My heart thundered at her words.
“Show me.” I ordered, and Maddy grabbed my hand, dragging me through the crowd and up the stairs to the master bedroom, where I saw my sister, her limp body on the bed and completely unconscious. I checked her pulse, relieved to find she was still breathing, but I wasn’t sure what was going on. Then I noticed her clothing, seams torn in places they shouldn’t have been, and that brought next level rage to the surface. I quickly took stock of the situation, noticing that it was just her shirt that was tattered, and her pants still completely intact.
Thank God.
I gathered her body into my arms and started taking her downstairs, Madison following behind me like a shadow. It’s surprising how quickly a bunch of spoiled academy kids move when they see an unconscious girl.
“Maddy, do you know how to drive?” I asked as we ran down the stairs to Tammy’s car.
“Yes, yes.”
“I’m going to sit with her. I need you to drive us over to the hospital.”
Maddy just nodded her head, and as soon as we were at the car, I nestled Tammy and myself in the backseat.
Maddy started the car and drove as if our lives depended on it, and I found myself praying to God, something I hadn’t done since I was a very small child. With stately, white-pillared homes speeding by the widows, I begged that my sister, my only constant in the world, would survive the night.
11
“It is better to love wisely, no doubt: but to love foolishly is better than not to be able to love at all.”-Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray
Madison
We’d been in the hospital for forty-five minutes. Tammy was taken into a room with some doctors and a couple of nurses. They’d told us that she was breathing, assured us she was fine but that she had severe alcohol poisoning, they’d need to pump her stomach if she had any hope of a full recovery.
Kyler was making me nervous. He’d been pacing up and down the hallway, his fingers sliding through his dark, messy hair constantly. He wasn’t brooding, then angry or swearing, he wasn’t like his normal prideful and cruel self, he actually was genuinely scared. Rattled, at least.
“Kyler, she’s going to be fine. They told us that much.”
Kyler turned to me, his eyes haunted; the regular steel in his blue irises had vanished, replaced with darkly etched sorrow. I stood from my chair and walked to him, recognizing that he needed some sort of comfort. The only problem was that I wasn’t sure what to do. Normally in situations like this, I would’ve offered a hug or a cup of coffee or just sat silently holding the other person’s hand while we waited for news. But with Kyler, all those things just seemed ridiculous. He wasn’t the kind of guy that one would think would need anything, at least nothing that I could offer.
“It’s only been a couple of hours. How the hell did something like this happen in a couple of hours? Where were you? I thought you’d be stuck by her side for the whole night.”
I wasn’t sure how to answer his questions.
“I was with her for the first hour, but then she told me she was going to get a drink and didn’t come back. I waited. I guess I waited too long. Maybe I should’ve gone to find her, but that room felt overwhelming to me. She said she was going to be right back.”
Kyler looked at me. There was a pause before he spoke again and that brief pause worried me, but then what came out of his mouth was so completely unlike him, it actually sounded...reasonable.
“None of this is your fault. I just wanna know what happened. Tammy has been hanging out with a rough crowd lately and those parties are right up their alley. I always thought she knew better, I thought she knew her limits. She’s always had her shit together. I should’ve fucking done something, forced her to stay home, acted like a fucking big brother. But I was too busy with my own shit, too busy being angry at the fucking world.” He looked at me and I could swear that his eyes had begun to pool with tears, but just as quickly as they appeared, they vanished. He quickly turned away from me and started pacing once again, his motorcycle boots making a stomping sound against the tile floor of the hospital. Right then and there, I decided that there was more to Kyler Sinclair than I’d thought.
Even though Kyler was a little scary, and had shown me nothing but cruelty, I still wanted to show him kindness while his sister was still in a hospital bed. I placed my hand gently on his shoulder and Kyler turned around so quickly that I wasn’t even sure if it was humanly possible.
“What part of don’t fucking touch me don’t you understand?”
I moved my hand from him as if he’d dipped it in acid. His words actually stung--they made me feel bad, and worst of all, they made me feel ugly. Maybe he had a thing with only certain girls touching him and I just wasn’t attractive enough or rich enough. Normally, some sort of smart-mouthed answer would have been on my lips to cover up the fact that his words hurt so much, but right now I knew wasn’t the time. Right now we just need to be worried about Tamlin.
“I’m...I’m sorry. It won’t happen again,” I whispered, turning away and sitting down. When I did, he shocked me by sitting beside me, hanging his head and supporting it with his hands. His feet began tapping in a nervous pattern, his thumb moving up and down along the arch of his eyebrow in a soothing rhythm.
“I’m sorry. I just have issues with people touching me.”
“How is that possible?” I asked, gesturing to his arms. “I mean, you have all those tattoos.”
He laughed, turning to look at me then. His laugh was so beautiful; the unguarded smile nearly stole the oxygen from my lungs.
“Nothing about me makes sense, Maddy.” His gaze locked with mine. I couldn’t help noticing that his eyes looked so much more vibrant. Like the bluest sky on a warm summer’s day. “I know what to expect with the tats. A needle plunges into my skin and I disconnect.” He rubbed the back of his neck, making his arm muscles bulge and showing off more of the intricate art wrapping his sinewy muscles. “You have any tats?” He raised his left eyebrow into a perfect, pointed arch.
“Me?” I asked, shocked by his question. “Ummm, no.”
A sinfully slow smile spread across his lips and his eyes took me in as if I was a perfectly grilled steak. That look was so heated, something I’d never seen from him before, that I felt the blush creep up my cheeks, desperately forcing me to look away.
“Too bad,” he said. “You’d look pretty hot with one.”
Hot. Did Kyler Sinclair just say I would look hot? As in attractive?
“You’re also pretty cute when you blush,” he chuckled.
This time I did look away, my warm pink blush now a flaming red. I must’ve looked like a fully cooked lobster. I tried to hide my face behind my hair, letting the strands fall down like a curtain, thinking that it would keep me safe from his gaze. I felt Kyler’s hand gather the bottom of my hair, letting the strands slip in between his fingers.
“I thought you didn’t like touching?” I uttered, hating that I liked the soft touch of his fingers dancing eloquently through my hair, so freaking much.
“I don’t like being touched. No one said anything about me touching you.”
12
“And that taught me you can't have anything, you can't have anything at all. Because desire just cheats you. It's like a sunbeam skipping here and there about a room. It stops and gilds some inconsequential object, and we poor fools try to grasp it - but when we do the sunbeam moves on to something else, and you've got the inconsequential part, but the glitter that made you want it is gone.” ― F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Beautiful and Damned
Kyler
Her hair was beautiful, just like every other part of her. The way it cascaded down her back, how the light made the dark auburn in it shimmer, it was mesmerizing. I loved how my touch made her react with that cute blush, the pink crawling over her smooth, creamy skin. I wanted to follow the path it took with my fingers, maybe even my tongue, and then I hated myself for the thought instantly.
“Am I making you nervous?” I asked, tucking her hair behind her ear. She turned her gaze at me and her eyes were like a sucker punch, intoxicating. This girl in a short time seemed to have embedded herself under my skin like barbed wire, in ways I didn’t even understand.
“You always make me nervous.”
“Sinclair family?” A doctor came into the waiting room, interrupting us. I stood, leaving Madison in the chairs.
“Yes, I'm Kyler Sinclair. Tamlin is my sister. How is she doing? Can we see her?”
“Your sister is stable; she needs to be held overnight for monitoring. She’s asking for you. You can go in to see her now.” The doctor finished and I waved Madison to come with me.
“One person at a time. Please.” The doctor halted Madison right in her spot.
“I’ll be right back. Stay here,” I half-instructed, my tone pleading though.
She only nodded.
“I need a ride to my bike anyway,” I added, as if to offer some explanation why I needed her to stay, before following the doctor to Tammy’s room. When we reached the door, I took a deep breath. I really wasn’t sure what I wanted to say to my sister, all I really wanted to do was yell and demand to know who had left her in that room alone. However, that wasn’t what Tammy needed right now, so instead, I was going to play the role of a supportive and loving brother. Well...as loving as a guy like me could be.
Seeing my sister in that hospital bed was unnerving. She was laying there, her skin a sickening shade of alabaster, an IV lodged in her arm. She didn’t look like the vibrant, sassy girl I knew; she looked broken and defeated.
I wasn’t fucking equipped to deal with this shit. Another reason to be pissed at my parents. I’d tried calling multiple times, I’d left a barrage of messages, and yet they still weren’t here.
“Hey, Tams,” I said, holding her hand in both of my own. She looked up at me, forcing a small smile through her dry lips.
“I really stepped in it this time, didn’t I, Ky?”
“I wouldn’t worry about it; you have a big brother that is an utter disappointment. This is nothing,” I joked.
“Is Maddy ok?” she asked, her voice strained and low, almost a whisper. My thinly held rage at her condition was rising, making me feel like the frustrated and helpless monster inside was about to explode.
“What happened, Tammy?” I asked, my voice straining to control the volume.
“I was drinking, a lot. Then I went into a room to lay down and the next thing I knew I woke up here. I didn’t drink that much though, Kyler, I swear. No more than I usually do. I really don’t know what happened.”
“Miss Sinclair?” the doctor said, walking into the room. “Hello, I’m Dr. Abbott; I just wanted to talk to you about what happened tonight. Your blood work came back and it looks like there were traces of Rohypnol in your system. Do you know how that could have happened?”
My vision bled red. Some fucker was trying to rape my sister. I was going to go back to that party and beat the living fuck out of every single guy I saw until I had the truth.
“Mother fuckers.” I paced the room. Pacing was something I could do, it was something I had control of when everything else around me felt like it was on its axis, tilting and on the verge of losing complete control.
“I was drinking, talking to a few football players… It was a party. I could swear I had my drink with me the whole time. I have no idea how anyone would have the opportunity.”
“I gotta go,” I spat.
“Kyler, don’t. Don’t do anything stupid,” Tammy called after me, but I’d already decided what needed to happen. I headed back to the waiting room. I was an asshole but not so big an asshole that I would leave Maddy waiting on me for God knows how long.
“I have to go back to the house.” I popped my head into the waiting room and then walked on purposeful strides towards the entrance.
“Kyler, wait up,” Maddy said, running after me. “I’m coming with you.” She stopped me in my tracks, steel in her spine, trying to make herself look bigger than she was.
“Whatever. Just stay the fuck out of my way.”
“So we’re back to this again?” she asked, stopping just outside the doors again.
“Look, mouse, we had a moment. That’s all it was, a fucking moment. I don’t have time to deal with your hurt fucking feelings. I have shit to do.”
She looked at me with those soulful, warm eyes. Those goddamn eyes. Things would be a lot easier if she didn’t have the most beautiful fucking eyes I’d ever seen.
I sighed, turning to her. “Some fucker gave my sister the date rape drug. I’m going to go back there and kick the shit out of every low life scumbag until I get some fucking answers. Those motherfuckers messed with the wrong girl. Give me the keys.”
“No.” Her voice shook, but determination shaded her gaze. “I’m not letting you go half-cocked to make things worse than they already are.”
I couldn’t believe that she actually thought she now had the right to tell me what to do. Nobody told me what to do. I walked up to her, inserting myself right in her face.
“You are nothing. You don’t matter. Now give me the fucking keys.” I went in my pocket and took out a crumpled fifty and threw it by her feet. “Call a cab and keep the change.”
I held my hand out, waiting.
“Fuck you.” She snatched the keys out of her pocket and held them in the air. I was a little shocked at the vulgarity coming out of her mouth. “If you’re going, I’ll drive you. Someone has to be there so your poor mother doesn’t have to shuffle between the hospital and a prison cell. Now let’s go.”
“Whatever, mouse.”
13
“Before him he saw two roads, both equally straight; but he did see two; and that terrified him--he who had never in his life known anything but one straight line. And, bitter anguish, these two roads were contradictory.” ― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
Madison
In under ten minutes, we were back at the party. Kyler jumped out of the car before I’d even placed it in park. He was so reckless and out of control. I wasn’t sure what he was hoping to get by coming here. None of these people would admit anything to him. I’m sure to the outside world it would look like another reason for Kyler to act out, but I’d seen how ruined he was as we waited for news about Tammy.
“Go home!” he yelled at me as he walked to the party. I parked the car and ran after him.
“Oh no, I’m not going anywhere,” I said once I was by his side. Kyler stopped walking, turning to look at me.
“Go home, mouse. I can’t be worried about you. I told you, I have shit to do.”
“You really think going in there and threatening everyone is going to do something?” I moved in between him and the front door. Kyler peered down on me, his height completely engulfing, making me feel every bit the mouse in comparison to him. He was larger than life.
“Listen, Maddy, some fucker in there drugged my sister in the hopes of raping her. You better believe I’m going in there to pound some faces in, until the fucker admits what he did.” His normally blue eyes were dark and cloudy, he grabbed his lip ring between his teeth and I was worried that his temper would pull it out, violently. “Maddy, you either have to move out of my way or I’m going to have to move you.” He stood there, just watching me, and when I didn’t move, he placed his arms around my waist and lifted me off the ground, then placed me to his side. Once I was in place--as if I was nothing more than a discarded toy--he marched into the house, almost kicking two kids sitting nearby.
“Kyl
er, please!” I begged, chasing after him. But he ignored me, moving quickly to the kitchen. Once he was there, he grabbed the first football player by the collar and hoisted him up against the wall.
“Who drugged my sister?” He asked, calmly, venom lacing his words. The football player twisted his face in shock, his hands raised into the air, his drink falling on the floor, clear liquid splattering like a Jackson Pollock painting. I grabbed Kyler’s arm, trying to get him to leave the guy alone and look at me. I wasn’t sure why I thought I could get Kyler to stop what he was doing. All he’d done was treat me like garbage before now.
Except in the waiting room.
For a second, I could see reason flash in his eyes. The insanity in them evaporated. Then he looked down at my arm and I immediately moved it as I remembered his aversion to being touched. Only this time he didn’t yell at me, this time he let go of the guy and let him slide to the floor in a relieved slump.
“Make sure you pass it around. Tell your fucking asshole buddies that if any of them go near Tamlin Sinclair they are dead.” He then turned, grabbing my hand and heading to the door.
“From first string quarterback to loser. What happened, Kyler? We used to look up to you, now you’re a waste of life. Your sister? Nothing but a slut. She was begging for it. Dressing the way she does, flirting with anyone with a cock,” the guy said, swaying as he stood, obviously very drunk.
Kyler dropped my hand and tumbled the guy onto the floor. He was on top of the football player, pummeling his fist into the other guy’s face without mercy. Pure white rage took over Kyler--he was merciless and violent. Blood dribbled and spurt from the football player’s face. I didn’t know what to do, I stood frozen, shock cemented on my face, but then the guy went limp and I was shocked into moving.
Ruthless: Black Mountain Academy Page 5