"Happy Christmas!" he announced in a voice that was too loud and too bright to be reasonable considering he'd just woken up. He yawned again and rubbed his eyes, before peering at them both. "I'm not missing anything, am I?"
"We were just talking," Seb said.
"And sleeping," Connor added in a distant, dreamy voice.
"Shame," Matt said petulantly. "I was dreaming about watching you two and was hoping to join in."
"I can tell," Connor said, wiggling his hips against Matt, a crooked smile spreading across his lips.
Matt wriggled closer, making Connor's eyes widen for a second.
"That wasn't the only dream I had," he told them.
Seb raised his eyebrows in a silent invitation for Matt to carry on.
"I dreamt I was fucking you while you were fucking Con."
Seb had to bite his lower lip to hold in the shuddering groan that wanted to escape. "Not today," he said breathlessly. "But yeah, I dreamt that too."
They both looked to Connor. Seb was holding his breath, and it seemed to him that Matt was too.
Connor's lips pressed together, his chin quivering as he suppressed a laugh. "Quit it with the puppy dog eyes." He sniggered. "I'm pretty sure that scenario can be arranged." He wriggled onto his back and placed a hand on each of their jaws, stroking his hands back and forth over their much more established stubble. "I think I'm probably the luckiest man alive."
"Nah," Matt said. "That's me."
"Oh, no," Seb said. "I get to claim that because I get to be in the middle of a hot, sexy, sandwich."
They all laughed at that, and then Seb and Matt both plunged in to cover Connor's face and chest in frenzied kisses, which left him laughing even harder.
Breathless, they lay still again, stroking one another gently.
"Don't you two have a turkey to cook?" Seb asked. "I was promised Christmas dinner with all the trimmings."
Matt waved his hand. "Yeah, yeah, we'll get round to it. I have no intentions of moving yet, though."
"Me neither," Connor agreed. He sighed. "Will it always be like this?"
"I hope so," Seb said, stroking his hand over Connor's chest. "It took us far too long to figure out we wanted each other. I have no intentions of letting either of you go."
"I don't just want you both," Matt said. "I love you both."
"Me three," Connor agreed. "On both counts."
"I'm glad we're in agreement," Seb said.
Lazy was the best word to describe their morning, but eventually they began to get up. Connor was the first to go get showered and dressed, leaving Seb and Matt to doze for a little longer. Seb had other ideas, ducking beneath the quilt to get to work on relieving Matt's morning hard-on with mouth and tongue. Then, while Matt went to shower, he lay basking in the bed, watching dust motes dance around in the stream of sunlight coming through the blinds.
Eventually, the scent of the turkey cooking wafted through the flat to his nostrils, enticing him out of bed, even though he knew it would be some time before dinner was ready. His eyes were met with a treat when he walked into the kitchen. Matt was standing at the breakfast bar, peeling potatoes. He was wearing rubber gloves and an apron that said 'Kiss the chef' on it. As far as Seb could tell, that was all Matt was wearing. Matt grinned at him and turned round, confirming Seb's suspicion.
"You said it would be better if all I had on were the gloves."
"I suggested the apron," Connor said, pausing from preparing vegetables. "A bit safer for cooking."
Seb laughed. He couldn't take his eyes off Matt's arse crack. One day, he told himself. One day he'd get his mouth on that glorious arse.
Matt turned back round and resumed his task. Seb perched on one of the stools at the breakfast bar, chatting with them as they carried on getting things ready.
"Done," Matt said proudly, popping the last of the cut potatoes into a pan of water so they didn't brown before they were ready to be cooked.
"There's not much more we can do for a while," Connor agreed. "We probably should have put the turkey on a lot earlier. It'll be late before we're eating."
"That's not a problem," Seb decided. "We can always have a late breakfast."
Connor snorted. "Breakfast? Have you seen the time?"
Seb glanced at the cooker clock. It was gone two. "Fair point," he laughed. "Lunch, then."
"Allow me!" Matt said with a grand flourish of his hand. "If I'm playing naked chef for the day, you might as well make the most of it."
"For the day?" Seb asked.
"Sure, why not? We're not expecting anyone else, are we?"
Seb shook his head. "Are you going to wear the apron all day?"
"Nah, only when I'm in here," Matt replied with a suggestive wink.
Seb adjusted his jeans. This really was turning out to be the best Christmas ever.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Matt
On Boxing Day, Connor drove them to Matt's mum's house. She'd laid out a full Christmas dinner for them, which left Matt groaning internally. They'd gorged themselves the previous and had gone to bed far too full. The last thing he wanted was to eat a similar amount of food for the second day in a row.
"You shouldn't have gone to all this trouble," he said through a fake smile.
"Nonsense. This is my Christmas Day."
He winced. If there was one thing his mum was good at, it was piling on the guilt. Her house was beautifully decorated with a massive tree dominating the lounge. Several presents sat underneath, wrapped in deep red paper with impressive gold bows. He frowned at the pile, knowing they couldn't all be for him. They were probably empty boxes, he decided, a pile of presents to make his mum's life feel less lonely in the absence of her husband or any sign of grandchildren. His chest ached at the thought, and he tried to rid his mind of it, but when he knelt down and investigated the gifts, he realised his suspicion was right.
"This one's yours," she said, coming up behind him. She handed him a small package, as carefully and lovingly wrapped as the fake ones.
"You shouldn't have."
"Don't be silly. I'm going to put the food out."
"Do you need a hand?" Connor asked.
She smiled at home. "I've already set the table, but you could pour drinks for everyone?"
"Sure."
She bustled out of the lounge, with Connor trailing in her wake, leaving Matt holding the unopened gift.
While they were alone in the room, Seb gave him a swift kiss. Matt hated that he felt uncomfortable with the contact. It was almost like they were teenagers again and he was expecting his mum to walk in any moment and catch them in the act. He'd been caught with a girlfriend in high school, when his mum had walked into his bedroom without knocking. Seb must have sensed his anxiety because he stepped away and stuffed his hands into his pockets.
"Sorry," Matt said gruffly.
"It's okay. I get it."
It wasn't okay, and Matt knew it. He was putting out signals that he was only comfortable with their relationship behind closed doors. He hoped that wasn't true.
"Aren't you going to open it?"
Matt stared down at the gift box. "I will, after dinner." He put it down on the mantlepiece and absently stared at the multitude of Christmas cards standing on every available surface. He never bothered writing cards for anyone, but he was glad his mum had plenty of friends who did.
"Everything's ready," Connor said from the doorway.
They followed him to the dining room, where Matt's mum was already starting to serve the food out. She heaped as much as would fit onto their plates; far more than Matt planned on eating, but he smiled and thanked her anyway.
They exchanged small talk for a while. His mum grilled them all on their work, amongst other trivial topics. He actually thought things were going well until his mum turned to Seb with a look of pity on her face.
"I was sorry to hear about you and Craig splitting up. You were together a long time, weren't you?"
Great way t
o rub salt in the wound, Mum. Matt ground his teeth together to make sure his sarcastic thoughts didn't slip out into tangibility.
"Five years," Seb replied with a faint smile. "It wasn't meant to be."
"The pair of you didn't think it was worth trying harder?"
"Mum," Matt hissed.
"Craig didn't give me much choice, Mrs Tuke."
"You didn't want to break up?"
Seb glanced at Matt and Connor and then drew in a deep breath. "It was unexpected. I was upset at the time, but I've come to realise that I can do better than Craig."
She looked down at her food, lips pursed for several seconds. "You seem to have got over him quickly." She shook her head, sighing. "Relationships are so transient these days, aren't they? So easily disposed of."
No one answered her. Matt had become rigid in his chair; his hands gripped his cutlery tightly. Silently, he willed her to shut up and go back to inconsequential small talk.
"How are your parents?" she asked Seb instead.
"They're well, Mrs Tuke. Thank you for asking."
She smiled, looked to Connor, sadness crinkling the skin around her eyes. "Christmas must be hard for you. I know it's hard for me." Her words were almost conspiratorial, like they had a shared experience.
"It's been a long time," Connor said quietly. "I think about Mum, obviously, but my grief isn't overwhelming anymore."
She nodded slightly, her gaze becoming distant for a few seconds. Maybe she was wondering when she would feel the same way. "Are you seeing anyone?" she asked. "Matt never talks about your girlfriends." Her gaze flicked to Seb and then back again. "Or boyfriends." She gave him a couple of seconds to respond, and when he didn't, she smiled at Matt. "I wish Matt would settle down with a nice girl," she said, dreamy-eyed.
"Mum," Matt breathed. "Can't we just enjoy dinner?"
"We are."
We're not. At least, he wasn't, and he doubted Seb and Connor were either.
"Can't I show an interest in you?" she asked. "I'm sure your parents like to know who you're seeing, Seb?"
"They tend to wait for me to volunteer information," Seb replied, his words slow and probably carefully chosen.
Matt's mum's expression became sour, her lips pinched together into a thin line. "Well…" Her voice was tight. "I see nothing wrong with wanting to know what's going on in Matt's life. One of you needs parents who are active in your lives."
"Mum!" Anger tightened Matt's muscles.
Connor pushed his plate away and turned away from them all. He had to be thinking about his dad. None of them even knew if the man was alive or dead. Matt hadn't even thought Connor cared, but his reaction was a clear indicator he did. Seb tapped his fork against the edge of his plate, his lips pressed into a thin line. Matt knew he had a good relationship with his parents, but Seb was probably biting his tongue so he didn't snap out a sarcastic retort.
"I am seeing someone," Matt said. It had been a rash thing to admit, but he hated the way his mum had made his friends feel awkward.
Her eyes widened. Seb and Connor both snapped their attention to him. There was no backtracking now. He could lie and say he was dating a woman and hope that Seb and Connor understood, or he could tell the truth and risk disappointing his mum.
"What's her name?" his mum asked. "Is she nice? When are you going to bring her to meet me? How long have you been seeing her? Is it serious?" Her questions came like the bullets from a semi-automatic, fast and piercing. "You could have brought her today. You did spend Christmas Day with her, didn't you?"
"I'm not seeing a woman," he said in a firm voice.
"But you just said—"
"I said I was seeing someone." He breathed in deeply, gathering as much courage as he could. He indicated Seb and Connor. "We're together."
Her expression went from hopeful to crestfallen to outraged, all in the blink of an eye. "You're not gay," she said flatly, her stare pinning him, forbidding him from looking at either of his lovers for support.
"I love them."
She snorted. "I think you're confusing friendship for something more." She clenched her jaw, her nostrils flaring as she continued to stare at him. "You realise polygamy is illegal? It's wrong."
Matt couldn't tell which revelation she was angriest at: that he loved a man or that he was involved with two. "Marrying more than one person might be," he snapped out. "Being in a relationship with more than one person isn't."
"Morally it is," she hissed.
Matt let out a bitter laugh. "Next you'll be telling me that same-sex relationships are wrong too."
She narrowed her eyes.
"Well, that's just fucking great."
"Language!"
"Really?" He pushed his chair back and stood. "You're judging me and my friends, revealing yourself to be a closet homophobe, and you think you have the right to chastise me for swearing?"
She stood, leaning on the table. "I am your mother. And I am not homophobic. Don't you dare put words into my mouth, Matthew." She curled her upper lip. "How long has this been going on?"
"A few weeks."
"And how many times have you seen me in those weeks? And yet you never thought to tell me you were shacking up with two men? That smacks of shame, Matthew." She folded her arms, a victorious smile on her lips. "Do you have any idea what people will think?"
"Does it matter?" Connor asked, drawing her attention to him. "We're not hurting anyone. We want to be together. We love each other. What we do isn't anyone else's business."
Matt smiled down at Connor. "Thanks," he said quietly. "Connor's right—"
"Right? Don't think you can hide from what other people will think. Any of you. You should all be ashamed of yourselves for carrying on like this." She shook her head. "Anyway, what would he know? His father walked out on him. Connor is hardly qualified to comment on what's normal or acceptable." Her gaze turned on Connor, eyes narrowed into sharp, unyielding daggers. "At least you don't have anyone left to disappoint with your behaviour."
Matt was too angry to speak. Beside him, Connor stood.
"Lovely meal, Mrs Tuke," he said in a strained voice. Then he turned and walked out.
Matt wanted to follow him. He even turned to go, but Seb was on his feet and blocking him before he could.
"I'll go," Seb said, his expression apologetic. "I think you and your mum need to at least try to sort things out."
Matt wasn't sure he wanted to. He was furious with her and angry at himself for not standing up for his lovers more vehemently.
Just then, the front door slammed, making him wince.
"You'll regret it if you don't," Seb whispered, running his fingers down Matt's arm. "We'll wait outside for you, okay?"
Matt nodded, knowing Seb was right. "Thanks," he muttered.
Seb went to leave the room.
"Do your parents know?" Matt's mum asked.
Seb half turned. "Yes."
"And?"
"They were supportive. All that matters to them is that I'm happy." He lifted his chin. "I'm sure once you're over the initial shock, you'll feel the same way." He nodded to Matt, not waiting for her to respond, and then headed out the door.
Matt clenched his fists at his sides. He waited until he heard the front door shut a second time, the sound quieter and more restrained than when Connor had left. Only then did he look at her.
"How could you?" he asked. "How could you treat any of us like that?"
"What you're doing is wrong."
"In your opinion," he snarled out. "And regardless of what you think about our relationship, you had no right to be that cruel to Connor. He went through hell when his coward of a father walked out on him and his mum. He had to hold everything together." He stared down his nose at her. "He deserves your respect, not your scorn."
She glared at him indignantly. It hurt that she couldn't even bring herself to offer him an apology; it was definitely too much to think she'd go and apologise to Connor and Seb.
"We love eac
h other," he told her. "Trust me, realising that came as a shock to me, too."
"Are you gay now?"
He shrugged. "I honestly don't know, Mum. All I know for certain is that I want to be with them. Both of them. It feels right."
She hissed in a breath and shook her head. "I can't support your relationship with them."
"Because they're men, or because there's two of them?"
He wasn't sure why he needed to know. His mum had never seemed to have a problem with Seb. She'd continued to welcome him into her home after he had come out and had treated him as she always had. Maybe the only issue she had was the possibility of her own son being gay.
"It's wrong," she said.
He nodded sadly. Her refusal to give a straight reply to his question was all the answer he needed. "I'm sorry you feel that way. But your opinion doesn't change anything. I'm not going to stop seeing them." He turned and walked to the door.
"Don't you dare walk out."
He hunched his shoulders, tears prickling his eyes. He put his hand on the door handle.
"Matthew." Her voice was shrill and desperate. "I love you."
"I love you too, Mum. But if you can't accept me for who I am and who I choose to be with, I'm not sure we have much to say to each other." He hated that things had turned out this way. He desperately wanted her to be as understanding and supportive as Seb's parents had been. He opened the door.
"I'm sorry," she said, halting him. "It was a shock. It still is a shock. You've never done anything to make me suspect that…" She breathed in and out slowly.
Matt wondered if she was counting to ten, like she'd made him do as a child, to stop herself saying anything else they'd both regret.
"I want you to be happy," she said at last.
He turned to face her. "I am."
"When your relationship becomes public knowledge, everyone will talk," she warned him. "People you thought were your friends might even shun you."
"We're not living in the fifties now, Mum. People are a lot more accepting and progressive."
"I think you'll be disappointed, Matt."
He sighed. "Maybe. Maybe not. But like Con said, we're not hurting anyone. The three of us being together doesn't affect anyone but us. If people are offended, it's their problem, not ours." And they'd deal with any negativity the same way they'd dealt with everything else since they'd become friends: together. "I'm not going to walk away on the best thing that's ever happened to me, just because I'm scared that people might not accept our relationship. No one has that much power over me, Mum. Not even you."
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