She had no idea. Neither she nor any of the women she lived with had gone inside. Who knew how long it’d been since Sylvia had been in there. “We’ll have to find someone to take care of it.”
“I’ll have someone come out here tomorrow.”
“No. It’s all right. I’m sure we can find someone easily.”
He tipped her chin up with his finger. “It’s my responsibility, remember? We’re the ones renting it for you.”
“Oh.” She coughed lightly. “Right.” It made sense, but she was still discombobulated from everything that had happened. Why was everything so awkward?
He watched her and frowned. “Is everything all right? Are you sure you aren’t injured?”
“I’m fine. Just shaken up a bit, I guess.”
At her admission, he pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her so her head leaned against his chest. She expected to hear a steady, calm heartbeat, but was surprised to hear the opposite. She leaned back slightly so she could see his face. “Why is your heart racing?”
He gave her a self-deprecating smile. “I think it should be obvious.”
She wished she knew what he was talking about. “Apparently not.”
He sighed, pulling her against his chest again. “I was worried for you. Things could have gone bad quickly. Really bad.”
The danger didn’t seem so large now that it was over, but had the wasps attacked her, stinging her repeatedly, she knew she could have died. She didn’t say that, though. Instead, she ran her hands up and down his back in a soothing rhythm. “Everything’s all right. We’re both fine.”
She squeezed her eyes tight, hoping it would help block everything else she was feeling, everything she wanted to say. She tried to hold part of herself back, to not fall completely in love.
But how could she stop herself from doing just that when everything he did, everything he was, was what she’d searched for her whole life?
He was the one for her, there was no doubt in her mind. As she stood in his arms, basking in his care, in his concern, she wanted to unleash her feelings. But she couldn’t. Not when she wasn’t sure if he returned them—or if he could ever return them.
So, she stood in his arms, trying to enjoy the moment, the way he held her, the way he felt against her, the way he smelled.
Because it might be all she ever had of him.
Chapter 9
Max exited the mine, frustration written in every step he took. He swiped his hand across his forehead, but it only smeared the thick, black coating on both surfaces. As he stormed toward the wash stations, men scrambled out of his way, slipping in the mud as they went.
It would almost be comical if Max had been in a better mood.
He started with his hands, attacking the skin with rough, unscented soap.
“If you keep that up, you won’t have any skin left.”
Max didn’t even bother hiding his glare. “And you know this from experience?”
Chase Eversley, his partner, leaned against one of the wooden posts, his arms crossed in front of him. “Oh, I manage to get dirty now and again.”
Lucas McDermott, the other Copper King in Promise Creek, snorted as he walked over. “Don’t listen, Max, he’s gotten dirty plenty.”
Every one of the partners knew how hard Chase worked, both in the public eye and out. However, Max still liked to rib the man. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll believe it when I see it.” He continued scrubbing his arms without looking up.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Chase and Lucas give each other a look, and Max threw his soap in the water, his patience completely spent. “What is it? Is there something the two of you would like to say?”
Chase whistled, and Max had never had the urge to strangle someone as strongly as he did then.
Lucas rocked back on his heels. “We heard reports that you were a bit harder to work with today. We thought we’d check in and see how things are going.”
Max grunted, picking up his soap. This really wasn’t anything he wanted to discuss. “There were more mistakes than usual, ergo, more problems to annoy me.”
“Mistakes happen.”
Max bit his tongue. He was surly, but he could admit he’d been harder on the men than he needed to be. “I’ll lead with a lighter hand tomorrow.” He hoped that was enough to pacify his partners.
“That would be good. I’d hate to have to hire more workers,” Lucas said. “Especially when we lose them to bad moods.”
Max scrubbed his face, hoping it would cool his temper as well. When he was finished, he toweled off. “Look, I already said I’d do better tomorrow. What else do want?”
Chase shrugged and stood up a little straighter. “We want you to tell us what’s really going on. Why did you come in today acting like you’re ready for war?”
Max’s jaw clenched. This was the exact thing he’d been trying to avoid. “Considering it has nothing to do with the mine, it’s none of your business.”
Chase didn’t seem ruffled at all, as if Max’s surliness had only rolled off him. But Lucas frowned. “We’ve always seen eye to eye, Max. Out of everyone, I’ve understood you most. But I don’t understand this. We’re your partners, and when it affects the operation, whatever you’re dealing with is our business too. But we aren’t asking as your partners right now. We’re asking as your friends.”
Some of his aggression dissipated, and he looked at the two men he’d worked with, had strategized with, and had gotten to know, with clear eyes. They may not have spent the most time together as they’d each done their part to make their business succeed, but it was enough.
As Max remained silent, Chase said, “You don’t have to speak with us, if you don’t want to. We’re not forcing you. But we thought a listening ear might help with whatever you’re dealing with. I know I’ve needed one a time or two.”
And just like that, the rest of Max’s frustration, his indecision and fear, melted away, replaced by pure exhaustion. He turned and leaned against the water trough, his body sagging under the emotional baggage he’d carried since deciding to court Charlotte.
“I don’t know how you guys do it.”
At his words, the men exchanged another look. “Do what?” Lucas asked.
Max blew out a long breath, raking a hand through his filthy hair. “Everything, honestly. How you handle being here, falling in love, settling down.”
“It wasn’t easy,” Chase said. “But it was the best thing that ever happened to me.” He cocked his head and looked at Max with fresh eyes. “Is that what’s going on? I’ve noticed you’ve been spending more time with Miss Hayer.”
Max could lie, but what was the point? Most everyone knew he was courting her. Besides, he didn’t want to deny it. “I’ve been courting her,” he explained.
“I see.” Lucas frowned as if uncertain how to feel about it. “And something happened?”
He knew everything that had happened between the two of them wasn’t life-altering to anyone but himself. But the other day, when she’d been in the shed, bees swirling around her, threatening her, it had almost been more than he could take. As much as he’d tried to hold himself back, to keep a piece of him locked away, to spend time with her and just enjoy her without falling in love, it hadn’t worked. He’d done the one thing he thought he would never do. He loved Charlotte.
And it terrified him.
He cursed and looked away.
Chase smirked. “That doesn’t look like nothing.”
Max wanted to hit the man, but what would that accomplish? It might give him temporary satisfaction, but it wouldn’t relieve the fear budding in his heart. Finally, he shook his head. “How are you able to trust your wives so completely?”
At his question, both men awkwardly paused. Finally, Lucas cleared his throat. “I can’t speak for Chase, but for me, that wasn’t a problem. I don’t know how much you know about my past, about what had happened between Abby and I, but it was I who needed to earn her trust back. Not the other w
ay around. I can’t say how I managed it either. I was luckier than I deserved.”
Max knew a little bit of their situation, but instead of asking a follow-up question, he looked to Chase. “What about you?”
He rubbed the back of his neck, as if deciding what to say. “My situation was somewhat similar to Lucas’. I didn’t have a hard time trusting Lily. It was something I felt from the beginning. However, it took quite a while to convince her to be with me.”
Great, Max thought. Was he the only man who struggled in this way? He shook his head and turned back to the water, scooping large handfuls into his hair. “I feel like such an idiot.”
Chase settled back against the post. “Love makes fools of us all.”
Max grunted in agreement. Because no matter what happened, he definitely felt the fool.
Lucas cleared his throat. “Let me ask you this, Max. Some believe trust is earned, and some believe it is given until a person proves unworthy. I don’t know which you practice, but if you’re the first, has she done enough, shown you enough, to put your faith in her?”
“Yes.” Max didn’t need to think twice about it. Everything Charlotte had done showed him she was a good and honest person. He might fear the same thing that happened with Crystal, but he knew Charlotte would never intentionally set out to hurt him, never throw him over for a better catch. It just wasn’t in her nature. “She’s a good person.”
Lucas nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly. “She is. Now, with the second option, that trust should be given until a person proves unworthy—has she done anything to show she can’t be trusted?”
And at Lucas’ words, a lightness filled Max. Lucas was right. Trust was earned or given, but in both circumstances, Charlotte deserved his trust. “She’s never done anything to break my trust.”
Lucas didn’t look surprised. “Then what’s the problem?”
Ashamed, Max looked away. “The problem isn’t with her. It lies within me.” He hated speaking about this, hated that it made him look weak, but he felt he owed it to his friends. “A woman duped me long ago. She made me fall in love with her, and then ran off with my best friend.”
Chase straightened away from the pole and cursed soundly. “No wonder you’re struggling. No one would have an easy time after that.” He looked at Max with pity.
But instead of being offended, Chase’s defense of him and the discussion they’d had, soothed Max’s soul. “Exactly. But Charlotte doesn’t deserve that. I just don’t know how to get past it.”
Lucas rubbed his jaw. “I’m not certain this is something you can get over. It sounds more like one of those things you have to get through. Leap and then trust. Can you do that? Is she worth it?”
Was she worth it? Absolutely. There was no doubt in his mind. But even knowing that, fear struck his heart.
As if reading his thoughts, Lucas said, “I guess that’s something you’ll have to decide. If she’s worth it, take the leap, bet everything on the relationship. If she isn’t…” Lucas shrugged as if the rest were obvious—walk away.
Knowing he needed a moment, Chase and Lucas left Max to his thoughts. He appreciated what his friends had said, the advice they’d given him. But what they’d suggested, for him to trust and leap, was madness.
Or was it?
The alternative was to leave Charlotte, and he knew he couldn’t do that either.
He was a mess. There was no denying it, no hiding from it. He was a complex, knotted, mess.
But if he didn’t leap, if he didn’t take the chance, he knew what his life would be like—bleak, desolate, and utterly alone.
Chapter 10
The sun was already up and the morning gone as Charlotte scrubbed tears from her eyes and pushed herself up from her bed. She couldn’t do this anymore. Couldn’t live like this, couldn’t hurt like this.
She thought she’d be able to court Max and at least maintain a friendship with him, but now she saw how impossible it was. She wasn’t capable of removing her feelings or keeping them hidden away.
This person, the one who’d cried almost every night and morning in her room wasn’t who she wanted to be.
Things needed to change, but she didn’t know how to change them.
She stood from her bed, blowing out a slow stream of air. The movement helped, calming both her mind and her body before she got dressed and headed out of her room.
She went down the stairs, hearing voices in the sitting room. Now or never, she thought, and headed straight for them.
All the women she’d known since coming to town where there, even Abby and Lily, who had married and moved out. She shouldn’t be surprised though, they were always there when she needed them, and she was grateful for that.
The minute she stepped in, Abby noticed her and shot to her feet. “Charlotte, what is it?” She went over to her and took her hand.
Charlotte’s lip trembled at the kindness, but she straightened her back and refused to let any more tears fall. “I need your help,” she said then looked out at the rest of them. “All of your help.”
Lily came to her as well. “Of course. Why don’t you sit and tell us what’s happened?” Lily was the practical one of the group, and Charlotte had never been more grateful for her pragmatic nature. Her brisk tone and the way she efficiently led Charlotte over to a chair did more to calm her than anything else.
They all settled down to hear Charlotte’s problem, and for the first time in quite a while, she didn’t feel alone anymore. She shook her head. “I don’t know why I didn’t come to you all sooner.”
Grace reached over and took her hand, squeezing gently. “You know we’re always here for you, no matter how long it takes.”
Charlotte nodded. “I do. I do know that, and I’m so grateful for you all.”
Emery gave her an encouraging nod. “Tell us what happened.”
She sighed, momentarily overwhelmed. “I don’t even know where to start.”
Hannah looked at her directly. “From the beginning.”
It should have been funny, but Charlotte couldn’t find any humor in it now. “Well…” She held out her hands. “You all know Mr. Blackgate is renting the apartment above the bakery. Everything was fine—great, even. He’s a good tenant, quiet as a mouse.” She let out a soft laugh. “He was gone before I got there in the morning and didn’t return until I left.”
Charlotte didn’t miss the look Abby and Lily sent each other as if they knew exactly what had happened. If anyone could understand, it would be them. They’d both been through it, had fallen for their own Copper King. Charlotte tried not to be envious of their happiness, of the way things had worked out for them, but it was hard.
At her pause, Emery said, “I take it that changed?”
“It did. I started to get to know him little by little. Just small things at first. Like what his favorite cookie was, his schedule, how logical he was.” Now, it seemed so funny, even with her tortured heart. “I wouldn’t have thought anything of it. And things might not have progressed had he not helped me when I needed it.”
Hannah frowned, concerned. “What happened?”
As she looked from face to face, she realized she’d never told the others about the break-in. She winced. “Someone broke into the bakery. There’s been a few other minor things that have happened. Nothing major.”
“Why wouldn’t you tell us?” Lily asked point-blank. “It couldn’t have slipped your mind.”
It had, in fact. “At first, I didn’t want to worry you, and then things became more complicated with Max, and it fell to the back of my mind.” She held up her hands. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t intentionally keeping it from you.” She shrugged. “At least not after the first little while. I just didn’t want to worry you.”
Grace squeezed her hand again before releasing it. “We’re friends. We are supposed to worry. We could’ve helped you.”
Abby got her attention. “Did you tell the sheriff?”
“Yes. He’s aware of it. He came
in and did a sweep of the place. But no one knows who it was or what they wanted. I’m hoping it was just a one-time thing.”
The others looked uneasy, and she didn’t blame them. She was still uneasy herself, but that wasn’t what she wanted to talk to them about. She waved that away, wanting to go back to the root of the matter. “Max found me right after it happened and stayed with me. He helped me. And he’s done other things too. He helped in the shop one day when I needed an extra hand.” The ghost of a smile curled her lips, just remembering it. She hadn’t thought he’d be able to do it, but he’d done a perfect job. “After that, I brought him a basket to thank him, and it sort of became a habit.”
Lily nodded. “I heard you’d visited the yard a few times, but I didn’t know why.”
“It was to see Max. We just grew closer, were pulled toward one another. Then he asked to court me.”
The women were silent at Charlotte’s pause, but when she didn’t start speaking again, Hannah held out a hand as if not understanding. “Then what’s the problem? He’s courting you, you like him, he seems to like you. I don’t understand.”
“The problem is something happened in his past, something that makes it hard for him to trust people,” she said carefully, making sure not to divulge any information Max would want kept private. “He was very upfront about it, laid out what had happened. I knew this would be difficult, but I truly thought I’d be able to hold part of myself back, not get too attached. I didn’t know it could hurt this much.”
Understanding lit upon all their faces, especially Abby and Lily. They looked at her with sadness. “You love him,” Abby said. It wasn’t a question.
Charlotte’s eyes pricked. “I do. I tried to keep my feelings under control. I didn’t want to fall in love with him when he might not ever be able to feel that way about me.”
“It doesn’t work like that,” Abby said sadly. “I understand that more than most. You can’t control your heart. You can’t control who you love.”
Charlotte sniffed, nodding. She knew that now, had learned it the hard way. “I know. But now I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I think things have changed between us, but then other times I feel like we’re back in the same place we started. We don’t seem to be moving forward or progressing at all.”
Western Future: Copper Kings - Book 3 Page 8