by L. S. Pullen
“No. It’s on at the theatre?”
I nod. “Yes, I’ll have to take you,” I say with a wink.
“I’d like that.” She smiles, and I’m not sure if she means seeing it at the theatre or going with me, but either way, my pulse begins to race. The more time I spend with this girl, the harder I’m finding it to keep myself and my thoughts at arm’s length.
Chapter 8
Sophie
Spending time with Evie and Ana between work these last few weeks has been a change of pace. They never give up about Charlie and me.
“Sophie, dear, do tell us why the two of you aren’t courting again?” Ana asks me casually while watching me knead some bread. And there goes my face heating up like a freaking hot tub. She doesn’t quit; we could be talking about the moon, and she still finds a way to drop it into the conversation.
“Who?” I ask, knowing full well I am only leading myself into a trap.
“Charlie, of course.”
As much as I’ve enjoyed my time with them, I’m looking forward to Flick and Nate’s return. At least then their attention will be placed elsewhere; they can badger the two of them about having grandbabies.
I hold in my sigh. I know they’re not doing it offensively, but I can’t even think that. He’s become such a good friend to me. “We’re friends, that’s all.”
“Well, what we saw at the wedding was more than a peck between friends,” Evie says slowly, her lazy smile goading me. As much as I don’t want to feed into this mini interrogation, maybe if I’m honest a tad and give them something, they’ll back off.
“It was a wind-up. It was only meant to be a chaste kiss…nothing more. I care about him, of course, but not like that.” A lie. I knead the bread harder. “We’re friends, and I wouldn’t dream of jeopardising it.”
I’ve lost too much over the last couple of years. And secretly the little hope I did have begun to diminish. And then there’s knowing who to trust. I thought Ana would be the one to pipe up, so I’m surprised when it’s Evie, instead.
“Sophie, dear, I truly believe some of the best relationships begin with friendship. When I married Laurie, we were friends before we became lovers. Our relationship was anything but conventional. I see similarities in you like my younger self. You deserve to be happy. Sometimes you have to be brave, take the first step; the risk is worth the reward.”
I only nod in response. It’s one thing to say, another to do. But the risk she’s talking about isn’t worth the sacrifice. Charlie is a player, granted, but he’s also an all right guy. He’s respectful, and most importantly he’s part of our wayward family. I also have Nate and Flick to consider, and why am I even contemplating any of these thoughts anyway?
Charlie has woven his way into my life. A sleek stealth manoeuvre, without intention or agenda. I found myself frequenting his bar more and more. I love our banter, the back and forth. But then there’s the other side to him. When he barely even knew me, he helped me make a quick escape, so I didn’t have to face my ex-fiancé. He held my hand at the edge of a pool when I had a mini-breakdown. So, even the possibility of a fall out between the two of us makes me feel sick.
I can talk to him, same as with Simon, and that’s saying something. I’ve even opened up to him about the accidental overdose, which was not one of my finest hours. He listened as I unloaded on him, and he held my hand like an anchor. It frightens me, too. I’ve never felt a connection like it. For the first time in a long time, someone else’s presence is filling the void. Sometimes I can be surrounded by people and yet, I’m completely isolated. Inside, I’m screaming, unable to control my chain of thoughts and yet on the outside, I smile and try to keep up a facade that I’m all right. But it’s a lie.
Since my fall out with my parents, the only family I’ve had is this one. So, getting to spend time here while Flick and Nate are away was a no brainer. I get lost listening to Ana and Evie, sharing memories and stories of a life before. The wistful way their eyes light up and their age slips away as if no time has passed at all. I admire the sacrifices made by so many. To know Ana was an SOE in the Second World War left me completely speechless.
My grandparents are long gone, and sometimes I get swept up in a tide of bitterness toward my mum and dad, but I squash it down. I should be grateful after all—inadvertently. They chose me when they adopted me. They gave me the best life they knew how. It’s easy to see things more clearly when you take a step back. It wasn’t always that way. When I was little, we were happier. I lost them long before they lost me. They were so caught up in trying to keep up appearances, they lost their way. I tried so hard to be everything they wanted me to be, but the more I tried, the harder I seemed to fail.
Tonight, I find myself at a loss. Evie and Ana have plans and won’t be back until later. I roam the vast expanse of the house after tidying up and head to what used to be Flick’s room. I walk to the dresser. Staring back at me, slipped under the edge of a wooden frame, is the photo of Charlie and me. I reach for them and tear one off, sliding it behind the other photos I have in my purse.
I slide the other one back on the edge of the mirror before settling on the window seat, pulling my legs up underneath me. I grab my book and flip it open to the bookmarked page.
“I’m afraid I can’t explain myself, sir. Because I am not myself, you see?”
Charlie
I wipe down the bar and smile to myself. Soph and I have slipped into a domestic set up. Between our shifts and spending time with Ana and Evie, we’ve fallen into a pattern. I’ve not touched her since the day after the wedding, which was only in concern for her face. You can barely see where he hurt her eye, but I know it was there. I remember.
All I know is going back home after this is going to be an adjustment. I’ve lived away from home since I was eighteen, and I had shared accommodation when I was still at Uni, but I’ve been on my own ever since. I used to crave the solitude, going back to an empty house. But these past few weeks have been good for me.
Air whips past me before I am struck on the arm with the slash of a tablecloth. I give Olly my attention as he nods his head towards the door with a smile on his face.
Sophie walks towards us.
“Hello, beautiful,” Olly says before I can even open my mouth.
She smiles. “Hi, Olly.”
“I’ve got this,” I snap.
He eyes me with a slight smirk and nods at Sophie, heading off to another patron.
“Hey, that was rude,” she says.
“Sorry. Rough shift.” It’s a lie. I’ve not been able to get her off my mind. I step up to lean over the bar, kissing her on the cheek, then I look over to Olly.
Mine.
What the fuck is with me? I’m not jealous by nature, and honestly, she could do a lot worse than someone like him.
“So, you finally took Ana and Evie’s advice for a night out?”
“Yeah, they are kind of relentless, aren’t they? Besides, my book wasn’t doing it for me.” Her smile is warm, but her voice is seductive without even trying. My dick twitches. I wonder what does it for her. What the fuck?
I laugh in response and make her a drink then slide it over to her.
“Did you drive?” I ask.
She nods, jiggling her keys, then drops them inside her bag, pulling out her purse to pay. I wave her off, and she cuts her eyes at me before putting it away.
“Hang here, have a few drinks, and let your hair down. I can drive us back home.”
“What about my car?” she asks.
“We can come back and grab it in the morning.” The more I say words like us and we, the more I struggle to keep my mouth shut about the fact I like her. Like, really like her.
Her eyes twinkle at my suggestion. “Well, I guess I can be persuaded. Don’t suppose you can take a small break and join me for a bit?” she asks.
“I don’t know. I’ve heard the owner is a right dipshit.”
She laughs as I grab myself a coke and pop the c
ap on the bottle opener. To punters, you would think it was off the edge of the bar, but it’s a built-in bottle opener and the caps drop into the tray underneath.
I point to a spare booth. Thankfully tonight’s been quiet. It usually is when the footie is on. I don’t have sports channels; we have music.
She slides in, and I sit opposite.
“I can’t believe how quickly the last couple of weeks have gone,” she says.
“I know. I was thinking the same thing right before you walked in.”
We talk for a bit, but then I get a sudden rush of punters. She spots someone she knows, so I don’t feel too bad when I leave her to get back to work.
After changing a barrel, I come back to find Olly and Sophie talking. He says something to her, and she smacks his shoulder playfully. I don’t know why, but my gut twists. Ever since that fucking douchebag from the wedding, I have this yearning to protect her, but this is Olly, and he’s a good guy. I turn back and head to my office to collect myself.
When I leave, I walk straight into Soph.
Her hand raises to her chest. “Damn it, Charlie, you scared me,” she says with a giggle.
“What are you doing back here?” I ask.
“Olly said it was okay to use the staff toilet.”
I nod and reach up to tuck the loose hair behind her ear. Her breath catches, and I drop my hand almost immediately. I have to stop touching her.
“I’ll let you…” I say without finishing the sentence. Her cheeks turn red as she walks past me, and I force myself back to the bar.
“You all right, boss?” Olly asks.
“I’d be better if you stopped flirting with my best mates’ friend.”
He studies me for a beat, a smirk on his face, but not the least bit phased. Cool as a fucking cucumber.
“Are you shitting me?” he asks with a chuckle.
“I shit you not,” I reply, staring him straight in the eye.
“Listen, in case it slipped your notice, she’s an attractive woman, and the last time I checked, a free agent. So, unless she says otherwise, it’s not your call.” I usually like his no-bullshit approach, but when it comes to her, I don’t have an ounce of patience. I’m about to tell him as much when someone needs serving. I don’t know why I’m getting so worked up. Olly is a good guy, and sure, he can do what he wants in his own time, but not here and sure as hell, not with her.
It takes everything in me to not grab Olly by the throat. If his hand goes towards her face one more time, I swear to all that is holy.
He slings a tea towel over his shoulder and catches my eye.
Did he wink at me?
I clench my fists, and my body moves towards them. Sophie pauses and then her head turns in my direction, her eyes meeting mine. She smiles, but it falls short when she scans my face. Olly taps her hand, and she turns back to him, giving him her full attention. He leans over the bar and says something in her ear. It irks me to the core. That smug little fucker. I know he’s my friend, but he’s seriously pushing my buttons.
An almighty crash of shattering glass echoes through the bar, followed by a round of applause and hollers. Olly rolls his eyes and pulls away from Soph to grab the dustpan and brush, moving off to the source of all the commotion.
Soph slips off the stool and walks towards me. I don’t know when I stopped moving. Maybe it’s while I was watching as Olly openly flirted with her to bait me.
“Are you okay?” she asks, resting her palm on my arm.
I stare at her hand for a beat, and then my eyes move back up to her face. She drops it and wraps it around her stomach.
“Is something going on with you and Oliver? Do you…like him?”
I cringe, why did I ask that?
She physically puts distance between us, taking a step back. Her face drops, and immediately I feel like a fucking prick. I step into her space, the tips of my shoes touch hers. I place my finger under her chin, so she has to focus on me.
“Shit, I’m sorry. I don’t know where that came from,” I say.
She shrugs with indifference, but I see the hurt reflected in her eyes.
“It’s okay. You can ask me, but in answer to your question, no, nothing is going on. I like him, but not like that. Why did you ask?” She bites the corner of her lip. Her eyes roam over my chest.
I let out a breath. “I don’t know, just the way he is with you.”
She grits her teeth now. I see her jaw tick before she opens her mouth to speak. “And the way I am with him would have you believe something is going on between us?”
My hand moves to her shoulder, and I squeeze gently.
“No… it’s just I’m looking out for you. Flick—”
Her head tilts up and she gapes at me, her eyes go wide.
“Great… she asked you to babysit me.”
I almost want to smile but don’t; I love it when she gets feisty.
“No, not exactly.”
It’s true. Flick did ask me to keep an eye on her, hell even Simon did. But my intentions are purely selfish, and I’m brave enough to admit it, at least to myself. She has me tied in knots and doesn’t even know it. Her smell invades my senses, and like everything about her, I am hyper-aware of it. I know I shouldn’t still be standing this close to her, but I can’t even will myself away.
“Charlie, I am more than capable of looking after myself. I’m not completely useless.”
She steps away and turns her back on me, but I grab her softly by the elbow and pull her back.
“Sophie, I only want the best for you. I never meant to insult you. You know I think you’re awesome,” I say with a wink.
It works. She gives me a tiny nod of her head and a slight eye roll, but her lips slant into a small smile.
“Fine. In the way of an apology, you can buy me a drink.”
I laugh and pull her into my side as I kiss her hair like a fucking weirdo.
“Well, it is my bar,” I say as if that’s all the answer she needs.
She nudges me with her elbow. “No, you can buy me a drink, pay by cash or card. But I want to see you pay.”
I lean down to her ear; a tiny gasp escapes her lips as I whisper, “Just so you know, I always keep a mental tab, and take it out of my salary.”
She gazes up at me with a smile. “Of course, you do.” Grabbing my hand, she pulls me towards the bar. My hand has never felt so right in someone else’s, and I don’t ever want to let go. The thought sends a weird sensation through my body.
Chapter 9
Charlie
It’s finally quietened down. My eyes roam, in search of Sophie. When I spot her talking to yet another jack arse, she glances up and catches me. I shake my head and mouth the word, “Really?” She smiles, excuses herself, and heads my way.
“I may be a little tipsy. I didn’t eat much earlier. Not that I’ve had much to drink,” she says on a happy sigh.
I can’t help but smile at her waffling. Her tipsy equates to cute.
“Nothing wrong with letting your hair down. I need to clear out the stragglers. Are you cool to wait for me, or have you had a better offer?” I say, only half-joking.
Peering back over her shoulder, she giggles. “As if. He’s a bit of a tool, to be honest. I didn’t want to be rude. Besides, I told him you were my boyfriend. Hope you don’t mind?”
A surge of pride engulfs me. Under any other circumstance, it might bother me, but with her, I don’t mind. Not at all.
“I’m wounded. Talk about feeling used…” I reach out my hand to her face as I tuck her hair behind her ear. I like to see her face. Her eyelids flutter closed briefly then when she opens them, they’re sparkling. I offer her another drink then get to closing.
Approaching Sophie from behind, I lean in and whisper, “Boo.”
She spins. “Shit you scared me,” she says and punches me on the shoulder.
I laugh, shaking my head, and I ruffle her hair. Some girls would freak but not her. Instead, she playfully punches
me in the stomach.
“Don’t know why you even bother. You couldn’t punch your way out of a wet paper bag,” I say.
“Ha, bloody ha, you’re so funny.”
“Looks like he moved on,” I say, pointing my thumb back over my shoulder as the jerk leaves with some other woman.
She stares past me. “Oh no, what will I do now?”
“I’m sure you’ll cope,” I say with a wink. “Ready to make a move?” She nods. Olly leans over the bar and kisses her goodbye. His eyes meet mine, that son of a bitch.
We head out the back down the hall. She’s humming to herself, and now that I know what she sounds like when she sings, I wish she were. Music has always been a kind of therapy for me.
“Charlie, do you ever think about what it would be like to have what Flick and Nate do? Does it ever make you want for something like that? Be honest…”
I pause before answering. Well, if that isn’t a loaded question.
“Honestly?” I ask.
“Yes, honestly,” she replies.
“For the right somebody, then yes, I guess so.”
Someone like you.
She stacks it right in front of me. I reach out and grab her waist.
“Shit, you okay?” I ask.
She bursts out laughing. “Yeah, I’m fine. At least I’m wearing flats—” Her laugh cuts her off. Her face free of burdens, there’s something different about her when she’s like this. When she’s happy.
“Sorry, I’m embarrassing myself yet again,” she says, peeping up at me.
“Not at all.” My eyes skim over her face.
“So why are you staring at me like that?” she asks as she pulls back slightly.
“I’m not… I was thinking about something I need to do.”
“Oh, I didn’t think. Have you got plans for later? I can get a cab.” She fumbles inside her bag.
I place my hand on her arm to still her. “No, I don’t, it’s not that… oh, what the hell.”
For the first time in a long time, I don’t think. Instead, I move to palm the back of her neck and pull her towards me. Her breath hitches as her lips part, eyes wide as I lean in. My body’s now flush with hers. Her warmth spreads over me as I walk her back towards the wall.