by Ivy Nelson
“I might need to go socialize with some other people here if you don’t mind. There are a couple of sadists I’ve played with before who approached me. I don’t know what I’m going to tell them yet.” She paused, twisting the hem of her blouse. “If you see somebody else you want to play with, just know I won’t be jealous or anything.”
The idea of her playing with someone else did make him jealous, but that wasn’t something he felt like he should voice, so he buried it and gave her a smile.
“Just let me know when you’re ready to go home. I’m going to catch up with Gary and some of the other guys,” he said, hoping his disappointment was well masked.
Watching her walk away was hard. After a minute of standing alone in the quiet area, he moved back to the main living area and sidled up to Edith who was in the midst of a story about a scene gone awry with one of her subs.
When she finished, she turned to Peter and smiled. “Hey handsome. What’s Carrie doing with Damion?”
“Couldn’t tell you,” Peter said stoically.
Her face scrunched in confusion. “I thought you two were together.”
“We shared a car. That’s all. We’re still just friends and she’s free to do what she wants here.
The older Domme shook her head. “Kids these days confuse me.”
Peter’s laughter rumbled through the room and he couldn’t help but noticed that Carrie looked in his direction when she heard it. Her expression was odd, but she offered him a small wave. Had he scared her that much, asking her to play? He hoped not. Carrie went back to her conversation with Damion.
Peter watched it play out. She was negotiating with him, he could tell. With clenched fists, he prayed to the universe that she was unable to come to an agreement with the other Dom. But then she was standing in front of him.
“Everything OK?” he asked, trying to keep his expression and tone neutral.
She fidgeted for a moment and he tamped down his irritation and the urge to tell her to spit it out.
“Everything is fine. I don’t typically explain myself to anyone, but I feel like I owe you this.” He braced himself for what he knew was coming. “I’m going to do a quick scene with Damion in the backyard. He wants to break in a new bull whip. It’s nothing serious though, I swear.”
Ignoring the fact that it was a version of the scene he had asked her to do, he put his hands on her shoulders. “Carrie, I was serious when I said there is no pressure from me. You’re an unattached masochist at a BDSM party. Be yourself. Don’t let my interest in you stop you. I get that I’m offering you something that you’re not sure about yet.”
Again, he felt her shoulders sag in relief. Who had put it in her head that she owed him or anyone else anything in this lifestyle? The concern and respect she showed him by being upfront was refreshing, but this seemed like something he wanted to dig deeper into if she was ever ready.
Knowing that she was about to play with Damion, part of him wanted to step out and wait in the car, but something told him to stick around. It would be easy to observe Carrie’s scene from the window in the living room and hopefully keep her from being too uncomfortable while still getting some insight into how she enjoyed being played with.
As he settled in at the window, Carrie was lifting her blouse over her head, having already shoved her skirt and panties down. He inhaled sharply. Her tiny frame looked so fragile standing next to the tall man readying himself to play with her. He nearly cursed himself for turning down her offer of sex the other night.
Gary came up to him and followed his gaze out the window.
“I thought the two of you were together,” he said with the same puzzled expression as Edith.
Peter couldn’t help but chuckle. “We’re just friends and shared a car here.”
Gary eyed him and hummed. “But you shared a bed with her the other night and the two of you were clearly on some kind of date when I picked you up. You’re definitely interested.”
Peter sighed. “Yes. I’m interested. It’s complicated though.”
Gary nodded as his eyes drifted back to the scene unfolding in his backyard. “Oh damn. He’s pulling out the big guns tonight,” he said.
Now it was Peter’s turn to appear puzzled. “Big guns?”
“That’s a nasty whip. I’m not sure I would use it on someone I’d never played with before. I know Carrie can handle it, but Damion doesn’t.”
“Is he going to hurt her?” Peter asked.
Gary tossed his head back and laughed. “She is a masochist man.”
“Damn it, Gary, you know what I mean.”
“Sorry. Yes. I know what you mean. I don’t think there is anything to worry about. Damion’s a mean son of a bitch but I don’t think Carrie would play with him if she didn’t like that sort of thing.”
“I didn’t think they knew each other,” Peter said.
“They don’t, but Damion has a reputation in this community. I figure she’s at least heard of him.”
Peter thought that was a lot of assuming on Gary’s part. Maybe it was better that he had stayed to watch. Yes, that might make him sound like a pompous asshole, but he really didn’t care. He just wanted Carrie to be OK and he felt like he had somehow driven her to seek out a ‘mean son of a bitch,’ as Gary had put it.
Now Carrie was attached to the frame in Gary’s backyard much like she had been when Peter first saw her here. As Damion stood back and unfurled his whip, someone opened the sliding glass door that led outside. Peter took the opportunity to slip onto the deck and take a seat in one of the patio chairs. He hoped Carrie didn’t mind him watching. Jealousy was curling in his belly and threatening to come up in the form of bile, but he had to keep it together. Something about this girl was still pulling him toward her. It was important to pay attention to this attraction and see what was going to come of it.
Watching proved to be harder for Peter than he thought it would be. As Damion circled his prey with his whip in hand, Peter bounced his knee up and down. Thankfully, the Dom never touched Carrie with his hands. That would have been too much for Peter to watch. After another circle around the bound girl, Damion stepped away and cracked the whip. Carrie jumped at the sound and Peter could see her chest heaving as she panted. When the first strike of the whip fell across her back, she jumped again and yelled a curse word.
Damion moved closer to her and jerked her head back by her hair, whispering something in her air. Peter watched her eyes drift closed as she bobbed her head in agreement to whatever Damion was saying.
When he looked down at his lap, Peter noticed his fists were clenched. He willed himself to relax.
Then Damion drew the whip back and laid another stripe across Carrie’s back. This time she let out a full-blown scream and the sliding door flew open. Gary stepped out.
“Everything OK out here?” the tall Texan asked.
“I’m not sure. Something feels off to me but I don’t know either of their play styles so I can’t judge.”
The whip fell across Carrie’s skin again with a resounding snap and Carrie yelled, “Red.”
The sound of the universal safeword sent Peter to his feet, but Gary put his hand on his shoulder and stopped him.
“Not your scene man.”
Peter shook his head. Gary was right.
Damion lowered the whip and moved close to Carrie. He appeared to be whispering in her ear. Peter didn’t understand why the Dom hadn’t released her from the binds that attached her to the frame. She’d used her safeword. That should have completely ended the scene.
Damion appeared irritated and Peter watched Carrie’s face crumple. Damion reached up and undid her cuffs before tossing her the black sun dress and walking away. As he breezed past Peter and Gary, both of them heard him mutter, “Lying bitch calls herself a masochist.”
Peter looked to Carrie who was sitting on the ground with her dress in her hands and then back to Gary who was staring after Damion.
“Why the fuck is he her
e Gary? Are you going to do something about this?”
Gary held up a hand. “I’ll handle it. You go look after your girl.”
Peter didn’t need any more prodding to send him jogging across the yard to where Carrie still sat.
“Hey. What happened? How do I help?”
When she looked up, tears were streaming down her face. It took him less than a second to kneel in the grass next to her. When he was settled, he pulled her into his lap and held her close.
“Hey, it’s OK sweetheart. What happened?”
Her head was shaking back and forth as she buried her face in his shirt. After a few minutes of quiet crying, she raised her head and gave him a shaky smile. “I’m so sorry to cry on you like that.”
“Don’t apologize. That guy is an asshole.”
“Tell me about it,” she muttered as she tried to get out of his lap. Wrapping his arms around her, he held her in place.
“Hey. Are you sure you’re OK?”
“No. But I’d like to put my dress on before I talk if that’s OK.”
Peter smiled. “Sorry. Yes, of course. Do you want to talk out here or go inside? Or we could leave if you want.” Peter released her so she could stand and pull her dress on over her head.
When she had the simple black dress in place, she held her hand out for him to stand. He willingly accepted it and enjoyed the feel of her tiny hand in his.
“Let’s go inside. I bet Gary will let us talk in his office,” Peter said.
“Sounds good.”
Peter led the way and looked around the room for Gary. When he didn’t see him, they moved together through the house. At the end of the hall, almost to the quiet area, they stopped at the sound of slightly raised voices.
“You don’t leave a bottom just because she uses a safeword man. I thought you knew better.” Gary sounded like a disappointed father as he reprimanded Damion.
“I don’t like being lied to,” the other Dom bit out.
Peter felt Carrie tense beside him, and he tucked her close as they continued to listen.
“Just because she felt the need to safeword doesn’t mean she lied. I’ve known Carrie for years. Believe me, she didn’t lie. I think you need to leave. The only reason I’m not banning your ass is because we have history. You can come back next time, but I think it’s better if you go home for the night.”
“We should just go back to the living room,” Carrie whispered backing up.
Peter gripped her hand and let her lead them away. Part of him wanted to confront Damion and force him to apologize, but something told him that gesture wouldn’t be well received by Carrie.
They heard the front door slam just as they made it back to the main living area. Gary appeared a few minutes later and pulled Carrie into a hug.
“Sorry that happened cutie.”
“Don’t worry Gary, I’ll be OK.”
“Can Carrie and I use your office or some other private place to talk?”
Gary smiled. “Sure man. My house is your house. You know that. You can use the library on the second floor if you want.
Carrie’s eyes lit up at the mention of a library and Peter chuckled. He should have known she was a bibliophile. Taking her hand, he tugged her toward the stairs.
When they got to the library, he pulled her towards a plush love seat and sat, waiting for her to do the same.
“Gary’s loaded, isn’t he?” Carrie asked as she looked around the room before settling in next to him.
“Something like that.” Peter didn’t know all the details about Gary’s finances but loaded was probably a good descriptor for him.
“I knew he had money, but I never realized how much until just now.”
Peter nodded. “Yeah, he stays pretty quiet about it, but he lives well.”
They were quiet again and Peter wasn’t sure where to begin. In a way, it felt like he was providing the aftercare that should have come from Damion.
“What happened out there?” he finally asked.
“I’m not sure, but it has me freaked out. I’m a masochist through and through. I’ve been beaten to the point of bleeding before and loved every minute. Tonight though, I couldn’t handle it. It’s like something in my brain misfired and the pain wasn’t working for me.” Her body trembled as she took a deep breath. “I’ve had off nights before where I didn’t want or couldn’t handle as much as I normally can but nothing like this. And Damion seemed so mad at me that it just crushed me.”
Peter wanted to dig into why it crushed her and point out that maybe she was a little bit submissive after all but knew that would be a dick move. This wasn’t about him; it was about making sure she was OK.
“Damion is a class A prick and I’m mad that Gary isn’t banning him,” Peter said.
Carrie shook her head. “I’m not. Everyone has off nights. Even Doms. Yeah, he fucked up, but I’ll give him time to either apologize or prove that he’s a jerk and I’ll forget about him. I don’t hold grudges or let people get to me like that.”
Peter admired that quality in her. It was one he hadn’t quite developed for himself.
“Do you mind if we just sit for a few minutes? I could use the silence for a bit to calm my brain. Then maybe we can talk.”
Peter pulled her close to him and grabbed the blanket from the back of the couch.
“Of course, sweetheart. Take all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter Sixteen
Carrie snuggled closer to Peter on the love seat in Gary’s library and tried to hide her embarrassment. This wasn’t the sort of thing that typically happened to her. When it came to playing with people in the kink scene, she was laid back and carefree. Bad scenes were rare for her. There may be people she didn’t love playing with, but she still appreciated those for the experiences she gained. If it wasn’t something she enjoyed, she would politely decline playing with them again in the future. This method had served her well for years.
This though, she didn’t quite know how to handle. Peter was asking all the right questions and was being incredibly sweet about making sure she was OK, but she still felt wildly embarrassed. Especially considering that he had asked her to play earlier and she’d turned him down.
Now here he was doing another top’s job. How could she make it up to him? Then an idea occurred to her after a few minutes of silence hung between them.
“Do you still want to play?” she asked shyly.
“Are you asking because it’s what you actually want, or because you feel bad that I’m in here doing Damion’s job?” His tone was kind, but his eyes were intense and seemed to hold some disapproval as they stared into her. Crap. He had seen right through her.
She squirmed away from him, but he caught her chin in his hand and forced her eyes to him.
“Hey, I still want to play with you but not now. Not like this, OK? Again, this isn’t me turning you down. It’s me saying let’s wait until it’s right.”
Well now she felt even worse. Standing, she moved to a shelf of books to examine Gary’s collection. It was a gorgeous library and she felt safe here.
Turning to him, she offered him the brightest smile she could muster and hoped that he couldn’t tell it was fake.
“I don’t feel like I’m being very good company right now, but I don’t want to tear you away from the party. Would you mind leaving me alone for a little while? Maybe I’ll find a book and read until you’re ready to go home.”
He was by her side in an instant, his eyes piercing into her again. The way his gaze held her was unnerving.
“Don’t shut me out just because you’re embarrassed, Carrie. I came here to spend time with you. If you’re ready to go, we can.”
She was shaking her head even before he finished. “No. Please, I’ll be fine. Go hang out with Gary and Edith.”
“I can hang out with them later. I want to make sure you’re OK. I’m not going to let you shut me out.”
She wanted to be irritated by his pe
rsistence and had a feeling if she put her foot down, he would leave, but she found him oddly comforting.
“Thank you,” she whispered, drawing in a shaky breath.
“No need to thank me. Come sit back down and talk to me. We don’t have to talk about what happened unless you want to.”
Carrie followed him back to the love seat and curled into the corner. “I honestly don’t know what I want right now. Why don’t you tell me how you’re doing?”
Peter frowned. “This isn’t about me, little one. I’m taking care of you right now.”
Her pulse quickened when he called her little one which was odd. Normally she cringed when a Dom used a submissive term of endearment with her. When Peter did it, she got warm and fuzzy.
“Humor me then. I don’t have anything to say and I would like to know how you’re feeling.”
He sighed and picked up her hand. “Mind if I’m brutally honest?”
Carrie shifted so she could better look him in the eyes. “It would disappoint me if you were anything less.”
“I hated watching someone else hurt you. I know. I know,” he said holding up his hands. “You’re a masochist. But I want you Carrie and I didn’t like seeing you with someone else. That said, I want to take care of you and give you what you need. I can inflict pain when it’s called for and I even enjoy giving certain kinds.”
His revelation took her words for a moment. Unable to speak, she just looked at him. Why did he want her? When was the last time she felt like someone actually wanted her? Carrie couldn’t remember but knew it had been a long time. The way Peter looked at her though, she could feel his desire. The need to apologize overcame her.
“I’m sorry for everything that happened tonight. I’m glad you’re here to keep me from shutting down,” she said, meeting his gaze again.
“I’m not glad this happened, but I’m glad I was here for you too. Fate is weird and seems to have flung us together. I’m a realist, but I don’t tend to ignore what the universe is trying to tell me.”
That made her smile. “I’m sorry I can’t just make things easy and say yes to what you’re offering me. I’ve got baggage I need to unpack. But I’ll think about it. Maybe at the next party we can play.”