That evening Lynne maintained the façade of a mother of one, even though Agatha and Laurie often caught themselves chuckling together. Laurie was amazed at how easily Eric kept the secret, but he didn’t dwell on that painter’s ability to shield the truth. Laurie simply enjoyed knowing what Stanford didn’t until the men snuggled under their covers. Then Laurie started to imply that he knew something, withholding the facts until Stanford practically begged for the information. As soon as Laurie stopped speaking, Stanford gasped, then sighed. For a moment Laurie wondered if he had strung out his lover too far. Then Stan began to smile, then chortle. He stopped himself before a belly laugh could emerge, in part Laurie realized, that Stanford was trying to ascertain how far along was Lynne. Then Stanford cleared his throat, asking Laurie that very question, albeit it in a circuitous manner. Laurie was blunt, trying to keep his voice even. Yet he wanted to scream in laughter, for as soon as the words hit Stanford, he leaned away from Laurie, flopping into the center of the bed. Laurie restrained himself from full-on hilarity, but did manage to soothe Stanford’s mind, that if nothing else it was probably the last baby to be conceived within their home.
Both Laurie and Stanford had to work on Wednesday and as all had guessed, Stanford made an early exit. Lynne slept late, waking even after Laurie had left, but the Snyders were spending that day with Stanford’s father, who didn’t inquire about the dark circles under Lynne’s eyes. Michael was too enchanted with Jane, who flirted shamelessly as the foursome walked through Central Park on a rather warm spring day. They had lunch at Michael’s home, where he apologized for not having hosted them overnight during their stay. Eric noted how glad they were that Jane was mostly good humored what with all this bustling about. Then Michael smiled, recalling that the trio still had one more trek to make tomorrow to Brooklyn. Michael’s eyes twinkled, which made Eric and Lynne chuckle. But the Snyders were unaware of Michael’s exact meaning. Even he knew of the friction between Wilma, Rose, and a certain chocolate cake.
The Snyders left Michael with the relief that they hadn’t needed to explain Lynne’s fatigue. They arrived back at Stanford and Laurie’s, where promptly Lynne went to nap. Jane was harder to convince, but finally she too fell asleep. That left Eric with some free time, during which he sketched Agatha in the kitchen, at her insistence. Then she smiled slyly; she hoped that sometime before Eric left he could get Stanford and Laurie to pose.
Eric admitted he wished for the same and Agatha laughed. “Leave this out for them. Stanford will ask about it and you can explain. Or if he asks while I’m here, I’ll just tell him you got bored and pestered me.”
“He might ask, better to talk art than about Lynne.” Eric smiled, then gazed at the drawing. Agatha looked little like her Queens’ counterpart, her bearing so formal. Also motherly, but from a distance. Yet he’d sensed no difference in how she treated them, why had he depicted her reserve within the sketch? Maybe only to cause Stanford to pay attention, or maybe…. Maybe it was Agatha to purposely make the differentiation. Eric studied her, that uniform not all that dissimilar to what she’d worn last week at home. Skirts and buttoned-up blouses, although her shoes had been brown, not black, her hose the same. She had often donned an apron, but it wasn’t white, usually brightly colored. Here she seemed regal, where in Queens, while in charge, she wasn’t so stiff. Then Eric shook his head. Stiff wasn’t the word. Here in this apartment she was….
The boss, and Eric wanted to chuckle. In Queens, while Donald was a quiet man, he was clearly the head of the family, no matter how loudly Agatha might bark. Within this household, although she was an employee, she was also the chief cook and bottle washer, what Sam would say, but there was nothing demeaning about that role. Without Agatha, Stan and Laurie’s world would no longer hold together.
Did the men realize that, Eric wondered. He gazed at Agatha, who wore a knowing smile. She certainly did and now he laughed out loud. Yet, Agatha wouldn’t press Stanford to pose for his client. She simply had permitted Eric to sketch her in a manner that outwardly presumed her place within this residence as that of a domestic. Now Eric felt subdued; it would take this subtle yet powerful woman to get Stanford to let down his guard, for other than Laurie and Michael, only Agatha Morris had fully permeated Stanford Taylor’s thick wall.
When it came to the art dealer, Eric didn’t discount where he, Lynne, Jane and of course the coming baby stood. They had all crawled under Stanford’s skin, much to his chagrin. But Stanford still was wary around them, why he’d left for work so early that morning. Eric wasn’t bothered, only intrigued. He couldn’t wait to see how Stanford approached any of them when he came home, not to mention how he behaved tomorrow in Brooklyn.
Yet, Eric could almost predict how that trip would proceed. The taxi ride would be a chatty affair, although Stanford would offer little discourse. Once at Wilma’s, Stanford would deftly lead Eric into a quiet corner where they would talk about work. On the way home, Stanford would continue that discussion while Lynne and Laurie recounted all sorts of Gordon gossip. Seth wouldn’t predominate that conversation, Eric smiled. It would center on a bevy of women not all that dissimilar from the ladies in Queens.
“Are you looking forward to tomorrow?” Agatha asked.
Eric laughed. “Was just thinking about that trip, and yup, I am. Will probably talk a lot of shop with my dealer.”
Agatha turned to face Eric, a smile on her face. “Indeed you will.” She returned to stirring the pot of soup on the stove. “I wonder what Mrs. Gordon will make, for dessert, you know.”
“Well, if it’s anything like that coconut cake Laurie’s mother baked, good grief. I’ve put on ten pounds during this vacation.”
Agatha had a gentle laugh. “Sometimes Laurie brings home slices of a rather delicious chocolate cake. Maybe she’ll fix that for you folks.”
“Well if she does, I’ll let you know. Should we try to finagle one for you?”
“Oh, don’t worry about me. There’s still half a sweet potato pie from yesterday.”
Eric nodded. “Yeah, I can’t wait to see what Marek thinks of that creation. He adores Lynne’s pumpkin, but I think sweet potato might become his new favorite.”
Agatha turned around, a warm grin on her face. “You do let me know what he thinks of it. I am curious.”
“I’ll do that and while I’m not a betting man, I wouldn’t be surprised if you received a thank-you note from him.”
Agatha chuckled. “You just tell me what sort of sweet Mrs. Gordon fixes for you all and I’ll let you know if I hear from your pastor.”
“Agreed,” Eric smiled, sipping his coffee.
That night Stanford gave Eric and Lynne his congratulations, but it wasn’t until nearly the close of the evening when he allowed himself to fully express his excitement, which was still hedged in what Eric felt was disbelief. The Snyders discussed it briefly before Lynne fell asleep. Maybe Stanford never imagined any sort of procreation could take place within his home.
On Thursday morning, there was nowhere for Stanford to escape; he, Laurie, and the Snyders would eat lunch in Brooklyn and wouldn’t be back until late, what Stanford assumed. Agatha wasn’t staying in Manhattan all day; she would leave as soon as the rest had departed. If anyone was hungry later, leftovers remained in the refrigerator. Stanford would let Laurie and Eric manage the reheating.
As for Lynne…. Stanford wanted to give her the appropriate compliments, yet he felt somewhat strangled. He wished to speak to Dr. Walsh about it, but truthfully, what would he say to his shrink? Yes, Stanford felt quite awkward that Eric and Lynne had probably gotten pregnant there in Manhattan, that was certainly more information than Stanford had needed. But what business was it of his, in that they were adults and this sort of thing happened between men and women and…. And there was where Stanford wished to wriggle from his skin, which then angered him. What difference did it make, and how many nude paintings of Lynne had Stanford admired, and of course the Snyders had wanted to add to
their family and…. And he so badly wished to walk to Lynne, grasp her hand, look her in the eyes and tell her how pleased he was for her. And Stanford was pleased; Lynne was a wonderful mother, she made Eric very happy. So then why was he being so damn reticent about sharing in their joy?
He had considered it at work yesterday, finding himself alternately wanting to tell Miss Harold, then recoiling at sharing such intimate news with his secretary. Emily knew the Snyders were still in New York, yet as far as she understood, Stanford was merely allowing them to stay at his home as if they were too poor to get a hotel. But of course Emily knew that wasn’t at all the case, yet she never inquired why the Snyders had chosen such a lengthy sojourn east, nor the reason the couple was still at Stanford’s. But it wasn’t only a couple; there was Jane, and now another baby, and Stanford looked over at Laurie, sitting across from him at the kitchen table, it was only them and Agatha at the moment. Jane’s empty high chair waited in the far corner, the Snyders were still sleeping. Or maybe Eric was getting up with Jane, allowing his wife to rest. Stanford glanced at the clock; it was nearly a quarter after seven. Wasn’t Jane hungry, he wondered.
Yet Agatha said nothing and Laurie was quiet. The Snyders’ news had brought peace to Laurie’s mind, for which Stanford was grateful. And of course Agatha was thrilled. Michael wasn’t yet aware, but when he learned, and then Stanford shuddered. Now he knew why he was so flustered, and he felt even more unease, although it wasn’t connected to Lynne. Stanford stared at Laurie until he made eye contact. All Stanford had to do was stand from his chair. Laurie did the same, neither saying a word to Agatha.
At first Stanford nearly blurted his reservations just beyond the closed kitchen door. Then he paused, motioning for Laurie to follow him to their bedroom. But that was too close to where the Snyders still rested. With a huff, Stanford led his partner into the library, shutting the door behind them.
Stanford never came into this room alone. The figurines were the reason, but he ignored them, instead considering how last night the foursome hadn’t shared their usual nightcaps. Lynne had been exhausted and it had been easy for Laurie to insist that Eric escort his wife to bed. Eric returned with Jane, but Stanford had excused himself, leaving Laurie to entertain. When Laurie came to bed, Stanford pretended to be asleep, although Laurie hadn’t permitted that ruse to last. With few words they had made love, then Stanford laid awake for a good hour while listening to Laurie’s drones. Now he faced that man, who wore a thoughtful gaze.
“Do you wanna talk about this?” Laurie said quietly.
Did Laurie realize the reason, Stanford wondered. The incident, as Stanford now termed it, had happened early in their relationship, maybe Laurie had forgotten. Stanford cleared his throat, then nodded. “You shouldn’t have told me yet.”
Not this soon, Stanford immediately wished to add, but as soon as he’d spoken, Laurie nodded, then looked at the floor. Then Laurie met Stanford’s gaze. “I’m sorry, oh Stan, I didn’t even think about….”
Stanford nodded, for he never considered the miscarriage that his sister Louise had suffered many years ago. She and Herb had only been married for a few months and they hadn’t been able to keep the news to themselves. Michael and Constance had been thrilled for their first grandchild, also the first for Herb’s parents. Louise had been in fairly good health, but those details had been set far back into Stanford’s memories; Louise lost her baby with no explanations forthcoming.
Yet, what equally bothered Stanford was how little he had cared at the time. He recalled sitting with his father, although Laurie hadn’t accompanied. This news had only been for Stanford, who had taken it without much more than a slight nod, then a sigh. Then he’d offered some pithy sentiments, leaving his father for home, where he’d told Laurie in a similar fashion. Stanford couldn’t even remember, the information having made such a small impression. The next time he saw Louise he had embraced her, and probably awkwardly he now mused, also giving to her the same half-hearted apologies. Well over a year later, she gave birth to a son, then subsequently had two daughters. Stanford had attended few of their various activities, but his nephew Robert was in high school and Stanford would probably go to his graduation.
Whether or not Laurie joined him was irrelevant. Stanford barely knew his nephew, or his nieces, any of them. He never sent them birthday cards, nor did he receive any, other than those from his sisters. Not that Laurie was especially close to his nieces and nephews, but often Laurie trekked to Brooklyn for this or that activity. Not for any of the Gordon women of course, just his three sisters, to whom he was quite close. All three would be at the Gordon home today, making for a clucking group of hens. Then Stanford shivered. Were Eric and Lynne planning to share their news?
“It’s all right,” Stanford said, stepping toward Laurie. Laurie grasped Stanford’s hands, then Stanford sighed. “They’re not going to say anything today, are they?”
“No, I can’t imagine they would. My God Stan, I feel so dumb. I didn’t even think about Louise and Herb.”
Stanford sighed again. “Neither did I until just this morning.”
As Stanford spoke, that odd heaviness was lifted from his shoulders. Now he trembled and Laurie’s grip increased. Then Laurie led Stanford to the sofa and Stanford was grateful, for his legs wobbled beneath him. Suddenly a warm joy bubbled in Stanford’s chest, yet slight guilt still lurked within him. He did care more about Lynne than any of his sisters, but maybe that wasn’t overly surprising. Who Stanford had been years ago wasn’t anything like the person he was now.
Most of that was due to the man beside him; how much had loving Laurie changed Stanford? Yet, not all those alterations were Laurie’s doing, and again Stanford felt awkward. But he didn’t need to explain that to Laurie; he’d already pointed it out, and rather plainly, months before. Eric, Lynne, and Jane mattered to Stanford, and now one other would be thrown into that mix, or hopefully that baby would arrive safely. Stanford closed his eyes, offering a random prayer similar to the one he’d said during the Missile Crisis. When he opened his eyes, Laurie’s were misty. “What?” Stanford said abruptly. “Is there something wrong?”
Laurie nodded, making Stanford sick to his stomach. But quickly that nausea passed, although Stanford’s heart did feel twisted. Laurie noted that while Eric and Lynne had no plans to tell anyone in Brooklyn, they had yet to inform the Aherns. As Laurie explained why, Stanford stood, no longer feeling weakened. He walked to the where the figurines stood, then stared at the woman. For the first time, Stanford didn’t see Lynne as that statue. It was Renee Ahern pleading with God.
That night, Stanford held Jane while the other adults fixed the evening meal. Jane was fussy, but Stanford wasn’t bothered. He found Eric often glancing his way as if checking on the dealer, but Stanford would shake his head, then place the whiny baby over his other shoulder. Jane quieted, maybe due to Stanford’s newfound role. Then just as he felt competent, she started to fret. He clucked to himself, then walked from the kitchen, but didn’t relinquish the infant in his care.
Jane still grumbled, but Stanford bobbed her up and down, thinking about all that had occurred at Wilma’s. Now Eric and Lynne understood the great cake war, as Eric had termed it in the taxi coming home. Both Stanford and Laurie were surprised at how Eric had been forewarned by Agatha, although her caution had been mild, or at least Eric hadn’t been prepared for all that one recipe meant within Laurie’s family. Now Stanford smiled; Agatha could be sneaky and he wondered what Eric might tell her tomorrow. Stanford had a full agenda at the office, but what he would give to hear that conversation.
Maybe Agatha would get to work early, or Jane would rouse her father from bed before Stanford left. He chuckled, which made Jane stop crying. He stared at her, those blue eyes looking drowsy, but still the same hue as Sam Ahern’s. Stanford felt a chill considering that man, but Jane’s small grin eased Stanford’s heart. “There’s so much in this world you have no idea about,” Stanford said. “I wonder
if that’s better than what we all know.”
Jane blinked, but didn’t fuss. Then she yawned, laying her head on Stanford’s shoulder. He walked slowly, then saw Eric head his way. Now Stanford smiled, even with Eric’s sly grin. The art dealer had talked plenty of shop with his client, but Stanford had also given Lynne a strong hug upon their return from Brooklyn. He would never tell either Snyder about Louise’s loss, but maybe one day Stanford might find a way to apologize to his sister. Or maybe, Stanford mused, the past didn’t matter anymore.
“Is it time to eat?” Stanford asked. “Or are you here to relieve me?”
“It’s just about dinnertime,” Eric said. “And I can take the girl if you want.”
“It’s all right, she seems placated.” Stanford felt a deep truth uttered in that statement. Then he sighed. “Eric, I am very happy for you and Lynne.”
Eric chuckled, then took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. “It was hard not saying anything to Rose and Wilma today. But Laurie can tell them in another couple of months. In the meantime, they can battle it out over that cake recipe.” Then Eric laughed. “I can’t wait to talk to Agatha in the morning.”
Stanford grinned. “Yes, there is that bone of contention. The recipe will probably go with Wilma to her grave.”
Eric nodded. “Somehow I don’t see her passing it to her daughters. Maybe she could be persuaded to give it to Agatha though, for your and Laurie’s benefit.”
Now Stanford laughed, but softly, as not to wake the baby. Then he cleared his throat. “Eric, Laurie told me about the Aherns.” Stanford paused; there was much attached to that subject, but little else for Stanford to say.
“I thought he might. Not much Lynne and I can do about it, and to be honest, I’m not looking forward to how they’ll take the news.”
Stanford nodded. “I suppose you’ll tell them when you get home.”
“Yeah, after Lynne sees her doctor. Stan, I do apologize, I mean….” Eric’s tone grew somber. “It’s still very early, I mean, well….”
As Stanford reached for Eric’s hand, Jane stirred. But Eric completed the action, gripping Stanford’s outstretched hand. Then Eric released Stanford, but he didn’t step away. “It’ll be whatever it’s supposed to be,” Eric said. He caught Stanford’s gaze, then motioned toward the kitchen. “I think Laurie wants to eat in there. He was setting the table when I left.”
Stanford nodded, wondering if Eric could read minds. Somehow Stanford felt that Eric knew about Louise’s loss, maybe Eric even understood how long it had taken Stanford to put two and two together. Or maybe Stanford permitted him too much knowledge. Yet, in how Eric nodded at him, perhaps that man was psychic as well as a brilliant painter.
But even with such gifts, Eric’s hands were still tied. Following Eric to the kitchen, Stanford wondered how Sam and Renee would react to the Snyders’ news. As Eric took Jane from Stanford’s shoulder, Stanford smiled at Lynne, already seated at the table. Laurie was serving, and Stanford sat beside a tired but happy woman. As Lynne took a deep breath, Stanford squeezed her hand. She laughed as she exhaled, stirring within Stanford a welcome peace. These people were now part of him and one more was on the way.
Chapter 105
The Hawk: Part Six Page 7