by Tammy Walsh
That was why it was important to be careful who you let into your strange little world.
Cleb was going to miss her.
I was going to miss her.
But it was best she was gone. It might hurt that she wasn’t here now but change always took a little time. Once the first day was overcome, the next would be much easier. And then the next, and the next, until eventually, I wouldn’t think of her at all.
I could tell myself that as many times as I wanted, but it still wouldn’t make it true.
I would never forget her. I would always remember her.
Now I had to begin again, had to start from scratch. I needed to become the guardian Cleb deserved.
A knock came at the door, tearing me from my thoughts.
“Come,” I said.
“Mr. Snix is here to see you, sir,” he said. “He arrived this morning with no reservation.”
“That’s fine,” I said. “Show him in.”
I needed something to distract me. Discussions about the new mine would be perfect.
The investor from the social event last night entered my study. He was a portly Titan with a bushy mustache that almost completely covered his lips.
“I hope I’m not disturbing you,” he said.
“Not at all,” I said, bracing his forearm in the traditional Titan greeting.
“Please come sit down,” I said. “Would you like something to drink?”
“No, thank you,” Mr. Snix said. “I won’t stay long.”
The chair groaned as he sat down. He rearranged his suit and held his hat in his hands—more for something to do than anything else.
“I felt I should tell you my decision in person,” he said. “It’s never nice to hear bad news. I’ve decided not to invest in your new mine. It sounds like a wonderful proposition and a real money earner. And there is no question of your ability in building or operating a successful mining operation. I feel very fortunate that you would consider me as an investor. But this time, against my better judgment and that of my accountants, I’m afraid I’m going to have to decline.”
It came as a bit of a shock. After all, we had worked together on other mining projects in the past and he always made an excellent return.
It wasn’t a major issue but it did put a bit of a fly in the ointment. Still, I knew I could find another investor. I had plenty of time and the building work hadn’t even begun yet.
“Can I ask why you came to this decision?” I said.
The investor ran his thumbs over the hat in his lap nervously.
“It’s of a… personal nature,” he said. “You see, my wife and I… Well, we haven’t been seeing eye to eye lately. In fact, we haven’t seen eye to eye since we got married. She always said I work too hard and I should spend more time with the kids. But now the kids have grown up and left and my wife is busy living her life and doing her thing… and now I’m slowing down, I have the time to spend with family… but now they don’t have the time to spend with me.”
I was looking at the shadowy reflection of myself, I realized. He was me… if I hadn’t met Bianca who changed my outlook on life and my work ethic.
“I just don’t have it in me anymore to work all the hours in the day,” he said. “Making money… it has lost its flavor somehow. I’m not sure how to explain it.”
“You don’t need to explain it,” I said. “I understand exactly what you’re talking about.”
Mr. Snix moved his eyes over my desk, piled high with paperwork. A visible relief came over him and his shoulders relaxed.
“Yes,” he said. “Yes, I suppose you do. We businessmen are very much alike, aren’t we? Perhaps we have the same issues and flaws. Our dedication to work, for one.”
Something occurred to me then.
“We’ve worked together for many years,” I said. “But we’ve never really sat down and gotten to know each other, have we?”
“No. That’s another issue with people like us. We don’t have friends. We have acquaintances.”
I chuckled.
“That’s definitely true,” I said. “I suppose we can never expect to get to know someone if we don’t spend time with them.”
“Which is what I need to do with my life now,” Mr. Snix said, slipping his hat back on his head. “Can you believe I have grandkids? I don’t know where the years have gone. I know their names and I could have a pretty good stab at their birthdays, but I don’t know anything else about them. Their interests, their dreams.”
“You’ll learn,” I said. “If you’re willing to give it time.”
Mr. Snix smiled, his lips curling into a hopeful grin.
“Yes,” he said. “I suppose I will.”
He groaned as he pushed himself up with his hands on his knees.
“Getting old sure isn’t fun,” he said. “Make sure to enjoy your youth while you’ve got it.”
I laughed as I met him on the other side of my desk.
“I’m not as young as I used to be either,” I said.
“But a damn sight younger than this old man,” he said.
I led him to the door as he hobbled toward it. I opened it for him. I felt compelled to say something, to give him a little hope.
“Not that you asked for it, but let me give you a piece of advice someone once gave me,” I said. “To have the kind of relationships you want with your loved ones, they don’t need your money or your business or your big house. All they need is for you to be with them sometimes. Just give them your time. That’s the magic ingredient.”
Mr. Snix smiled at that and nodded.
“Yes,” he said. “I can see how that makes sense. My wife did try to warn me this would happen but I have a thick head and never paid much attention.”
“All men are the same,” I said. “But keep trying with your family. They will find time for you eventually. Just approach the way you work to the way you want to spend time with your family and you’ll get what you want.”
He smiled that hopeful grin again.
“Yes,” he said. “I suppose you’re right.”
Waev offered Mr. Snix an arm to lean on as they approached the door.
He was a kind, old man. He was one of the first investors to give me my big break. And today he’d come with a warning echoed by Bianca.
Don’t become a workaholic again.
“Where’s Bianca?” a soft voice said.
I turned to find Cleb standing on the stairs, his tiny hand clutching the banister. He was so small and fragile. He’d already been through so much. I needed to protect him from all those who might wish to do him harm.
“What are you doing out of bed?” I said. “You should be resting.”
But his eyes were unyielding.
“I went to her room but she wasn’t there,” he said.
So, the time to have the conversation was already here. I knew it would need to happen at some point but I thought I would have a little more time than this.
I’d thought long and hard about what I would say. The words would taste like ash in my mouth but I had to do what was best for Cleb.
This is how I thought the conversation would go:
“I’m afraid she had to leave,” I would say.
“On a new mission?” he would ask, or words to that effect. “Will she come back?”
And then I would reply with: “Maybe. It depends on her next mission. The bad guys got too close this time. Now she needs to be very careful.”
Bianca had laid the foundation for the web of lies. I didn’t want him to have a sour memory of her, despite what she had done. I felt terrible I needed to add to them but they were what he already believed. If I was to strip it from him and then add that I had sent her away…
The damage might be permanent. There was little chance he would see her again. At least this way he might grow into a healthy young boy. He didn’t need this, not when he was so young, so fragile after his recent ordeal.
And one day, when he was a little old
er, I could tell him the truth. That she was never a spy. That she lied to protect herself.
I helped him down the stairs.
“Let’s go into the front room,” I said.
We walked side-by-side, my stomach churning as the sofa loomed up. He hopped onto it. I sat beside him.
Not so long ago, I would have sat on the sofa opposite, treating our time as more of a business meeting than a private discussion between boy and godfather.
I placed my hand on his narrow shoulders and offered him the best smile I could manage. I took a deep breath and began to roll through my rehearsed script.
“I’m afraid she had to leave,” I said.
Cleb tore his eyes from mine and stared at the floor between his feet. I could see the thoughts passing across his face. Any second, he would ask if she would come back.
Finally, he looked up at me.
“She was never a spy, was she?” he said.
And just like that, he blew all my preparations out the window.
“I… Uh… What makes you think that?” I said carefully.
Cleb shrugged his shoulders.
“I just sensed it, I guess,” he said. “And she knew the man who took us, didn’t she?”
Could Cleb read minds? Did he have a secret ability I didn’t know about?
Now what did I say? I had to think on my feet. Should I tell the truth? Or should I continue with the lies?
No, I decided. I wasn’t good at lies. The truth had to be enough. There were already too many lies.
“Yes,” I said. “She knew him.”
Cleb nodded and gently swung his feet back and forth.
“Then she really was a governess?” he said.
“Yes, she was.”
“She was the most fun governess I ever had.”
“I’ll try to find another governess like her,” I said, knowing there wasn’t another governess like her anywhere.
Cleb nodded. He didn’t look convinced.
“Why did she go away?” he said.
Yes, why?
“Because she lied,” I said. “She lied and you got kidnapped.”
“Oh.”
He frowned and kicked his legs harder.
“But it’s not her fault the bad man kidnapped us, is it?” he said. “We were happy until he came along.”
“Yes. But she led him here.”
“Not on purpose.”
“No, not on purpose.”
“Then it’s not her fault, is it?” Cleb said. “She was nice. She wouldn’t have brought him here on purpose.”
“No,” I said weakly. My voice was barely a croak.
“I should get dressed,” Cleb said.
He slipped off the sofa. He was about to turn and leave when he stopped and turned to me. He extended his arms to me. I leaned forward and he hugged me.
“It’s okay to be sad, Uncle,” he said.
“I’m not sad,” I said. “I’ve got you.”
“Yes,” Cleb said. “But you’re still sad.”
He planted a kiss on my cheek. It was the first time he’d ever done that and it made me beam.
“It was nice though,” Cleb said.
“What was?”
“Being part of a family,” he said. “Even if it was for a little while.”
“You were part of a family,” I said. “With your parents.”
“They weren’t at home much. They were out most of the time. When they came back, it was always late and I was asleep. They woke me up. They’d been drinking. I never liked the smell. You’re always at home but you weren’t really here either. I know you’ll be better now. And it’s thanks to her, right?”
I never knew what his home life had been like before. I assumed he’d had a happy upbringing. But how could he when both his parents were gamblers?
“Right,” I said. “It’s thanks to her.”
In his face, I saw the love and emotion he had for Bianca. She wasn’t his mother but he loved her like one. And she had loved him the same way in return.
And I had stripped them from each other.
All because I blamed her for bringing the kidnapper to our home. Yes, she shouldn’t have lied, and yes, she should have asked me for help, but should that get in the way of Cleb keeping the best relationship he’d ever had?
Should it get in the way of the best one I’d ever had?
With the woman I loved?
“Everybody we love goes one day,” Cleb had said. “And we can’t stop them.”
But it didn’t have to be that way. It’d been my decision to send her away. I still loved her. If I decided she ought to leave, I could just as easily decide for her to stay.
If she still wanted to.
“Cleb,” I said.
Cleb stopped and turned at the doorway.
“Would you like it if Bianca was to stay a little longer?” I said.
Cleb beamed at me.
“Yes,” he said. “Very much.”
“Sometimes the people we love do leave us,” I said. “Sometimes it’s their fault and sometimes it’s ours. And sometimes, there’s no need for them to leave at all and you can change things. You can ask them to do the things you need them to. And sometimes people make a mistake and deserve a second chance.”
I got to my feet.
“Get your coat,” I said. “We’re going to the spaceport.”
Cleb wanted to take the arjaths to the spaceport but with the distance we had to cover, they weren’t exactly the most efficient means of transportation.
Waev brought the shuttlecraft around to the front of the house. He didn’t even land. The back lowered, forming a ramp for us to run up.
“Hop in!” he bellowed.
I helped Cleb onboard first and followed him up the ramp. The shuttle shuddered beneath our feet and didn’t settle down until the hatch door shut. I placed Cleb in a seat and strapped him in. He was excited and swung his legs back and forth with greater fervor.
I joined Waev in the co-pilot chair at the front.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Waev said. “We could get into a lot of trouble.”
“We’re not hurting anyone,” I said. “We just want to get Bianca off the ship.”
I accessed my communicator and checked Bianca’s flight details. It was due to take off in one hour. After the journey flight time, we’d have thirty minutes to get through the screening process.
I called the company’s ticket office.
“I bought a ticket yesterday for a one-way trip to Earth,” I said. “Under the name Traes. I want to know if the passenger has checked in yet or not.”
“Let me check that for you, sir,” the automated voice said. “I can confirm the passenger has checked in. She downgraded to pod class. The extra credits will be refunded to your account. Is there anything else I can assist you with today?”
“Yes,” I said. “What is the pod number?”
“The passenger will be staying in pod number JJ13-6492.”
“Are there any pods available for the flight?” I said.
Waev gave me a look of apprehension and nodded at the clock on the dashboard. Time was going to be a major issue.
“All pods are full,” the automated voice said. “Would you like me to check for other classes?”
“Yes.”
“We have three penthouse suites still available. Would you like to book one?”
“Yes!” I said, half to hurry the voice up, half in surprise.
This might actually work! I just needed to get on board the ship. Then I could find her pod and open it. I could speak to her and convince her to return home with me.
I hoped she would come back.
“Would you like me to charge the same bank account?” the automated voice said.
“Yes,” I said. “Send the tickets to my communicator.”
“Payment made and tickets sent. Please have a pleasant journey. Thank you for choosing—”
I ended the communication and waited fo
r the tickets to arrive. It seemed to take an impossibly long amount of time. Then my communicator blinked.
Yes!
“Any luck?” Waev said.
“Yes,” I said. “Expensive luck.”
“It looks like you just ran out of luck. Expensive or otherwise.”
He brought the shuttlecraft to a halt in the long line of traffic. There was strictly no flying allowed within ten miles of the spaceport and all vehicles were restricted to ground level.
This was why I hated interstellar travel.
“Can’t we go around them?” I said.
“Not without me losing my license,” Waev said.
I growled and released my safety harness.
“Cleb, I’m going to run into the spaceport,” I said. “I want you to stay here with Waev.”
“No!”
“It’s safer here.”
“I don’t care! I want Bianca to come home with us!”
“So do I,” I said. “I’ll do my best to convince her to stay. I don’t want you to get hurt. The spaceport can be a dangerous place.”
Especially if you intended on breaking safety protocols…
“Waev will look after you,” I said.
I stepped from the shuttlecraft and ran toward the main entrance. Traveling by foot was a whole lot faster than by shuttlecraft when you were trapped in traffic.
“Hey! Cleb!”
I’d barely run half a dozen steps when I heard the voice. I turned to find Cleb running up behind me. Waev shrugged his shoulders in a way that suggested the meaning: “What do you expect me to do?”
Cleb drew to a stop a few yards from me.
“She’s my friend too,” he said.
I couldn’t stay mad at him. He was a little boy who missed his friend and teacher. I extended my hand. He took it, and we ran for the entrance.
It was busy—it always was. I was not a frequent flyer. I only ever visited mining operations when it was necessary. Most often when there was a serious issue to take care of.
I ran to the robot spaceport assistant, who informed me the departures area was on the other side of the spaceport.
We ran through the terminal. I glanced at the giant clock on the wall. We had fifteen minutes before the ship would take off. We had no bags to check-in and ran directly to security. Even with my priority tickets, we couldn’t skip it.