“Ye called me shameless.”
Kai rubbed his hand over his face and hair. The lady made a fair point. “What I intended to say was bold. You often act too bold for a woman.”
“Bold?” She took an innocent tone. “My father was a Highland warrior, my mother related to the English queen…”
“Wait,” he said. “I thought Laird Jamie’s mother was a cousin to the queen?”
“Aye. Our father’s married half-sisters.”
Kai nodded in understanding. “So, because your mother had noble blood flowing in her veins, you blame her for your rebellious nature?”
“I doona blame her for anything! I praise her. Humbly thanking her every night as I pray for gifting me with a strong mind and heart.”
One of the guards brought Kai a bowl of stew and a wineskin. He eyed the empty space beside Miran, momentarily hoping she’d invite him to sit. But he thought better of it. Best to keep some distance between them for now. Instead, he chose a nearby, snow-covered boulder and wiped the wet away with his gloved hand before he sat down.
“And what about yer lineage, Prince?”
“I am no longer a prince.” He tasted the stew.
She chuckled. “Did ye forget about me? For years I attempted to hide my birthright, pretending to be a servant. I dressed and acted the part perfectly. And people who visited our castle often mistook me for a common lass. Twas easier that way.”
“Easier than what?”
Her eyes widened. “Accepting the loss of my parents.”
“For that I am truly sorry, Miran.” And he was. Pain darkened her features then, the kind of pain that never goes away. It got buried deeper, but it definitely didn’t fade, not with time or even immeasurable happiness.
Kai knew the bite of loss. The loss of his infant brother and sister, the deaths of beloved cousins, servants, pets, and now, the death of his once beloved father. Maybe it was harder to mourn his father who still lived but had died spiritually. “What do you miss the most about your father?”
“His laughter,” she said.
“And your mother?”
He heard the tiny sob escape her lips, and wanted to comfort her. But if he acknowledged having heard it, he might do more harm. Better to ignore it.
“She died when I was very young.”
He opened the wineskin and took a deep drink, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
“What about yer mother? Do ye miss her?”
Her sudden interest in his life surprised him, for Miran had always cursed him, never asking after his personal affairs. “Nearly every night after most are abed, I go outside and gaze up at the stars. I imagine her doing the same, for we did so when I was a boy. She would point to the brightest stars and teach me their names. The heavenly bodies have always been a point of deep curiosity for me.”
He watched as she leaned back and gaped up at the nighttime sky. The half-moon was ringed by clouds, but dozens of stars were visible.
“Do we see the same stars here as ye saw in Constantinople?”
“Yes.”
“Mistress.”
Bloody hell… Kai found it hard to believe Cadha interrupted so many of their conversations by accident. In fact, he was beginning to think she was spying on them and purposely cutting their time short to keep him from growing closer to Miran. If the maid persisted, he would speak with her. As far as he was concerned, he’d made progress with Miran, experienced a sweeter, more trusting side of her tonight.
“Aye, Cadha?” Miran asked.
“Captain Kai has informed me we should be ready to leave at daybreak. If ye wish to get a full night’s sleep, we should retire now.”
“Verra well.” Miran stood. “I bid ye good night, Captain.”
He stood out of respect for her, waiting until the women disappeared before he claimed the stool she had been sitting on. He finished his cold stew, then drank a fair portion of wine.
“Can I join ye?”
He welcomed the company of Colin, his second-in-command. Not only had the man demonstrated great skill with a sword and bow, he’d earned Kai’s trust. “Yes.”
“We’ll reach the next village in a few days. I thought ye should know I have a cousin who lives nearby. He has a small farm, and I am sure ye and Lady Miran would be welcome at their hearth.”
“As will you, Colin.”
“Nay,” the soldier said. “I prefer to keep watch.”
“You will be expected to at least eat with us. I will not deprive you of what I am sure is a long overdue visit with your kinsman.”
“Thank ye, Captain Kai. The reason I suggested it is to give ye and the lass some time together. Tis my job to watch over ye, and the old hen hasna escaped my attention. Cadha doesna care for ye much. Aye, she respects ye as a leader and protector, but she doesna want ye near Lady Miran. And if I’m no’ mistaken, Laird Jamie wishes ye to marry his cousin.”
He rewarded the soldier with the rest of the wine in his skin. “Drink, the night air is cold.”
Colin nodded and drank greedily.
“Do ye have a wife and children, Colin?”
“Nay. Though my Da and Ma wish me to choose a bride. I am their only son, and with two younger sisters, their only hope of a grandchild any time soon.”
“A man needs children to complete him. A wife to comfort him as he grows old.”
“I am but twenty seasons, sir. Most men I know prefer to wait.”
Sometimes the differences between the Scots and his own people were startling. “A man your age in Constantinople might have two wives by now and half a dozen children.”
Colin spit out the last gulp of wine he’d taken. “Two wives?”
“Aye. Four is acceptable if you possess the wealth to support them equally.”
Colin rubbed his bearded chin. “I canna say the idea of bedding a different lass every night isna exciting. But when I think about the kind of jealously twould cause in the hearts of the women—I doona like it so much.”
“Wise beyond your years.”
“Did ye leave behind a wife and children?”
“No. But I was betrothed.”
“Ye must grieve her loss.”
“I never met her. But from what I understand, she was a striking woman, and there would be no lack of suitors for her.” Only once had he thought about Rayha, and that was on the ship many years ago. “This place has given me a second chance.”
“There’s magic all about us, sir. Anything is possible in Scotia.”
“Magic?”
“Aye, wee creatures, fairies, and selkies.”
“Not God and his angels?”
“Them, too.”
“Then the Highlands are vast enough to offer a home to all celestial creatures.”
“Every sort of man resides here,” Colin said. “So why no’ a mix of mythical beings. I may no’ be as travelled as ye, Captain, but I have seen a fair part of this world, listened to men speak from the heart about what they put faith in and what they consider mere superstition. Once ye’ve seen a bare-footed bairn shivering and starving in the middle of winter, his young ma a widow with no place to lay her head, ye might understand why so many of us believe in magic.”
“I would never question your faith, Colin, or ridicule you for worshipping a different god than me. Variety makes the world an interesting place. Imagine if we were all the same.”
Perhaps he should take his own words to heart. Instead of trying to subdue his wild, Highland lass, he should enjoy the challenge she presented. Embrace her unpredictability, encourage her to fulfill her dreams. Nay. Her dreams were not the dreams of the average woman, that much he knew. Jamie had told him before she had wealth set aside by her father which would enable her to live independently once she reached a certain age. Kai would never allow Miran to strike out on her own.
As capable and stubborn as he believed her to be, to use Colin’s words, every sort of man resided in the Highlands. Good ones, of course. But Kai had seen fi
rsthand what one evil man could do, what he could destroy if given free reign.
Done with the conversation, Kai stood and stretched. Never in need of as much sleep as others, he would rest for a few hours in his tent, then secretly patrol the area outside the camp. Better prepared than caught unaware by any enemy.
“Who has first watch?” he asked.
“Maxwell and Kirk.”
Satisfied Colin would keep his men organized, Kai strode to his tent. Light flickered from inside; someone had lit the brazier for him. Though he’d been raised in the desert, the winter did not affect him the way it did his brothers. He preferred the cold. It made him feel alive and strong, whereas the simmering heat left him feeling lazy.
He closed the tent flap behind him and crawled between the furs. The only thing on his mind as he faded into sleep was Miran—he hoped she would join him at Colin’s cousin’s farm tomorrow night, away from prying maids, where he could kiss her again, maybe more than once.
Chapter Six
They reached a sizeable village just before sunset three days later, choosing a space adjacent to the river to set up camp. Miran helped the other women unload the cart and assemble their tent. Inside the shelter was six bedrolls, complete with pillows and furs, three braziers, and trunks containing their clothes. They’d spend several days in this village, hoping to find recruits for Jamie’s guard and perhaps a maid for his household.
After everything was set up, Miran washed her face and hands, then changed into a clean, wool gown, fresh leggings, and her second pair of leather boots. Cadha combed her hair out and braided it, weaving dark blue ribbons into the braids to match her dress.
“Are ye comfortable, mistress?” the maid inquired.
Miran gazed at her reflection in the round, handheld mirror another maid held up for her. “Comfort isna something I’d associate with a trip through the Highlands in the middle of winter, Cadha.”
The maid nodded sympathetically. “Can ye bear the accommodations? The food? The lack of civilized company?”
Miran turned around on the stool and glanced at her servant. “Even if I couldna, I’d never complain outside of this tent. The captain and his men must never think us weak.”
“The captain…” Cadha must have thought better of what she had to say, for she bit her tongue and then sighed.
“I understand ye doona trust Captain Kai,” Miran began, “but what grudge do ye have against the man?”
“I wouldna call it a grudge, milady.”
“Nay?”
“Tis safe to say we have a difference of opinion.”
“On what?”
“I am not at liberty to say, mistress.”
Miran frowned. “By whose command?”
“I canna tell ye that, either.”
Miran dinna like vital information being withheld from her, especially from her own maid. Unless… “Are ye a spy, Cadha?”
The older woman chuckled but quickly corrected her rude behavior. “My only task, my only purpose on this trip is to keep ye safe. I swear it before the Almighty.”
Miran stood, eyeing her servant suspiciously. How many times had she heard people swear on anything holy—God, their children, even the scriptures. It made no difference; if someone wished to lie, they would. “I doona know ye very well, Cadha. And we are stuck out here together, meant to look after each other. I am accustomed to taking care of myself, as ye well know. It is unnecessary for ye to follow me around all the time, worrying whether the captain or any of his men will take advantage of me.” She quickly knelt and lifted the hem of her gown, revealing the jeweled scabbard of her dirk. “I know how to use it.”
The maid lifted her eyebrows in obvious surprise and disapproval. “Ladies doona carry weapons.”
“Who said I was a lady?” Miran let her hem drop back into place before she stood again. “I wish ye to eat here. I require a bit of freedom tonight,” she said as she left the tent alone.
She paused just outside the canvas shelter to wait and see if Cadha or any of the other maids would talk behind her back. But after several minutes of silence, Miran was satisfied she had made her point and no one would challenge her authority over the women. Just as she was about to join the men around the fire, Kai approached her.
“Lady Miran.” He bowed casually, a smile playing on his joker’s lips.
“Captain.”
“We have received a formal invitation to dine at one of the finer farms just outside the village.”
“We?”
“Aye.” He stared at her as he always did, looking through her with those haunting, dark eyes. “You, me, and Collin. For our hosts are his cousins, so he must join us. And if you wish, you can enjoy the comfort of a real bed tonight.”
Anytime Kai mentioned a bed, it made Miran’s insides squirm. “Whose bed?”
He shifted on his feet, his smile growing. “A bed,” he emphasized.
“Not yers?” She dinna mean to say it.
At first, he dinna react, but then, as he often did whenever she spoke carelessly in his presence, he bellowed with laughter. “Sounds like a serious question. Is it?”
She folded her hands in front of her to stop the fidgeting. How could she have been so stupid? “Twas sarcasm, Captain, nothing more.”
He rubbed his stubbled chin. “If the inclination to share my bed ever causes you frustration, know you have an open invitation, Miran. Always.”
She’d never give him the satisfaction of surrendering to the growing attraction she felt for him. Would never admit it. Though, ye’d have to be a blind fool not to see it. Cadha had taken notice. And so had Helen and Jamie. Who else? All of Kai’s men? She gazed in the direction of the fire. “And how will we get to the farm?”
“Horseback, of course.”
“Is my mare saddled?”
“No,” Kai answered. “You will ride with me.”
“Excuse me?” Had she misheard him? She’d rather walk through hot coals than share a saddle with him. Maybe even be deprived of air or her freedom than give him an opportunity to hold her close to his sculpted body and grind his manhood into her lower back. Aye, she might be a virgin, but she knew very well why men liked to share a horse with lasses. She’d witnessed it before.
“Did I not speak clearly enough? Colin informed me the space in his cousin’s stables is limited, so we shall only take one horse. And I cannot risk leaving one of our mounts outside overnight. It could get stolen. Colin will ride back to camp after the meal is over.”
Feeling the pang of defeat on the inside, she managed not to let it show on her face. “It seems I have no choice in the matter. Unless, of course, I refuse to go at all.”
He cast her a challenging look. “You would show such contempt for Colin? Shame him in front of his kinsman? He took the time to ride ahead and make arrangements for your comfort. His cousin’s wife sent word she is looking forward to having such a fine lady in her house.”
Damn his foresight and self-righteous manner. Kai never failed to win. And it infuriated her to no end. “I would never intentionally insult anyone.”
Kai chuckled. “Except for me.”
She narrowed her gaze, remembering how many times they’d argued, how many times she’d disrespected him in front of others. For that she was truly sorry. “All right.” She was resolved to go.
“Good then,” he said, offering her his arm.
She accepted, resting her hand on his forearm.
“Colin is waiting for us over there.” He pointed beyond the firepit.
She walked with him in silence until they reached the horses. And just as he said, Colin was waiting for them.
“Good evening, milady,” the young soldier greeted her, bowing his head.
“Colin,” she said as Kai easily climbed atop his horse, then as if she weighed nothing at all, pulled her up in front of him.
She tried to get comfortable, her long legs dangling over the left side of the horse, her body as far away from Kai’s as she coul
d get.
“Miran,” he whispered. “We cannot ride like this, it will throw Gregor’s balance off.”
“Is he not yer warhorse?” The great beast was trained for combat. It would make no difference how she sat in the saddle. Kai only wished to force her to sit close to him.
“Aye.”
She twisted about to look him in the eyes. “I have seen ye ride many times while practicing in the field. Ye have nearly ridden upside down in the saddle, and Gregor never misstepped, or as ye say, lost his balance.”
Kai gave her an innocent look as he urged Gregor forward, following Colin. But then something came over him and his peaceful expression changed. He trailed his mouth along the line of her shoulder. And though she was wearing a fur cloak, she swore she could feel the searing heat from his lips on her skin. In fact, she jerked from the intensity of the contact between them.
“What if I simply admitted I want to touch you, Miran?” He dinna wait for her reply, and his arm snaked around her waist, holding her in place, as solid and heavy as the guilt she felt for pretending not to like it, not to like him.
“I dinna give ye permission to do this.”
“Would you have me take a chance and let you fall from my horse while we ride to the farm?”
She reluctantly shook her head.
“What would Laird Jamie do to me if one hair on your beautiful head was harmed?”
She trembled against him, losing the battle of wills in such close proximity to the man she couldna accept wanting. “Why did ye come here, Kuresh?”
His features grew stormier at the mention of his former name. “Never call me Kuresh again.”
“Why? Ye canna remove yer past, even if ye wish it away, even if ye live in denial as to who and what ye are.”
“The way ye have all these years?”
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