by Hanna Hart
"Will you just stop it?” he snapped. “I invited an old friend to dinner: that's all! I'm not proposing to her. I'm not starting anything with her. I just thought it would be nice to have someone here who isn't judging me all of the time.”
"Oh, nobody is judging you, Walker,” Kendall rolled her eyes with such force he thought they might continue to spin in circles.
She gave the same bratty look she’d always given him when he was a kid, and she was telling on him for one thing or another.
Before he had a chance to respond, he heard the front doorbell chime throughout the house.
"If you'll excuse me, I have a guest to greet,” he said tersely before leaving the kitchen.
Love was the last thing on Walker’s mind. Leanne had burned a hole in his heart that felt like an ever-expanding void. He didn’t want a girlfriend—and Kendall was right, even if he did want a girlfriend, Ava would be the last person he should consider.
Yet, as he opened the front door, the excitement he felt rise through his stomach and up into his heart was undeniable.
Ava stood before him, bundled in an army green jacket with rosy cheeks, fresh from the cold.
“Hey,” she said with a toothy grin.
"Hi, come on in,” he said, waving her inside.
He took her coat and hung it in the closet. Underneath, she wore black leggings and an emerald dress. She looked like she was trying, which made him nervous in the best way possible.
"This is like being in the Twilight Zone; you know that, right?” Ava said as she looked around the wallpapered foyer.
“Hasn't changed a bit,” he said. “Which is good. That means I don't need to give you a tour or be a remotely good host.”
Ava gave a loud laugh. "Excellent.”
“So, you need the bathroom?” he suggested, then hiked a finger up toward the stairs and said, “You know where it is.”
She gestured toward the kitchen and added, "If I need a drink, just help myself?”
"You got it,” he said with a snap of his fingers.
The two of them talked in the entryway for just a few minutes more before Walker’s mother called him into the dining room.
When he first brought up the idea of having Ava come over for dinner, he thought his mother would have something to say about it. But, to his surprise, she just seemed excited. Maybe it was the winter atmosphere or all of the recent talk of love and bonding, but she happily arranged an extra spot at the table and made sure to make some of Ava’s favorites—garlic parmesan asparagus, cheddar mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie.
He sat with his family, along with Rhys’ girlfriend Becca, Kendall’s fiancé Shane, and Ava, and felt strangely comfortable.
Talking to Ava from days before felt like he was in a dream or an alternate reality. He thought to others it would probably seem strange to admit to his ex-girlfriend that he had failed at yet another important relationship in his life. But at the same time, he felt completely at ease talking to her. In some ways, it was as though no time had passed at all between them.
The breakup with Ava was one of the hardest things he’d ever been through, up until his divorce.
He watched the ease with which she interacted with his family. Ava always thought she was hard and prickly on the exterior. She thought Walker was the charming half of the relationship and that she was the sardonic realist between them, but he always found her captivating.
Walker smiled as she regaled his family with tales of her work on the mountains and where her filming had taken her and found himself laughing along with her jokes.
She had center stage at his family dinner, and he couldn’t have been happier to be an audience member.
"We have missed you, Ava,” his mother said, coming down from a laugh. “You are so beautiful now.”
Walker’s brows creased. There was that familiar family embarrassment. "Not that she wasn't before,” he added quickly, correcting his mother.
"Oh, no, no!” Dahlia said. “She was a gorgeous girl. Some people just take some time to grow into their features. Like Rhys,” she pointed.
His father, Richard, nodded in agreement. "He was an egg-head up until he was about ten,” he said, absent-mindedly as he stabbed a fork through a spear of asparagus.
"Thanks, Dad,” Rhys said, giving a cadet’s salute across the table.
"It's hard to meet a good girl,” his mother said pointedly. “I wouldn't give anything to be in my twenties again. Not with this generation. It was hard enough to find a wife the time first time around, you know?”
"Definitely,” his father added. “And the dating now, it's all swipe this, bumblebee that. Nobody meets for real anymore.”
"So, who are you working for these days, Ava? Still up in the mountains?” Rhys asked and Walker was grateful for the change in subject.
"Yeah, I'm actually in a three-year contract with Pine Lodge,” she answered. “You know that resort?”
"Oh, how fun!” Becca chimed in.
"Yeah, they've been really cool,” Ava nodded. “Sometimes they invite my mom and me up for some skiing for the day. We've got all these passes.”
"We used to have such fun skiing with your mom, didn't we?” his mother said, nudging his father for acknowledgment. “She was so graceful on the snow.”
"Not like me,” Ava snorted, meeting Walker’s eyes. “I remember you were all such amazing skiers; I was so embarrassed when you guys invited me to go with you that told you. So, naturally, wanting to impress him, I told Walker I could ski, so he took me up on the ski lift. Do you remember that?”
Walker grinned. "How could I forget? The minute you got on the lift, I thought, uh-oh, she has never been skiing before a day in her life. When we got to the top, I said, ‘You've never done this, have you?’ And she said, ‘Yes, of course I have!’And I said, ‘You told me you ski, so I brought you up here, but this hill has moguls on it!’”
Ava fixed a strand of her dark hair behind her ear. She looked around the table, in true story-telling fashion, and said, "And all I was thinking was, what's a mogul?”
The table laughed, and Walker continued, "And she was so stubborn, so hilarious, that she just went down that hill anyhow!”
“You just winged it?” Becca said in shock. “Just like that?”
Ava shrugged. “I was desperate to prove a point.”
The point being that she belonged, Walker thought.
His family’s wealth had always been intimidating to Ava. Their house, their status in the community, their generous offers to pay for her higher educated—which she denied—mixed with her lower-class neighborhood, broken family, and alcoholic mother had always made Ava feel like she was on the outside of their family.
This couldn’t have been further from the truth, of course. His family had always liked Ava and welcomed them into their lives without hesitation, even after they met her mother for the first time, which, suffice to say, was not a shining moment.
“I just remember looking over and seeing her bouncing off these moguls,” Walker said, continuing the story. “She did three in a row. I have never seen someone go so fast.”
"Or scream so loud,” Ava added with humor.
"For a second, I thought, wow, she's doing it! And then I'm watching her fly right into one of the attendants,” Walker laughed. "There were just these ski poles and snow flying everywhere.”
The story had the desired effect, bringing levity to the table and causing chuckles all around.
Ava shot a finger into the air and announced, “Just for the record, I am much, much better now.”
"We should all go sometime,” Dahlia said. “Wouldn't that be fun?”
"Yeah, I think it would,” Ava said.
"Actually,” his father chimed in, setting a fork down on his plate, “do you know what? We’re all going to the carnival tomorrow, around three. Why don’t you come with us, dear?”
"Oh. I have a project due Friday,” Ava said with the familiar discomfort that came from rejec
ting someone who was trying to be nice. She brushed a tiny hand along her arm and said, “I don’t know. But thank you for the offer.”
"It’s nearly December,” his mother said as though it was someone a dismissal of Ava’s project. “Nobody works in December.”
"People work, Mom,” Walker said.
"All work and no play makes Ava an unhappy girl!” Dahlia continued. “Come on, dear. Invite your mother! We would love to see her."
"Maybe,” Ava smiled politely. “I don’t know.”
Ava looked at Walker, and when their eyes connected, he felt a spark.
The dinner continued the way he imagined it would, with simple conversations about family and travel and the endless winter plans his parents had made, but he couldn’t stop thinking about that spark.
At the end of the evening, Walker followed Ava out to her car, making footprints in the snow as they walked.
“So, what did you make of it?” he asked as she reached the driver’s side door. “Your resubmission into the crazy world of the Edwards’ family?”
“Oh, it was one wild ride,” she said, and her breath came out in a plume of smoke.
“Not one reference to Mexico,” he teased.
“Yeah, yeah,” Ava laughed. “You know what? It was nice to see everyone again. Your family was always so sweet to me. And I really like Becca!”
“She’s nice,” he agreed, then jeered, “And what did you think about Shane?”
Ava made a snoring noise, tilting her head to the side and jerking suddenly as if she had just started to fall asleep. “I’m sorry, what? I couldn’t hear you over the bore-coma I was put in by Shane.”
“Right?” he chuckled in agreement. “He’s like…”
“He’s like, nothing! No personality. He’s just like this little robot person.”
He nodded. “I know, I know!”
Ava looked down at her feet, and though she couldn’t see it, Walker rolled his shoulders nervously and said, “Just for the record, it would be awesome if you could come to the carnival.”
“No pressure or anything,” she said.
“Nah, no pressure,” he gave a dismissive wave. “Only I may die of boredom without you there.”
“Well, we wouldn’t want that,” she said, and he couldn’t help but notice a hint of flirtation in her voice. He raised his brows and grabbed either side of her jacket opening.
“And I would really like to see you again,” he said, his fingers snapping up the buttons of her jacket, one at a time.
Ava bit her lip, her eyes never leaving his. “I think…I would like that, too.”
He felt his heart lilt. What were they doing? “Then, it’s a—” he began.
“Don’t say date!” Ava laughed.
“Plan,” he offered with a wry smile.
“Alright then, mister,” she said in her beautiful way. “It’s a plan.”
Walker didn’t know exactly what he was doing—playing with fire, clearly—but he couldn’t resist the opportunity to spend more time with Ava.
Chapter Eight
Ava
The best part about Colorado, in Ava’s opinion, was the endless list of things to do once snow hit the ground.
It was officially winter, and the snow was here to stay, no longer melting mere hours after it had fallen, and Ava couldn’t have been happier.
She spent the morning up at a resort, filming some promos for Pine Lodge, and by the evening, she was back at home in her tiny home her mother.
Ava was alright for money. She didn’t have to scrimp and save to get by like she did when she was in her early twenties.
Her job afforded her fulfilling work and a steady paycheck, but that didn’t mean she was rolling in money.
She’d tried to spruce her house up now and then, including ripping out the wall of the spare bedroom to make her nine-by-zilch room a little more spacious, but beyond a couple of yard sale pieces and a newly wallpapered bathroom—since wallpaper had somehow managed to make a comeback in the home décor world—her little two-bedroom house was pretty much the same as it was since she was a teenager.
Ava stared at her laptop screen as she clipped segments from her shoot earlier and put them in a folder to send to her editor later.
Her eyes burned when she looked at the clock and realized that she’d been at her computer for more than four hours.
The sun had already set, even though it was still early evening, and she couldn’t help imagining how Walker’s day at the carnival had panned out.
She bit her lip and stared down at her cell phone. She had work to do, but she couldn’t help but text Walker.
“How was the carnival?” she asked.
“I didn’t go,” he responded, followed by the tongue-emoji.
“That’s too bad,” she wrote, “Because I was thinkin’ of going. Care to keep me company?”
His response was instant. “I can be there in fifteen.”
“Meet you by the Ferris wheel,” she wrote before tossing her cell phone into her purse.
Ava freshened her mascara in the mirror and fluffed her impossibly thick hair. She turned on her curling wand and put a few sparse curls into the dark mop, hoping that they would make her hair look more bedhead chic than lazy girl.
"You heading out for the night?” her mother asked, looking briefly away from the television to watch her daughter walk to their entryway closet.
"Yeah,” Ava nodded, pulling out her green jacket and throwing on a thick red and black scarf.
"Where to?” Gloria asked. “How long are you gonna be gone?”
Ava fussed with her scarf and nervously stumbled, "Um. Didn't I tell you? I ran into um, Walker?”
Her mother sat up straighter, muting the television. She met Ava’s eyes with a peculiar stare. “No,” Gloria enunciated, “You didn't mention that.”
"No?” Ava said, pretending to be surprised. “Hm. Funny.”
"And you're going to...?" her mother trailed off, waiting for Ava to finish the sentence.
"Well, his family invited me to the carnival today and, actually, they invited you, too! So, if you are up for coming out, then, hey! Welcome aboard,” she said jovially.
"No,” Gloria said, drawing out her vowel. “I think I would like to spend the evening with my daughter. I want to tell you about something.”
"Well, I sort of already made plans,” Ava said, setting her hand on the front door handle. “I’m sorry. Can we talk tomorrow?”
"You're not serious?” Gloria laughed. “You want to go out with the Edwards?”
"You used to like them!” Ava said, trying to keep her tone light and humorous.
Of course, she knew why her mother wasn’t crazy about the family.
Ava was a wreck during that time. She’d miscarried a baby, and she had no one to talk to about it. She’d lost her boyfriend—pushed him away—and her heart was broken. She was angry.
In a way, Ava had always been an angry person, and she supposed she had her mother to blame for that.
Gloria had been an addict for as long as Ava could remember, and without a father or any siblings or extended family to help, taking care of Gloria became Ava’s full-time job.
There was no one as selfish in the world as a drunk. She’d watched her mother lie, steal, cheat, and ruin her whole life.
But then Gloria would get sober, and she was like a new person. She became a mother, baking bread and tarts and cookies. She had an endless heart and seemed eternally devoted to Ava’s happiness.
The breakup was a blessing in disguise for Ava and her mother’s relationship.
After Walker left, something snapped in Gloria that told her she needed to get her life together. She saw how hurt her daughter was and how much Ava needed a mother.
Gloria stayed sober for two whole years before relapsing after that.
Even then, the relapse hadn’t turned into months-long binging sessions, as Ava had feared, but a single night of drinking followed by six more months of so
briety.
Every time Gloria fell, she would try that much harder to keep it together the next time.
This was the right decision, Ava would tell herself about her breakup. This is right. I’m working on myself. I’m focusing on family.
Ava wasn’t wrong, but it didn’t take long before she began to miss Walker.
"I used to like them,” her mother corrected, pulling her back into the present. “Used to, being the operative phrase. What in the world are you thinking?”
Ava’s eyes darted skyward and she tapped her chin. "I'm thinking...mmm, hot chocolate and winter parade: sounds good!”
"I'm serious, Ava,” Gloria snapped.
She shrugged. "So am I.”
"I'm worried about you,” her mother said.
"Well, welcome to the club.”
Ava had muttered those words under her breath, her bitterness from days gone by creeping into the present day.
"Excuse me?” her mother said, louder then. “What did you just say?”
"I spent my whole life being worried about you,” Ava nipped. “It's about time we finally swapped roles.”
Gloria stood up and walked over to the doorway with both hands on her hips. Her eyes were angry but also hurt. "We've been doing good, you and me. Haven't we?” she asked, and the question was not rhetorical. “Why do you have to take this attitude with me?”
"I'm not trying to take an attitude with you, Mother,” she said, buttoning up her coat. “I'm trying not to be late.”
“Ava, I’m just—” her mother began, but Ava slapped a smile on her face and called, “Bye, Mom!” before walking out the front door.
Ava loved her mother. She wanted the best relationship possible for them, and they were working on it every day. But it was hard for resentment not to fill her belly every once and a while, especially when Gloria tried to mother her.
She expressed these thoughts to Walker when she met him at the Ferris wheel. The two stared up at the wheel, decorated in lights, before walking over to one of the food vendors.