Hold the Forevers

by K. A. Linde

  “Are you happy? I haven’t heard about a new boy anytime recently.”

  Marley crinkled her nose, and Maddox laughed.

  “Oh, here we go,” Maddox said.

  “Hey, if you have deets, you could tell your roommate,” I said, smacking his chest.

  He laughed harder. “She hasn’t told you about the grad school guy who showed up at her apartment to serenade her?”

  My eyes widened. “Excuse me?”

  “It wasn’t like that,” Marley insisted. “It was a guy I’d dated for three seconds at Harvard last semester. I guess he was still into me.”

  “He played a guitar outside of your apartment and sang a song he’d written about you.”

  Marley rolled her eyes at Maddox. “So fucking cheesy.”

  “It sounds nice,” Teena said.

  “That is so not Marley though.”

  “It reeks of desperation,” Marley said.

  “One day, you are going to find someone who sweeps you off of your feet so completely that all that desperation will look like love.”

  She shot me a quintessential Marley look. “I’m not you.”

  “True.”

  I drained my glass and then let her refill it before I went in search of the person who had swept me off of my feet.

  “There you are,” Ash said when I found him across the deck. He pressed a kiss to my cherry-red lips. “I’m glad Marley agreed to come to the party tonight.”

  “Me too.”

  “Is she still mad at me?”

  I made a face. “She wants me to be happy.”

  “And Josie?”

  “You’ll have a harder time with her. Grudge-holder and all.”

  “Why don’t we plan a trip to LA to see her?”

  “I’d love that,” I gushed. “Maybe spring break.”

  “I’ll get us tickets.”

  I bit my lip. “Thank you.”

  “Just because I’ve won back over the love of my life doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying to win over her friends. I know how important they are to you.”

  “They are,” I said. I leaned into him and looked across the Savannah waterfront. “I miss Sunny.”

  “Me too,” he said, pressing a kiss into my head. “Maybe we should have brought her with us.”

  “She hates fireworks. She’d have been a wreck. It’s better that she’s at the vet.”

  “Probably.”

  I reached up on my tiptoes and kissed him again. “This is right where I want to be.”

  “Good.”

  His hand slipped down the back of my silky red dress until he grasped my ass. I tilted my head up to look at him. He smiled that same Ash smile that I’d always fallen for. One that was all mine.

  We’d only been dating a few weeks ago. I’d still been hesitant that this would work despite the last few months of friendship while I was in PT school. It was a grueling semester, and it was good to have Ash there when things got hard with school and Mom. Then he’d come over with an early Christmas present—a new copy of Little Women for my shelf—and I’d realized I had no reason to hold back.

  Though we were together, we hadn’t quite moved to the next level. I hadn’t exactly thrown caution to the wind, like I’d let Marley believe. I wanted this, but I wanted it the right way. And now, I was here, staring up at his perfect lips, with his hand dragging me closer against him, and I had no idea why we were waiting.

  I released a breath. “Maybe we should …” I tipped my head toward the stairs to go below deck.

  This was where we’d shared our first New Year’s. Where we’d had our first time. It felt symbolic that this was where it would all start again.

  “Maybe we should,” he agreed, walking me away from the rest of the party.

  We headed downstairs to the small bedroom. It’d been renovated since we’d used it five years earlier, but it still felt the same.

  The party roared overhead. Way more people than should probably be on the deck, anticipating the annual fireworks display. But here in this space, we were cocooned against the noise.

  Before we even made it fully through the door, Ash’s hands were on me, pulling me against him. He kissed me hard, his tongue brushing against mine.

  All the restraint had evaporated.

  We’d pulled the pin on the grenade.

  I’d wanted this to be a perfect moment for us to be back together, but now that I was here, all I wanted was him. I couldn’t seem to slow down and revel in what was happening. There would have to be time for that later. We’d inched toward the precipice and not fallen over it. Now, there was nothing between us, nothing to stop us.

  His hands fumbled my skirt up to my hips, wrenching at the string of my thong and snapping it as if it were made of tissue paper. I gasped in an almost protest, but then his lips were against mine. I fumbled for his belt, yanking his shirt loose from his pants and pushing them off of his narrow hips.

  “Fuck, Lila.”

  He walked me backward until my knees hit the bed. Then, he lifted my ass up, dropping me on the comforter, never breaking our lip-lock. I stroked him up and down once before he pressed me flat.

  “God, I’ve missed you,” he said, wrapping my legs around his waist and positioning himself at my opening.

  “I’ve missed you too.”

  We were in a position to rewrite our relationship. We could have a fresh start and finally put the past behind us.

  “Come here,” I said, reaching for him.

  He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. His hand slid up my arm before pinning it over my head. He did it with the other one as well, so I was practically immobile before him.

  “You’re mine.”

  “Yes,” I whispered.

  I squirmed, wanting him to move forward, to claim me in every way.

  Then he plunged forward, and we were fitted together again. I was completely full of him. My shout smothered by his kisses. My body there for his taking. My heart raced ahead of us both.

  “Ash,” I gasped.

  “Yes. Lila, God, you feel so fucking good. So fucking good.”

  He stole my breath again, holding both of my hands down with one of his and using his free hand to grip my hip as he pushed in and out. Gradually picking up speed as he worked me into a frenzy. I was already so hot for him that I thought I would combust, but he kept me from the edge as he used every trick he’d learned about my body over the years to take me there.

  His fingers slipped down between my legs, and the first brush of his thumb against my clit sent me jumping.

  “Oh!”

  But he didn’t stop. He circled my clit as he drove into me over and over again. I saw stars as everything built up and up and up. Until I could hold out no longer and I shouted my orgasm into the bedroom. He kept pumping in and out as I contracted around him.

  “Fuck,” he growled before jerking to a halt and finishing inside of me. He pressed his forehead to my chest once he was done. He mumbled a chorus of, “Fuck, fuck, fuck …”

  He released my hands, and I slowly dropped them down into his hair. I didn’t care that I was messing up the perfectly gelled strands. All I cared about was how incredible I felt and that I was here right now with my Ash.

  “Hey,” I whispered.

  He looked up at me with sex eyes.

  “Give me a kiss.”

  “Anything for you.”

  His mouth met mine one last time, a slow, generous kiss. One that sent my core tightening all over again with him still inside of me. We stayed like that longer than we probably should have, considering we were hosting this party. But it was worth it.

  By the time we’d righted our clothes and returned to the party, we were in the beginning of the midnight countdown. Marley shot me a suspicious look, but I just smiled at her. Who cared what anyone else thought? I knew that this thing with Ash was right. It had never felt more right than with his arms around me as we counted down to a whole new year.

  “Lila,”
he murmured into my ear.

  “Hmm?”

  “I want everything with you.”

  I laughed softly. “You have everything with me.”

  “No, I want … more … all of it.”

  I looked up at his very serious expression. “What do you mean?”

  “Now that I have you, I never want to lose you.” His mouth brushed the shell of my ear. “I want the whole lot: you in my house, you with my name, you with my kids.”

  I froze at the words. At the future that he’d painted for us. I could see it so clearly. And somehow, I’d never thought that far ahead. Never let myself consider where I was going or when wedding bells would ring.

  “Why don’t we take it one day at a time?”

  But Ash knew me too well not to understand my hesitancy.

  “It’s too soon,” he said automatically. “I know it is. But with you, Lila, I always seem to get ahead of myself. First step: move in with me.”

  My jaw dropped at the quick proposal. “I have … the house with Maddox.”

  “We could make it work.”

  And so I gave him the truth. “I’m not ready.”

  There was hurt in his blue eyes. He was ready. Ready for everything with me. Ready to marry me on the spot if he could. I could see it all in his eyes. But I wasn’t there yet. I’d been the one who was hurt, and while I could argue with Marley all day long, she had been right. I needed to be careful. I needed to be sure.

  Then the countdown rang down to zero, fireworks exploded in the sky overhead, and Ash pulled me in for a lasting kiss. A new year, a new promise, a new life.

  25

  Atlanta

  May 14, 2016

  My fingers slid along the spines of my books artfully arranged on Cole’s bookshelf. Three years ago, I’d been too afraid to move in with Ash when he’d asked. I refused to make the same mistake again with Cole now that we had our chance. So, when he’d asked, I’d responded with a resounding yes. And then promptly commandeered his bookshelf for my own. He’d rolled his eyes as I’d emptied my boxes of books onto the beautiful mahogany hardwood shelves.

  I heard a camera flash behind me and whipped around to find Cole pointing his DSLR at me.

  “What are you taking pictures of?”

  “I want to remember this day forever.”

  “Oh?” I asked, arching an eyebrow.

  He grinned. “The day we moved into our first house together.”

  I reached onto my tiptoes and kissed him. “Can I see?”

  “Let me take some more first.”

  “Fine.” Then I went back to organizing.

  “Are you still obsessing about the bookshelves?” Cole asked.

  “Define obsessing.”

  He laughed and then snapped another picture of me. And another. And another.

  “How many are you going to take?” I asked.

  But he’d let the camera drop from the strap around his neck and lifted me up over his shoulder. I squealed as he carried me away from the bookshelves and effortlessly tossed me down on our couch. Our couch. I still wasn’t used to that.

  Sunny popped her head up from her bed in the corner and then hopped over to squeeze her way in between us. I petted her, and Cole dropped a kiss on her head.

  “Good puppy,” he cooed. “You, however,” he said, tugging my hair loose from its messy bun and brushing his fingers through it. “You need to take a break. Be more like Sunny.”

  “I can’t be that lazy.”

  “True, but people will be here soon. It doesn’t have to be perfect.”

  “I know.”

  “You know, but it does need to be perfect?”

  “No! I just don’t want there to be visible boxes for our first official housewarming party.”

  “Literally no one is going to care but you.”

  “So?”

  He kissed all over my face. “I love when you’re irrational and stubborn. It’s my favorite combo.”

  “Hey!”

  “I’m serious. It’s the best. Can I help move some boxes, so no one can see them?”

  “Yes, please.”

  He lifted me back to my feet, putting his camera on the bar, and then let me direct him to clean up in the last half hour before all of our friends burst into our new house. Well, Cole’s house. He’d put down the down payment, and it was in his name. It was hard to believe that we’d been dating for over a year already. Moving in together was a big step for me. I’d never lived with anyone I was dating.

  We tucked away the last remaining box right before the doorbell rang. I dashed to answer it, and Marley entered with Josie on her heels.

  “The party has arrived,” Josie said, dumping a giant box into Cole’s arms and drawing me into a hug. “I’ve missed you so much.”

  “I’ve missed you too.”

  We squeezed even tighter, moving back and forth like it’d been a decade since we’d seen each other instead of a few months. We used to go the whole year without each other, but then we used to get the entire summer together too. And now, I never got enough Josie time. She was too busy, being famous.

  Sunny ran around barking at us until Josie picked her up and loved on her.

  “Mars,” I said in welcome.

  She handed me a square present. “I hope Cole likes it.”

  I laughed. “Oh boy.”

  She grinned wickedly. “Anyway, who else is coming to this thing?”

  “Mostly work friends.”

  “Boring,” she joked.

  I was so fucking glad that Marley had gotten a job as a professor at Emory. She had her own genetics research lab and was generally saving the world. But I was mostly glad we were both in Atlanta. As much as I liked my work friends, no one else was Marley.

  More people trickled in. Kristen brought a present to rival Josie’s, and the rest of the guys brought cards and nodded at us.

  “So, wait,” Kristen said once she had a drink in hand, “you’re Josephine Reynolds?”

  Josie nodded and held her hand out. “You can call me Josie.”

  “Holy shit!” She smacked me. “Why didn’t you tell me you were friends with Josephine Reynolds?”

  “Uh … I didn’t know that you were an Academy fan?”

  “Who isn’t an Academy fan?” Kristen asked.

  Matthew, who was also in the training room with us, raised his hands. “No offense.”

  “None taken,” Josie said. “It’s not for everyone.”

  “You’re winning, like, fucking Emmys,” Kristen gushed.

  Josie was the best with fans though. She’d always been that way, even before she became a famous TV star. People had trailed her for who she was long before then. “Thanks, babe. Should we selfie?”

  “Fuck yes, we should.”

  Marley rolled her eyes at the display. “You’d think this was unusual.”

  “Nope. Just Josie.”

  Cole slung an arm around my shoulders. “Can confirm that Josie was like this before television.”

  Josie snapped the picture with her best angles and then grinned at Cole. “Obviously. I was the one who took those incredible pictures of you at the football game.”

  “It’s still unfair that Josie was there and I wasn’t,” Marley added as we all settled into the living room. Sunny curled up into Marley’s lap and looked like she was never planning to leave.

  “Wait … I’ve heard this story,” Kristen butted in. “There are pictures?”

  Josie held up one finger. “Hold, please.”

  “Oh, here we go,” I said with an eye roll.

  Josie passed her phone to Kristen. “There. I took those when they first met.”

  “Why are those still on your phone?” I asked, my cheeks going red.

  “I never delete pictures.”

  “Dear God,” I groaned.

  “I can’t believe you two started dating your freshman year,” Kristen said, handing the phone back. “That’s so romantic.”

  Minus the years i
n between when he had been in San Francisco and everything had crumbled to pieces.

  “We got lucky,” Cole said as he pressed a kiss to my hair. “Found our person early.”

  “If I were still with the guy I’d met in college, I’d be divorced, or one of us would have been murdered,” Kristen said.

  Marley nodded. “Same.”

  Josie shrugged. “I didn’t date anyone in college.”

  Marley and I snorted at the same time.

  “What? I didn’t!”

  “Define date,” I said with an arched eyebrow.

  “Whatever!”

  “SCAD was a breeding ground for cute, charismatic, artsy types,” Marley said. “You were the queen of that breeding ground.”

  Josie huffed. “You two are the worst.”

  Kristen grinned. “I love this.”

  “Anyway,” Josie said with a pointed look at the two of us.

  “Aren’t you engaged?” Kristen asked.

  “God, you do stalk her,” I joked.

  Kristen shot me a look with a half-shoulder shrug that said she really did. “Sorry.”

  “I am engaged!” Josie exclaimed.

  “At least we can go to this fucking wedding,” I grumbled.

  “It’s not my fault that I eloped.”

  Marley laughed. “Isn’t it kind of your fault?”

  “Okay, yes, but it was the right decision at the time,” Josie said. “And now, a full wedding where you all can be there and be bridesmaids makes more sense this time around.”

  “What about the next wedding?” Marley deadpanned.

  Josie swatted at her. “You’re lucky you’re my best friend.”

  “When is it happening?” Cole asked. “I’m about wedding’d out. We had three this spring and have three more this summer.”

  “Sorry, man,” Michael said. He’d gotten married in the spring.

  “I swear, everyone we know is getting married.”

  “Is one of those Elle’s wedding?” Marley asked.

  I nodded. “Yes, I’m a bridesmaid for that one!”

  “I’ll be there. I just got the invite. It’ll be good to be home and see Maddox.”

  “Yes, Savannah weddings are all beautiful,” Cole said. “But, Josie, seriously, wait a year at least.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Sorry to disappoint. I was thinking fall … but maybe next summer.”