CHAPTER X.
Two whole days passed in the bitterest suspense on the part of MissMilner, while neither one word or look from Lord Elmwood, denoted themost trivial change of the sentiments he had declared, on the night ofthe masquerade. Still those sentiments, or intentions, were notexplicitly delivered; they were more like intimations, than solemndeclarations--for though he had said, "He would never reproach her _forthe future_," and that "She might expect they should part," he had notpositively said they should; and upon this doubtful meaning of hiswords, she hung with the strongest agitation of hope and of fear.
Miss Woodley seeing the distress of her mind, (much as she endeavouredto conceal it) entreated, nay implored of her, to permit her to be amediator; to suffer her to ask for a private interview with LordElmwood, and if she found him inflexible, to behave with a proper spiritin return; but if he appeared not absolutely averse to a reconciliation,to offer it in so cautious a manner, that it might take place withoutfarther uneasiness on either side. But Miss Milner peremptorily forbadethis, and acknowledging to her friend every weakness she felt on theoccasion, yet concluded with solemnly declaring, "That after what hadpassed between her and Lord Elmwood, _he_ must be the first to make aconcession, before she herself would condescend to be reconciled."
"I believe I know Lord Elmwood's temper," replied Miss Woodley, "and Ido not think he will be easily induced to beg pardon for a fault whichhe thinks _you_ have committed."
"Then he does not love me."
"Pshaw! Miss Milner, this is the old argument. He may love you too wellto spoil you--consider that he is your guardian as well as your lover, hemeans also to become your husband; and he is a man of such nice honour,that he will not indulge you with any power before marriage, to which hedoes not intend to submit hereafter."
"But tenderness, affection, the politeness due from a lover to hismistress demands his submission; and as I now despair of enticing, Iwill oblige him to it--at least I'll make the trial, and know my fate atonce."
"What do you mean to do?"
"Invite Lord Frederick to the house, and ask my guardian's consent forour immediate union; you will then see, what effect that will have uponhis pride."
"But you will then make it too late for him to be humble. If youresolve on this, my dear Miss Milner, you are undone at once--you maythus hurry yourself into a marriage with a man you do not love, and themisery of your whole future life may be the result. Or, would you forceMr. Dorriforth (I mean Lord Elmwood) to another duel with my LordFrederick?"
"No, call him Dorriforth," answered she, with the tears stealing fromher eyes; "I thank you for calling him so; for by that name alone, is hedear to me."
"Nay, Miss Milner, with what rapture did you not receive his love, asLord Elmwood!"
"But under this title he has been barbarous; under the first, he was allfriendship and tenderness."
Notwithstanding Miss Milner indulged herself in all these softbewailings to her friend--before Lord Elmwood she maintained a degree ofpride and steadiness, which surprised even him, who perhaps thought lessof her love for him, than any other person. She now began to fear shehad gone too far in discovering her affection, and resolved to maketrial of a contrary method. She determined to retrieve that haughtycharacter which had inspired so many of her admirers with passion, andtake the chance of its effect upon this only one, to whom she everacknowledged a mutual attachment. But although she acted this characterwell--so well, that every one but Miss Woodley thought her inearnest--yet, with nice and attentive anxiety, she watched even theslightest circumstances that might revive her hopes, or confirm herdespair. Lord Elmwood's behaviour was calculated only to produce thelatter--he was cold, polite, and perfectly indifferent. Yet, whatever hismanners now were, they did not remove from her recollection what theyhad been--she recalled, with delight, the ardour with which he had firstdeclared his passion to her, and the thousand proofs he had since givenof its reality. From the constancy of his disposition, she depended thatsentiments like these were not totally eradicated; and from the extremedesire which Mr. Sandford now, more than ever, discovered ofdepreciating her in his patron's esteem--from the now, more than commonzeal, which urged him to take Lord Elmwood from her company, wheneverhe had it in his power, she was led to believe, that while his friendentertained such strong fears of his relapsing into love, she had reasonto indulge the strongest hopes that he would.
But the reserve, and even indifference, that she had so well assumed fora few days, and which might perhaps have effected her design, she hadnot the patience to persevere in, without calling levity to their aid.She visited repeatedly without saying where, or with whom--kept laterhours than usual--appeared in the highest spirits--sung, laughed, andnever heaved a sigh--but when she was alone.
Still Lord Elmwood protracted a resolution, that he was determined hewould never break when taken.
Miss Woodley was excessively uneasy, and with cause; she saw her friendwas providing herself with a weight of cares, that she would soon findinfinitely too much for her strength to bear--she would have reasonedwith her, but all her arguments had long since proved unavailing. Shewished to speak to Lord Elmwood upon the subject, and (unknown to her)plead her excuse; but he apprehended Miss Woodley's intention, andevidently shunned her. Mr. Sandford was now the only person to whom shecould speak of Miss Milner, and the delight he took to expatiate on herfaults, was more sorrow to her friend, than not to speak of her at all.She, therefore, sat a silent spectator, waiting with dread for the timewhen she, who now scorned her advice, would fly to her in vain forcomfort.
Sandford had, however, said one thing to Miss Woodley, which gave her aray of hope. During their conversation on the subject, (not by way ofconsolation to her, but as a reproach to Lord Elmwood) he one dayangrily exclaimed, "And yet, notwithstanding all this provocation, hehas not come to the determination that he will think no more of her--helingers and he hesitates--I never saw him so weak upon any occasionbefore."
This was joyful hearing to Miss Woodley; still, she could not butreflect, the longer he was in coming to this determination, the moreirrevocable it would be, when once taken; and every moment that passed,she trembled lest it should be the very moment, in which Lord Elmwoodshould resolve to banish Miss Milner from his heart.
Amongst her unpardonable indiscretions, during this trial upon thetemper of her guardian, was the frequent mention of many gentlemen, whohad been her professed admirers, and the mention of them withpartiality. Teased, if not tortured, by this, Lord Elmwood still behavedwith a manly evenness of temper, and neither appeared provoked on thesubject, nor insolently careless. In a single instance, however, thiscalmness was near deserting him.
Entering the drawing-room, one evening, he started, on seeing LordFrederick Lawnly there, in earnest conversation with Miss Milner.
Mrs. Horton and Miss Woodley were both indeed present, and LordFrederick was talking in an audible voice, upon some indifferentsubjects; but with that impressive manner, in which a man never fails tospeak to the woman he loves, be the subject what it may. The moment LordElmwood started, which was the moment he entered, Lord Frederick arose.
"I beg your pardon, my Lord," said Lord Elmwood, "I protest I did notknow you."
"I ought to entreat your Lordship's pardon," returned Lord Frederick,"for this intrusion, which an accident alone has occasioned. Miss Milnerhas been almost overturned by the carelessness of a lady's coachman, inwhose carriage she was, and therefore suffered me to bring her home inmine."
"I hope you are not hurt," said Lord Elmwood to Miss Milner, but hisvoice was so much affected by what he felt that he could scarcearticulate the words. Not with the apprehension that she was hurt, washe thus agitated, for the gaiety of her manners convinced him _that_could not be the case, nor did he indeed suppose any accident, of thekind mentioned, had occurred; but the circumstance of unexpectedlyseeing Lord Frederick had taken him off his guard, and being totallyunprepared, he could not conceal indications of the surprise, and of thes
hock it had given him.
Lord Frederick, who had heard nothing of his intended union with hisward, (for it was even kept a secret, at present, from every servant inthe house) imputed this discomposure to the personal resentment he mightbear him, in consequence of their duel; for though Lord Elmwood hadassured the uncle of Lord Frederick, (who once waited upon him on thesubject of Miss Milner) that all resentment was, on his part, entirelyat an end; and that he was willing to consent to his ward's marriagewith his nephew, if she would concur; yet Lord Frederick doubted thesincerity of this, and would still have had the delicacy not to haveentered Lord Elmwood's house, had he not been encouraged by Miss Milner,and emboldened by his love. Personal resentment was therefore theconstruction he put upon Lord Elmwood's emotion on entering the room;but Miss Milner and Miss Woodley knew his agitation to arise from a fardifferent cause.
After his entrance, Lord Frederick did not attempt once to resume hisseat, but having bowed most respectfully to all present, he took hisleave; while Miss Milner followed him as far as the door, and repeatedher thanks for his protection.
Lord Elmwood was hurt beyond measure; but he had a second concern, whichwas, that he had not the power to conceal how much he was affected. Hetrembled--when he attempted to speak, he stammered--he perceived his faceburning with confusion, and thus one confusion gave birth to another,till his state was pitiable.
Miss Milner, with all her assumed gaiety and real insolence, had not,however, the insolence to seem as if she observed him; she had only theconfidence to observe him by stealth. And Mrs. Horton and Miss Woodley,having opportunely begun a discourse upon some trivial occurrences, gavehim time to recover himself by degrees--yet, still it was merely bydegrees; for the impression which this incident had made, was deep, andnot easily to be erased. The entrance of Mr. Sandford, who knew nothingof what had happened, was however, another relief; for he began aconversation with him, which they very soon retired into the library toterminate. Miss Milner, taking Miss Woodley with her, went directly toher own apartment, and there exclaimed in rapture,
"He is mine--he loves me--and he is mine for ever."
Miss Woodley congratulated her upon believing so, but confessed sheherself "Had her fears."
"What fears?" cried Miss Milner: "don't you perceive that he loves me?"
"I do," said Miss Woodley, "but that I always believed; and, I think, ifhe loves you now, he has yet the good sense to know that he has reasonto hate you."
"What has good sense to do with love?" returned Miss Milner--"If a loverof mine suffers his understanding to get the better of his affection--"
The same arguments were going to be repeated; but Miss Woodleyinterrupted her, by requiring an explanation of her conduct as to LordFrederick, whom, at least, she was treating with cruelty, if she onlymade use of his affection to stimulate that of Lord Elmwood.
"By no means, my dear Miss Woodley," returned she--"I have, indeed, donewith my Lord Frederick from this day; and he has certainly given me theproof I wanted of Lord Elmwood's love; but then I did not engage him tothis by the smallest ray of hope. No; do not suspect me of that, whilemy heart was another's: and I assure you, seriously, that it was fromthe circumstance we described he came with me home--yet, I must own, thatif I had not had this design upon Lord Elmwood's jealousy in idea, Iwould have walked on foot through the streets, rather than have sufferedhis rival's civilities. But he pressed his services so violently, and myLady Evans (in whose coach I was when the accident happened) pressed meso violently to accept them, that he cannot expect any farther meaningfrom this acquiescence than my own convenience."
Miss Woodley was going to reply, when she resumed,
"Nay, if you intend to say I have done wrong, still I am not sorry forit, when it has given me such convincing proofs of Lord Elmwood's love.Did you see him? I am afraid you did not see how he trembled? and thatmanly voice faltered, as mine does sometimes--his proud heart was humbledtoo, as mine is now and then. Oh! Miss Woodley, I have beencounterfeiting indifference to _him_--I now find that all _his_indifference to _me_ has been counterfeit, and that we not only love,but love equally."
"Suppose this all as you hope--I yet think it highly necessary that yourguardian should be informed, seriously informed, it was mere accident(for, at present, that plea seems but as a subterfuge) which broughtLord Frederick hither."
"No, that will be destroying the work so successfully begun. I will notsuffer any explanation to take place, but let my Lord Elmwood act justas his love shall dictate; and now I have no longer a doubt of itsexcess, instead of stooping to him, I wait in the certain expectation ofhis submission to me."
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