Ihave to work with you and show you what to do. I want you and your ship outof here in half an hour."
"Who's going to make us?" Bullard asked with great originality.
"I am."
Everybody turned around to see who else had entered the conversation. Itwas Hansen. "I'm going to give you fifteen minutes, not thirty," Hansensaid. "Then I'm going to turn the grid power on at full intensity. You caneither use it to take off, or sit around and roast alive inside your ship."Candle turned and looked at Hansen with new respect. "Okay ... Let's goback to your place. I've still got some things to figure out."
Quemos was on the verge of hysteria. "You're bluffing! You wouldn't dare.I'll report this!"
Fifteen minutes later, the ship headed for space.
* * * * *
Back in Hansen's room, the two men ate a quick lunch, then sat at the tableand talked about Candle's plans for opening the reluctant door. "The way Ifigure it," Candle said, "I think that we can handle the whole thing byradio. Which reminds me, one of these days I'm going to build a telescreenthat will transmit and receive through pseudo-met. Not too difficult reallyif you approach the problem--"
"I better get Fromer for you," Hansen said hurriedly.
"Fromer here," said the bass voice.
"This is Candle. Let me talk to one of your so-called engineeringofficers."
"Who the hell--"
"Shut up and go get 'em," Candle growled back. "And one more yelp out ofyou and you'll stay in that ship till you rot."
There was a pause, then Fromer again, a meek Fromer. "My chief engineeringofficer is with me."
"Okay. Now get this. Come to think of it, you'd better record it. Numberone: By now you know which component is a worm gear. You will notice, I'mquite certain, that it engages a large notched wheel. The reason that thedoor will not move is because at the point where the two gears meet, someof the metal has oxidized. For possible use in future emergencies, I offerthis explanation. The entire mechanism is subject to periodic vacuum, whenthe airlock door is operated. In between times, the mechanism is in theship's atmosphere. A condition of lower oxygen content thus obtains aroundthe sealed off area, and such an area is anodic--in other words, corrodiblewith respect to the surrounding areas in which oxygen has free access. Now,since this door has opened and closed successfully for about five hundredyears, it appears that there's a special reason why it suddenly refuses tofunction. At a guess, you would experience this condition of intensecorrosion only when the aluminum in the wheel gear is exposed to somethinglike sodium hydroxide, and only at the point where it controls the wormgear. Now, has this ship landed recently within such an atmosphere?"
"Three weeks ago on Ghortin IV," said the weak voice of the engineer. "Welanded to get some pictures of the cloud formations for souvenirs. Wedropped on the edge of a large body of water because the view was better--"
* * * * *
Candle shook his head sadly and said, "You could have avoided troubleby coming in over the land instead of the water. The heat from theship boiled the water which undoubtedly contained sodium carbonate andcalcium hydroxide; presto, and the air was filled with clouds of sodiumhydroxide.
"I suggest that you steer away from all such wicked places in the future.Of course, if you'd learn how to mine ore, smelt metal, machinecomponents--"
"First they'd have to discover fire," Hansen said out of the corner ofhis mouth.
"You're catching on, son," Candle said, out of the corner of his mouth."Now, gentlemen, to open the door it will be necessary to break thecorroded area apart. This is a large heavy mechanism, as such things go.Since you have no tools heavy enough to batter the corroded area apart,you'll have to make some."
"How can we?"
Candle sighed. "I wish I had time to teach you to think, but instead,you'll have to do as I tell you to do. I think you can probably make abattering ram out of water. You just--don't interrupt--find or make a longcylindrical container, fill it with water and quick-freeze it in yourrefrigerator--"
"But they put R'thagna Bar in the refrigerator again--"
"Then I suggest you get him the hell out," Candle said.
An hour later ten men smashed a half-ton cylinder of ice against thecorroded junction of the two gears. Following Candle's instructions, theynext applied the ram to the door itself, which smoothly swung open. "You'llfind," Candle explained, "that the only damage will be the two missingteeth on the aluminum gear. Since only two teeth are ever in contact at anytime, you can simply slide the gear forward and engage it at a point wherethe teeth are intact. You'll find, I'm quite sure, that your door willfunction properly. Also, Captain, don't pull out of here until I'm aboard.I think I'd like to bring an assistant along, too."
"An assistant?" Hansen asked.
Candle twirled the ends of his long white moustache. "You, my lad, if you'dlike to go along." He pulled a letter from his pocket and fanned the airwith it. "I'm in complete command of this expedition--at least until HisExalted Excellency gets home to plant his seed."
* * * * *
Hansen's face glowed. "I can't think of anything I'd rather do. Let's get acouple of messages off to Sector Headquarters and get on board ship."
"It may not be any joy ride," Candle said thoughtfully. "You probablyhaven't heard about it, but there've been a number of ship emergencies inthe past few weeks."
"Door failures?"
"No. At least none that I've heard of. But at least two Hegler drives havestopped working in mid space."
"But, but there's nothing to stop working--"
Candle's eyes twinkled. "No moving parts, eh?"
Hansen reddened. "I hope I've outgrown that silly notion."
Candle peered into Hansen's eyes. "I'm sure you have. I'm sure that youwill find out a lot more things for yourself. You're the kind. And we'regoing to need a lot of your kind, because failures--failures of so-calledperfect mechanisms--are becoming more and more commonplace." Candlepointed to the emergency light on the traffic control panel. "That lightwill be flashing with more and more frequency in the months to come. Butnot just to signal trouble in space. If I were a superstitious man, I'dthink that the age of the perfect machine is about to be superseded by theage of the perfect failure--mechanical failures that can't be explained onany level. I have several friends who've been in touch with me recentlyabout--"
"You think that it's time for a change?"
Candle smiled quickly. "That's the idea. And the truth of the matter isthat I _am_ a superstitious man. I really believe, childishly, that themechanics and motions of the galaxy may turn themselves upsidedown just tosnap man out of his apathy and give him some work to do."
* * * * *
Upsidedown turned out to be a good word. They boarded the big ship an hourlater and were respectfully ushered into the presence of Captain Fromer andhis staff.
"We're underway," Captain Fromer said. "We'll be landing in nine days todeliver R'thagna Bar home."
"How is he?" Hansen asked.
Fromer shrugged. "He's been thawed out, frozen, and thawed out so manytimes, it's anybody's guess. Take a look for yourself."
Someone pulled back a curtain to expose the recumbent, thawing, steamy formof His Exhalted Excellency R'thagna Bar.
"Why's he undressed?" Hansen asked.
"Funny, now that you mention it," Fromer said, puzzled, "why _is_ heundressed?"
"Fascinating! Damnedest thing I've ever seen," Candle said.
"What's so fascinating?" Fromer asked suspiciously, moving closer.
"His belly. Never saw anything like it. Those black squares keep appearingand disappearing. If I've ever seen a truly random pattern--"
"It started right after they froze him the first time," Fromer saiddisconsolately.
"Fascinating, by Heaven," said Candle, who was now down on his hands andknees. "Look at that top sequence! Random, yet physiological. I've got afriend on
Bridan III who'd trade anything for some photos of this. Get mesome photo equipment, will you?"
Captain Fromer ran his hands through what was left of his hair. "Get himsome photo equipment," he said to no one in particular, "and somebody makea truce with that idiot doctor long enough to get me a sedative." Aboutthis time the ship turned upsidedown.
"But
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