Sometimes it was just easier to give in, and today was one of those days.
As she sighed and turned her attention back to her computer, she got a group text from Elizabeth:
Ladies, this is your official save the date: Carmel, June 1. Heather’s out, but her new cottage is in! Carmen, please be the planner! Pretty please?
Aw, Heather was out. Too bad. She knew their little group of five had its tensions, but it wouldn’t be the same without Heather. Sara was well aware that Martha and Carmen had their issues with Heather, but Sara kind of admired her. She could be difficult, sure, but look at what she had done with her life. It was amazing, really. And Heather had always shared her success with her old friends. When they had all gotten together in Chicago, Heather had put them up at the Four Seasons. Sara had really enjoyed that weekend, even though Martha had gotten bent out of shape when Heather tried to encourage her to stick with her career. Maybe Carmen and Martha were just pea green. Understandable.
Sara responded to Elizabeth’s text:
Of course, I’m in. But I can’t plan it, you guys. I plead temporary insanity. Ha! Get it, it’s a lawyer joke!
HEATHER
From Heather Hall’s Twitter
Heather Hall @therealheatherhall · March 5
Mark your calendars for September 1 #projectlaunch #whatsholdingyouback
← Reply Retweet ♥ Favorite ··· More
ELIZABETH
After the awkward lunch at Harbor House, Elizabeth spent the rest of the week grinding away as usual. Today was Friday, though, and she didn’t want to spend even one more minute thinking about the office. She needed a little fun and was going to book a surprise vacation for her and William at the end of the month.
Maybe Paris. Whatever the destination, she had already lined up William’s parents to take care of George. She needed the break and couldn’t wait to tell William. And Paris would be a great place to get pregnant.
She was clicking around the Air France website when she heard a familiar—and unwelcome—sound coming through her office door.
“Hey there,” Kenny called.
Elizabeth grimaced and swiveled towards the door. “Hey, Kenny, what’s up?” she asked.
“Well, I was thinking we should get a weekly meeting on the schedule. You know, make sure I’m up to speed and all. Hey, we don’t want to disappoint Joe.”
“Sure, Kenny,” Elizabeth replied tightly. Couldn’t he wait at least a week before trying to take over her job? “Why don’t you speak with my assistant on your way out? Let’s start with monthly and see how it goes.”
“Sounds good,” Kenny said as he slowly eased his way out of her door.
Elizabeth was going to have to keep her eye on him.
CARMEN
It was the first Friday of the month. That meant Carmen was driving down to the city to see her new fertility specialist, Dr. Lee.
Dr. Lee’s office was on the seventy-third floor. She parked and made her way through to the clinic.
“Good morning, Mrs. Jones!” enthused the receptionist. “Please sign in on the iPad and take a seat. Dr. Lee will be with you shortly. The client satisfaction coordinator is at his desk to the left and will be pleased to meet your every need.”
Right, thought Carmen, every need except the most basic one. The need for another baby.
The really frustrating thing was that she was in a group for which no one felt much pity. She already had a baby. She wasn’t childless. And Mark had provided an exceptional quality of life for her and Avery. The relationship wasn’t always great (when Mark managed to find time for it at all), but she wasn’t divorced. And that was something, she supposed.
“Mrs. Jones, your turn,” a young nurse announced.
Carmen was escorted to a beautifully appointed room in the back of the clinic with an acupuncture table at the center. The young nurse took her vitals, reviewed her journal, made some notes, and prepared her for the procedure.
Fifteen minutes later, the needles were sliding in.
“Good afternoon, Carmen,” said Dr. Lee. “How have you been in the last month?”
“The same,” Carmen said. “I’ve been following your instructions. But I can’t say that anything is different.”
“It takes time. And patience. And belief. This process is all about faith. Now try to relax. I’ll be back in twenty minutes. And no phones.” He looked suspiciously at her purse.
Carmen just smiled in response, electing to keep her thoughts about Dr. Lee’s time and faith to herself. It was her strongly held suspicion that for Dr. Lee it was all about the cold hard cash. But she was desperate. And desperate women did desperate things, like treat their body as if it were a pin cushion. She wasn’t sure that any of this would do a thing. But she was willing to give it a try.
None of the doctors had been able to explain why she couldn’t have another baby. Mark had been tested years ago and passed with flying colors. And all of her tests had come back clean. So there was really no explanation. Mark refused to do IUI or IVF or anything else that was on the infertility menu. So Carmen was left with Dr. Lee. But she had socked away some money in the household account and quietly frozen her eggs ten years ago, just in case she really did run out of time.
As Carmen lay on the table and tried to relax, she heard her phone buzz.
Shit.
Trying not to move, she reached her arm down to the floor and felt for her purse. She managed to locate her phone and lifted it above her head to put it on speaker. She couldn’t put it next to her face without hitting one of the needles. It was Martha.
“I’m with Dr. Lee, and I can’t really talk,” she whispered into the receiver.
“But I really need to talk, please?” begged Martha.
“Okay, fine, but be quiet,” hissed Carmen.
As Carmen tried to hold the phone aloft, she listened to Martha’s entire story about the boys, and the dean, and pulling hair, and potty training.
When Martha finally took a breath, Carmen replied, “So we agree then it makes sense to wait a little on the job, right?”
“Yes, I guess,” answered Martha. “I’m just disappointed. You understand.”
“Of course I understand,” said Carmen softly. “Don’t you remember the day I decided to keep Avery? I mean, that was a pretty fucking huge compromise. But it was also my best moment in a lot of ways.”
“Absolutely, I remember,” said Martha. “You were so strong, Carmen. I still can’t believe Mark didn’t stay back in Hanover for our senior year. I mean, come on. You were pregnant and alone.”
“Martha, that’s not fair, he needed to be successful at the bank, and New York was too far of a commute. Look, I graduated and we got married, so what else could I have asked for? I wasn’t exactly the love of his life. As you will remember, Mark was supposed to be the fun senior frat guy. But we’ve made the best of it, and I can’t complain. And I wasn’t alone. I had you guys.”
But Carmen hadn’t had them, not really. Avery was born in New York shortly after the girls graduated. None of them were able to visit her in the hospital. Elizabeth and Sara had already gone back home to get ready for law school in the fall. Martha was gearing up for med school. Everyone had big plans. Everyone except for Carmen. It had been a hard, lonely time.
“I don’t know, Carmen. I still say he could have done better. But you’re right, Mark did the right thing in the end. And I know you love him, Carmen. I just think you deserve perfect happiness,” said Martha.
“Well, maybe these treatments will finally do some good,” said Carmen, not wanting to get into a conversation about Mark with Martha. Maybe she should talk to her friend, though, about what was going on with Mark. Martha was probably the only one that knew almost the whole truth. That Carmen’s marriage to Mark was one of compromise. That Carmen had pushed away her disappointment and concentrated on Avery’s success and her own plans for a bigger family that she could pour all her energy and love into. That even there she had f
ailed because her plan for a big, busy family with Mark had not materialized. That maybe her mom had been right all those years ago on her graduation weekend.
It had been a disaster of a weekend. Carmen hadn’t told her parents about the pregnancy (much less the marriage) until a few weeks before graduation weekend. She hadn’t been showing at Christmas break and had fabricated a reason not to come home over spring break. Her parents also hadn’t even met Mark. The only thing they thought they knew for sure about him was that he didn’t care enough about their daughter to show up for her graduation. Carmen assured them that Mark had been a stand-up guy and that they had married a few months before, but that seemed to make her mother even sadder.
At the end of the graduation weekend, she had planned to meet her parents for breakfast at Lou’s. Before the food even hit the table, her parents asked her if she would consider coming home and raising the baby there instead of going to New York, “which was no place for a human, much less a baby.” They were concerned that Mark’s family would never accept a half-Hispanic wife or even a quarter-Hispanic daughter. Carmen told them that they were being ridiculous—this wasn’t 1965, and it wasn’t Texas. But they weren’t convinced and thought she should get a quick divorce, cut her losses, and start over in Texas.
That idea seemed ridiculous to Carmen, but her mother insisted, “You’ll see, honey. Time will tell. He’s not the man for you. And you will be so lonely by yourself in a tiny apartment with a baby and no help. And your poor baby. What will come of her?”
Carmen had hated it when her mom turned out to be right, at least about the alone part. She might have nailed Mark, time would tell, but she had been very wrong about Avery. On that score, the proof was in the pudding. Avery was in her first year at her mother’s alma mater. And things would be different for Avery.
“Martha,” Carmen continued, “I’ve been thinking that maybe I should stop trying for a baby.”
“What do you mean?” asked Martha. “You’re still young. Don’t give up. That’s not you.”
“I just wonder if maybe I’m still trying to make something work that’s not meant to be.”
“Carmen, I’m going to need to go,” interjected Martha suddenly.
“Oh, okay,” said Carmen, disappointed that she wasn’t going to get a chance to talk about Mark now that she had gotten up the courage to broach the topic. But this was always Martha’s way. Always something happening. “I’ll call you later I guess.”
“Yeah, no, Carmen, I’m going to need you to come to the hospital. Like right now. My water just broke.”
“Yes!” screamed Carmen with excitement. “We’re having a baby!” She sat up abruptly and starting pulling the needles out of her arms.
At the noise, Dr. Lee burst back into the room.
“What are you doing?” he demanded, fixing a glare on the cell phone in Carmen’s left hand.
“We are having a baby! Like right now!” she shouted as she pulled out the last of the needles and pushed past him out the door.
As she exited the office, she heard Dr. Lee ask the receptionist to make a referral for her to a psychiatrist.
As she rushed back to her car, Carmen clicked open her phone to make a note to call Dr. Lee back and explain. She noticed a text from Elizabeth and Sara.
Elizabeth: Ladies, this is your official save the date: Carmel, June 1. Heather’s out, but her new cottage is in! Carmen, please be the planner! Pretty please?
Sara: Of course, I’m in. But I can’t plan it, you guys. I plead temporary insanity. Ha! Get it, it’s a lawyer joke!
Of course they wanted her to plan the weekend. Some things never change. She texted back:
Fine. But you fancy lawyers are ponying up for the booze. Also, get your shit together and get over to the hospital. We’re having a baby!!! No excuses, Sara!
MARTHA
“You’ve got this, honey—one more push!” encouraged the petite blond nurse who was so young that Martha doubted she had yet experienced the pleasure of being anchored to a bed by an IV and paralyzed from the waist down.
The OB at the foot of the bed wasn’t Martha’s regular doctor. This baby was coming early—and quickly—and her new Wisconsin OB wasn’t able to get there on time.
And Robert was going to miss it. Again.
He had been traveling when Bobby was born a few weeks earlier than expected. All of their doctor friends had assured them that first babies were always late. Nope.
He’d also missed Jack’s birth because he had a presentation scheduled the same day Martha went into labor, and he just couldn’t cancel. Hundreds of doctors had come to hear him speak about his research.
So here she was again, alone in labor for the third time. Goddammit, she should have just stayed in Boston. At least her mom and dad would be around. The only thing currently keeping her company was the neighboring cornfield. No, that’s not entirely accurate, she reminded herself. She was here in labor with this doctor who was a stranger to her and her new “friend,” Tiffany, the teenage nurse. She couldn’t be sure, but she thought Tiffany had a tiny T tattoo on the back of her neck. At least she hoped it was a just a T.
In Robert’s defense, Martha’s baby was almost three weeks early this time, and Robert had thought he would have time for a quick business trip. He had left on Wednesday and promised to be back by the end of the day Friday. Several hours too late, it turned out.
Martha heard a commotion at the door. Maybe he had made it after all. But then she heard, “I am family, Tiffany, is it?” and she knew everything was going to be okay.
Carmen rushed in, grabbed Martha’s hand, turned to the OB, and demanded, “Are we doing this now or what?”
Martha sighed and gave one more push. And then she heard her baby cry.
“It’s a girl!” Tiffany proclaimed as she hovered over the OB’s shoulder.
“It’s a girl!” screamed Carmen.
“Carmen, please don’t scream,” said Martha, but she didn’t really mean it. A girl. If she weren’t so tired, she would scream it herself.
As Carmen pulled out her phone for pictures, Tiffany took the baby to be weighed and cleaned up. “She’s a beautiful little thing! Just five pounds even!”
That’s small, thought Martha, with quiet worry.
“Tiffany, let me know if you need anything else,” said the OB brusquely as he headed for the door. “And please inform all our guests about the visiting policies,” he said as he shot Carmen a dirty look.
Shitty bedside manner, thought Martha. I never treated a patient like that.
After a few minutes, the nurse brought the baby over to Martha, and Martha’s worry evaporated as she got the first glimpse of her daughter. Tiffany gently placed the baby on Martha’s chest, and just then the cloud outside the hospital window passed, and the late afternoon sunlight burst into the room. Martha stared into her daughter’s blue eyes and stroked her hand over the little tuft of pale hair on her crown. Finally, a baby that looked like her. The boys both had darker hair and eyes like Robert.
This was her baby.
She and Robert had been talking about names for the last month or two. Martha was adamant that the baby’s name, boy or girl, include her maiden name, Adams, to honor her side of the family. She only had a sister, and she knew her parents had some lingering sadness that the Adams name was not going to be brought forth into the next generation. This was her chance to fix that, if only a little bit, and in a great sort of feminist way. Robert had agreed to the idea if it was limited to the baby’s middle name, but he’d insisted the first name should be Irish to represent his side of the family.
But Robert isn’t here, is he? thought Martha.
“Her name is Lucy Adams West,” she announced to Tiffany and Carmen.
“What a beautiful name!” Tiffany responded. “I’ll go get her bassinet—be right back!” Carmen followed her out, making a series of demands beginning with a Diet Coke and chocolate cake for Martha.
Martha and Lucy
were alone in the room.
“Hi, baby,” whispered Martha as she pulled her new baby close. “Your name is Lucy. Mommy picked it just for you. It was my grandmother Adams’s name. It means the bringer of light. My little ray of sunshine.”
Martha heard another voice outside her room, and she knew that she had more company.
“We are basically sisters, so I don’t think that rule would apply to me, Tiffany.” Elizabeth was here too.
Life was going to be good in Milwaukee.
SARA
Sara was trying to wrap things up for the week. She had gotten a text from Carmen that Martha had gone to the hospital. If it weren’t for Carmen’s texts, Sara and the rest of her friends would probably have no idea what was going on. It was funny. Since Martha had moved and Carmen had taken up her weekend home project, it felt like college all over again. Carmen had always been the town crier.
It was three o’clock, and Sara wanted to pick up the train to go up to Milwaukee and see Martha. Maybe if she was lucky, the baby would already be born. She knew this would seriously impair her credit with Scott for purposes of The Fight, but it would be worth it just for the newborn smell alone.
It was a Friday near the end of the quarter, and she should have known better.
She was putting the final touches on one of her long-term projects when the phone rang.
“Sara Beck,” she said curtly.
“Oh, thank God I found you,” the voice on the other end of the line said. “I have a contract emergency. If we don’t get this fixed, my numbers for the quarter are really going to be screwed. Please. You gotta help me. My back’s against the wall here.”
Sales guys. They always thought everything was an emergency. And it almost never was one. She sighed and reserved the last available conference room on the other side of the building. At least she would get her steps in. Her journey to size ten was that of ten thousand steps per day.
All the Right Mistakes Page 4