by Nana Malone
That slice of pain clear across my middle burned. God it hurt so bad. "I'm sorry, Rian. I'm sorry for what happened last night. I'm sorry you were scared. I'm just, I'm sorry for all of it."
"I just wish none of this had to happen, Ollie. I wish we were in a place that we could talk to each other. Trust each other. But we're not. Everything that's happened has been because of that night five years ago. And I just—" She glanced down at her feet and picked at her fingers. "I just don't think we can get past it. I wish we could. I really do. I want to pretend that none of this matters and none of this is real, but I just can't. All of this is just too hard."
"I hear you. I understand. And for what it's worth, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you got caught up in this, and I'm sorry I didn't just bloody tell you the truth. I didn't think I could."
"And that's a little matter-of-trust issue, isn't it?"
"Yeah, it is. And I guess we never found ours."
She shook her head. "I guess we never did. But Ollie, I want you to know that even if we're not, you know, a thing, I still want you to be safe. And careful. I know I don't have any right to tell you that, but please, please, please be careful. Whatever you need to do for Tessa, whatever you need to do to get free of Max, do it and be free because I think that you've always deserved that. That joy that you talked to me about that night you came over. How happy you were. How it was like breathing again. I want you to have that."
"Maybe one day we can start over."
"I hope so. But until then, I'll see you at work."
I was all twisted and knotted up because all I wanted to do was reach for her and hold her and keep her with me, but she was like water in my hands slipping through the crevices and the cracks until there was nothing left. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to make it better, how to change things. I had been playing games and messing about, and she'd been that girl, the one who walked away and never looked back. And maybe I'd seen her wrong. But either way, she didn't deserve this life, she didn't need it. So the right thing to do was to walk away. I just wished to Christ it didn't hurt so much. "Yeah, I'll see you at work."
And then all I could do was stand on the stoop and watch as the woman I’d started to love opened the door and walked in. Shutting me out of her life for good.
With my heart well and truly broken, all that was left was to close the Rome loop.
The sooner I resolved things with him, the sooner I could go back to my life… without Rian. Like that had any appeal. Wherever Max was, he must be having quite the laugh.
Rome’s choice of venue was interesting. I would have thought he’d want to meet somewhere more secluded. Quiet. Without prying eyes. But as I sat down at the bar called Speak Easy in the heart of London, I was surrounded by those running to happy hour, ready to get their tipple before dinner.
There were a few people in suits, but it was mostly artists and musician types, emulating the pub’s trendy vibe. Many of the patrons reminded me of someone with so much money they didn't know what to do with themselves. I tried desperately to pull my mind off of Rian.
I knew when Rome arrived because the hairs at the back of my neck stood at attention. Like the menace he put off was palpable.
Before I could even make a move, I was flanked by two very massive men.
In the mirror behind the bar, I could see them. Tall. Large. One of them mixed race, the other white or maybe Greek. He did have an olive tone to his skin. Neither of them had necks. Both had shaved heads. Had it not been for their difference in coloring, you could have easily called them twins. They had that same kind of meaty look to them. The shift in the seat next to me made me angle my head to glance over. Rome DuPont.
He wasn't exactly a small man, but he was mostly unassuming. He had that sort of a neat-as-a-pin look to him. Not a hair out of place. I didn't know him personally, but I'd seen him several times in the old neighborhood in Peckham as the police had to release him after an arrest because they didn't have enough evidence. I'd seen him from a distance. Max was always saying that Rome was the biggest dick in Peckham. And you didn't want to get into competition with him. But up close, while I understood the vibes, he seemed, again… unassuming. I waited for him to speak, but he didn't, as if he was content to let the weight settle between us.
"Are we going to do this or what?"
He chuckled to himself as the bartender, seeming to know his drink, brought him something that looked like a gin and tonic. That was basic for Speak Easy.
"My, my, you are eager, Mr. Wexler. In a hurry?"
"Ah, well, I have a roast in the oven. Potatoes and everything. The faster I do this, the faster I get to go eat."
Another chuckle. "You know, your brother never said you were so funny."
"Didn't he? Oh, shame. Listen, are we doing this, or are these lads going to drag me out and beat the shit out of me again and tell me that my brother's debts are my debts again?"
He shrugged. "It depends. Do you deserve that beating?"
"I didn't deserve the first one. What Max does is none of my fucking business."
"Aren't you your brother's keeper, Mr. Wexler?"
"I'm not. I don't have anything to say to him. Nothing of consequence. I hope he never darkens my door again." I slid over the flash drive. All the information he wanted from Colton Cox was on there.
"This was not the deal, Mr. Wexler. You are either to deliver me the million quid or Colton Cox's phone, or your sister Tessa dies. Why is that so difficult?"
I shook my head. "Now, you and I both know threatening my sister at this juncture is a recipe for disaster. For example, if I was in fact my brother's keeper, it would stand to reason that my brother has taught me a thing or two. So this information on the flash drive gives you everything you wanted off Colton Cox’s phone. But I could have made a copy of this and given it to some other twat who loves to pinch things. I'm sure someone somewhere can make use of the information on this. That's of course if you don't want it. I’ll just sell it to the highest bidder. Why would I walk into a room with you and not be prepared for the worst to happen?"
"Tsk, tsk. Making a copy wasn't part of the bargain."
"No, it wasn't, but it was me looking after my back knowing that lads like you would come in and try to change the terms of the deal. That's not what we're doing right now. Besides, I saved you a step so you don't have to get your own hacker."
Rome took the flash drive and handed it to one of his goons. "Give this to Remy. She's in the car. Have her check the data."
Wow, okay. So they did actually hire their own hackers. "Just be aware, if I don't make a call in thirty minutes, that copy goes on the black market."
Rome chuckled. "Well, well, aren't you a dark horse? It seems you're more into this than your brother. Smarter. I always wondered how Max could think of such elaborate schemes. Now I realize that wasn't Max at all. You were the brains behind some of his bigger scores, weren't you?"
I shrugged. "Now, now, I'm not the type to kiss and tell."
Rome chuckled. "Well, hot damn, if you are ever looking for employment, I might be hiring."
"I make it a point not to work for anyone who threatens to harm Tessa, so thanks but no thanks."
"You think you would have a choice?"
"Again, the clock is ticking. You know this information has a shelf life, right?"
"And you think I won't hunt down your brother?"
"I think if you had time, you would have hunted him down. I was the shortcut. You can kill me, or Max, but you're not getting Tessa. So take that information and do with it what you will and let's call ourselves even."
He turned fully on his stool and studied me. "Ollie Wexler, you do have a set of brass ones on you."
"And you better remember that before you think of anything else to harm my family again.”
Rome’s goon returned to the bar and nodded, and Rome said, "It seems, Mr. Wexler, that our business is complete. Go home and spend some time with the people you love. After all, isn�
��t that what life’s all about?"
Leave it to a gangster to remind me that this line of work was dangerous. "Excellent. Remind your boys for me, would you? If I get another whiff of one of them near me or my loved ones again, I will be their worst nightmare.“
“Noted. You have a good day, Mr. Wexler."
"Yeah, you'll forgive me if I don't wish you the same."
I downed the rest of my drink and then stood up to go. I hadn't been bluffing. Liam and Alex had the secondary drive, and they'd take it to East if something happened to me.
Once I walked out of Speak Easy, I could feel the tension leaving my shoulders. The last two weeks had been hellish. Stressful. That constant feeling of dread that followed me around whenever Max had pulled a job, that’s the kind of feeling I had. When I was young, it was almost like I was playing one of my video games. I could plan out all the stuff far removed from where anything really happened. None of it felt real until people started getting hurt. Except now that I was grown, I knew what was happening, and I didn't like the stain it left on me.
Colton Cox, no doubt, was a piece of shit. I could almost guarantee it. But I didn't like how easily I'd robbed him. How quick I'd been to drop everything I had worked so hard for to do this thing.
Maybe that's who you really are.
I texted Liam and Alex right away.
Ollie: So far, all clear. I'll confirm when I'm home.
But as I took the cab to Camberwell and then stepped out in front of my flat, knowing it was empty and cold and sparse, I instead made a right toward the block of flats around the corner.
Maybe she was home.
This is dangerous. You see her and you’ll start thinking about that kiss.
I should turn around and go home. It would be the easier thing to do.
But I kept walking. And when I reached her door finally, I knocked. It took her a moment to answer the door. When she pulled it open, she blinked in surprise.
"Oh, God, what now?"
"I, uh… I don't know why I'm here, honestly. I should have gone home, but I couldn’t stand the way we left things.”
“Ollie,” she said, backing away. “This is a bad idea.”
“I know.”
“There is still so much…” her voice trailed.
I advanced on her. When her back hit the wall in the foyer, I crowded her, planting both my hands on the wall on either side of her. “I’m sorry. I can’t stay away from you. I wish I could.”
I couldn't breathe. And thinking was definitely off the table. My dick had locked my brain away in a dungeon somewhere, and I was pretty sure he was never giving the key back.
At first, the raw need took over, and I knew this was the beginnings of a screw. A dirty-screw at that. Against a wall… with both of us desperate.
The thing about denying yourself something for so long was that all your self-control was wasted on staying the fuck away from it. So when you were finally having it, you gorged like a fucking animal. That was the only way to describe the way I kissed Rian.
It was raw, animalistic. I was trying my damnedest to eat her whole. I wanted my tongue on every inch of her, my teeth nipping at her flesh. I wanted my kisses to erase all others that came before me.
I pulled her to me then yanked up the material of her fitted skirt. I didn't have the patience to fuck with zippers, and as impatient as I was, she'd be leaving here with a shredded skirt if I tried to remove it. I lifted her off her feet with ease. "Wrap your legs around me, Rian."
For once, she complied without a fight, and I hissed in a breath as my dick slid against the lacy material of her thong.
Rian rotated her hips. "Ollie. I..."
Her words trailed off as I nuzzled the column of her throat and backed her up against the wall. I would never get enough of her scent. It was like her skin was kissed with jasmine. I had to get inside her. Maybe if I could just take the edge off, everything would be all right.
With my hips bracing Rian against the wall, I tried to remove the delicate buttons of her shirt gently, but I was too impatient, my hands too clumsy. Ripping the silky fabric was not my intention, but satisfaction rippled through me as the fabric parted.
Her tits beckoned from behind her demi-cup bra as they strained against the lace fabric. I could see the hint of her dusky nipples peeking through the lace.
I lifted her higher then dipped my head so I could take one tight peak into my mouth. Against her skin, I mumbled nonsense words about how beautiful she was. How good she tasted. All the while, Rian writhed in my grasp, rolling her hips against me to no avail.
“Jesus, Ollie, please,” she moaned out as she grabbed a fistful of my hair.
I released her nipple and lifted my gaze to meet hers, my vision hazy and my throat tight with need. “I’ll go slow next time. But right now I just need—”
“Yes, God, hurry up. I need you.”
This was out of control. I was out of control. There was no way I’d be able to stop. She tried to roll her hips over me, but I gave her arse a quick tap with my palm, and she gasped. “Didn’t I tell you not to move?”
Rian sputtered out a laugh. "Did you just tap that ass?"
And just like that, the fear, the tension, the desire to run all evaporated and a laugh came rushing out of me. "Woman, I'm trying to get myself under control. If you would just—"
She shook her head and relaxed her neck muscles before reaching for my cock and gripping it firmly. "You think too much."
With one simple stroke, she had me at her mercy. She guided me to her entrance, rubbing the tip against her slick folds. "Please, fuck me. I don't want to wait. I promise I'll torture you in some other way later. Right now, I need you inside me."
My cock jerked in her hand, and she pumped me again. I'd gone from being totally in control of the situation to being at her mercy. When the tip of my cock nudged her slick opening, she hissed and my damn eyes crossed. She felt too damn good. So soft, so smooth. Smooth? When had she had time to do that?
"Rian?"
"Ollie, please."
"Hold on tight."
Her grip tightened on my shoulders. "Like this?"
"Fuck, yes, just like that." My gaze was drawn to the flush of light red on her brown skin. "Did you like it when I spanked you just now?"
"I—"
I did it again.
Rian moaned low, and I knew I couldn't let this girl go. At least not without leaving a piece of myself behind. The head of my cock slid into her easily, and my body vibrated with pleasure. Home.
She was so tight. I could feel every pulse, every contraction of her sweet, velvet sheath. I was too connected to her now. Too bonded. The breadth of emotion made me want to blurt out that I loved her, but I couldn't think about that, couldn't deal with it right now. So I focused on the lust, on the need.
I withdrew gently, inch by inch, and Rian moaned low. "Faster."
But she wasn't in charge anymore. She'd given me the reins. When she wanted them, I'd be happy to hand them over, but right now, like this, this was my show. I nipped her shoulder. "No, Rian, just like this. A slow quickie. You don't get to come unless I tell you."
Between pants, she tried to reason with me. "Not. Fair. I. Need. Just."
And that settled that.
My lips stayed occupied with hers as I reached into my pocket for my wallet. There was much fumbling as Rian was quite insistent on helping. In the end, we managed to get my coat and my shirt off, my belt undone, and my trousers halfway down my legs. As for her clothes, all I managed was to tear her blouse completely off and tug her bra down as I made quick work of the condom.
I pinned my gaze on hers as I gripped her hips and sank into her. I watched as her dark eyes went wide and her lips parted on a soft, "Oh."
Retreating slowly, I ground my teeth together before sinking into her again and again. Dipping my head to hers, I kissed her softly, even as my hands removed her bra. Her breasts were gorgeous, full and high, with dusky-dark nipples. As I held
the weight of both of them in my hands, I rolled her nipples under my thumbs.
Rian scored her nails over my shoulders with each slow thrust. And with each retreat, she moaned my name. And as I fucked her slowly against the wall, I knew the truth. I had been on a collision course with Rian for this very moment.
There wouldn’t be any ‘just taking the edge off.’ There would be no mental separation from this. Rian Beaumont would force the emotion into me, force me to feel everything. There would be no hiding my emotions from this woman. Ever. Especially not like this.
But that didn't stop me from trying. I broke the kiss and buried my nose in her neck again, keeping my pace nice and steady. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to focus on the physical feeling, but it was impossible with her whispering in my ear. She was close, so close to an orgasm, and the swell of pride and possessiveness in my heart was too much to ignore. She felt like mine.
"I… oh my God." Her groans grew louder and louder, and I kissed her again, trying to drown out the sound. Kissing her was like coming home. And there was no going back. She was under my skin. She was already changing me.
I broke the kiss and whispered against her soft lips, "Come for me, Rian, come around my cock. I need to feel you. I need this. I need you. We’ll go slow next time I promise. Just let me make you come." The truth of the words struck me deep, and I couldn't control the spread of warmth and the bolt of electricity that charged through my dick. As I started to come, Rian threw her head back, her release hitting her simultaneously.
She milked me and locked me deep inside her, refusing to let go of her captive. In that moment, I knew she'd own a part of me forever.
I was in fucking trouble. After what had just happened, Rian was this close to fucking owning me.
Who the hell are you kidding? She already does.
Rian unwound her legs from around my waist, and I set her down gently. On wobbly legs, I made quick work of cleaning up.