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PERVADE MONTEGO BAY Copyright © 2019 Vanessa Fewings
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever, including Internet usage, without written permission from the author. This story is a work of fiction. References to real people, events, establishments, organizations, or locales are intended only to provide a sense of authenticity and are used fictitiously. All other characters, and all incidents and dialogue are drawn from the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real.
Cover created by: Najla Qamber Designs
Photo images copyright credit:
DepositPhoto: heckmannoleg and mvaligursky
iStock: egorr and cristianl
Shutterstock: Viorel Sima
Formatted by: Champagne Book Design
Book edited by: Debbie Kuhn
ISBN13: 9781733774222
Contents
Title Page
Copyright
Epigraph
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Epilogue
Also from Vanessa Fewings
“The wound is the place where the light enters you.”
—Rumi
For the Members of Vanessa Fewings’ Romance Lounge on Facebook
Emily
I removed my sunglasses and was almost blinded by the blue sky’s brilliance, anticipation swirling inside me as the tall brass gates swung open for my chauffeur driven car.
The estate’s long driveway was lined with palm trees and lush foliage. I lowered my window and let the warm breeze kiss my face, breathing in the exotic scents of Jamaica. The island’s extraordinary beauty had exceeded my expectations.
Royal Court Manor was impressive with its colonial-style design and tropical flower beds—a contrast to James’ castle in England. When I’d visited there, I’d never imagined I’d be seeking him out on foreign soil.
My stomach flipped when I realized how close I was to seeing them. It had been just over a week since I’d received the invite to fly here all the way from London. Yet it felt like a lifetime ago. My last note of responsibility before throwing caution to the winds had been my final exam. During my last days at the Royal Academy of Music, all I could think about was being back in their arms.
Six months ago, I’d met the beautiful and brilliant Xavier Rothschild in a chance meeting on the Underground at Piccadilly. That event had sent me spinning in a new direction. As time went on, our idyllic life had unraveled and I’d discovered he was not the man I thought he was.
Yet I loved him no less.
I’d fallen for two men for entirely different reasons. I loved Xavier Rothschild for his rare beauty and remarkable intellect that even now was startling to comprehend—his ability to interpret the language of artificial intelligence a rare gift.
I’d also fallen hard for his friend. James Ballad was a man of dangerous grace, his authority reaching all the way to the highest echelons of society. I’d personally witnessed that power and even now it sent chills down my spine to think of the influence he had on the world. I’d seen beyond James’ coldness and glimpsed a light he rarely shared. Getting to know him had been exhilarating. It was all I could think about.
Out the back window, I watched the chauffeur remove my luggage and violin case from the boot. I felt butterflies in my stomach and my heart began to beat faster with anticipation, my skin flushing in response. I couldn’t wait to fall into their arms.
James and Xavier both had a complicated past. It was as complex as their futures…our futures. What had once seemed unimaginable had morphed into reality—a ménage à trois that saw three opposites melding together exquisitely in a passionate love affair.
These were the thoughts scratching at my mind as I tried to reassure myself that the decision to come here had been the right one. Not that I could have resisted being reunited with my Xavier. We were connected in ways I couldn’t define.
The car door opened and I climbed out, thanking the driver for fetching me from Sangster International Airport. Then I watched him drive away toward the gate.
I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, and admired the well-tended shrubs and trees and the vibrant beauty of the colorful flowers. The exotic birdsong filling the air reminded me how far I’d come.
I lugged my suitcase up the stone steps and knocked on the ornate wooden door.
No one answered.
The door was unlocked. I stepped inside the foyer and was enveloped by the scent of tropical fruit mixed with ocean air. Excitement twisted my stomach into knots of uncertainty as I looked around the elegant interior with its tall palms resting in ceramic pots. A Louis Vuitton trunk was pressed up against a wall to lend a sophisticated touch. The décor revealed the owner’s desire to make this place into a home.
Dread worked its way into my chest. Why hadn’t Xavier come to greet me?
See, that’s the doubt you let in.
He wouldn’t allow me to get on a plane and fly all the way to Montego Bay if it meant I’d be in danger.
Would he?
The journey had left me grungy and I couldn’t wait to take a shower and freshen up. I welcomed the breeze from the ceiling fan whooshing above that helped cool the interior during the heat of midday.
Respectfully, I slipped off my shoes and left them beside my luggage and violin case.
“Hello!” Making my way barefoot through the house, I peeked into the vast dining room and then the cozy sitting room filled with lush palms, a long couch and a walled TV.
Following the sound of lapping waves, I continued on through the manor to the back of the house and found a door that led outside.
Oh, God, the beauty of it all…
There, beyond the garden and its sparkling pool, was a pristine beach lined with coconut palms. Beyond all those white crystals lay the ocean. To the right was a long dock where a sailing boat was tethered. I allowed myself a few moments to take it all in…
The sound of a sanding tool drew me away from the spectacular scene. I made my way along the rear of the house and peered into an open workspace.
A jolt of happiness hit me when I saw James…
In the center of the space hung an upside down boat�
��the name on its side was faded but I could still read it: Liberty. Some of its worn wooden slats were being refurbished.
James was bare-chested and wearing cream-colored slacks, his toned abs flexing as he dragged a Black & Decker sander along the edge of the boat. His thick hair fell forward in raven waves. I hardly recognized him with his jaw unshaven. His chestnut eyes were focused on the job at hand as he dragged the tool back and forward with impressive precision and strength.
At his castle, I’d seen evidence of his military service in photos captured of him with his fellow Navy officers. His love of boats should have come as no surprise.
Seeing a half-naked James looking sweat-soaked and scruffy was a contradiction to the usual bespoke tailored suits he insisted on wearing. Watching him show off his skill at fixing a boat was a reminder I never knew this man at all—not really.
His dark eyes flittered to meet mine, sending a thrill throughout my body; a delicious frisson…reminding me how easily it had been to fall for him. It was as though he was able to reach into my soul with one look and own me.
He turned off the sander and rested it on the table behind him.
“Hey.” I smiled.
“Emily,” he said with a flash of happiness in his eyes.
Then it was gone.
For a moment, he had seemed like the man I’d gotten to know when I’d experienced his kinder side. He’d spoken my name with feeling.
He ran his fingers through his hair. “How was your flight?”
“Fine.” It had been more than fine. I’d traveled first-class. “It was wonderful. Thank you for my ticket…for inviting me.”
I didn’t care that James was sweating or a little dirty from the work, I needed to be closer…needed to see evidence of the affection he’d shared our last few days together when he’d come to see we were all three perfect for each other.
Hurrying forward, I pressed my cheek to his chest, breathing in his soft cologne mixed with perspiration. Relaxing in his arms, I felt myself surrender again to this mysterious man. All he needed to do was soften toward me again. To remember what we’d had. To offer up a kind smile and conversation that would reassure this tired girl who’d traveled halfway around the world to be here.
Yet there were no strong arms wrapping around me in way of a welcome. I pulled back and stared up at him, my throat tightening with uncertainty.
“Your exams are over?”
“Yes,” I said, glancing around. “I graduated.”
“Congratulations. We’ll celebrate later.”
“Is Xavier here?”
James wiped his hands on a cloth and tossed it aside. “When was the last time you saw him?”
I swallowed hard. “When he saw me off to have dinner with Kitty?”
“Right.”
A feeling of unease crept over me, mixing with the lingering doubt.
“Do you want a drink?” His foreboding eyes studied me.
“No, thank you.” I was too nervous to keep anything down.
“We have a situation, Emily.”
“Oh?”
“Xavier…he’s missing.”
“What do you mean?”
“He left us.” He waved his hand through the air. “The organization.”
Left Pervade?
He refrained from saying what I knew we were both thinking: The last time Xavier had left him. This time, he had left because of me.
“When?”
“The day after you boarded Mr. and Mrs. Zane’s yacht.”
“You think it’s because of me?”
“I believe it’s because he thinks I wanted you to be there that day.”
“Why?”
He looked away. “I hinted at your usefulness.”
“That’s not what you meant, though.”
“What I meant was that you were good for Xavier.”
And I’d been the one to tell Xavier that James saw value in me…
“I can see why he might think it was your idea,” I said warily. “But I went on that yacht of my own accord. I was selected to be part of a concert from the Academy. It was about my career. Andrew Woo was a guest and as the senior conductor, he was the one who could get me into the London Symphony Orchestra.”
My hero, world-famous violinist Diana Zane, had also been aboard that night. After seeing her in concert as a child, I’d begun playing the violin. Not attending the event on board the yacht would have felt like a betrayal of the little girl I’d been who had once dreamed of playing before her idol. I’d sacrificed too much to give up that chance—studied for too many years to abandon my gift.
Though the night had turned deadly.
Squeezing my eyes shut, I pushed away the memory of the Russian man being shoved over the side of the yacht to his death. It had been a facet of Ballad’s identity I’d chosen to ignore because the raw truth of what he was capable of disturbed me.
I’d made a choice that evening…
Regret saturated my bones. Even after all that risk and betrayal and deceit, I still hadn’t landed a coveted place in the orchestra. It had gone to a fellow student, a girl whose father had paid for her place with a generous donation.
I’d been left with nothing.
No, that wasn’t true. James had given me the house in Primrose Hill and the memory of being there with him…with them…had been all I’d clung to over these last few weeks.
To think I’d honestly believed we were going to be reunited in Jamaica. The loss of this hope caused my heart to ache.
“I’ll explain it all to Xavier,” I said.
“We’re out of touch with him, Em.” His tone was harsh.
Pressing my palm to my chest, I ran through the kind of danger Xavier could be in and the vulnerability he faced because of his genius nature. His complexity drove him to make perilous decisions. Like the one he’d made the evening I’d first met him. Stranded in Piccadilly Circus tube station with no money and nowhere to live, he’d risked staying with me for one night.
No words could convey the terror I felt for him now.
“It’s my belief—” James’ tone was filled with sadness. “Xavier feels betrayed by us.”
“That’s why you invited me here?” My throat tightened with the realization of James’ motive. “Us being here will draw Xavier out of hiding?”
“More specifically, you.”
James didn’t say the words I’d been expecting to hear—that he loved me.
Instead, all I’d found here was trouble and cold detachment.
My body slumped against the boat and it swung back on its structure. James stepped forward and caught me, his right arm wrapping around my back as he yanked me toward his chest. He held me suspended with his mouth dangerously close to mine, both of us captured in a moment of intimacy.
In his arms there came that familiar illusion that there was something special between us—a connection that should stretch beyond the confusion and have us finding forgiveness in each other. I saw the longing in his eyes, and his lips brushed against mine as though neither of us could prevent it.
“You’re back under my control, Emily.”
My nipples beaded against his firm muscles. “I thought that you and I…”
“No.”
“I’ll find him without you,” I breathed.
“Impossible. It’s Xavier, remember?”
Pushing him away and finding my footing, I said, “I can try.”
“Did he come to you?” James narrowed his gaze on me. “Has he gotten a message to you?”
“He gave me a new violin.”
“But other than that there’s been no contact between you?”
“The invitation?”
“I placed it in the violin. He wouldn’t know about it.”
“You came into my house? When?”
“When you weren’t there.”
Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to hide the shame I felt at believing we could ever be lovers again.
He rubbed his hands t
ogether. “I need to clean up.”
“You and I, James, what are we to each other?” The words slipped from me.
“We fucked a little. It was pleasant.”
“I’m leaving.”
“With what?” He forced a smile. “Your bank account is closed.”
“I have money—”
“I froze your account.” He leaned back. “You broke our contract, Emily. You disobeyed me.”
“How?”
“You went on the yacht.”
“How can you be so cruel?”
“You knew what I was capable of, Em.”
I swallowed hard. “You think me being here will draw him back to us?”
To me.
“We must be imaginative.”
“How do you mean?”
“We must stir Xavier’s protective side. Have him want to save you.”
“Save me from what?”
His eyes darkened. “Me, of course.”
James
Emily couldn’t know that my heart was shattering—that my intense longing for her was burning me up inside.
All I wanted was to wrap my arms around her. Tell her everything was going to be okay. Instead, my weapon of choice was coldness and occasional silence as I kept myself from reacting to her presence.
She had the kind of beauty that made time stand still. I watched as she stood in front of me, her deep green eyes taking in my boathouse, looking as bewitching as I remembered her.
I knew she loved me.
What she could never know, however, was that I loved her, too. I’d fallen for her more deeply than I had imagined possible.
Her feelings for me would cloud her vision. She could never suspect that inviting her into my sanctuary, a place I kept secret from the world, meant I felt something for her. I hadn’t been prepared for the ache of nostalgia that swept over me upon seeing her again after what had happened between us—or my pining for more time with her and Xavier.
I had to let any chance of us reuniting as a threesome die.
I saw through my own lie…this belief that such weakness shouldn’t be tolerated and that I had a responsibility to remain distant. I had once been certain that my profession didn’t allow for extra-curricular emotional involvement. With anyone.
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