CHAPTER XI.
With this party Miss Milner arrived at her country house, and for nearsix weeks, all around was the picture of tranquillity; her satisfactionwas as evident as every other person's; and all severe admonition beingat this time unnecessary, either to exhort her to her duty, or to warnher against her folly, she was even in perfect good humour with MissFenton, and added friendship to hospitality.
Mr. Sandford, who came with Lord Elmwood to the neighbouring seat, abouta week after the arrival of Miss Milner at her's, was so scrupulouslyexact in the observance of his word, "_Never to enter a house of MissMilner's,_" that he would not even call upon his friend Dorriforththere--but in their walks, and at Lord Elmwood's, the two parties wouldoccasionally join, and of course Sandford and she at those times met--yetso distant was the reserve on either side, that not a single word uponany occasion was ever exchanged between them.
Miss Milner did not like Mr. Sandford; yet as there was no cause ofinveterate rancour, admiring him too as a man who meant well, and beingbesides of a most forgiving temper, she frequently felt concerned thathe did not speak to her, although it had been to find fault as usual--andone morning as they were all, after a long ramble, drawing towards herhouse, where Lord Elmwood was invited to dine, she could not restraindropping a tear at seeing Sandford turn back and wish them a "Good day."
But though she had the generosity to forgive an affront, she had not thehumility to make a concession; and she foresaw that nothing less thansome very humble atonement on her part would prevail upon the haughtypriest to be reconciled. Dorriforth saw her concern upon this lasttrifling occasion with a secret pleasure, and an admiration that she hadnever before excited. She once insinuated to him to be a mediatorbetween them; but before any accommodation could take place, the peaceand composure of their abode were disturbed by the arrival of Sir EdwardAshton at Lord Elmwood's, where it appeared as if he had been invited inorder to pursue his matrimonial plan.
At a dinner given by Lord Elmwood, Sir Edward was announced as anunexpected visitor; Miss Milner did not suppose him such, and she turnedpale when his name was uttered. Dorriforth fixed his eyes upon her withsome tokens of compassion, while Sandford seemed to exult, and by hisrepeated "Welcomes" to the Baronet, gave proofs how much he was rejoicedto see him. All the declining enmity of Miss Milner was renewed at thisbehaviour, and suspecting Sandford as the instigator of the visit, shecould not overcome her displeasure, but gave way to it in a manner shethought the most mortifying. Sir Edward, in the course of conversation,enquired "What neighbours were in the country;" and she, with anappearance of high satisfaction, named Lord Frederick Lawnly as beinghourly expected at his uncle's. The colour spread over Sir Edward'sface--Dorriforth was confounded--and Mr. Sandford looked enraged.
"Did Lord Frederick tell _you_ he should be down?" Sandford asked ofDorriforth.
To which he replied, "No."
"But I hope, Mr. Sandford, you will permit _me_ to know?" said MissMilner. For as she now meant to torment him by what she said, she nolonger constrained herself to silence--and as he harboured the same kindintention towards her, he had no longer any objection to make a reply,and therefore answered,
"No, madam, if it depended upon my permission, you should _not_ know."
"Not _any thing_, Sir, I dare say; you would keep me in utterignorance."
"I would."
"From a self-interested motive, Mr. Sandford--that I might have a greaterrespect for you."
Some of the company laughed--Mrs. Horton coughed--Miss Woodleyblushed--Lord Elmwood sneered--Dorriforth frowned--and Miss Fenton lookedjust as she did before.
The conversation was changed as soon as possible, and early in theevening the party from Milner Lodge returned home.
Miss Milner had scarce left her dressing room, where she had been takingoff some part of her dress, when Dorriforth's servant came to acquainther that his master was alone in his study, and begged to speak withher. She felt herself tremble--she immediately experienced aconsciousness that she had not acted properly at Lord Elmwood's; for shefelt a presentiment that her guardian was going to upbraid her, and herheart whispered that he had never yet reproached her without a cause.
Miss Woodley just then entered her apartment, and she found herself somuch a coward, as to propose that she should go with her, and aid herwith a word or two occasionally in her excuse.
"What you, my dear," returned Miss Woodley, "who not three hours ago hadthe courage to vindicate your own cause before a whole company, of whommany were your adversaries; do _you_ want an advocate before yourguardian alone, who has ever treated you with tenderness?"
"It is that very tenderness which frightens me; which intimidates, andstrikes me dumb. Is it possible I can return impertinence to thelanguage and manners which Mr. Dorriforth uses? and as I am debarredfrom that resource, what can I do but stand before him like a guiltycreature, acknowledging my faults."
She again entreated her friend to go with her; but on a positiverefusal, from the impropriety of such an intrusion, she was obliged atlength to go by herself.
How much does the difference of exterior circumstances influence notonly the manners, but even the persons of some people! Miss Milner inLord Elmwood's drawing room, surrounded by listeners, by admirers, (foreven her enemies could not look at her without admiration) animated withapprobation and applause--and Miss Milner, with no giddy observer to giveher actions a false eclat, destitute of all but her own understanding,(which secretly condemns her) upon the point of receiving censure fromher guardian and friend, are two different beings. Though stillbeautiful beyond description, she does not look even in person the same.In the last-mentioned situation, she was shorter in stature than in theformer--she was paler--she was thinner--and a very different contourpresided over her whole air, and all her features.
When she arrived at the door of the study, she opened it with atrepidation she could hardly account for, and entered to Dorriforth thealtered woman she has been represented. His heart had taken the mostdecided part against her, and his face had assumed the most severeaspect of reproach; but her appearance gave an instantaneous change tohis whole mind, and countenance.
She halted, as if she feared to approach--he hesitated, as if he knew nothow to speak. Instead of the anger with which he was prepared to begin,his voice involuntarily softened, and without knowing what he said, hebegan,
"My dear Miss Milner."--
She expected he was angry, and in her confusion his gentleness was lostupon her. She imagined that what he said might be censure, and shecontinued to tremble, though he repeatedly assured her, that he meantonly to advise, not upbraid her.
"For as to all those little disputes between Mr. Sandford and you," saidhe, "I should be partial if I blamed you more than him--indeed, when youtake the liberty to condemn him, his character makes the freedom appearin a more serious light than when he complains of you--and yet, if heprovokes your retorts, he alone must answer for them; nor will Iundertake to decide betwixt you. But I have a question to ask you, andto which I require a serious and unequivocal answer. Do you expect LordFrederick in the country?"
Without hesitation she replied, "I do."
"One more question I have to ask, madam, and to which I expect a replyequally unreserved. Is Lord Frederick the man you approve for yourhusband?"
Upon this close interrogation she discovered an embarrassment, beyondany she had ever yet betrayed, and faintly replied,
"No, he is not."
"Your words tell me one thing," answered Dorriforth, "but your looksdeclare another--which am I to believe?"
"Which you please," was her answer, while she discovered an insulteddignity, that astonished, without convincing him.
"But then why encourage him to follow you hither, Miss Milner?"
"Why commit a thousand follies (she replied in tears) every hour of mylife?"
"You then promote the hopes of Lord Frederick without one seriousintention of completing them? This is a conduct against wh
ich it is myduty to guard you, and you shall no longer deceive either him oryourself. The moment he arrives, it is my resolution that you refuse tosee him, or consent to become his wife."
In answer to the alternative thus offered, she appeared averse to bothpropositions; and yet came to no explanation why; but left her guardianat the end of the conference as much at a loss to decide upon her truesentiments, as he was before he had thus seriously requested he might beinformed of them; but having stedfastly taken the resolution which hehad just communicated, he found that resolution a certain relief to hismind.
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