by Caitlyn Dare
“Ace doesn’t love me.” The words are out before I can stop them.
Conner smirks. “If that’s what you think, then you’re dumber than I thought. I know my brother, and I’ve never seen him the way he is with you, ever. You’re changing him, Remi.”
“I...”
“Cat got your tongue?” He chuckles.
“I should go.”
“But me and you, we’re good, right?”
“Yeah, we’re good.” Shouldering the door, I climb out and traipse toward the house. Being ambushed by my mom is bad enough, but my dad? That’s a whole other headache I don’t want to deal with.
“Remi, is that you?” she calls the second I step inside. “We’re in the living room.”
I shake my head with disbelief. We rarely use the living room, but of course Mom would want to do this in there. Even now, appearances are still everything to her.
Grabbing a juice carton from the refrigerator, I make my way down the hall. The second I enter the room, I can tell it’s bad.
“How was school, sweetheart?” Mom asks.
“It was okay, I guess.”
“I had an interesting chat with Michaela earlier,” Dad says through pursed lips.
“Really?” I balk. “That’s how you’re going to start this? Can’t you even try and pretend you heard it from someone else, anyone else?” Betrayal coils around my heart.
I wish I didn’t know how me and Dad got to this point, but the sad fact is, I do.
Michaela drove herself between us and refused to budge.
And he let it happen.
“Your sister—”
“She is not my sister.” Anger vibrates inside my chest. “When are you going to wake up and realize that Michaela hates me?”
“Now wait a second, young lady.” The vein in Dad’s head pulsates. “I realize Michaela can be difficult sometimes, but you don’t make it easy for her to—”
“I don’t make it easy? Me?” My jaw hangs open.
“Remi,” Mom rushes out. “Why don’t we all just calm down?” She shoots my dad a scathing look.
“Oh for the love of God, Sarah, wake up and see what is happening here. That thug is corrupting our daughter.”
“Thug? How dare you call Ace a—”
“He filmed you having... sex, Remi.” Disgust clings to every word. “It’s a good thing you were eighteen, or I’d be pursuing sex offence charges.”
“Sex offence charges...” I murmur with disbelief. “So that’s how it's going to be now? You don’t give a crap about my life until I make some bad choices and then you decide to actually show up and be a father.”
“So you admit your relationship with the Jagger boy is a bad choice?”
My eyes narrow. “You know that’s not what I mean. Stop putting words into my mouth. Me and Ace have smoothed things over.”
“He took your virginity and recorded it, Remi. For God’s sake, have some self-respect.”
“Enough.” Mom leaps up, tears clinging to her eyelashes. “That’s enough.”
I fold my arms over my waist and let out a little huff of exasperation.
“Tell her, Sarah,” Dad says. “Tell her we don’t want her to see that boy anymore.”
“What part of ‘I’m eighteen now’ don’t you understand, Dad? What I do with my life and who I do it with is my decision.”
“Remi, please,” Mom begs.
“Seriously, you’re taking his side? You know how Michaela treats me at school—”
“What on Earth is she talking about, Sarah?”
“Like you don’t know, Dad,” I grumble.
“It’s nothing, Paul. Just girls being girls.”
My eyes bug out, disbelief coursing through my veins. “Mom?”
I’ve never bothered to tell Dad about Michaela’s hate campaign against me, but I assumed Mom had at least broached it with him.
“This is pointless.” I throw up my hands, done with this conversation. “I’m not going to quit seeing Ace. He says he didn’t play that recording at the party, and I believe him.”
“Are you listening to this, Sarah?” Dad scoffs. “That boy is nothing but trouble, Remi. I refuse to sit by and watch him ruin your life.”
I leap up, my chest heaving. “That’s rich coming from you, Dad. You swanned off with your new family and left us behind like we were nothing. You fucking ruined my life, and I’m done. I’m so done.”
Mom calls after me, but I’m out of the house before she can catch up. I take off running toward the beach, indignation burning through me.
Pulling my cell out of my pocket, I dial Ace’s number but it rings out.
Remi: Call me when you can.
I swipe at the tears falling. I don’t want to cry, not over this.
Not over him.
But I can’t believe what just happened.
My relationship with my father has always been tenuous, ever since he upped and left. But he’s never made me feel more worthless than he did just now.
I glance back, spotting him and Mom on the terrace, searching for me, but I don’t stop, following the beach toward school. Dialing Hadley’s number instead, I barely manage to greet her as an ugly sob rips from my lungs.
“Remi?”
“C-can I come hang out at yours?”
“Girl, of course. You don’t have to ask, you know that. Is everything okay?”
“No,” I confess, all the pain and rejection of the last four years swelling inside me. “But it will be.”
I'm done with my father.
Done pretending we mean anything to each other.
Done playing happy family to abate his guilt.
As far as I’m concerned, Michaela is welcome to him.
“I’ve got Twizzlers, Swedish Fish, Nerds, or Jolly Ranchers.” Hadley glances back at me.
“You have a problem.” My brow rises as I suppress a smirk.
“So what? I like a little sugar fix now and again.” She bites the ends off a Twizzler.
“I’ll take a box of Ranchers.” She throws me one and I catch it, tearing it open.
Hadley’s room at Sterling Prep is like every other dorm room here: big, spacious, and worth every cent of its ridiculous price tag. Each student gets an en suite room in one of three dorm buildings situated in the grounds behind the main buildings. Then small groups share a communal kitchen and games room. Right now, as I stretch out in her queen-sized bed, I almost envy her.
“So what did you say?” she asks.
“I should have told him to go fuck himself.”
“Jesus, Remi.” She presses her lips together. “Why don’t you say it how it really is?”
I’m distracted by the vibration of my cell. Ace’s name flashes across my screen and relief floods me.
Ace: Got held up. You need me to come get you?
Remi: Held up where?
Ace: Don’t you trust me, Princess?
“Let me guess, your knight-in-inked-armor?” Hadley smirks and I flip her off.
Remi: I trust you... I just don’t want you to get hurt again.
Or worse—I don’t want him to hurt someone else. But I don’t want to give him cause to doubt my faith in him. Not when he’s trying so hard.
Ace: I’ll tell you everything later, I promise.
Remi: Okay... be safe. xo
“Geez, you have it so bad.”
“Do not.” I stick my tongue out at her.
“It’s written all over your face. Ace and Remi sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in a baby carri—”
“Stop, already. I get it. I’m worse than a lovesick puppy.”
“It looks good on you, though. He looks good on you.” She hesitates.
“But?”
“But are you sure you can trust him... after everything?”
I let out a weary sigh. Hadley is the one person I don’t mind questioning where my head’s at, because I know her motives are pure. She’s my f
riend. She isn’t worried that Ace will tarnish my reputation or corrupt my soul.
Okay, maybe she is a little, but she’ll still be there to pick up the pieces if it all goes to shit.
“I know what it looks like to everyone, but isn’t it part of lov...” I swallow the words, “caring for someone about giving them another chance? Ace knows he screwed up. And I know he’s not perfect. But neither am I.”
“I get it,” she says quietly. “You can’t help who you fall for.” Sadness etches into her expression.
“You know, you never did tell me your story.”
“I’m still not ready to talk about it.” Hadley gives me a weak smile.
“Well, when you are, I’ll be here.”
“But you should know, I know what it feels like to be ostracized for loving the wrong person. The only difference is you have the power to choose for yourself, I didn’t. Don’t ever let people shame you for the way you feel.”
“I won’t,” I say, because something tells me she needs to hear it right now.
“Good. Besides, I need some vicarious action.” Hadley’s brows waggle. “Details, girl. I need all the glorious details.”
“We didn’t actually... ya know.”
“Bump uglies, fuck like rabbits, have mind-blowing, earth-shattering sex? Why the hell not?”
“Well, at first, I put the brakes on. He hurt me, Hads, he really hurt me.” The lingering trace of betrayal clenches my heart. “I didn’t just want to throw myself at him. But then one thing led to another and that to another and I tried to touch him and...”
“He’s punishing himself.”
“How the hell do you know that?”
She shrugs. “I know things. Besides, Ace is a complete control freak. It makes perfect sense that he’d forbid himself the one thing he wants more than anything.”
“So you don’t think it’s a bit... over the top?”
“Has it stopped him touching you?”
“No.” My cheeks burn.
“So let him do his thing. God, can you imagine how hot it’s going to be when he finally lets it happen?”
I can now.
My stomach clenches, a shiver rippling through me.
“Man, I miss that.” She flounces down on the bed beside me, gnawing on the stick of candy. “I miss the toe-curling kisses and butterfly-inducing touches.”
“What about Hayden?” I nudge her shoulder with mine. “He likes you.”
“Yeah, but it’s Hayden. We’re just friends. I don’t want nice, I want exhilarating. I want what you and Ace have.” Her eyes flick to mine.
“Well, keep your hands off my man.” Our laughter fills the room.
“What do you make of Cole?”
“Cole? No way. Don’t even think about it.”
“I don’t mean for me, silly.” But there’s something in her tone that makes me think she’s thought about it. “He’s so broody. At practice he barely utters a word.”
“Yeah, he’s a strange one. Him and Conner are like—”
“Water and gasoline.”
“Something like that,” I mumble.
A knock at the door startles us and Hadley clambers off the bed. “Maybe it’s Hayden,” I tease. But the sharp intake of her breath as she opens the door has me craning my neck to see who it is.
“Cole?” I leap up at the sight of him standing there.
“Ace asked me to stop by and make sure you’re okay.”
Hadley swoons, a dreamy expression falling over her, but it quickly morphs into a frown. “Wait a second, how did you know where my dorm room was?”
Cole’s expression gives nothing away. “I asked your boyfriend.”
“Boyfr—Hayden? Oh, he’s not my—”
“Don’t care.”
“Rude much?”
“You just got finished with practice?” I ask him.
“Yeah. Conner is coming to pick me up. You want a ride? We’re going to hang out at the pool house until Ace gets back.”
“And where is that brother of yours?”
Cole’s mask slides back into place, and I know he won’t give up his brother's whereabouts.
“Fine. You go with Conner, I’ll speak to Ace later.”
“Or we could all go?” Hadley chimes.
“No,” Cole says as I reply, “For real?”
“Yeah, why not.” She drills Cole with a harsh look. “It’s not like I have anything better to do.”
“You can’t come with us.”
“Cole!”
“Do you have a problem with me or something?” Hadley cocks her hip.
“Relax, Hads. Cole doesn’t mean anything by it, do you Cole?” My eyes widen at him.
“Yeah, whatever. I’ll be outside in the lot.” He takes off and Hadley snickers.
“He’s... interesting.”
“You’re not coming to try and—”
“What? No! I thought you might appreciate the company. Besides, it beats another night of watching Magic Mike reruns.”
“There is something very wrong with you.”
“Hey, takes one to know one.”
“Yeah, yeah. Come on,” I say shoving my feet into my sneakers. “We should probably go before they take off without us.”
Hadley disappears into her bathroom, and I quickly text Ace.
Remi: Coming to the pool house... bringing Hadley, hope that’s okay?
Ace: As long as she’s good hanging out with Conner and Cole, I don’t give a fuck.
Remi: Ace, we can't just abandon her with the twins.
Ace: If she’s going to be around, it’s probably a good thing for her to learn how to handle them.
“Ready?” She reappears, and I’m sure she’s put more makeup on. Her lips are glossy and her eyes are smoky.
“You look... nice.”
“Oh, don’t give me that look. It doesn’t hurt to make an effort.” Hadley heads for the door, and I text Ace back.
Remi: I don’t think it’s Hadley we need to worry about.
Ace: What the fuck does that mean?
I smile to myself. Hadley and Cole is not a good idea, but part of me can’t deny I’d pay to see him try to dodge her advances. She might be the black sheep of the cheer squad, but one thing, Hadley Rexford is not a pushover.
Remi: Nothing, don’t worry... I’ll see you soon.
His reply is instant.
Ace: I will always worry where you’re concerned.
Chapter Twelve
Ace
The gravel leading to the auto shop crunches under my wheels as I make my way off the main road. This place is pretty much No Man’s Land. It’s not part of the Bay, but equally it’s not in the Heights, either.
I like it.
It fits me, seeing as I don’t really belong in either place right now.
I thought the Heights would always be my home, but after going back there that night, I realized it stopped being that the day I left. That place will always be in my blood, but I’m not sure I could go back to living there. Although I have a suspicion Donny wouldn’t allow it. He runs that place, and what he says goes. And he clearly doesn’t want me there any longer.
There are cars scattered everywhere. Some look pretty new, others even more beat-up than my brothers’ Ford, which really is saying something. The place is steeped in darkness, and I wonder if it’s already shut for the night when a guy emerges from the side of the building. He’s dressed in all black with heavy ink running up his arm. He is not at all what I was expecting.
He tilts his chin in my direction, and I bring my bike to a stop a little in front of him before jumping off. “Hey, you Gunner?”
“Yeah, but G is just fine. Only my mom and sister call me that,” he says fondly. “You Ace?”
“Sure am.”
Ellen didn’t say that she was going to ring ahead, but I can’t say that I’m surprised.
“Ellen said she might have the perfect laborer for me. I’ve been waiting for her call.”
“So what is it you need?”
He pulls a pack of smokes from his back pocket before offering one to me. Having run out of my own, I accept and put it between my lips to light up.
“You any good with engines?” he asks, gesturing for me to follow him into the shop.
“I guess. I keep this thing running and help with my brothers’ heap of shit car.”
“We do all sorts here. But I’m looking for someone to pick up a few hours. It’s going to be dirty work—cleaning up, making coffee, that kind of thing.”
“Yeah, whatever you need, man.”
“Great. My last guy decided he was too good for this place and fucked off to the military.”
“That won’t be happening here.”
“Good to know. So you grew up in the Heights, eh?”
“Born and bred.” I nod.
We chat for a bit longer. Gunner talks about his love of restoring vintage cars and his dream of opening a chain of auto shops. We talk hours and pay, and almost an hour later, I agree to come back tomorrow after school for my first shift.
For the first time in... possibly ever, I feel like things are looking up.
Remi’s forgiven me, I’ve left my life in the Heights behind, and I’ve got a proper job for once in my life. Maybe this move to the Bay isn’t so bad after all.
Knowing that she’s going to be in the pool house waiting for me, I rev the bike and push the speed a little higher in my need to get to her.
The sound of music spills out into the yard as I make my way toward where they’re hanging out, and I can’t help a smile spread across my lips. When I get to the door, I find Remi and Hadley nestled on the couch and my brothers sprawled over the beanbags, drinking beers.