“You know, when I came here this summer, I wanted to change my life,” Aaron murmured, kicking an acorn several feet ahead of them. He stopped again to meet June’s eyes—they were midnight blue (almost black) as he squinted against the glare from the flashlight. “I never could have done it without you.”
June’s gaze softened. “Sometimes, all it takes is one good summer.”
Aaron shook his head ever so slightly. “Nah. Sometimes, all it takes is you.”
“Are you gonna miss me?” June whispered, stepping closer. He pressed his cheek against Aaron’s shoulder. “Are you gonna remember me?”
“More than you could imagine.”
“Are you gonna be okay without me?” words soft, not quite broken but fractured like their beating hearts.
He shook his head again. “Never.”
There was something so real and so cruel about that statement, Aaron felt he had to take it back in some way. He swallowed, pulled June in close and pressed his nose into his neck. Squeezed him harder and held onto the moment longer. As long as he could.
His life would never be the same without June. How could it? He’d never fallen in love before, but he knew well enough now that it wasn’t something you just got over. Especially when it involved all your firsts. First time feeling comfortable with your sexuality, first time taking someone on a real date, first time sharing a milkshake or a long kiss or a hand job in a hotel room. Those weren’t things that people forgot. Those feelings didn’t have room to move away. Not when they were so potent and powerful.
Never. He’d never. Not even twenty years from now, with a new partner and a house with a yard and kids running through it (if Aaron could even stomach having those things with someone else). He would still stop, look up at the sky and remember what it felt like at this moment, bathed in starlight, the smell of the pines and summer—real summer; the only one of its kind—surrounding them. He’d remember the shape and the taste of familiar lips against his own. He’d remember his fear of the dark like an old friend.
He’d remember June Crow. A wild and untamed renegade boy with stars in his eyes and the cure to his phobia. His first real love. Maybe his last.
“You’re gonna be okay,” June told him, hand clutching his shirt at his sides.
It was the wrong thing to say, but Aaron said it anyway.
“Then…you’re gonna have to survive, aren’t you?”
“Have you seen my purple beach towel?”
June flinched from where he sat on the barstool in Angie’s kitchen and huffed something of a low chuckle. Tonight was the last bonfire of the summer, everyone was going to be there, and Angie tended to get rather type-A when it came to packing for these things. She’d already thrown together a cooler full of snacks, popsicles, and cheap alcohol packed the tent plus every blanket she could find. Then made sure the boombox from her garage was working….
“Ang, you have three towels right here.” June snorted, gesturing to the colorful, folded stack sitting in front of him.
“Yeah, but there are four of us!” she yelled from halfway down the staircase. She rounded the corner and held out both arms in disbelief. “You said Aaron’s coming, right?”
“I am!” the very boy called from inside Angie’s kitchen pantry. His head poked out sheepishly. Less than five minutes ago he’d made the grave mistake of mentioning he was hungry in front of Ms. Delgado. She’d threatened to make him pull weeds in her yard if he didn’t make himself at home and get something.
“Then I need one more towel!”
“Angie…” June gave her a pleading look. “I will personally give up my towel so that you stop running around screaming. Relax.”
“I just want everything to be perfect.” She pouted, stepping down the last few stairs and approaching him. She hopped up onto the empty stool beside him and hung her head in her hands. She was sweating.
“You’re stressing out over nothing.”
“Does your mom really want me to eat her food?” Aaron commented again, backing away with a granola bar and a handful of Oreos. “I feel so rude.”
“She would be offended if you didn’t.” Angie sighed. “In fact, grab the whole pack of Oreos, let’s take them with us.”
“Forget the Oreos, who’s bringing condoms?”
“MIJO!” That was Ms. Delgado from the other room. Obviously listening in on them. Aaron turned a vibrant, fire-hydrant red and flicked June in the ear.
“We’re not having sex at the lake,” he whispered harshly.
“We’re not having sex at all if you flick me again,” June mumbled, although his chest fluttered with amusement. Aaron shoved an Oreo against his lips; perhaps trying to shut him up.
“So, when is Charlie meeting us?”
Angie slumped farther against the tile countertop, looking increasingly miserable. “He should have been here by now.”
“Is he working?” June wondered. The shop closed at nine, and it was already nine-thirty, but sometimes cleaning up took longer than half an hour. Today had also been fairly busy down by the docks—apparently, some camp counselors were rewarding their scouts for good work all season.
“He was, but I left right at closing time, and we’d done basically everything… I hope he’s not fighting with his dad again.”
Aaron leaned over the stack of towels and held an Oreo under Angie’s nose, waiting for her to take it. “I’m sure he’s just getting stuff ready.”
“Maybe a cougar attacked him?”
Aaron stepped on June’s toes, and he yelped, then jabbed him in back of the arm. “Don’t be mean.”
“Whatever.”
“No, you’re right.” Angie forced herself to sit up straighter. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them again, they had more of their usual chocolate-brown sparkle. “I’m just kind of sad this is like…the last time you know?”
June knew this was as hard for Angie as it was for him, and she wasn’t half as good at hiding it behind shitty humor as he was.
“June, come on,” She gestured with her brow toward the hallway leading to the laundry room. “Come help me see if the towel got mixed up somewhere.”
“Why do you need my—”
She grabbed him by the wrist and practically dragged him off the stool. June whined, casting a confused, longing look over his shoulder at Aaron who was too busy stuffing his face to save him. Angie pulled him along past the living room to their converted garage before stopping. She ushered him into the tiny space with the washing machine and shut the door behind them.
“What is it?” he hissed. “You’re acting crazy!”
“I broke up with Charlie.”
June stopped immediately, eyes widening with alarm. “W-What? Did he do something? Was he mean to you—I-I’ll kill him!”
“No!” She placed both her hands on his shoulders to keep him grounded. “And shut up, my mom doesn’t know yet.”
“I thought you really liked him?” Which wasn’t to say June was surprised. She’d always been too good for the guy. He didn’t understand the relationship, but he’d finally allowed himself to get over it. After the awkward conversation with Charlie in Aaron’s convertible, he felt like they were on better terms too. Things were going well all around, so why?
“I guess…well, I guess we’re still together right now because I do really like him. But I told him that after this summer I don’t want to be in a relationship anymore.”
“He’s going back to Bakersfield?” June asked because he was pretty sure that’d been established since the very beginning.
“He doesn’t know where he’s going, but that’s not…no. It’s because of me.”
June watched several months of hidden feelings emerge from Angie’s eyes, and knew before she even opened her mouth, that something else was coming. Something bigger. He leaned against the washing machine and held an arm out to her. She stared at it.
“Come on, just hug me now and spit it out.”
Sh
e swallowed her frown and stepped into his hold with a sad laugh. Hid her face in the crook of his neck.
“I don’t want you to be mad.”
“When do I ever get mad?” he teased because really, he hated seeing her like this. So anxious she was taking her frustrations out on finding towels? That was absurd. She should try punching things instead.
“I’m going to UCLA next month,” she admitted, “I got accepted into their psychology program.”
Memories flashed one by one through June’s brain. Some faded and old like the polaroid photos hanging on Angie’s cork board in her room. Some fresher, newer and more vibrant. The colors of summer one by one painting their friendship in years of life-lessons and experiences. June could feel his heart sinking, and for a moment he thought that maybe he would get mad—mad was easier than sad. And with his and Aaron’s relationship reaching new depths of sad lately, he could hardly stand any more of it.
But then Angie looked up at him; eyes round with worry and freckles so familiar June could probably recreate them in his sketchbook from memory alone. June pulled her in tighter, wrapped his strong arms around her slender shoulders, and kissed the side of her head in the same way Aaron did to him when he was upset.
The lake and the docks would never be the same without Angela Delgado’s smiling face behind the ice cream shop counter, but June knew that if anyone deserved to fly away and be free, it was her.
“I’m happy for you,” he told her, although his heart ached. “Truthfully, I am.”
She sniffed and kissed him back on the cheek before pulling away. Tears threatened to spill over, but she wiped them quickly.
“Who are you, and what did you do with June?”
He rolled his eyes and nudged her away from him—back toward the door so she could let them out. In a way, he wanted to ask her more about it. When she found out and why she’d kept it from him for so long. How she would pay for it; was she taking out loans or did she get scholarships? Was Ms. Delgado going to be lonely without her? Those were all questions June figured Angie would have answers to when the time was right.
They heard Aaron stammering from the other room, a tangle of Spanish and English and the sound of the fridge opening.
“Come on, let’s go save Aaron from your mother. You can tell me more later.”
“Wait I-I really do want my purple towe—”
“Oh, my God, Angie. It’s at the cabin! You left it there last week.” June pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head; trying to keep the smirk off his face. He’d known all along, of course, but was just being a shithead.
“It is?” She whirled on him, mouth hanging open in disbelief. “Why’d you let me run all over the damn house!”
“Because…it was funny?”
That was the second time today someone stepped on his toes, but even he had to admit it was warranted.
The air was cool by the water. Several hours of nighttime had passed and calmed the sun-scorched earth into something more bearable. The water was black and lapping sluggishly at the muddy shore—mostly waves caused by teenagers who were busy splashing each other. Their shrieks could be heard from up the side of the hill, as could the sounds of a drunken three-way in a far-off camper. Fires were lit every twenty yards or so, and between them, dozens of shabby tents that would protect them from mosquitos tonight. There was a keg threatening to crush a wobbly folding table and the sound of Angie’s boombox playing an old CD that she’d burned herself.
June had Aaron waist-deep in the water, smiling brilliantly, eyelids heavy and voice loose from alcohol.
“Come on.” He gestured in a wide arc to the surrounding area. “It’s gonna be worse if you make a scene being shy.”
So far no one had noticed Aaron was hesitant to take off his swim trunks, but June was right, if he didn’t get it over with soon, someone was bound to make fun of him. He sucked in a big breath, surveying the smaller groups of people—mostly girls—bobbing up and down in the water with glee. They were all nude, not a care in the world as the moonlight bounced off their shiny skin. Aaron had never seen so many breasts in one place before.
June dipped down farther into the lake, obviously tired of waiting, and rounded on him with wild eyes. He blew bubbles in the water playfully as he snagged Aaron’s shorts by the sides and tried to yank them down. Aaron collapsed into the water on top of him, squashing him and rolling away in the same movement. He fought to keep his head above the water but otherwise accepted defeat.
June came up coughing and laughing, holding his clothes like a trophy and cheering loud enough it did draw everyone's attention. Aaron squirmed, shrank into the water and decided he was far, far too sober for this. Why didn't alcohol taste better?
“Congrats on losing your skinny-dippy-virginity!” Angie yelled from her place on a floaty nearby. She was just as shameless as June was, and Aaron noted, that sometime within the last month since he’d accidentally walked in on her and Charlie, she’d gotten her nipples pierced. Two pretty yellow beads against her dark skin.
A round of applause started up nearby and spread through the nearest teenagers like wildfire. Aaron’s face burned hotter by the second, especially when June sidled up to him and wrapped his arms around his waist.
No one had really been told that June and Aaron were a couple, but there was no denying it after tonight.
“You’re mean,” he whined and received a wet kiss on the chin in response.
“You’re so cute.” June smiled dreamily. “I like when you get embarrassed. And I like your butt. And your face. And the freckle by your belly button.”
“Please, stop.”
“I love you. Like, a lot.”
“June.” Aaron closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath. He had to pretend people weren’t still staring at them to get the words out of his mouth. “I love you too, but I need a drink.”
The boy nodded, completely unphased. He took a step back from Aaron and whipped his head around toward the shore.
“CHARLIE!”
The lanky, curly-haired boy visibly flinched at the sound of his name. He was leaning over the ice chest near their tent when he turned and peeked over his shoulder.
“BRING ONE FOR AARON!”
“June you don’t have to be so lou—”
“SOMETHING SWEET!”
“Goddammit.” Aaron caught June by the nape of his neck and pulled him into his chest. It was a poor attempt to smother him, but it seemed to do the trick. June giggled, but otherwise remained quiet.
Charlie took his time picking out which wine cooler he thought would be most appropriate and returned to them with two Mike’s Hard Lemonades. He was the only one left to tread into the water with swim trunks. He’d refused to take them off no matter who said what to him. Aaron admired that in a way, but also felt like this was an experience worth having. Had June not tackled him, he would have done it on his own eventually.
“How can you stand him?” Charlie snorted, chucking the glass bottle the last few feet between them. It landed with a plop in the water and then floated back up.
“I’m a gift.” June splashed back at him. “Aaron, tell him I’m a gift.”
“He’s a gift.” Aaron sighed, and Charlie merely waded away.
June secured the bottle and twisted the cap until it popped. He made a move to take a swig, but Aaron caught him before it reached his lips.
“No more for you!” he insisted. “You’re not getting wasted.”
June’s face fell immediately. Eyes looking black as the water in this light. He pouted. “Oh c’mon, it’s my last summer…I don’t wanna die sober.”
The words sent a tiny, electric jolt through Aaron’s heart, but he remained straight-faced and stern anyway. “You’re not dying.”
“Not tonight,” June breathed. “Maybe tomorrow.”
“Not at all, June.”
The idiot started giggling again, tilting his head and body back until he was halfway floating. Aaron had to g
rab his ankle to keep him from drifting away. This was starting to feel a lot more like babysitting than he’d imagined it would, so he stuck the end of the bottle into his mouth and sucked down as much of it as he could in one go. It was cold against his teeth and made him shiver.
“Do you think I deserve to die?” June asked after a moment. His eyes were closed.
Aaron hooked an arm under his shoulders and propped him up. The way his head lolled to the side, and he blinked blearily up at Aaron, made him wonder just how much he’d managed to drink tonight. Earlier, June had been doing shots with three of the dock boys and had lost magnificently—but he’d still seemed sober. Aaron hadn’t noticed him start to succumb to intoxication until just a little while ago. It was getting progressively worse.
“You don’t deserve to die.” Aaron shook his head and forced a smile.
“But don’t you think that everything happens for a reason?”
It was quite frightening really. That this was the unfiltered June Aaron had so desperately wanted to see in the past. He had his questions and his worries, but it didn’t occur to him June would also be a gnarled mess of insecurities.
“I don’t know,” Aaron admitted. He used to think everything happened for a reason, but June had been right when he’d snapped at him for his ignorance. The conversation they’d had in IHOP still haunted him. His heart was weakening as June searched his gaze. Almost pleading.
“Do you want to go eat something?” Aaron suggested. He didn’t want June to have a bad time thinking about all these things tonight, and he didn’t want June to get sick later either. Food was going to help.
“Mmmm…peanut butter sandwiches?”
“Sure,” Aaron agreed. They’d packed those earlier. “Where did you put my shorts?”
June blinked, slowly understanding the question until his brow furrowed. He sat up, legs floundering in the water for a moment as he peered around them. It was too dark to see much of anything, let alone where a pair of swim trunks would have ended up.
“Shit…”
Aaron pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes shut. The only thing he had to dowse his smoldering frustration was the beverage in his hand, so he tipped it back and chugged the rest.
The Maple Effect Page 42