by S S Bazinet
“What do you mean?”
“Look at Elise.”
“Elise?” Annabel forced herself to forget her own worries long enough to snatch a glance at her friend. “I don’t understand. Elise was so happy a few minutes ago. Why is she looking like that? I’ve never seen that face on her before.”
“Remember how she instructed you to help her if she got upset?”
“Oh goodness, you’re right.”
“Perhaps we could go over and tell her that she needs to check on the pastries in the oven.”
* * * * *
Elise stood on the back porch shivering, but she knew it was for her own good. After only a few words from Claire, her temper had flared up, a brush fire of anger and indignation. She had to take deep breaths of the crisp, cold air to calm herself. When she felt better, she turned to Annabel. Her co-host was shivering too. “Thank you for that quick intervention, but get back in the house where it’s warm.”
Annabel nodded. “I’ll go get your coat.”
Carey opened the back door for Annabel and then stepped up to the railing. “Your party is wonderful, Elise, and the food is the best. I’m sorry that you’re upset.”
Elise stared back at the thoughtful, young man. “I should know better than let anyone make me react like I did, but I’ll be fine.”
“Is there anything I can do?”
Elise shook her head. “Go inside. I’ll join you shortly.”
Carey turned to leave just as Michael stepped out of the house. He was carrying Elise’s winter jacket and held it out so that she could put it on.
Elise felt warmer almost instantly. “Thank you. You’re always the gentleman, Michael.”
“Annabel was bringing you the coat, but I told her I wanted to talk to you,” Michael said. “Is that alright?”
“Of course, I always welcome your wisdom. Just don’t expect me to bounce back too quickly. Claire said some things that were very hurtful.”
Michael stared up at the night sky. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
Elise latched on to his arm. “I don’t understand some people. Take Arel, how could he stand by and let that woman insult me like that.”
“Do you want to tell me what she said?”
“Essentially, I’m a worthless hack.”
“Is that how she said it?”
“No, but after Arel told Claire that I was a romance writer, she gave me a look that you give something disgusting, like gum on the street. Then she informed me that my passion for writing was frivolous, that my fantasies about romance led people astray and that the money I earned could be going to a much better cause.”
“I see.”
Elise hugged his arm a little tighter. “And do you want to know the worst part? I think she absolutely believes every word that comes out of her mouth.”
“People believe a lot of things.”
“Yes, but here’s another scary fact. When I looked at those dark eyes of hers, I almost believed her too. Just thinking about her gives me a chill.”
“Do you want to go back inside?”
Elise laughed. “Please, not yet, I’m still venting.”
“About Claire?”
“No, I think I’m getting a handle on her, but Arel still makes me want to spit tacks.”
“Spit tacks?”
“That’s an old saying that my aunt used when she was angry. And Arel makes me furious. While Claire was spewing out her garbage, Arel wouldn’t even look at me. He actually closed his eyes and rubbed his temples as if he was the one who was being judged worthless.”
“Arel doesn’t have much experience when it comes to relationships. In this case—”
“In this case, he’s being totally manipulated.” Elise released Michael’s arm and grabbed hold of the railing. “I can’t understand what’s going through his head.”
“But you told me that you also suffered through some difficult relationships.”
“You’re right. I guess I was once as bad off as Arel. I let men order me around for a long time. Thankfully, I finally wised up.”
“And look at you now, Elise. Annabel says that you’ve been a wonderful friend. And as for your books, you give people ideas about relationships working out. You keep the idea of love alive with your stories.”
“So you think I’m more than a useless hack who’s pedaling dreams.”
Michael smiled back, but before he could comment, the door swung open.
Elise turned and saw Carey leaning out. She’d never seen him look so alarmed. “Is something wrong?”
Carey nodded. “I think you better come in. Annabel is very upset with Claire.”
* * * * *
Elise arrived in the living room just as Claire and Arel were headed towards the front door. Arel glanced back once, but then he continued trailing after his fiancé. Peggy, Carol, Tim and Kevin were all standing around Annabel, looking surprised but speechless. Even Freddie was acting strangely. He’d retreated to his doggie bed.
“What happened?” Elise asked as she hurried over to Annabel. “You’re shaking. Maybe you should sit down.”
Annabel’s cheeks were flushed a deep red and her pupils were wide and dark. She looked at Elise, but she didn’t say anything.
Elise took her arm and guided her over to the sofa. The others followed and crowded around the couch. Carol sat down next to Annabel.
Peggy stepped closer. “Listen to me, Annabel. You should be happy with yourself. Somebody had to put this Claire person in her place. She was rude and obnoxious to say the least.”
Carol put her hand on Annabel’s. “Peggy is right. In fact, if you hadn’t come to Carey’s rescue, I was definitely going to speak up.”
“What happened to Carey?” Elise felt a ping of anxiety as she glanced around and saw that her young friend was stationed away from the group. “Carey, what is Carol talking about? Did Claire say something inappropriate to you?”
When Carey shrugged, Kevin spoke up. “I don’t think Claire wanted anybody to hear her when she took Carey aside. But of course, we all have big ears here.”
Peggy agreed. “And it’s a good thing too. When Annabel found out what was going on, she insisted that Claire come clean about what she’d said to Carey.”
Annabel cleared her throat, but her voice was strained when she spoke. “Claire was awful. After she’d upset Elise, I didn’t know what she’d do next. When she approached Carey, I stayed close enough to hear her tell him some horrible things. I think she’s been waiting to talk to him about living in Arel’s house. She made it sound like he was a free-loader, taking advantage of Arel’s lenient attitude and contributing nothing to Arel or anyone else.”
Elise stiffened with her own outrage. “You’re right, Annabel. That is awful!”
In the months that she’d known Carey, Elise had found him to be sweet and thoughtful as anyone could be. To criticize him at all was a crime. To say the things that Claire said was totally unacceptable. She quickly went over to him, put her hands on her hips and eyed him with motherly concern. “Carey, don’t believe a word that woman said. As far as I’m concerned, you’re a blessing. Because of you and Michael, I’ve been able to change my life around. And if you ever need a place to live, you can stay with me. Is that clear?”
“Thank you, Elise, but please don’t worry. I’m fine,” Carey said.
“Are you sure?”
Carey smiled back. “Yes, I’m sure.”
Elise felt her shoulders drop a couple of inches. Carey, like Michael, had a healthy sense of himself. On the other hand, when she went back to check on Annabel, Annabel still looked very shaky. “Sweetie, please, tell us what you’re thinking.”
Annabel shrugged. “I know Claire was out of line, but I’ve never been this angry before. When I heard what she was saying, I couldn’t hold my feelings back. I started shouting, calling her callous and judgmental.”
Elise laughed. “Annabel, I’ve never seen anyone who tries as hard as you do. Maybe it’s t
ime you gave yourself some leeway. You said things that needed to be said.”
Carol smiled. “Elise is right. We all agree that you were great.”
Annabel lifted her eyes a little. “So nobody thinks I did anything wrong?”
“Absolutely not,” Peggy said in a firm tone.
Elise glanced around at her guests. They were all smiling back at Annabel. It was the perfect time to encourage the young woman to stand up and feel better about herself. “Listen, everyone, let’s forget about rude people and enjoy ourselves. Annabel and I wanted to make this party special, and we did our best in the kitchen. There are meatball appetizers, crab puffs, deviled eggs, dips, cheeses, and lots of other yummy stuff to eat. Will everyone indulge us? Try out our buffet and let us know what you think about our culinary skills?”
Kevin looked at Carol, then back at Elise. “I know that Carol and I will do our part.”
Tim hugged Peggy contentedly. “Count us in.”
Elise looked at Carey. “How about you, Carey?”
Carey gave her a thumb’s up. “You bet.”
As everyone headed to the dining room, Elise saw Michael putting out some cabbage rolls that had been warming in the oven. She squeezed Annabel’s hand. “Come on, let’s join our friends and have a great time.”
Annabel hesitated. “Are you sure? I was afraid I’d ruined everything.”
“Just the opposite. I’m very proud of what you did.”
“Why?” Annabel asked.
“Because you stood up for someone who’s too nice to say anything when they’re treated badly. You didn’t let Claire get away with being a bully.”
“Thank you.”
“Plus, I bet it felt good to express yourself.”
Annabel smiled shyly. “Yes, it felt very good.”
Elise started to follow Annabel into the dining room and stopped short. Sometimes, she had intuitive flashes about other people. This one made her sad. Arel was in trouble. She was sure of it. “Annabel, is it crazy for me to be worried about Arel? I know he’s an adult, and that he should be able to stand up to Claire, but—”
Annabel frowned. “I know how you feel. I wish I could help too, but he has very definite ideas about how he should conduct his life. So I guess we’ll have to trust that he’ll make better decisions in the future.”
“The future?” Elise sighed. “If he marries Claire, I don’t think he’ll have a future.”
* * * * *
As soon as Arel returned home from Elise’s party, he excused himself and headed for the stairs to the lower level. Claire indicated that she was upset and wanted to talk, but he ignored her. It was the first time that he’d put her off. He had no choice. He was so nauseous that he was afraid he wouldn’t make it to the bathroom.
As he was vomiting out copious amounts of bile, he hadn’t counted on Claire banging on the door. Her voice was sharp and insistent, demanding that he let her in. Instead of answering her, his mind was focused on a question that repeated over and over. How had his life spun out of control?
His first thought was to talk to Michael. He needed the angel’s advice to help him make sense of what was happening. But both of his angelic friends were next door, at Elise’s house. In fact, all of his friends, with the exception of William and Rolphe, were at his neighbor’s house. That’s when the truth hit home. He was alone. All alone. Or was he?
Claire was on the other side of the door. The thought should have been comforting. Instead, he threw up again. When his stomach settled a little, he crawled over to a corner of the bathroom and propped himself up against the wall. “But I won’t even have this wall for very long,” he mumbled to himself.
Claire explained that they didn’t need a house. They only needed a small apartment that would serve as a base of operations. That way they would be free to travel and volunteer wherever they were needed. Claire also explained that she wouldn’t always be with him. She had other duties that involved working with her archaeology studies. When she could take time off, she’d join Arel, wherever he was.
Arel stifled a groan, afraid that Claire would hear him. He couldn’t bear the chastisement that would follow. His life and freedom were slipping away, but he didn’t know a way out. His relationship with Claire wasn’t working, and he couldn’t tell her how he felt.
A feeling of impending disaster closed in as he fell asleep. But letting himself doze off was a mistake too. He started dreaming immediately. Transported back in time, he found himself in the midst of a tragic affair from his past. He dreamed about the woman he’d loved, the woman who killed herself when she mistakenly thought he’d rejected her. The aftermath of guilt was unbearable.
When he woke himself up, he knew there was only one way out of his present situation. He’d have to go through with marrying Claire. No matter how that fact affected his life, it was better than the pain of guilt and regret.
With some effort, he managed to get to his feet. His stomach was only slightly better, and he still had a splitting headache, but that was becoming the norm. He wouldn’t let his body’s condition deter him from what he had to do. But before he sought out Claire, he had to make himself presentable. It didn’t sound like a difficult task until he saw himself in the mirror.
“Bloody hell, I haven’t looked this bad in a while.” His face was drawn and haggard, and he had dark circles under pathetic eyes. They belonged to one of those needy children Claire talked about. But if Claire loved him, she’d understand, wouldn’t she?
He thought he heard her in their bedroom. But before he opened the door, he straightened up and tried to smile. Maybe he’d look more attractive if he demonstrated that most important “better attitude” she was always talking about. He said a quick prayer for help, swung open the door and stepped out into the bedroom.
He wasn’t prepared to see an open suitcase on the bed. Before he had a chance to think, Claire came out of the closet with an armful of clothes.
“Claire? What’s going on?” he asked as he closed the distance between them.
Claire walked around him, but for once she didn’t have anything to say. Throwing her clothes into her suitcase, she traipsed back around him, going into the closet again.
“Claire, please, tell me why you’re packing?”
She poked her head out and stared back with disgust. “Must I explain everything to you? Are you so incapable of understanding even the simplest of things?”
He sat down on the bed, thinking about how to answer and listening. From what he could tell, Claire was pulling clothes off of hangers. When she walked back into the room with another armful, he looked up at her. “I guess I am dense because I don’t know what’s happening.”
Claire glared back. “I’m packing my clothes and leaving. Is that clear enough?”
“Where are you going?”
“Back to California. I’ll stay with my parents for a while.”
“Are they okay? Did I miss something while I was in the bathroom?”
Claire continued to stuff her clothes into her suitcase. “I’m just tired, Arel. You seem unable to stand up for anything. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone as wishy-washy as you.”
“What are you talking about? I’ve tried to support whatever you wanted.”
“Exactly. You don’t have a mind of your own. In fact, I think you’re missing a very important part of your anatomy, a backbone.”
“Is this about the party and what Annabel said to you?”
Claire went to the dresser and grabbed more of her belongings out of a drawer. “No, I’m not afraid of what other people say to me. They’re just ignorant. They fight reason and moral obligation with outbursts of anger. But I can’t marry someone who hides away in a bathroom as soon as a few harsh words are dished out.”
He blinked back, trying to process the accusations that Claire was making about him. “Do you want to know what I think? You haven’t given me a chance—”
Claire’s laughter cut him off. “Please, I just
explained that I’ve given you every chance to stand up for something. But you’re like the kid who gets sent home from kindergarten because they’re crybabies. Maybe you’ll grow up some day, but I can’t wait for that to happen.”
He stood up to face her. “How can you judge me like this?”
Claire paused and stared back at him. “Arel, do you know why you always give in so easily?”
“Because I want you to be happy.”
“No, that’s not the reason.”
“I know how I feel, Claire. And I’m trying to be there for you.”
“Stop it, Arel, just stop it now! You’re lying to me, and you’re lying to yourself. But it’s time to face the truth.”
“What truth?”
“You live in a fantasy world. Look at this house. It’s full of stuff that isolates you and makes you feel safe. When you saw me, I think you wanted to add me to your collection of beautiful objects. But when reality hits, you fold like you did tonight.”
“That is so ridiculous.”
Claire zipped up her suitcase, set it on the floor, and retrieved her backpack. “Maybe when I met you, I let myself dream a little too. I think I took a vacation from the real world. But that’s not where I want to spend my life.”
“I wasn’t going to force you to want what I want. I’m willing to change. Doesn’t that count in your book?”
“I’ve been through this before. People say they can change, but—”
“So you’d had other serious relationships?”
“Oh please, of course I have. Haven’t you?”
“There was one, but it was a long time ago.”
“And did you change for her?”
Arel thought about Justina. He’d loved her completely, but he thought he was cursed. How was he supposed to change that?
Claire snapped her fingers. “I asked you a question. Did you change for her?”
“No.”
Claire threw the backpack over her shoulder. “I’m sorry, but this marriage idea was wrong from the start. I just let myself think you’d be different. Big mistake.”
“So it’s over? No more discussions? You just walk out the door?”