by Liz Bradford
“Touché.”
Gavin looked back through his scope. When he’d been deployed overseas, he had killed with a rifle much like the one he now owned. Those kills weighed heavy on his heart every day, but it had been his job. He had done it to save lives. But today, this man who had lain in this very spot took the life of a man outside of a war zone. Did it weigh on his conscience? Or was he a ruthless killer with no moral compass? What kind of man were they now looking for? Was he a complete psychopath?
And if he was this ruthless… when would he strike again?
Monday evening Jocelyn entered Adam’s house behind him. While he greeted Ella, Jocelyn squatted and petted his golden retriever, Rusty. After kissing her fiancé, Ella came over and gave Jocelyn a hug. Jocelyn choked back the tears that threatened to start up again.
“How did the meeting with the lawyer go?” Ella pulled out of the hug.
Jocelyn shrugged. Adam had gone with her after work to see his friend, a divorce lawyer. “Just your run-of-the-mill Monday night, drafting up papers to end the marriage I promised to be in ‘til death do us part.’” Jocelyn met Ella’s eyes.
Her friend pursed her lips and tilted her head to the side, unamused by Jocelyn’s sarcasm, but sympathetic.
“Anyway, the house is really coming together. Looks like the remodeling is almost complete.”
Ella smiled. “Almost. It will be all ready for me to move in just under a month from now. We have a bit of painting left to do, but that’s it. Well, other than adding my feminine touches.”
Jocelyn laughed. Ella winked at Adam, who shook his head. Jocelyn had to ask, “Are you two really okay with living in this house after everything that happened here?”
Ella’s and Adam’s smiles faded a little. Adam crossed his arms. “That’s why we did such a massive renovation. But this is the house we dreamed of having.”
“And we aren’t about to let Scott take that away from us,” Ella added. “He took enough from me. He can’t have this house too.”
Jocelyn nodded. The kitchen and living room looked the same as they had before that dreadful night last fall, but the back of the house had changed drastically. Ella would have a little office where Adam’s workout room had been, and the back of the house now had a weight room, while an upstairs had been added with two bedrooms and an additional bathroom. “I’m glad.”
The three went into the kitchen where Ella had tacos waiting. They sat at the table and ate. Ella talked about her day with her students, and they all laughed at Molly and Callie’s latest dramatic stories. It felt good to have a nice light-hearted dinner and spend time with people outside of work. She had holed herself up so much in the last four months that she had nearly forgotten what it was like to eat with a fellow human being.
After dinner, Jocelyn stood to help clean up, but Adam stopped her. “Oh, no you don’t. We got this.”
Jocelyn turned and rested against the breakfast bar while Adam and Ella cleared the table. Adam carried their plates over to the sink and set them in before turning toward her and leaning on the counter opposite of her. His eyes were serious but kind.
“So, when are you going to tell Gavin the baby is his?”
Clang! A glass bowl clamored against the hardwood floors. Jocelyn’s eyes darted to Ella who stood dead in her tracks, hands up as if the bowl was still in her hands.
Jocelyn took a deep breath and looked back at Adam, whose eyes hadn’t left her. Her stomach caught in her throat at the intensity of his gaze.
“Beats me. But how did you know?”
“I’m not an idiot, Joc.”
“Didn’t say you were, but how?”
“Well, I suspected something had gone on between you, so when you showed up four months pregnant and the very next night Gavin confessed to having an affair that ended three months ago, that math was easy to do. Especially since I knew it couldn’t be Patrick’s baby.”
“Oh.”
“I’m not judging—that’s between you and God—but I do know Gavin thinks the baby is Patrick’s, by some miracle. He has a right to know the truth.”
“I know, and I want to tell him, but I’m waiting for the right time.”
Ella set the Pyrex bowl on the end of the counter and looked at Jocelyn. “There won’t be a ‘right time.’”
Jocelyn sighed, her heart heavy at the idea of the conversation she needed to have with Gavin. “True. But I don’t know how to tell him. I don’t even know how he’ll react. What if he wants me to have an abortion too?”
Adam furrowed his brow. “You know the answer to that question.”
A rueful laugh escaped her lips. “I know, he would never. But I’m just scared, especially after how Patrick—”
Adam reached across the counter and squeezed her hand. “Is that why Patrick hit you? Because you refused to get an abortion?”
Jocelyn nodded.
“Well, I can guarantee that Gavin will demand nothing like that. I have no idea how he’ll react other than shocked, at first. But you have to trust God with that.”
“Yeah… trying to figure out how to do that again.” She looked down at her hands. Adam removed his. “How is Gavin?” She looked back up at Adam.
“Hurt.”
She closed her eyes. Why did she…
“But”—Adam continued—“he’s doing all right. It brought up some pain he felt from all that happened with Nikki, but he’s turning to the right places.”
She dropped her shoulders. She was more like her best friend than she wanted to admit. She had seen the hurt on Gavin’s face when Nikki took off. She could only imagine his face had been similar when she stopped calling. “I didn’t mean…”
“I know, Jocelyn. Nikki’s death caused him to lean heavy on Christ, and this situation has done that too.”
“I thought you two weren’t really friends back then?”
“We weren’t, but we’ve gotten a little closer since we’ve been working together and are in the same Bible study.”
“How do I make this right?” She looked at Ella and back at Adam.
Ella gripped Jocelyn’s shoulder. “Keep your eyes on Christ and His work on the Cross. You can’t change what happened, but you can take it all to Jesus and trust Him as you navigate through the next steps. And one step at a time. Tell Gavin about the baby and keep yourself safe from Patrick. You came to the altar at church on Sunday, so I’m guessing you’ve taken that first step.”
Jocelyn nodded.
“Then lean into Him. He forgives you and wants to work things together for your good.”
“For my good? How can what happened be any good?”
One of Ella’s shoulders came up to her ear, and she smiled. “Well, one way is you get to be a mom.”
Her lips couldn’t help but curl up despite the heaviness of her heart. “I never thought that would happen. But we’re going to be on our own. I don’t even know how I’m going to pay the bills. Where will we live? I’ll have to get childcare. I don’t even know if I make enough to cover the basics. Patrick has always handled all the money. Which reminds me, I really wanted to thank you both for dinner. I’m running low on food, and Patrick hasn’t given me money yet this week.”
Adam’s eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean by that? Don’t you have a debit card?”
“I do, but Patrick controls the account. He just puts in what I need for food and such.”
Adam’s mouth was agape.
Ella snorted. “That’s not okay. You’ve gotta eat.”
“You really have no access to your own money? Is your name on the account that your paycheck goes into?”
“Well, it is, but he pulls the money out of it as soon as it goes in and then puts the amount for our grocery budget back in. That’s the way it’s been since shortly after we got married. And I don’t have access to the other account.”
“Well,”—Ella turned toward the door and picked up her purse—“I’m taking you to the grocery store.”
“You
don’t have—”
“Yes, I do. I’m not letting you go hungry. Adam and I have enough money to share.”
Jocelyn wiggled her nose to sniff away the tears. Adam came around the bar and hugged Jocelyn.
“We will not let Patrick control your life any longer.”
She stepped back from him. “It’s not that big of a deal. I’m sure he just forgot.”
Adam took her by the shoulders and looked her dead in the eye. “That’s what every abused woman has ever said. But it’s not right. And after tomorrow, when he gets served those divorce papers, do you think he’s going to magically ‘remember’ to give you money for food?”
She looked down at the floor and back up at Adam. He was right. Patrick was not going to be happy with the papers. He had always loved controlling everything. The man would control the weather if he could. “He’s going to be really mad.”
“Yep, and that’s why we put an order of protection in place. If he violates that by even a centimeter, I’ll throw his sorry butt in jail.”
She smiled at Adam’s passion. He was always the protector. “Okay.”
“Good,” Ella said. “Now, let’s go get you some groceries. You and the baby need to eat.”
“I’m going to the hardware store while you two get food.” Adam picked up his keys from the counter. “I’m changing the locks at your house.”
Tuesday morning Gavin sat his desk feeling like he was swimming in a sea of cases. How had they managed to get caught in so many at the same time? Marie Bender. Arthur Moon. Ralph Epps. Jocelyn North. They were still looking for Moon’s girlfriend and hadn’t been able to determine if Mrs. Bender was his Marie. There were zero leads on the sniper case, but Gavin couldn’t help but wonder if Ross Bender was involved in all of them. Gavin had found proof that Ross owned a rifle that shot .308. But they still couldn’t find him.
“Palmer, what’s the status of Jocelyn’s case against Patrick?” Gavin looked across his desk at his partner. Of course, their focus had been dealing with the other cases, but Gavin hadn’t forgotten about Jocelyn. He couldn’t. Yet every time he had asked Becca about it in the last two days, she had given him a non-answer at best. “Aren’t we going to interview him at some point? And arrest him, for that matter.”
Becca sighed. “Well… I was unsuccessful in convincing Jocelyn to pursue charges.”
“What?!” He dropped his hand on his desk.
“That’s why I didn’t want to talk to you about it. I don’t feel like dealing with you losing your cool, because I’m barely keeping mine.” Becca pressed her fingers against her temples. “I tried to convince her! But she just doesn’t want to press charges.” Becca’s voice dropped, and she leaned across her desk. “Gavin, I’m afraid for her and the baby.”
His heart thumped a little harder. “Yeah, me too.”
Becca’s eyes darted back and forth and then locked with Gavin’s. “Maybe you could talk to her. I know you aren’t as close as you were, but maybe she’d listen to you.”
“I don’t know about that, but I’m definitely going to try. I can’t stand the idea of him getting away with hurting her.”
Adam came up and dropped a piece of paper on Becca’s desk. “I couldn’t get through to her either, but this will make you two a little happier, anyway. I did at least convince her to file for a DVPO. We just got back from seeing the judge. I don’t really expect Patrick to respect a piece of paper, though…”
“Well, a protective order is a step in the right direction.” Gavin leaned back in his chair and ran his hand through his hair. “But I really wish he was behind bars because, like you said, he’s not going to care about some judge’s order.”
Adam checked his watch. “We need to keep an eye out for Patrick today, too.”
“Why? You think he’ll be that upset about a restraining order?” Gavin sat up a little straighter.
“There’s more to it than that.”
“What?”
Adam just shook his head and walked over to his desk.
Gavin put up his hands, palms toward the ceiling. “You know what that’s about?” he asked Becca.
“No, but I have my suspicions.”
“Care to enlighten me?”
“Nope.” She kept her eyes fixed on the pen in her hand and didn’t make eye contact with him.
He leaned on his desk. “Why not?”
Becca shook her head. “I can’t. Not my place.”
“Fine.” He pushed up from his desk. “I’m going to see if I can convince her to press charges.”
“Good luck.”
Gavin left the squad room and went down the stairs and through the long hallway to the lab as fast as he could without raising suspicion of an emergency. The idea of seeing Jocelyn made his heart constrict. He hadn’t been able to get his mind off of her since Friday. He loved her, and that made it impossible for him not to worry about her safety. Patrick reminded him so much of his father—totally cool, having fun, joking around one minute, and in a rage of fury the next. The littlest things would set him off, both his dad and Patrick.
About seven years ago, shortly after Gavin and Nikki had gotten married, they had gone to Patrick and Jocelyn’s for dinner. Everything had been wonderful, everyone had been happy and laughing, but then Jocelyn hadn’t opened the bottle of beer she had brought to the living room for Patrick. As she went to get the bottle opener, he threw the bottle of beer, and it shattered on the wall less than two feet away from the door frame Jocelyn was walking through.
A shiver went down Gavin’s spine. Jocelyn had always insisted that Patrick didn’t hit her. While that was technically true, Gavin knew Patrick abused her in many other ways over the years.
Most of it she didn’t recognize as abuse, and, frankly, he hadn’t either, at first. But he should have known better. He should have done something, said something sooner. If he hadn’t been so caught up in his own grief and getting his degree and making detective he could’ve looked out for Jocelyn like he should have and could’ve been a friend to Patrick like he should have been. Not that he hadn’t tried. He had tried to get Patrick to come to church when Jocelyn had started coming. But maybe not hard enough… Deep in his soul he knew it wasn’t his job to make Patrick a better person, but he still felt guilty.
He swiped his ID to let him into the lab area and navigated around the corner and down the hall. Jocelyn’s office door open. His heart thumped against his chest. He slowed his pace as he approached her door. He stopped and rapped gently on the door jam.
“Yes?” Jocelyn turned from her desk. The slight smile that had been on her lips vanished instantly.
“Hey, have a minute?”
“Sure. Did Adam send you down here?”
“No, why would he?”
“Never mind. What’s up?” She stood and took a step toward him.
“I…” He pursed his lips together. “Why aren’t you pressing charges against Patrick?”
She stepped back. Her mouth dropped open, and she inhaled sharply.
His tone had been more abrasive than he intended. He breathed out slowly and relaxed his shoulders. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to come across so harsh. I’m just concerned.”
“I’ll be fine, Gavin. Don’t worry yourself with me. I got a restraining order.”
“It’s not enough.”
“Well, it’ll have to be. He’s been your friend. I would think of anyone, you would understand. I press charges, and his career is ruined.”
“Your safety is more important than his career.”
“It’s not your place to decide that.”
He sighed. “I know. But … I just…”
“What?”
He shook his head. He wanted to tell her how much he still loved her and that she mattered more to him than anyone in the world, but he didn’t dare. That wouldn’t be fair to either of them. “I think he needs to face the consequences of his choices.”
“And he will. Just trust me to make the decisions
myself.”
Bang. Bang. Bang. The sound of someone pounding on a door down the hall turned both of their heads. A muffled voice followed “Jocelyn! Let me in now!”
Gavin’s heart pounded. He looked at Jocelyn, who stood there in the middle of her office like a terrified child. “I’ll tell him to get lost.”
“No!” Jocelyn grabbed his arm before he could turn.
His whole arm tingled at her touch. “You can’t talk to him.”
She released his arm. “But if you go out there, he might suspect something…”
“Like what he should have suspected six months ago? He doesn’t know then?”
“No. He found out I had an affair”—she looked down at her hands and then back up to his eyes—“but he doesn’t know it was you.”
“You put a restraining order out against him. You shouldn’t talk to him.”
Patrick continued to pound on the door.
“Fine, go. But here.” She turned and grabbed a folder off of her desk. “Can you give this to Ramirez? I’m trying to avoid the stairs at all cost. I’m still sore.”
“Sure. But you need to press charges.”
“I know you do. And I’m inclined to agree, but I just can’t.”
The curse words coming from down the hall were becoming more inappropriate. “I’m going to tell him to leave.”
“Thanks, Gavin.”
He smiled at her. The last thing he wanted to do was leave the room. However, he didn’t have a choice. He turned and left, but a little piece of his heart remained with her even as he walked down the hall to face the obnoxious jerk who used to be his friend. Gavin turned the corner and saw Patrick through the panel of wired glass in the door. Patrick stopped banging on the door as soon as he saw Gavin.
“Hey, Riley.” Patrick’s voice changed. “Can you open the door for me? I need to talk to my wife.”
Gavin shook his head. “Sorry, man. I can’t do that.”
“Sure, you can. At least go get her then.”
“Ain’t gonna happen.”
Patrick slammed his fist against the door. “Come on, Riley. What the h—”
“No.”
The red in Patrick’s face deepened. Gavin half expected steam to come out of Patrick’s ears as he paced in front of the door. Patrick was in his full police uniform, including his gun. Gavin’s heart pounded a little harder. He didn’t like an angry man, much less an armed, angry man.