by Caitlyn Dare
“Fuck,” I bark. “I shouldn’t be doing this.”
“I shouldn’t be letting you, more like,” she counters.
“No, you should be resting.”
Reaching behind me, I pull my hoodie from my body and drop it to her bedroom floor, quickly followed by my boots, socks, and sweatpants. Once I’m standing in just my boxers, I reach for her.
The second her feet leave the floor, she wraps her legs around my waist and her arms around my neck. I hold her tight to me and breathe her in. I don’t deserve this, but fuck if I’m going to point that out right now.
With her still clinging to me, I pull the sheets back and slide us both into her bed. I settle us so we’re laying on our sides, our bodies pressed together and our noses only a breath apart.
“Ace, what are you—”
“Sssh, Princess. For once, I’m doing the right thing. Please don’t fight me.”
I pull her into me tighter, and, after only a few minutes, her breathing evens out, telling me that I did indeed do the right thing.
I lie there awake almost all night, holding her and thanking whoever the fuck will listen, for her allowing me this time.
She might wake up in the morning and regret every second of it or remember all the things I confessed and want nothing more to do with me. Either is a real possibility. But for now, I’ll just enjoy having her here, holding me as if she needs me as much as I need her.
The sun appears through the curtains all too soon, and it’s not long later that an alarm starts up and Remi stirs in my arms. She stills the moment realization dawns on her that she’s not in bed alone. After a few seconds she risks a look up at me.
“Morning, Princess.”
Remi blinks at me a few times. “I thought it was a dream.”
I can’t help but smile at the fact that she didn’t call it a nightmare. “I guess that all depends on what the dream was about.”
“Just that you were here, holding me.”
“Then I can confirm that it’s reality.”
She falls silent for a moment as she thinks. “All those things you said last night… were they…”
“True?” I finish for her. “Every single one.”
“Jesus. So you really have no idea if your dad is your dad?”
As relieved as I am that that’s the first thing she chooses to focus on after all the other confessions I gave her, I kinda hoped she might focus on another. Like me admitting how I really feel for her. I may not have given her those three little words, but I got damn close.
“Nope. I have no idea who to believe at his point.”
“Maybe you should speak to James about it. He might—”
“No.”
“Ace,” she says softly, placing her hot palm on my chest. “I heard everything you said last night, and I understand your issue with him. But aside from your dad, he might be the only one who knows the truth.”
“Maybe, but I’m not ready to go there yet. Please promise me you won’t either.”
“Of course I won’t. Everything you told me last night, it’s between us.”
I stare down at her, the connection that’s always between us crackling away.
“What?” she asks, her already rosy cheeks darkening under my gaze.
“I really want to fuck you.”
She bites down on her bottom lip, and it doesn’t make my situation any more comfortable. “Well, I’m right here.”
Fuck, it’s so fucking tempting to just roll her over, rip those shorts from her body and slide right into her. But I can’t.
Not yet.
“No.”
“N-No?” she stutters in disbelief.
I roll us over, but that’s the only part of that previous fantasy I allow to happen. “The next time I’m inside you, it’ll be because I deserve it. Because I’ve proved to you that I can be what you need. Not because you feel bad about my fucked-up past.”
“Ace, no. That’s not what—”
“I know, but it’s off the back of all of that, and I want it to be about us.” Lowering my mouth to hers, I cut off any argument she might have. “Get dressed. I’m taking you for breakfast before school.”
“Oh yeah?” She beams.
“Yeah, if I can’t have sex then I, at least need decent food to make up for it.”
“Okay,” she agrees, jumping from the bed. “But I need to shower first.” She drops her hands to the hem of her tank and pulls it up over her head. “Join me?” she asks before throwing the fabric at my head.
I catch it, but at no point do I take my eyes off her back. “Turn around, Princess,” I demand.
But the little minx pushes her thumbs into the waistband of her shorts and pushes them down her legs, giving me the most perfect view of her ass.
“Fucking hell,” I groan, my already hard cock pulsing in frustration.
“Wanna see the front? Then I suggest you follow me.” She’s gone before I blink. It’s the sound of the shower running that gets me moving.
She’s already under the spray by the time I step into the bathroom. “Hey,” she says shyly. Her hands lift to her hair and the water streams down between and over her breasts, her pink and pert nipples just begging to be sucked on.
How the fuck am I meant to resist?
Fuck breakfast. I’ve just found something much more fulfilling.
Chapter Nine
Remi
I shouldn’t be doing this. But I can’t stop.
I need him.
I need Ace the way thunder needs lightning.
His piercing blue eyes drink me in as I lather soap over my body, paying careful attention to my breasts.
“Fuck, Remi,” he breathes, torment etched into his expression.
Ace wants to do the right thing. He doesn’t want to rush me into making a decision I’ll regret, but right now, I really, really need him to be the reckless bad boy I know he can be.
I let my fingers glide down my stomach, shivering at my own touch. The water makes everything so slippery, so good.
“You’re not playing fair, Princess.” The words vibrate deep in his throat.
“Maybe it’s my turn to play dirty,” I say.
His eyes grow hooded, and I can feel his thin rope of resolve slipping.
Ace makes quick work of removing his boxers and slips into the shower with me. It’s much smaller than the one at his house. Our bodies brush up against each other as he faces me away from him and slides his hands around my waist.
“I’ve got you.” His voice cracks with emotion as he slowly begins to wash me.
“God, that feels good.” I lean my head back on his shoulder, relishing the way his fingers dance over my skin, tracing the curves of my hip. He lets his hand dip lower, slipping between my thighs.
“Ace,” I cry out as he rubs my clit. But no sooner has he started, that his fingers move on to my stomach. “Hey...”
“Patience,” is all he says, continuing his thorough exploration of my body. “I want to remember this moment.”
“Oh yeah, and why’s that?” I ask.
His lips brush my ear, sending a shiver rolling up my spine. “In case you realize what a fuck-up I am and decide you’re better off without me.”
My heart clenches at his honesty. “Ace, I would—”
“Ssh. Let me enjoy this. I’ll never be good enough for you, Remi, but I’ll try harder, I swear.”
I spin around and throw my arms around his neck, kissing him with everything I have. He’s hard and ready at my stomach, and my core throbs. “I want you,” I whisper against his lips, afraid of where this might take us.
“Fuck, baby, I want nothing more than to sink deep inside you, to feel your tight pussy squeezing me, but I made a promise. And I intend on keeping it.” Ace kisses the end of my nose before turning me back around. “Now, just enjoy it,” he orders.
It doesn’t take long before I’m a breathless, writhing mess. Ace strums my body the way a guitarist plays his instrument: wit
h care and attention, precision and skill.
“Fuck, Ace, I’m going to...” He grabs my face, bringing my mouth to his. His tongue laps at mine as his pinches my clit, sending me flying off the edge.
He dips his fingers inside me and then pushes them into my mouth, licking them clean with me. “You taste so. Fucking. Good.”
“My turn,” I say, eager to taste him. Maybe we should wait to have sex again, but it doesn’t mean there aren’t other things we can enjoy.
I reach around me to grab his cock, but he snags my wrist. “Not yet.”
“What the hell?” I’m about to tell him he doesn’t get to call the shots when he pushes me up against the tiles. Taking my hands in his, he presses my palms flat at either side of my head.
“I haven’t earned that yet,” he says, curling his big body over mine.
“Isn’t that for me to decide?” I wiggle my ass up against him, yelping as his hand cracks against my skin. It stings like a bitch, but I can’t deny the flash of pleasure that follows.
“Hands on the wall, Princess, and keep fucking still, got it?”
All I can do is nod, I’m wound so tight. Ace steps away from me, taking his warmth. I glance back, but he isn’t looking at my face. His eyes are roaming over my body as if it’s a treasure map he needs to decode.
“Eyes on the wall.” His voice is thick with lust. I feel him move closer, and next thing I know his foot kicks mine, forcing my legs wider. “Do you have any idea how fucking hot you look like this?” Ace trails a single finger down my spine. My body hums with anticipation, the thrill of not knowing where or how he’ll touch me almost too much to bear.
“Do you trust me?” he asks, and I nod. There’s a thud behind me, a rush of warm air, then Ace is right there, his face buried between my ass, licking at me like a man starved.
“Ace,” I cry, completely overwhelmed at the sudden intrusion. “Oh God, what are you...” The words die in my throat as he licks me back to front, pushing his tongue deep inside me. My legs shudder around him as I try desperately to maintain my position. But it feels too good. His hands curve around my hips, pulling me into him so my back is slightly arched.
“Ooooh fuck.” It comes out a breathy mess as he takes a greedy swipe of me again before pushing two fingers inside me. “You want more?” he asks, his rumble of laughter vibrating against my most intimate place.
It’s so dirty, but it feels so fucking good, I can’t stop him.
“Y-yes.” I barely choke out over the intense waves of pleasure rising inside me as he works me with his fingers. He dives back in, eating me out like he was born to do it.
“Come for me, Remi, baby. Show me how much you want it.” His words are my undoing as I shudder around him. Pulling his fingers away, he lets them slide between my ass cheeks, lingering there. This time, I can’t resist glancing down at him. My brow rises and he smiles up at me with a wolfish grin. “One day,“ his voice is a possessive growl that has my toes curling, “I’m going to own every single inch of you.”
I don’t tell him that he already does.
“I don’t think that’ll ever get old,” I say as Ace pulls up outside Cali Soul. It’s a little diner on the way to school but tends to attract passing traffic rather than a local crowd, which is exactly why I chose it.
He helps me off his bike and takes the helmet. “And I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the feel of you wrapped around me.”
“Ace...” I flush, need already building inside me again. Even after the way he’d made come in the shower, and again before we finally left the house.
Mom will kill me if she knows what we did up against the kitchen counter as I attempted to make us coffee. But what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.
He smiles—an honest-to-god smile—as he stands and takes my hand. “What’s good here? I’m starving.” But the way his eyes leisurely rake down my school uniform tells me it isn’t the pancakes he’s hungry for.
I still can’t believe he wouldn’t let me touch him, but part of me loved that he’s willing to punish himself for hurting me.
What can I say? Ace makes me crazy.
We enter the diner and a server tells us to find an empty booth. Ace slides in right after me, slinging his arm over my shoulder, and reads from the menu in my hand.
“I like this you,” I say, gazing up at him.
“Yeah?” He leans in, brushing his nose over mine before stealing a kiss. “Good fucking job, because you’re stuck with me now.”
“I’ve been thinking, maybe we should talk to your uncle.” Peeking up at him, I try to gauge his reaction. I don’t want to push, but after everything he’s been through, he deserves some answers.
Ace is stiff, his jaw clenched impossibly tight. “Hey.” I run my hand along his arm. “We can do it together. I’m not going anywhere.”
His eyes flicker to mine, swirling with so much pain I want to take it from him and make it my own. “Shit, Princess, you can’t ask me to...” He drags in a shuddering breath and then says two little words that make me believe we can weather the storm.
“Yeah, okay.”
“Okay?” Hope blossoms inside me.
“But I’m only doing this for you. To prove to you that I want to change. That I want to be the kind of guy you deserve.”
“Ace, that’s not—” His pierced brow quirks up, and I swallow my protests. “Thank you,” I whisper.
The server comes to take our order and Ace orders one of nearly everything.
“Hungry?” I ask, and his nostrils flare.
“I’m beginning to think I should have fucked you in the shower after all. This sucks.”
My cheeks heat as I glance around to make sure no one is within earshot. “I know something I can suck, if you want to drop this self-punishment act you’ve got going on.” I lift a finger to my lips and draw it into my mouth.
Ace yanks my hand away, gawking at me like I’ve grown a second head. “Do you want me to pounce on you right here?”
“Maybe.” I grin.
“Fuck, I’ve created a monster.”
I tuck myself into his side, soaking up the good vibes between us. “Only for you,” I let out a little sigh of contentment.
I know no one will understand why I’ve forgiven him so easily, but sometimes love makes no sense. It doesn’t come with a set of predefined rules or a playbook. It’s messy and raw and chaotic.
Love is about finding light in the darkness, those little slices of quiet in the noise.
Ace Jagger might be everything I shouldn’t want, but he’s everything I never knew I needed.
He might be cold but his touch burns.
He might be cruel but his kiss is sweet.
Ace might pretend not to care, but it’s only because he doesn’t know how to love.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?” He whispers the words against my hair.
“Just thinking.”
“About me?”
“Always.”
“Even when you hated me?”
I tip my head to meet his eyes. “Especially when I hated you. When I woke up in the hospital, the first person I wanted was you. But I knew what you’d done. I knew you’d hurt me. I tried not to care... I tried so fucking hard...”
He cups my face in his hands, his eyes brimming with guilt. “Never again, Princess, I promise.”
“I know.”
“I came to see you... I’d bribe the nurses to let me into your room. There was this one—“
“Delores,” I say around a smile.
“How did you know?”
“Oh, she’s a fully-fledged member of the Ace Jagger fan club.”
“Is that so?”
“We still need to figure out how the tape got out. It’s the only way anyone will understand this.”
His eyes darken. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“It means, I don’t care what people think, but my mom, James, even my dad, they’re not going to take it easy o
n you, unless—”
“I fix my mess.”
I nod. “I believe you. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t. But someone set you up, Ace. Someone wanted to humiliate me at my party and destroy our relationship.”
He goes eerily quiet, as if he’s replaying that night over in his head. After a beat, he lets out a frustrated breath. “You don’t think I haven’t racked my brain for an answer?” Shame clings to every word. “There was no way for anyone to even know about the camera let alone... fuck.”
“Ace, what is it?” Dread pools in my stomach.
“After we...” He grinds his teeth. “And I left, I thought I heard something outside the pool house, but I was too pissed to stick around.”
“You think someone was... spying on us?”
“It would make sense. If they heard everything go down...”
“Michaela.” The word falls from my mouth before I can even consider the consequences.
“Your sister?”
“Stepsister,” I grit out. “I saw her the day of my party. She said some things.”
“What things?”
I press my lips together, unsure whether to tell him. Everything from that day is still hazy, but I can still remember her cruel smile as she looked over me in La Dolce Vita.
“She said you’d told her we were done. Said she’d helped to comfort you.”
“What the fuck?” Ace rears back, startling the server as she brings our food.
“Is everything okay?” Her concerned gaze flicks to mine, and I nod. I know what people see when they look at us. The big bad tattooed guy with the prep school princess. And I suppose they’re not all wrong. But they don’t know Ace like I do.
“Thank you,” I reply. “This all looks great.”
“Can I get you any—”
“We’re good, thanks.”
She hesitates before hurrying away.
“She was scared of me,” Ace grunts.
“A lot of people are scared of you.” I slide my hand along his jaw and force him to look at me.
“Are you scared of me?”
I inhale a shaky breath, choosing my next words carefully. “I know you’ll never hurt me, but I’d be lying if I said that sometimes your temper doesn’t scare me.” His eyes shutter. “Hey,” I say. “I’m just scared that one day all the anger and pain you feel will get the better of you... and that I’ll lose you.”