The funeral took place two days later and all my family’s friends were in attendance. The gloomy atmosphere suited the sad occasion and later, when everyone had left, we all silently sat down as a family for dinner.
The following day, we all seemed to mourn separately. It was as though we were all individually paying our respects to Greg in our own special way. Since Rex and I had to get back to New York, during our last night there when we were having dinner, I announced it to my family. They seemed more than understanding, which made it easy for us to leave.
I didn’t want to bother Amelia, and after our last conversation, I thought it would be easier to take a commercial plane back home.
The following morning, I was back to work. Since I was desperate to keep myself occupied in order to avoid depressing thoughts, I called my professors and informed them I was ready to resume with my studies.
After that, I went to see Mrs. Gallagher in order to report back to work. She’d taken up some of my responsibilities and I wanted to let her know I was back in full swing.
I found her talking to that odd man who’d almost walked in on us. I still had no idea who he was and though I was a bit curious, I mostly just wanted to resume with my duties and try and move on with my life.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to interrupt,” I said as my gaze immediately settled on Mrs. Gallagher who seemed a bit tense as she sat behind her desk.
My gaze moved to the odd man, who was watching me now. He was tall and scrawny and though he didn’t appear intimidating, there was something about him that felt a bit off.
“Eric, would you give us a minute,” Mrs. Gallagher said.
I did not fail to notice that she addressed him by his first name.
“Sure,” he had a small smile as he walked past me, which left me a little confused.
“I just wanted to report back to work,” I said.
She got to her feet and came around her desk. “How are you doing?” she asked.
“I’m fine, just eager to resume with my responsibilities.”
“Olivia.”
I didn’t imagine hearing her say my name after those difficult few days would affect me so much. “Please,” I said softly.
“I’ve lost someone close to me. I know how hard it is,” she said.
“Then you know that I need to focus my mind on something otherwise I’ll go insane.”
“I know,” she said in a low voice that almost sounded like a whisper. “But Olivia, don’t you want to talk about it?”
I knew she was trying to be helpful and I wished I could respond to her the way she wanted me to, but after all this time of being bold, brave and strong, I was just coming to realize that it wasn’t a façade anymore.
I wasn’t being this person for her. I was being this person for me. I was myself. I was brave, strong and confident. It had nothing to do with her anymore. This was the person I’d become and I was not going to submit to weakness any longer.
“That’s the thing about friends, Mrs. Gallagher. I don’t have to talk about it, they just …understand. That’s why Rex is my best friend.”
She observed me for a few moments then nodded. “I’ll forward everything to you in a moment,” she said.
“Thank you.” I walked out before she could respond because I wanted to believe that I was stronger than this.
“Ms. Williams.”
I came to a startling halt right outside Mrs. Gallagher’s door when the odd man said my name.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he said.
I quickly composed myself. “Sir?” I said.
“I’m Eric Gardner. Amelia’s cousin,” he said.
I raised my eyebrow, wondering if they were distant cousins because there was no trace of family resemblance. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. It’s nice to meet you,” I said.
“It’s nice to meet you too.”
We shook hands and when I went to pull away, it almost felt like he lingered a bit.
“You’re her—. Her personal assistant, is that right?” he asked.
“Yes, sir.”
He nodded as if satisfied by my answer and I headed back to my office.
I got right back to work and Mrs. Gallagher forwarded me notes and everything else I needed to know about what had happened in my absence. It was a busy day, and I was glad for it because I hardly had time to focus on the negative.
When I was preparing to leave for my evening classes, I was interrupted by a knock on my door. I opened to find two gentlemen clad in police uniform standing on the opposite side.
“Pardon me, Ma’am. I’m looking for Olivia Williams,” one of them said.
“I’m Olivia Williams,” I said, wondering what this was about.
“I’m Officer Garret, this is Officer Spade. We’d like to talk to you about Gregory Williams’ accident. Would you mind if we come in for a moment?”
“My brother’s accident?”
“Yes, Ma’am.” The other policeman, Officer Spade, said.
“Uh, what’s—. What’s going on?” I asked as I let them in.
“Ms. Williams, I’m sorry to tell you this but it seems there was some sort of foul play involved in your brother’s accident,” Officer Garret said.
His words were so unexpected, I didn’t respond for a while.
“Ma’am, do you understand?” Officer Spade asked.
“I’m sorry, what exactly do you mean?” I asked.
“Someone tampered with the brakes of your brother’s car,” Officer Garret said.
I took in his words and once I understood what they meant I asked, “Are you saying—. Are you saying that Greg was murdered?”
“Yes, Ma’am,” he said.
I felt like my feet lost their balance as I staggered back in denial.
“We’re looking further into the investigation and we’d like to know if there was anyone you might have been aware of, who had any motive to kill him,” Officer Spade said.
My heartbeat had increased pace. I could hear the officers but it was like I couldn’t comprehend their words. Who would want to kill Greg? He’d been in New York for such a short period of time.
“Ma’am?”
“He came to visit me from St. Paul, Minnesota, a few weeks ago. We hadn’t seen each other in years since I moved here for school. I don’t know who would have wanted to hurt him.” Even if he’d crossed me, I wouldn’t have attempted to physically harm him.
“And you don’t know if he had any enemies? Someone who might have seen him as a threat?”
I shook my head. “No sir,” I said.
“Okay, Ma’am. Thanks for your time. Here’s my number incase you remember anything,” Officer Spade said as he handed me his card.
After they were gone, the last question replayed itself in my head. And you don’t know if he had any enemies? Someone who might have seen him as a threat?
He’d been a threat to me but I hadn’t had anything to do with his accident. Oh, God. Had Greg owed money to some dangerous criminals? Was that why he’d been blackmailing me for a quarter million dollars? No, no that couldn’t be it. He’d been petty, but he never would have gotten himself involved in criminal activities.
Did it have anything to do with me? But how could it? The only person who’d known about Greg and his blackmail had been Rex and Amelia. Wait a minute, Amelia. Was she? No! I rejected the thought the moment it attempted to enter my mind.
Greg had probably gotten himself involved with some bad people and he’d ended up in trouble. There was no way his murder had anything to do with me. He must have gotten himself involved in shady dealings during his time in New York.
After thinking about it for a long time, I decided it’d just be easier to let the officers do their investigations. Until then, I would not rattle my family with the news. They had just laid a loved one to rest, to think someone had actually played a role in it would tarnish their image of Greg and destroy them.
“May I tal
k to you for a minute?” I said the following day. I’d just dropped off some files in Mrs. Gallagher’s office and was on my way out when I decided to tell her about what I’d learned.
“Sure,” she said.
I walked back over to her desk and tried to think of a way to put it. When she got to her feet, I took a breath and said, “Last night some police officers came to see me.”
“Oh? About what?”
She looked concerned, but I tried not to let myself get distracted. “They came to see me about Greg. They said his brakes were tampered with, that his accident wasn’t an accident. It was premeditated murder.”
She was speechless for a while but I didn’t blame her. I’d reacted in a similar fashion at the news.
“Do they know who’s responsible?” she asked.
I watched her for a minute then slowly shook my head.
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too,” I said as I turned to leave.
“Olivia,”
I took another breath and faced her.
“Do you think I had something to do with it?”
I shook my head. “No, I don’t think you’d cause me or my family any harm.”
She pressed her lips together and slowly nodded. After a moment, she came around her desk and approached me. I stood still, calculating the distance from where I was standing, to the door.
“It must’ve been devastating for you to learn about Greg so soon after everything else you’ve been through,” she said.
I wondered if everything else incorporated her breaking my heart. “He had his faults, but he didn’t deserve to go that way.”
“Do you know anyone who would’ve wanted to hurt him?”
I exhaled in an attempt to release some of the overwhelming emotions I was keeping at bay. “No, we weren’t close. I had no idea where he went after he came to see me. I didn’t care to find out. I just wanted him gone.” I tightened my jaw, closed my eyes and told myself to breathe. “But not like this.” I could sense her presence even before she touched my face.
“Olivia, I hope you don’t blame yourself for any of this,” she said.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course, it does.”
I opened my eyes and was a little surprised to see just how close she was standing next to me. “It’s not your fault,” she said.
“If I’d never sent that stupid cheque home—”
“You never would have known your father had been sick, you never would have made the time to go see your family. Livvy, his coming here prompted you to pay closer attention to what was happening back home. If you think you put this whole thing into motion, you couldn’t be more wrong.”
I took a deep breath as I let her words sway me and she gently took me in her arms. I relaxed in her embrace and clasped my arms around her. She felt like heaven and for the first time in the last few days, I felt safe, warm and less burdened.
When we pulled apart, she lightly ran her fingers over my cheek and my heart started its ridiculous dance of palpitation. God, would that ever stop? She moved tresses of my hair from my face and I released a shaky breath. I wanted her with every fragment of my being.
I leaned in, unsure of whether or not she’d pull me in or push me away, but she surprised me when she met me halfway and pressed her lips against mine. The kiss was intimately slow, but the heat growing in me was driving me to want to demand more.
The reminder that I couldn’t, that this was all we’d probably ever have had me exercising my self-restraint. I broke the kiss and physically pulled away from her, creating a proper amount of distance between us as my mind started working again.
“I’d like you to transfer me to an office at Price Healthcare,” I said, unsure of where the words came from.
“What?” she asked.
I tried to put my thoughts together and said, “I can’t continue to work this closely to you. Every time I see you, I fall deeper in love with you. Every time I’m close to you, all I can think about is how much I’d love to take you in my arms and make love to you. I can’t stop loving you. It’s not a reversible thing that I can will myself to do. But I can force myself to bury it somewhere deep within myself and in order for me to do that, I need to distance myself from you.” I swallowed a painful ball of air. What was I doing? Could I really go without seeing her for long periods of time?
“Olivia,”
“Please Amelia. It’s the only way.”
I could feel my heart breaking all over again, but I told myself this was the right thing to do. Amelia could never want me the way I wanted her. She had priorities which were more important than our affair.
“This is what you want?” she asked.
“No, but it’s what I need.”
She looked at me for a while then said, “I’ll make the necessary arrangements.”
A surge of emotions rushed through me. Did she have any idea how hard this was for me? Did she have it in her to want to fight for me?
I wanted her to tell me she’d work something out; that she wanted to be with me, that all she needed was time, but her answer was plain and simple.
“Thank you,” I said and walked out of her office.
I told myself I wouldn’t cry as I went back to my office. I sat down on my chair and stared at the laptop screen, then slowly, tears blurred my vision. I promised myself this was the last time I’d ever cry for her.
Chapter Fifty
It didn’t take long for me to transfer Olivia to Price Healthcare. Within a couple of days, everything had been taken care of. She had a nice large office with a private conference area where she could hold her meetings without having to go out and I made sure James was still available for her transportation.
It had been a week now since she’d left the office across from mine and now that she had taken over my responsibilities at Price Healthcare, I was looking for someone to fill her newly vacated position.
I needed someone to do what Olivia had been doing during her earlier time working for me, which included traveling, planning events and handling my schedule. I’d interviewed several people, but none of them met my standards.
I didn’t know why sometimes when my office door opened, I expected it to be Olivia. It was silly, but sometimes, my heart jumped then calmed in disappointment when it turned out to be someone else.
I knew I had treated her unfairly. She had been through so much and I was partly responsible for inflicting that pain when I’d rejected her. I had warned her there could never be more between us, but now I was disappointed in myself for not having done a better job of protecting her.
It hadn’t come by surprise when during our date she’d announced she was in love with me. I’d seen it in her eyes way before then. I’d denied it during that time but looking back, I now realized that a part of me had thrived in it, which was why I’d never stopped the affair or myself.
Olivia had been my guilty pleasure, and now that she was gone, it felt like she had been something a lot more. I’d never denied that I’d cared for her, but I’d never wanted to question the extent of that care.
After our last encounter at her apartment, I admit her brother threatening to expose whatever at the time he’d thought he’d known, had caused a tremor of panic, but it had made it easier for me to end things with Olivia.
We’d gone too far. Our affair, or whatever it had been, had never been supposed to see the light of day. But something, forces stronger than me had been in control and no matter what I’d told myself, that spark between us had turned to fireworks.
I felt horrible for hurting her because shortly after, her brother’s accident had taken place and then she’d lost him. I had wanted to be there for her, to somehow help ease her pain, but I’d only done what I’d been capable of, bringing her family to the hospital and making sure her brother was comfortable.
It had all seemed to happen so fast. Poor Olivia, seeing her at the hospital so sad and helpless had been so familiar and heartbreaki
ng. I’d seen my younger self in her when I’d lost Isabel. I’d wanted to reach out, but having ended things between us had cut off that privilege.
Every time I’d seen her after that, a sadness I couldn’t understand had taken root in me. I’d wanted to hold her, take away her pain and the excessive thought of her and what she’d been going through had made me angry at the world, angry at myself.
Our last encounter in my office had made me want so badly to shield her from her pain. I’d understood her need to want to push me away, but weirdly enough, I hadn’t liked it. I’d wanted her to speak to me in order to know what was going through her mind and when she’d opened up, she’d been so vulnerable. I’d just wanted to comfort her. I hadn’t planned on kissing her.
Her words after the kiss had startled me but I’d realized one thing, Olivia was far much stronger than I’d ever given her credit for, and that was how I was going to see and remember her, as a strong, brave soul.
The knock at my door pulled me from my reverie, and a moment later, Francis walked in. “Good afternoon, Madam,” he said.
“Good afternoon, Francis.”
“This just came for you by courier,” he said as he handed me an envelope.
“Did it say who it was from?”
“No, Ma’am.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
He bobbed his head and walked back out.
I placed the envelope on the desk and my thoughts unsuccessfully trailed back to Olivia. I remembered our lovely date. I hadn’t known what to expect but she’d managed to pleasantly surprise me.
The date had been perfect because everything she’d planned and everything we’d done had seamlessly unfolded, easily creating one of the most memorable and magical nights of my life.
My favorite part of the evening was when it had started raining. I’d never been spontaneous in my life. Dancing in the rain with Olivia and kissing as though nothing else would ever make me feel that soaring sense of freedom again, had been one of the most amazing experiences for me. After all, in the world I lived in, it was the little things that counted.
Cougar Boss Page 44