her? Or was she inviting him in with her touch?
“I’m sorry,” he said helplessly.
She shook her head. “It’s just…you’re leaving. And I don’t know if you’re coming back. And I can’t…not when everything’s so uncertain. Not when I might never see you again.”
Adam understood, then. She was holding herself back
to protect herself.
She’s smarter than I am.
He hadn’t held himself back from her.
And now he realized that if something were to go wrong—if Thompson were to hurt her in his absence, or if something happened on his mission that prevented him from coming back—it would destroy him.
“Just tell me you’ll come back,” Ella said. “Tell me I’ll see you again, even if it takes longer than you’re anticipating.”
“I promise,” Adam said.
She rested her forehead against his chest and breathed deeply.
“I promise,” he said again. “No matter what happens, I will find a way back. Just have a little faith in me. I’m not going to abandon you here. You and I are going to find a way out together.”
She nodded. She must have known he couldn’t guarantee anything, with the future as uncertain as it was. But she didn’t seem to want to press the matter. It was as if they were silently agreeing to let the worst go unsaid, to imagine that they lived in a world where people could promise each other things and the future could be guaranteed.
Adam wondered if he would ever live in a world like that again.
For all he knew, getting away from General Thompson and his militia would do them no good at all. For all he knew, gaining their freedom would just leave them wandering around in a deadened world, searching for food and trying desperately to survive. Maybe there was no hope anywhere. Maybe it didn’t get any better than this.
But at least we’ll be together, he thought firmly. Wherever we go from here, as long as I accomplish what Thompson wants me to, I’ll have Ella by my side.
The world was an unforgiving and terrifying place now, and Adam had no idea whether he could carve out a life for himself that was worth living. But he wouldn’t be alone. Having Ella by his side had already made so many things infinitely more bearable.
It will be better, he told himself firmly. Everything would be better when they got away from here. He and Ella and Julie and her son would be a little family unto themselves, and finally—finally—Adam would feel that everyone around him was trustworthy and safe.
He just had to get through the next few days first.
I just have to threaten the president of the United States with a nuclear bomb, he thought wryly. Should be no problem.
Chapter 12
They came for him at first light.
Ella was feigning sleep when they arrived. She had stayed up with him all night, just as unwilling as Adam was to let any of what might be their last moments together slip away. As he rose from his cot, he gave her hand a last squeeze.
I promise I’ll come back, he thought, hoping she would somehow understand what he was trying to communicate. I promise I’ll get you and your family out of here. Stay strong while I’m gone. Take care of yourself. Wait for me.
She didn’t move, of course, and didn’t answer, but he felt her answer his squeeze with one of her own and hoped it meant she had understood.
Colonel White and Lieutenant Briggs were waiting for him outside the tent. Adam hadn’t seen either of these men since he’d been brought to the militia’s main base, and he’d half forgotten that they were the ones who had captured him and brought him in in the first place. It hadn’t occurred to him that they would be the ones to make the journey to Omaha with him, and his heart sank a little at the prospect. He wasn’t fond of either of the two men, and he didn’t think they liked him very much either.
“Are you ready?” Briggs asked.
“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Adam said, trying not to let the tension he felt show in in his voice. He wanted them to think he was calm and confident, that he had no doubts about what they were going to have to do. If only.
Briggs and White led him to a Humvee, and Adam climbed in without being asked to do so. The more he cooperated on this mission, he thought, the easier the journey would be.
They set off. Adam fixed his eyes on the floor of the vehicle, not wanting to look out the window and see the landscape they were passing. He didn’t know exactly what he would see if he looked, but it would certainly reflect the terrible traumas the world had been subjected to over the past few months. There might be corpses. There would certainly be a dearth of living humans.
He just didn’t want to think about it.
Instead, he turned his mind to thoughts of Ella, waiting patiently for him to come back. He missed her already. He couldn’t believe how wrong and unnatural it felt to be away from her. They’d been together for such a short time, but he had already learned to depend on her so greatly. Being without her now was like losing a limb.
“Breakfast?” Briggs asked, reaching into his backpack and producing some granola bars.
Adam accepted one wordlessly. He didn’t want to take anything from these men—he didn’t want to communicate with them at all—but it would be moronic to deny himself food. He tore the wrapper off the granola bar and ate quietly.
They had been driving for only about half an hour when the Humvee pulled to a stop and White got out.
Adam looked up in surprise. They weren’t in Omaha yet. They couldn’t have even left California. What was going on?
Briggs rested a hand on Adam’s arm as if he knew Adam would be restless. “Stay in the car,” he said quietly.
“What’s going on?”
Briggs didn’t answer. He reached under his seat and produced a gun.
Adam felt a chill. He hadn’t known that was there. He had assumed the soldiers were armed, of course, but seeing it was different. They were armed, and he was not.
Briggs got out of the car too. Adam itched to join them, but he remembered what Briggs had said. Stay in the car.
He swiveled in his seat and looked out the window.
Three men were standing on the side of the road. They wore dirty-looking uniforms, and they too carried guns, but they didn’t look anywhere near as healthy and fit for duty as Briggs and White did. They were pale and emaciated, and one of them looked like he was nursing a broken rib.
Are they going to give those men food? Adam wondered. Or maybe they’re going to put them in the car so they can bring them back to the base with us and add them to Thompson’s army? That would be complicated—they had a long journey ahead, and this Humvee would be fairly crowded with six men. But it would be nice to be able to help someone.
Then Adam heard the sound of a weapon being cocked.
The noise sent a thrill of fear through him before he even understood what he was seeing. The three men had all raised their hands in what was obviously surrender. Adam could see that one of them was talking fast, even though he couldn’t hear what was being said.
White had his weapon aimed at the men. Briggs stood back a little way, hand on his own gun, clearly waiting to be called into action.
Adam’s thoughts felt frozen.
Then it came—the sound of three quick gunshots.
The men dropped in their tracks.
Briggs stepped forward and quickly and efficiently stripped the men of their weapons and bags. After a pause and a quick conferral with White, he also removed the boots from the victims’ feet.
Adam sat shaking like a leaf. What the hell? What did those guys do to deserve that? They were completely harmless! We’re in a tank, practically, and they were just half starved and walking along, no threat to anybody. Why the hell would White shoot them?
He was about to scramble his way out of the vehicle and start demanding some answers, but White and Briggs were already on their way back. They climbed into their seats and White turned the key in the ignition. Before Adam could get his wits about him, they were on their way again.
Neither White nor Briggs said anything about what had just happened. Adam sat in stunned silence for a few moments, sure they were going to speak up and explain it to him, but they didn’t. Finally, he couldn’t hold back any longer.
“What the hell was that about?”
“What was what about?” Briggs asked.
&n
bsp; “Seriously? Those men! Those men you killed. Who were they? What had they done?”
“They were US military,” White said, as if that explained everything.
“I thought you were US military,” Adam said faintly. “You told me you were Army when we met.
“Ex, I said,” White corrected. “I don’t consider myself a part of the Army anymore. None of us do. And none of us consider ourselves as belonging to the US Air Force or Marines either. We’re not under the command of the president. Those guys…they still recognized his authority.”
“So you killed them?” Adam said. “Just because they recognized the authority of the president? It wasn’t like they could do anything to us. They were just three guys on foot! We could have driven right on by!”
“Are you going to make a problem out of this?” White asked.
“How can I?” Adam countered. “You two have all the firepower. I can’t start anything with you.”
White nodded. “I’d shut my mouth, then.”
“Or what?” Adam asked. He felt as if a spark had lit somewhere in his gut, giving him the courage to finally say some of the things he’d been thinking. “You can’t kill me. General Thompson needs me to negotiate with the president. Are you really going to turn around and drive back to base and tell the general there was no meeting because you decided to shoot me for sassing you? What do you think he’s going to say to that?”
White didn’t answer, but Adam saw his jaw clench.
Briggs spoke up. “It’s not just about whether or not they could take us in a fight,” he said. “You need to start coming to terms with the fact that this is the end of the world, Adam. The usual rules don’t apply anymore. We can’t just live and let live. Those guys had guns and shoes without holes in them. They had backpacks full of gear. Now we have those things.”
“And they’re dead,” Adam said.
“I know,” Briggs said. “I don’t relish that. But at the end of the day, if it comes down to me surviving or someone else surviving, I’m going to choose myself every time. And once you realize that, it becomes a little easier to kill someone else to take what you need. Resources are finite. No one’s making new shoes anymore. The only way to get a new pair is by taking them off another man’s feet. You understand?”
Escape The Dark (Book 4): Caught In The Crossfire Page 9